Annoying jehovah witness

Montcalm · Post by **Montcalm** » 2003-01-25 10:23am

Two jehovah witness came at my door this morning and instead of bugging me with their reading they started about the war with Iraq and will the forces of good will win over the forces of evil.

so like everyone does i shut the door in their fucking faces.

they should be in the witness relocation program.

Sektor31 · Post by **Sektor31** » 2003-01-25 10:44am

Next time they ring, just put ketchup or red paint on your face in random spots and get 2 big knives. When they come, you know what to do.

Post by **Ghost Rider** » 2003-01-25 10:53am

Not being creative enough..you have to engage them in conversation and ask them would they like to sacrifice a small boy or girl to your lord Chtulu.

Sektor31 · Post by **Sektor31** » 2003-01-25 11:06am

Hmm, I was thinking of something along the line of dancing around and yelling "I AM SERVANT OF THE DARK KING SATAN, HAVE YOU COME TO BRING YOURSELVES AS SACRIFICES? HAHAHA!!!"

But that would work too.

Post by **Ghost Rider** » 2003-01-25 11:08am

They try smite you...no you have to go with Elder Gods or something like the Greek Gods where they won't think anything else except your loony.

SyntaxVorlon · Post by **SyntaxVorlon** » 2003-01-25 11:28am

Find out where they live and ask them to become athiests. Bother them at 6pm when they're eating dinner or answering telemarketing calls.

Darksider · Post by **Darksider** » 2003-01-25 12:08pm

jehovahs witnesses are the most annnoying people on the planet

Jw's are just annoying there is a large group of them near where i live and they come around every day at like 1:00 (good thing i'm not home) unfortunetly one day the teachers at my school had an inservice and the buggers cought me

i wish i could find out where the hell they are coming from

Montcalm · Post by **Montcalm** » 2003-01-25 12:14pm

I wonder when they knock at a door if its a muslim man do they turn back or annoy him anyway?

Darksider · Post by **Darksider** » 2003-01-25 12:20pm

Montcalm wrote:I wonder when they knock at a door if its a muslim man do they turn back or annoy him anyway?

i'm not sure but given how relentless the JW's near my house are they'd probably anoy him anyway

salm · Post by **salm** » 2003-01-25 12:32pm

why shouldnt they anoy muslims? wouldnt they want to convert them anyway or are the JWs racist?

jaeger115 · Post by **jaeger115** » 2003-01-25 01:17pm

Strange.... My interpreter is a JW and she's pretty reasonable and logical. And she doesn't bother me about my lack of faith.

Lord Pounder · Post by **Lord Pounder** » 2003-01-25 01:40pm

The last time a JW was on Xmas day. I told them i was too busy celebrating the birth of the true god and that if they wanted to join me they were welcome. The declined. But they shot me a look of pure hate when i wished them a Merry Christmas

Montcalm · Post by **Montcalm** » 2003-01-25 01:47pm

Darth Pounder wrote:The last time a JW was on Xmas day. I told them i was too busy celebrating the birth of the true god and that if they wanted to join me they were welcome. The declined. But they shot me a look of pure hate when i wished them a Merry Christmas

Ouch they don`t want us to spit on their religious belief but they spit on others.

Lord Pounder · Post by **Lord Pounder** » 2003-01-25 01:50pm

I'm not a christian i just said it all coz i knew it would annoy them

Biddybot · Post by **Biddybot** » 2003-01-25 02:11pm

The JWs have been working on me for the last couple of years. I don't really mind them--I'm usually working or sleeping off a night shift anyway so they just leave their literature in my mailbox and go their merry way. If it's summer and I don't want them (or anyone else) visiting, I just put the geese out in the front yard and then they're afraid to open the gate and come in. Or I just lock the gate, period. I've only actually talked to them about five times in the past four years.

I've been told that if you tell them you're Wiccan, they'll blacklist you and never come near your house again. Might be worth a try if you're really being pestered!

The Mormons were funnier. They tried to convert me too until they found out that I was actually much older than I appeared--not a viable 'breeder' anymore--after which they dropped me like a hot potato.

jaeger115 · Post by **jaeger115** » 2003-01-25 02:13pm

The Mormons were funnier. They tried to convert me too until they found out that I was actually much older than I appeared--not a viable 'breeder' anymore--after which they dropped me like a hot potato.

"Viable breeder"?

Darksider · Post by **Darksider** » 2003-01-25 02:14pm

jaeger115 wrote:
The Mormons were funnier. They tried to convert me too until they found out that I was actually much older than I appeared--not a viable 'breeder' anymore--after which they dropped me like a hot potato.
"Viable breeder"?

i'll second that question. what the hell????

Einhander Sn0m4n · Post by **Einhander Sn0m4n** » 2003-01-25 02:18pm

Darksider wrote:
jaeger115 wrote:
The Mormons were funnier. They tried to convert me too until they found out that I was actually much older than I appeared--not a viable 'breeder' anymore--after which they dropped me like a hot potato.
"Viable breeder"?

i'll second that question. what the hell????

I'll third that!
WTF?!!

Asst. Asst. Lt. Cmdr. Smi · Post by **Asst. Asst. Lt. Cmdr. Smi** » 2003-01-25 02:24pm

jaeger115 wrote:
The Mormons were funnier. They tried to convert me too until they found out that I was actually much older than I appeared--not a viable 'breeder' anymore--after which they dropped me like a hot potato.
"Viable breeder"?

I believe they need young virile males to have 12 kids, so they have more people who can go door to door looking for "viable breeders".

jaeger115 · Post by **jaeger115** » 2003-01-25 02:26pm

I believe they need young virile males to have 12 kids, so they have more people who can go door to door looking for "viable breeders".

Ohhh, my disdain of the moromons went up by 200 percent.

jaeger115 · Post by **jaeger115** » 2003-01-25 02:28pm

IIRC, I read a report saying that women who have kids tend to live shorter lives than women who don't have any. I'd say mormon doctrine is damaging to these women who want to lead long, full lives.

HemlockGrey · Post by **HemlockGrey** » 2003-01-25 02:32pm

Its'...it's like a self-replicating virus that exists only to spread itself...

Montcalm · Post by **Montcalm** » 2003-01-25 02:37pm

jaeger115 wrote:IIRC, I read a report saying that women who have kids tend to live shorter lives than women who don't have any. I'd say mormon doctrine is damaging to these women who want to lead long, full lives.

If i read this correctly the mormons are a bunch of pervert.

Biddybot · Post by **Biddybot** » 2003-01-25 02:50pm

Women who choose not to get married and have children, or worse, get married and then not have children even though they could, are frankly of no use to the Mormons' family-oriented lifestyle. Please don't get me wrong--I rather like the Mormons. I've always found them pretty up front about what they expect of a person and their role in society, and if Christian-based values and devoting your life to family and raising a brood of kids makes a person happy, then it's not that bad a religion for a woman to get into. But if that's not what you want...see ya!

They probably would have remained interested had I expressed a wish to adopt a lonely widower and his ten or twelve kids and they JUST happened to have that very situation available...(deep shudder on my part)...

Keevan_Colton · Post by **Keevan_Colton** » 2003-01-25 03:08pm

As for dealing with JW's, I've a handy trick up my sleeve *gestures across at his pic*
Though, that's best saved for cloudy and dark times...ither than that, I find preaching Odinisim to them to be rather amusing....Odin was the norse god of vengance amongst other things....a charming chap really.....if just a little bloody...

The mormons I've no time for....they claim historic roots even though they are clearly fabricated....thats worse than the ones who base thier bullshit of real old bullshit.