Freeform Infocom Game

[Questor]

You manage to escape from the dungeons.

You are in the entryway.

>|

[The Yosemite Bear]

looks around for good ways to start a fire and thus burn down the castle, all else fails , douse a gaurd in alcohol and dump him down the nearest privy, followed by a torch.

[Questor]

You have started a fire in the privy.

WHORES says, "Why are you wasting food? HAB will probably nuke this place until it grows very shortly."

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[The Yosemite Bear]

why would it grow?

then again burning the food will kill the toxic troll breeding bacteria.

[Questor]

"Sorry, I had a bit of bone in my beak, glows."

You exit the privy, and continue back to HAB lines.

Eventually, you find The Great Leader, along with his component commanders.

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[KrauserKrauser]

Present Lady BOB to the Great Leader

[Questor]

The great leader replies, "Good, now we can exterminate these foul Trekkies.

He speaks into a cell phone that he has summoned using the Sword of Logic.

A huge explosion destroys the fortress, and a large, mushroom shaped cloud is forming behind the Great Leader.

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[KrauserKrauser]

Bring up the subject up of promised upgrades to the Bone Throne and other random hardware related upgrades.

[The Yosemite Bear]

ask if anyone's found the Pitchfork of Paradox yet?

[Questor]

The HAB states that after they have completed the Objective Interim Light Repulsertank, they will move your priority from "Yeah, right, I'll get right on that." (Objective Interim Priority Class 5) to "Maybe, I'll think about it, when I get around to it." (OIPC 6). Currently there are 15,984,344,234,345,234,233 projects at the "Have it done yesterday, or you'll be in the work battalions by morning." (OIPC 542) catagory.

The Pitchfork of Paradox has not been found yet. That is one of the tasks at OIPC 542.

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[Hawkwings]

Ask for a nuclear-powered sidearm.

[The Yosemite Bear]

well all I know about the PoP is that it looks something like this:



and allegedly it's the anti-thesis of the Sword of Logic, and can "Pile it on Fast and Deep"

ok, that and it's capable of killing people's grandparents, or summoning monkeys with fanfic or possible slashfic ambitions....

[Questor]

Your request for a nuclear powered sidearm is put in at OIPC 1, and will be addressed as its priority code indicates.

Lady BOB says, "While all of this death and distruction is wonderful, I'd like to get out of here before they start using groundbursts to salt the earth."

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[The Yosemite Bear]

it's when they Pesto the earth that you really have to worry.

[KrauserKrauser]

Kill Lady BOB

[Enigma]

No. Don't kill her. Instead, tie her down and place her close enough to the nuke blasts so that the only harm she'll get is infertility and possibly cancer.

[Questor]

Your attempts to kill Lady BOB are interrupted by WHORES pointing out that you will probably be used as a test target for the Objective Interim Light Repulsortank if you do.

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[Erik von Nein]

Rename HAB "Trekkies."

[Questor]

You look up, and have the luck to see all of HAB's forces arrive, and proceed to introduce you to their various and sundry weapons.

Restoring from last checkpoint...

Your attempts to kill Lady BOB are interrupted by WHORES pointing out that you will probably be used as a test target for the Objective Interim Light Repulsortank if you do.

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[Erik von Nein]

Rename Lady BOB "Trekker", point this out to the HABites

[The Yosemite Bear]

kill protagonist, whores eats him, we restore from last save point.

[Hawkwings]

Return to Riverton with Lady BOB

[The Yosemite Bear]

oh good we're doing something productive, now hope that Riverton doesn't get harrassed by dragons upset with halfling/hobbit thieves, or orks, or elves....

much less finds it's self in a crossfire between all of the above and some pissed off dwarves.

[Questor]

You begin your return to Reverton.

WHORES asks, "Brian, I believe I am strong enough to carry all of us aloft, should we try to move a bit faster?"

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[The Yosemite Bear]

Cool, just NO BARREL ROLLS

oh and catching fish from the local lakes with a powerdive, is not suggested while we are on your back ok?