USAF = comfy chairs for $7.6 million

Post by **Vympel** » 2008-07-21 04:30am

Over the past three years, according to the Washington Post, the Air Force has asked to pull $16.2 million from counter-terrorism funds to build "comfort capsules," sealed rooms installed in large military planes decked out with beds, a couch, 37-inch flat-screen monitor, and other amenities "to reflect the rank of the senior leaders using the capsule." The Project on Government Oversight says that these capsules actually have "no special communications or work capabilities beyond those already available for top officials." And yes, they already have two high-end add-ons for top brass, as well 100 special VIP planes. But they don't have swiveling leather chairs custom-designed by top generals.

Just how special are these chairs? It's specified that that they must swivel so that "the longitudinal axis of the seat is parallel to the longitudinal axis of the aircraft" no matter which direction they're facing in. And they've gotta have Air Force blue leather and seat belts. Not brown, according to emails. Changing the seat color only cost $68,240.

Originally, ten of these capsules were ordered, but it's been cut to three, plus four Senior Leader Intransit Pallets with those awesome chairs. So, in all, it'll only cost $7.6 million. That might seem like a lot, but realize that, in the words of Gen. Robert H. McMahon, the Air Force's deputy chief of staff for logistics, they're trying to "create an environment that whoever was riding in that would be proud of" and that the "the people of the United States" would be proud of too.

I really don't understand why Congress twice told them not use counter-terrorism funds. Those very awesome chairs make me proud to be an American, which means the terrorists fail. [Washington Post via Slashdot]

Brilliant.

hongi · Post by **hongi** » 2008-07-21 05:30am

Unbelievable. Think how many up-armoured humvees that money could have bought...

Lonestar · Post by **Lonestar** » 2008-07-21 05:38am

Yeah, Shep was talking it about last week and how the Washington Times broke the story, but no one here reads the Moonie Times so it slid under everyone's radar.

PeZook · Post by **PeZook** » 2008-07-21 06:15am

That might seem like a lot, but realize that, in the words of Gen. Robert H. McMahon, the Air Force's deputy chief of staff for logistics, they're trying to "create an environment that whoever was riding in that would be proud of" and that the "the people of the United States" would be proud of too.

This kind of attitude pisses me off. Apparently, doing marketing has become fashionable everywhere, to the point of ridiculousness.

The Air Force is about bombing people, for fuck's sake! Generals should be proud of riding in bare-bones shaky and noisy air transports, proving how hard-ass they are, unlike those stupid Navy pansies with their comfy chairs and coffee cups on demand and impossibility of violently dying if the engines fail.

Lonestar · Post by **Lonestar** » 2008-07-21 06:47am

PeZook wrote:
This kind of attitude pisses me off. Apparently, doing marketing has become fashionable everywhere, to the point of ridiculousness.

The Air Force is about bombing people, for fuck's sake! Generals should be proud of riding in bare-bones shaky and noisy air transports, proving how hard-ass they are, unlike those stupid Navy pansies with their comfy chairs and coffee cups on demand and impossibility of violently dying if the engines fail.

I hope you are pushed off the edge of a carrier in the middle of the North Atlantic. Going 40kts.

PeZook · Post by **PeZook** » 2008-07-21 07:00am

Lonestar wrote: I hope you are pushed off the edge of a carrier in the middle of the North Atlantic. Going 40kts.

Unlikely to happen

I still have no idea why Air Force generals don't like the idea of proving how much more hardcore and manly they are compared to other branches. Those chairs are pretty much the ultimate fail in this regard, there's no way the air force can now claim they're not comfort-seeking wusses

MKSheppard · Post by **MKSheppard** » 2008-07-21 07:42am

Lonestar wrote:Yeah, Shep was talking it about last week and how the Washington Times broke the story, but no one here reads the Moonie Times so it slid under everyone's radar.

This is from the Washington Post actually.

The Washington Times broke the "Veterans Affairs uses Vets as Guinea Pigs for Drug -- which makes people Psychotic" story.

Tsyroc · Post by **Tsyroc** » 2008-07-21 08:12am

PeZook wrote:
I still have no idea why Air Force generals don't like the idea of proving how much more hardcore and manly they are compared to other branches. Those chairs are pretty much the ultimate fail in this regard, there's no way the air force can now claim they're not comfort-seeking wusses

The first problem there is if they were interested in proving how hard core they are they wouldn't have joined the Air Force to begin with.

Siege · Post by **Siege** » 2008-07-21 08:16am

Chairforce indeed...

SirNitram · Post by **SirNitram** » 2008-07-21 08:45am

Heh. I thought I posted this here, but instead to another board. I repeat my general thoughts from when WaPo broke it:

It's bad enough they're embracing the mock-moniker. It's bad enough they're using government funds to pay for this farce. And it's even worse that they try to sell it as necessary. But none of these are the worst problem!

Nope, they had to use anti-terror money to do it. Just to further remind everyone how insanely farcical the entire war on terror has been.

Stuart · Post by **Stuart** » 2008-07-21 08:57am

hongi wrote:Unbelievable. Think how many up-armoured humvees that money could have bought...

Think how many black programs that money is really funding

PeZook · Post by **PeZook** » 2008-07-21 09:11am

Stuart wrote:
hongi wrote:Unbelievable. Think how many up-armoured humvees that money could have bought...
Think how many black programs that money is really funding

Yeah! I mean, psychic teleportation research alone is probably gonna cost, like, a million bucks!

