USS Missouri Vs Waffle Iron

Utsanomiko · Post by **Utsanomiko** » 2003-02-13 07:52pm

USS Missouri (before being decommisioned)

Designated crew: 1,851 officers and men
Length: 270.4 metres
Beam: 32.98 metres
Draft: 11.58 metres
Height: 63.9 metres
Displacement: 41,000 tonnes (empty), 53,000 tonnes (full)
Power: 212,000 s.h.p. from four turbines
Maximum speed: 32 knots (with 10,584 gallons of fuel burned per hour)
Armament: 9 of 16" (406 mm) in three turrets; 20 of 5" (127 mm); 80 of 40 mm Bofors; 60 of 20mm Oerlikons, 32 of Tomahawk missile launchers; 16 of Harpoon missile launchers; 4 of CIWS 20 mm turrets.

And it's opponent...

Black & Decker Waffle Iron

Your typical 120-volt waffle-maker.
Estimated weight is a couple of pounds.
Makes a batch of four fluffy, golden brown waffles in minutes. Yummy.

Using the proper evidence and support, you may argue for/against either one succeeding in whatever situation you choose to present.
Have fun, and may the best machine win!!!

Post by **Darth Wong** » 2003-02-13 07:53pm

You're weird.

XaLEv · Post by **XaLEv** » 2003-02-13 07:55pm

Did you post this here on purpose or accidently?

Utsanomiko · Post by **Utsanomiko** » 2003-02-13 07:55pm

Hey, it's just my response to all these damn crazy vs threads. You people want a battle? I'll show you a battle!!!!

Xenophobe3691 · Post by **Xenophobe3691** » 2003-02-13 07:59pm

That is just...BAD.

Xenophobe3691 · Post by **Xenophobe3691** » 2003-02-13 08:00pm

Damn, double post.

Macross · Post by **Macross** » 2003-02-13 08:01pm

um, the Waffle Iron, all the way.

Cant eat a battleship....

Howedar · Post by **Howedar** » 2003-02-13 08:01pm

The Battleship fires any or all of its weapons and destroys the waffle iron.

Battleship wins.

Nathan F · Post by **Nathan F** » 2003-02-13 08:02pm

The battleship runs over the waffle iron and it procedes to chop it up in its screws.

Stormbringer · Post by **Stormbringer** » 2003-02-13 08:03pm

Well, there goes another into the loony bin.

DPDarkPrimus · Post by **DPDarkPrimus** » 2003-02-13 08:07pm

The Missouri has been decomissioned. The waffle iron is still in use. GG, waffle iron.

Post by **Colonel Olrik** » 2003-02-13 08:09pm

Oh, for fucks sake. We have an entire forum to troll. Don't do it here!

XaLEv · Post by **XaLEv** » 2003-02-13 08:11pm

Spam. Thread locked.

........oh......damn......

Wicked Pilot · Post by **Wicked Pilot** » 2003-02-13 08:12pm

The George Forman Grill takes them all!

jaeger115 · Post by **jaeger115** » 2003-02-13 08:13pm

The Missouri's kitchens can outproduce that puny waffle iron. While the iron only makes waffles, the Missouri can make salads, steaks, soup, and cookies.

Utsanomiko · Post by **Utsanomiko** » 2003-02-13 08:14pm

Colonel Olrik wrote:Oh, for fucks sake. We have an entire forum to troll. Don't do it here!

This is a serrious debate; just as serrious as, say, that old "Skynet vs Middle Earth" thread, or some of the other ones goin on.

Anywho, as for my $.03?

The waffle iron makes scrumptious waffles, and can be used conveniently in the home. The Missouri's galley is too large to utilize in a residential situation. Black & Decker wins this round.

So, does anyone want to argue that you can sink/sabotage the Missouri using a 3-pound aluminum waffle iron?

Post by **Colonel Olrik** » 2003-02-13 08:16pm

on second thought, just avoid the spam.

Arthur_Tuxedo · Post by **Arthur_Tuxedo** » 2003-02-13 08:42pm

This should be in the Trek vs. Wars forum, after all, it's a pretty perfect analogy for the chance a GCS has against an ISD

Utsanomiko · Post by **Utsanomiko** » 2003-02-13 08:45pm

I was going to put it in SLaM, but I didn't want to specifically limit the discussion to purely technical aspects.

Stormbringer · Post by **Stormbringer** » 2003-02-13 08:51pm

Darth Utsanomiko wrote:The waffle iron makes scrumptious waffles, and can be used conveniently in the home. The Missouri's galley is too large to utilize in a residential situation. Black & Decker wins this round.

But you can just live on the Missouri so ha! Take that.

paladin · Post by **paladin** » 2003-02-13 08:51pm

I would say the Battleship. One of her cooks from the gallery could use a screw driver to take the waffle iron apart.

Post by **Beowulf** » 2003-02-13 08:52pm

The waffle iron! You can bean the officers over the head with it!

Post by **fgalkin** » 2003-02-13 09:06pm

Waffle iron takes this easily.

All hail the mighty waffles of Doom!

Have a very nice day.
-fgalkin

Utsanomiko · Post by **Utsanomiko** » 2003-02-13 09:14pm

Waffle Iron retails for $63.95. Missouri is worth millions, at the least. Waffle-Iron is more economically feasible. Waffle iron wins.

Post by **Sea Skimmer** » 2003-02-13 10:04pm

NF_Utvol wrote:The battleship runs over the waffle iron and it procedes to chop it up in its screws.

Which have several blades warped and pitted by the impacts. This caused massive vibrations, breaking the shaft seals and damaging the turbines and reduction gears. The chain reaction wipes out ¼ of the vessels power train and floods several compartments.