Freeform Infocom Game

[darthdavid]

OOC: Whatever one of you sociopaths ends up fighting the trolls better be careful not to torch the king, we need his fucking head!
IC: I thank him and retire to my room to sleep the sleep of the impure and lecherous.

[Questor]

You awake in the morning to see sunlight streaming through the windows. You find Sir Twit in the hall.

>|

[darthdavid]

Give Sir Twit his original name back.

[Questor]

Sir Twit renamed Sir Quinton Pablo McHenry, Junior, the Third, of Riverton.

OOC: Minor housekeeping. You no longer have powered armor, because I'm going to go back to something like the original plot now, and powered armor will just get you killed in gruesome ways. You have stormtrooper armor instead.

[JointStrikeFighter]

Find the kings 2IC and ask him about the King's public opinion levels.

[Questor]

The steward replies that the King is very popular, especially since the end of the civil war.

>|

[JointStrikeFighter]

Who was his opponent in the civil war

[Questor]

A former compatriot of his, who is now resting in pieces (at least two, head and body).

>|

[KrauserKrauser]

Tell WHORES to grab Steward while I insert the mind controlling eels.

Then scream "Khaaaaaaaaaan!"

[Questor]

The stewards guards stab you through the heart.

Reloading from last checkpoint...

A former compatriot of his, who is now resting in pieces (at least two, head and body).

>|

[darthdavid]

Mount WHORES and head out for the trolls!

[Questor]

As you head south, the weather gets colder. After four days of travel, you come to a small town.

>|

[darthdavid]

Find an inn in the town, order dinner (and ale, YAY!) and look up directions to the troll cave while I eat.
OOC:Are Trolls diurnal or nocturnal? I'd like to plan the attack for when they'll be least prepared.

[Questor]

The troll caves are still many days to the south, in the frozen wastes. As you eat, you are told stories of the land, along with one on the other side of the western mountains. The foreign land is a terrible place ruled by an autocratic king.

>|

[PainRack]

Ask for details on the autocratic king and relations with our king.

[Questor]

Our King despises the autocratic King, and the reverse holds true as well. The evil King believes that just by declaring something to be true, it is true. He once declared that autumn came two months sooner, and had farmers executed for not having their tithes ready.

>|

[darthdavid]

Locate the autocratic King's castle with google maps and see if it's closer or farther away from our current location than the troll cave.

[Questor]

It is across a mountain range, and MUCH farther away than the troll caves.

>|

[Erik von Nein]

Ask the Longsword to summon a space-based Ion Cannon and obliterate the evil king's castle.

[darthdavid]

Belay that order, you might destroy the loot.

[Questor]

OOC: You will be visiting his castle eventually.

The summons the Ion Cannon, but points out that you have no idea how to aim it.You

You ignore the sword and try to fire the Ion Cannon anyway, but you overload the capacitors, and simply create a very pretty light show in the sky.

>|

[JointStrikeFighter]

Confide in Sir Mary that you wish to overthrow the King in a bloodless soup; all smootherings.

[Questor]

Sir Mary is appalled, and tells you that he will have to stand against you if you do.

WHORES mentions that your unmentionables are looking tasty.

>|

[Erik von Nein]

Say "I said overturn his soup, hoping it wouldn't contain any blood. Silly companions."

Play "Macarenna" on laptop and make the skeleton dance to it.

[JointStrikeFighter]

Realise that you will either need to be more subtle in your coup plans or else MUCH MOE POWERFUL!