SPARTANS! TONIGHT, WE DINE IN BRUNSWICK!

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weemadando
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SPARTANS! TONIGHT, WE DINE IN BRUNSWICK!

Post by weemadando »

Ok, besides the obvious silliness of the editorial (by John Birmingham, the man behind the WW2.1/AoT series), what are peoples feelings on having a publicly funded statue of a figure from a nation other than your own being built?

My feelings on this are simple:
1) Leonidas was suitably awesome and is one of those guys who are on my carte-blanche for public monuments list (also includes Augustus, Hammurabi and
2) Melbourne has the second largest Greek population after Athens, so this statue might as well be in a Greek city (especially in Brunswick).
3) I have no problem with publicly funded art. And hopefully this bust will go ahead, be awesome and then I can post pics.
John Birmingham wrote:Haven't they heard? THIS IS SPARTA!
October 22, 2009 - 9:45AM

If King Leonidas had a grave, rather than just a glorious undying legend, he'd be spinning it. The most arse-kicking King of our most arse-kicking classical forebears wouldn't have let no bunch of uppity shop ladies get in his way. He'd have roared and stomped and kicked the nearest visiting diplomat in the tummy and sent him flying backwards screaming into a bottomless pit, all the while making damn sure that everyone knew, "THIS IS SPARTA!!!"

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I reckon we could do with some of that tummy-kicking action down in Brunswick at the moment, specifically at Sparta Place, where a veritable coven of frock merchants and dainty knick-knack sellers have jacked up at a proposal by the local council to erect a statue in honor of Leonidas and by extension the brave 300 who stood with him in the Hot Gates at the Battle of Thermopylae, delaying the advance of the so-called God King Xerxes, and buying enough time for the Greek city states to organise a stunning seaborne defence at Salamis, thereby securing the future for democracy and niceness.

God bollocks, I'll not have it I tell you! There should be statues of Leonidas everywhere! Not just in Sparta Place, Brunswick, but in Brisbane's Queen Street Mall, and on the Sydney Harbour Bridge, and outside the tuck shop of every primary school in the country, and somewhere prominent in your local RSL, perhaps at the entrance to the poker machine alcove, because that's how important Leonidas is.

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Cheesecloth ... it's no match for loincloth

Who the hell do these small-business women think they are? What on earth gives them the right to deny the rest of us the opportunity to doff our lids in quiet appreciation of noble Sparta and its slightly psychotic but undeniably very brave king for saving us from hordes of Xerxes's armoured battle elephants and black-clad sand ninjas? Do they imagine for a second they would have the freedom to sell their little cheesecloth bags of patchouli-scented potpourri and caged cooking pots (I'm working off the photo here) if Leonidas hadn't closed up the Hot Gates with the savagely hacked off arms and legs of Xerxes' warrior slaves?

Not only should the statue be built, but these terrible women's council fees should be jacked up about 10,000% to do it in solid gold.

Because THIS IS SPARTA!!!

Or Brunswick, that works for me too.
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Re: SPARTANS! TONIGHT, WE DINE IN BRUNSWICK!

Post by Edward Yee »

Augustus, Hammurabi, and...?

There's plenty of stuff in America named after non-Americans (beyond merely the Marquis de Lafayette), so I guess I'm not seeing the significance from an Australian perspective.
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Re: SPARTANS! TONIGHT, WE DINE IN BRUNSWICK!

Post by weemadando »

Pretty much anyone who's made a net positive contribution to the world.
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Re: SPARTANS! TONIGHT, WE DINE IN BRUNSWICK!

Post by PeZook »

So...the contributions of Leonidas were comparable to those of Augustus?

How?
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Re: SPARTANS! TONIGHT, WE DINE IN BRUNSWICK!

Post by Thanas »

Leonidas is a far less flattering figure once you dispell the propaganda surrounding him.
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Re: SPARTANS! TONIGHT, WE DINE IN BRUNSWICK!

Post by weemadando »

Thanas wrote:Leonidas is a far less flattering figure once you dispell the propaganda surrounding him.
One part of this that cannot be overlooked is that by building a statue of Leonidas we are tacitly endorsing homosexuality.

Oh yeah. And slavery. They always manage to leave that part out of the legends.
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Re: SPARTANS! TONIGHT, WE DINE IN BRUNSWICK!

Post by hongi »

Hammurabi in my opinion far outweighs Leonidas' importance, and I'd much rather see a statue of Pericles.

The pose should be suitably awesome...arm outstretched with sword in hand aimed at the street, a proud and cruel countenance looking out on his domain. And on Australia day, someone can tie an Australian flag around his neck as a cape. Yeah, lets go for it.
Last edited by hongi on 2009-10-22 05:57am, edited 2 times in total.
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Re: SPARTANS! TONIGHT, WE DINE IN BRUNSWICK!

Post by tim31 »

And late, late term abortian Ando.

That will never fly with the Hillsong set.
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Re: SPARTANS! TONIGHT, WE DINE IN BRUNSWICK!

Post by weemadando »

tim31 wrote:And late, late term abortian Ando.

That will never fly with the Hillsong set.
It's OK, they usually killed them once they were born. Which is fine with them, because unbaptised babies, just go to purgatory.
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Re: SPARTANS! TONIGHT, WE DINE IN BRUNSWICK!

Post by tim31 »

Jeez, what was I thinking? Of course a human being doesn't matter once it's passed the birth canal!

Are you a regular Blunty reader Ando, or just happened by? I've been following Birmingham's blog since Weapons of Choice(never commented or contributed).
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Re: SPARTANS! TONIGHT, WE DINE IN BRUNSWICK!

Post by Vympel »

Those chicks look like they belong on the Top 10 Most Wanted List for Fashion Criminals- it's like every god-awful woman's fashion, hairstyle, and cliched artsy-fartsy shopkeep in the world got together and formed the Superfriends.
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Re: SPARTANS! TONIGHT, WE DINE IN BRUNSWICK!

Post by weemadando »

tim31 wrote:Jeez, what was I thinking? Of course a human being doesn't matter once it's passed the birth canal!

Are you a regular Blunty reader Ando, or just happened by? I've been following Birmingham's blog since Weapons of Choice(never commented or contributed).
Yeah, I follow him. The Age is one of the few websites I can see at work. Plus I follow the Cheeseburger Gothic blog on Google Reader at home.

And btw - the best argument for why there should be a goddamn statue of Leonidas.

IT'S CALLED FUCKING SPARTA LANE.
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Re: SPARTANS! TONIGHT, WE DINE IN BRUNSWICK!

Post by Gramzamber »

So put up a statue of Menelaus.
Yeah both are Spartan thugs, but at least Menelaus was in a great ancient epic while Leonidas is an overrated twat.
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Re: SPARTANS! TONIGHT, WE DINE IN BRUNSWICK!

Post by Mayabird »

For irony value, I would recommend a statue of Epaminondas instead. Better human being and example for people to live to anyway.
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Re: SPARTANS! TONIGHT, WE DINE IN BRUNSWICK!

Post by Thanas »

I am not sure any ancient war leader would make a good role model today.
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