SirNitram · Post by **SirNitram** » 2008-07-21 09:28am

PeZook wrote:
Stuart wrote:
hongi wrote:Unbelievable. Think how many up-armoured humvees that money could have bought...
Think how many black programs that money is really funding
Yeah! I mean, psychic teleportation research alone is probably gonna cost, like, a million bucks!

Seven million per annum, as of the last time I found the records of such.

Shroom Man 777 · Post by **Shroom Man 777** » 2008-07-21 10:19am

Wait. These comfy chairs also cost seven (point six) million. Does this mean they're installing Cerebro into USAF aircraft?

MKSheppard · Post by **MKSheppard** » 2008-07-21 10:25am

Shroom Man 777 wrote:Wait. These comfy chairs also cost seven (point six) million. Does this mean they're installing Cerebro into USAF aircraft?

If you bothered to read the articul, it's not just comfty chairs. It's also supporting a fully encapsulated semi-meeting room, with what appears to be a sleeping rack next to it.

Comforty Chair Pallet.

Meeting Room Capsule.

FYI, that Map of the world really is a bitching 36" HDTV screen capabul of playing DVDs.

FedRebel · Post by **FedRebel** » 2008-07-21 10:56am

MKSheppard wrote: FYI, that Map of the world really is a bitching 36" HDTV screen capabul of playing DVDs.

Just DVD's? Those cheap bastards, Blu-Ray is where it's at

Shroom Man 777 · Post by **Shroom Man 777** » 2008-07-21 11:06am

@ Shep: I was making a quip on how the chairs' prices cost about as much as the psychic experiments Nitram mentioned, and how these chairs could possibly be the fruition of MK Ultra!

Still, I can't believe it costs millions to put a few couches and room-things and TVs and beds into a plane. Mang.

MKSheppard · Post by **MKSheppard** » 2008-07-21 11:13am

Shroom Man 777 wrote:and how these chairs could possibly be the fruition of MK Ultra!

Son, I'M the fruition of MK Ultra. Just look at my handle. MKSheppard.

Shroom Man 777 · Post by **Shroom Man 777** » 2008-07-21 11:16am

Some kind of US military meme-weapon to turn us all into ruthless genocidal warmongers? Eh, it still needs some work. All MK Sheppard's done is to instill within me a hypnotically suggested atomic homoeroticism

Shroom Man 777 · Post by **Shroom Man 777** » 2008-07-21 11:18am

Crap. I meant to hit 'preview' not 'submit'.

Also, it's funny how $7.6 million couldn't get that 'Meeting Room Capsule' a decent desktop computer! How will General Turgidson check his emails?

Post by **Darth Wong** » 2008-07-21 11:45am

Bigwig Syndrome. Happens in every large organization; the bigwigs always assign excessive resources to their own ego gratification. I've worked in places where requests for computer parts hit a brick wall but they're willing to spend fifty thousand dollars on a glass vanity display case for the foyer.

Shroom Man 777 · Post by **Shroom Man 777** » 2008-07-21 12:18pm

Well, I guess it's alright if these USAF Generals are amongst America's best and brightest, and are totally and completely professional and competent. Right?

At least it's a double-decker bed and not, like, a frickin' hotel suite straight out of an A380.

Sidewinder · Post by **Sidewinder** » 2008-07-26 12:00am

Stuart wrote:Think how many black programs that money is really funding

If that money is REALLY funding hypersonic bombers or some other black program, the USAF picked an incredibly stupid method of hiding its purpose. (I'd probably add a portion of the money to every damn R & D program they have, or inflate the number of gallons of jet fuel, bombs, MREs, or other expendables bought, to hide it.)

Shroom Man 777 wrote: At least it's a double-decker bed and not, like, a frickin' hotel suite straight out of an A380.

The USAF might as well order a couple of A380s, which are useful BEYOND stroking the generals' egos; the planes can fly a shitload of US military service members personnel to and from not-so-hotspots, e.g., to be UN peacekeepers.

Darwin · Post by **Darwin** » 2008-07-26 12:59am

hongi wrote:Unbelievable. Think how many up-armoured humvees that money could have bought...

the Air Force doesn't have much use for up-armored humvees.

Black programs? Nah. that's what $50,000 toilet seats and hammers are for. This, this is just stupid.

FedRebel · Post by **FedRebel** » 2008-07-26 01:20am

Sidewinder wrote:
Stuart wrote:Think how many black programs that money is really funding
If that money is REALLY funding hypersonic bombers or some other black program, the USAF picked an incredibly stupid method of hiding its purpose. (I'd probably add a portion of the money to every damn R & D program they have, or inflate the number of gallons of jet fuel, bombs, MREs, or other expendables bought, to hide it.)

Bur those ways are too obvious, the Air Force must 'appear' to be misappropriating its budget on leather recliners...

It's part the USAF's new strategy to appear as corrupt and incompetent as possible...because it can.

Don't you know the full recruiting slogan? "Do something amazing...ly lazy"

Shroom Man 777 wrote: At least it's a double-decker bed and not, like, a frickin' hotel suite straight out of an A380.
The USAF might as well order a couple of A380s, which are useful BEYOND stroking the generals' egos; the planes can fly a shitload of US military service members personnel to and from not-so-hotspots, e.g., to be UN peacekeepers.

How about 747-8's, one specifically assigned to each high ranking General, the aircraft could be called 'God of War', with each plane named after the War God of a polytheistic religion?