Farting in front of a girl

Gil Hamilton · Post by **Gil Hamilton** » 2003-01-26 12:52am

Exonerate wrote:Let it out slowly so nobody notices. If it smells, then immediately point at the closet guy to you, and accuse them of farting, effectively redirecting the blame

Don't you know the Golden Rule?!
"He who smelled it, dealt it!"

TrailerParkJawa · Post by **TrailerParkJawa** » 2003-01-26 12:54am

I rode a bus today to Kirkwood ( skiing ) and tried to hold my fart as long as possible because I didnt want to rip a fart on a crowded bus but eventually I had to let it go. Luckilly there was a bathroom so I did it in there.

As for the question about sex, Ive never farted during sex, but in some positions they women makes fart like noises from the area that isnt supposed to fart.

RedImperator · Post by **RedImperator** » 2003-01-26 02:54am

Admiral Valdemar wrote:
The Dark wrote:
Pu-239 wrote:I can fart in silence, but the odor can be smelt at more than 4 feet away.
Ah, the classic SBD...silent but deadly.
My cat does those... female too.

Cats don't have ass cheeks, so they never make a sound. But Jesus, you'd never think an animal the size of a hearty meatloaf could generate a stink that could kill the houseplants from across the room.

Solid Snake · Post by **Solid Snake** » 2003-01-26 03:00am

Well, since my fiance and i fart in front of each other, and actually try to make it louder, i dont think she minds when i let one go... Untill it smells like "burnt potato chips" in her own words..

Damaramu · Post by **Damaramu** » 2003-01-26 04:27am

I once ripped one in front of my mom. I tried to see how long I could extend it out, which surprisingly was for a while.

After a few seconds, my mom slapped me on the arm and said: "Stop it! You sound like a motorcycle!"

Einhander Sn0m4n · Post by **Einhander Sn0m4n** » 2003-01-26 05:37am

innerbrat wrote:
Next of Kin wrote:Does anyone here fart while having nookie?
'Casionally, if the angle is so much it gets forced out. And that's not the worst that can happen.

Sex tips for Girls no. 26:
Always go to the loo before and after sex.

Note: This tip is MANDATORY for gay sex as well. I could go into excruciating technical detail as to why, but I'll just trust everyone's imagination to fill in the missing details

Hint: when it goes wrong, It goes REALLY WRONG!!!!

Lord Pounder · Post by **Lord Pounder** » 2003-01-26 09:55am

My older sister, the snob, refused to fart in public as such she got to the point where there is a hole in her prostate.

Einhander Sn0m4n · Post by **Einhander Sn0m4n** » 2003-01-26 10:16am

Darth Pounder wrote:My older sister, the snob, refused to fart in public as such she got to the point where there is a hole in her prostate.

Don't you mean Colon? Only guys have a G-Spot-- ahem, "Prostate."

InnerBrat · Post by **InnerBrat** » 2003-01-26 10:56am

Einhander Sn0m4n wrote:
innerbrat wrote:
Next of Kin wrote:Does anyone here fart while having nookie?
'Casionally, if the angle is so much it gets forced out. And that's not the worst that can happen.

Sex tips for Girls no. 26:
Always go to the loo before and after sex.
Note: This tip is MANDATORY for gay sex as well. I could go into excruciating technical detail as to why, but I'll just trust everyone's imagination to fill in the missing details Hint: when it goes wrong, It goes REALLY WRONG!!!!

Yep, heard about that as well. but at least that's after, not during.

Einhander Sn0m4n · Post by **Einhander Sn0m4n** » 2003-01-26 10:59am

innerbrat wrote:
Einhander Sn0m4n wrote:
innerbrat wrote: 'Casionally, if the angle is so much it gets forced out. And that's not the worst that can happen.

Sex tips for Girls no. 26:
Always go to the loo before and after sex.
Note: This tip is MANDATORY for gay sex as well. I could go into excruciating technical detail as to why, but I'll just trust everyone's imagination to fill in the missing details Hint: when it goes wrong, It goes REALLY WRONG!!!!
Yep, heard about that as well. but at least that's after, not during.

No, trust me. It IS During as well. When trouble wants to come down the pipe, it WILL come when it wants to, and it's guaranteed to be MESSY MESSY MESSY!!!!

Admiral Valdemar · Post by **Admiral Valdemar** » 2003-01-26 12:37pm

Lol, sounds like farting is the ultimate bioweapon.

Post by **The Yosemite Bear** » 2003-01-26 03:38pm

lol

looks at UN inspection team

"I'm not cooking the CHILI!"

UN: We can't find any red beans, or red bean residue but lack of evidence is evidance that Mr. YB is building a large Bioweapons facility....

Dodge · Post by **Dodge** » 2003-01-27 11:31am

I'm well known at work for my flatulence, and have actually expelled so much methane in these 6 years that there is a fan near my desk for my nearest coworker to use.

The funniest time I farted at work was one time I blew out an absolute ripsnorter which was received with loud dissent by people around me. I then proceeded to laugh like a drain and returned to my seat. Only then did I see the Financial Director showing a visitor around the company...

(We still laugh about that one today)

But other than that, I normally pump them out without embarrassment. If you can't stand the heat...

My wife and I do not hold them in for each other.

Dark Primus · Post by **Dark Primus** » 2003-01-27 04:14pm

I rather not let them out in public if there are people standing close to me.
But sometimes it can smell just as bad like a dead pig.