Hovind's Doctoral Thesis now available online

[wautd]

For anyone who'd like a good laught (or cry), you can download it here.

[adam_grif]

This amuses me a great deal.

I'll be sure to read through it later, although I doubt I'll be able to stomach too much of it.

[TheFeniX]

Aren't these supposed to be a bit more professional reading than "I personally believe?"

Anyways, the way he just makes up connections between Satan creating Evolution to spit us all and that Cain tried to "evolve closer to God," he could be writing about anything. Seriously, he just takes references out of the bible and says "that means evolution sucks."

Here's a perfect example of his logic:
Evolution is born of pride.
Ham laughed at his father's nakedness.
People always "cutting down" others do so out of pride.
Ham's son was cursed due to his father's pride.

And that's it. It goes on to another paragraph. I assume he thinks "evolutionists" are cursed for their pride, but there's really no unifying thought.

I like this quote: "Why don't we have people writing about kings that lived 50,000 years ago?" Correct me if I'm wrong, but this is like asking "why aren't there records of people sending and receiving e-mails 200 years ago?"

[Thanas]

How I would write a dissertation if I were Kent Hovind:

- read only one book
- do not use proof or logic
- call everyone who disagrees with me a prideful sinner

Why is this even allowed? In Germany one would be hauled before the courts for such fraudulent work.

[Simon_Jester]

Having read the link, but wanting to see some kind of well-written (better-written than the wiki article, anyway) answer for the record:

Who is this Hovind person, and why are they relevant enough to be name-dropped? Also, how did they get a doctoral degree from what I infer claims to be an accredited institution, and why is this institution able to maintain its claim in the face of granting a doctoral degree to a man who wouldn't survive thirty seconds in front of any thesis attack* committee I've ever seen?

*It stands to reason that if what the student is doing is a thesis defense, then the committee is doing a thesis attack...

Why is this even allowed? In Germany one would be hauled before the courts for such fraudulent work.

Do you mean that Hovind would be hauled before the courts for writing an paper full of nonsense, or that his alma mater would be hauled before the courts for granting a degree on such a flimsy basis?

[Duckie]

His institution is not accredited. Here's a picture of it, just for laughs-


It's also, as you can tell by the lack of classrooms or people, a school-by-mail, so you can imagine how good it'd be even if they weren't a diploma mill for evangelicals.

[Thanas]

Why is this even allowed? In Germany one would be hauled before the courts for such fraudulent work.

Do you mean that Hovind would be hauled before the courts for writing an paper full of nonsense, or that his alma mater would be hauled before the courts for granting a degree on such a flimsy basis?

Both.

His institution is not accredited. Here's a picture of it, just for laughs-
*snip picture*
It's also, as you can tell by the lack of classrooms or people, a school-by-mail, so you can imagine how good it'd be even if they weren't a diploma mill for evangelicals.

Thank God unaccredited schools are not allowed where I live.

[Serafina]

Well, technically he would be hauled to a court for claiming to be a doctor without being one.

And even if you had complete ignorance of the whole subject and never even heard of evolution, you can not fail to notice that this guy is not the brightest bulb in the room. I have seen better "papers" (just essays, of course) by 16-year olds.

[Serafina]

Ghetto edit:

[quote=" "Phony Doctor" (PhD) Hovind in his (piece of) paper"]...but i must in the final analysis, take the blame/credit for what is written in this book.[/quote]

Well, i think nothing needs to be added to that statement.

[Ryushikaze]

Is there another place besides the given link to see this totty? I don't want to wait until the 6th to get a look, as the site has apparently suspended activity til then.

[Setzer]

His thesis starts off like the introduction to a novel. It seems that he managed to graduate by kissing the right asses and towing the Creationist party line.

[Serafina]

His thesis starts off like the introduction to a novel. It seems that he managed to graduate by kissing the right asses and towing the Creationist party line.

No, he graduated by paying money to a non-accredited diploma-mill. Being a vocal Idiot Creationist propably helped, too, but i doubt that he did even a shred of serious work - including bowing down to kiss asses.

[Ritterin Sophia]

Who is this Hovind person, and why are they relevant enough to be name-dropped?

Kent Hovind aka "Dr Dino", is an Evangelical Christian and the source and perpetuator of a number of creationist bits of logic. He was also the creator of the creastionist themepark 'Dinosaur Adventure Land' and was convicted of tax evasion for his failure to pay income taxes. He attempted to argue that his themepark and such were tax exempt because they were part of his church.

[Norseman]

There's a lengthy sporking online if anyone is interested. It's in 15 parts so far. As for myself I have to say that "I am Kent Hovind, I live in Pensacola Florida" does not strike as how one begins a doctoral thesis, forgive me if you English speakers do things differently but I was always told that when it came to college level papers "The word 'I' should only occur in quotations".

Obviously though the Patriot Bible University is a wonderful refuge for the sort of people who tend to seek refuge in patriotism. I went over their curriculum and it seems to skip from introductory courses to stuff like Surviving the Economic Meltdown and Writing an Historical Novel which for some inexplicable reason is a 605 level couirse... I'm only assuming that the number in front is the grade of English comprehension you need to take the class.

[Instant Sunrise]

Here is an OCR'ed version of his dissertation to peruse: (thanks Norseman)

Hello, my name is Kent Hovind. I am a creation/science evangelist.

This piece of shit reads like a D-grade term paper that wouldn't be acceptable at the high school level. Other than that, it's the usual shit of trying to link Evolution to Social Darwinism and Nazism.

Most of the programs on television are examples of Hollywood’s definite desire to discredit Christianity. You will not see a preacher portrayed as a God-fearing man. You will see him portrayed as a wild-eyed fanatic killing people, or stealing money from the church or some other evil deed. You will never see the truth in the Hollywood movies about Christianity. There is a deliberate war being waged against religion in general and Christianity in particular.

Good thing he cited scholarly sourced and specific examples of this.

Also, what does this tangent have to do with the thesis statement. For that matter, what the hell is the thesis statement.

The earth’s magnetic field is declining. Dr. Thomas G. Barnes, a professor of physics at the University of Texas in El Paso, claims that the earth’s declining magnetic field is a powerful indication that the earth is extremely young. He is considered by many to be one of the world’s experts on the subject. His studied opinion is that this bit of scientific data would limit the earth’s age to less than 25,000 years.

Again, no citation for this. Just a name, and a paraphrase. I have no idea when or where this person said this. Was it in a peer-reviewed article for a journal? Did he say this in a lecture? Was it when he was getting shitfaced with grad students in a bar? I DON'T FUCKING KNOW.

[Questor]

There's a lengthy sporking online if anyone is interested. It's in 15 parts so far. As for myself I have to say that "I am Kent Hovind, I live in Pensacola Florida" does not strike as how one begins a doctoral thesis, forgive me if you English speakers do things differently but I was always told that when it came to college level papers "The word 'I' should only occur in quotations".

Nope, that's the same instruction that I always got for any academic paper.

EDIT:

Here's a passage from a eulogy of the aformentioned Thomas G. Barnes

Other credentials: Served four years as President of the Creation Research Society; Chairman of the Textbook
Committee for BIOLOGY, A Search For Order in Complexity (Zondervan); Chairman of the Committee on
Openness in Science. It was signed by more than 700 creationist scientist; Served on the Editorial Board of the
science Journal Galilean Electrodynamics.

[Akhlut]

There's a lengthy sporking online if anyone is interested. It's in 15 parts so far. As for myself I have to say that "I am Kent Hovind, I live in Pensacola Florida" does not strike as how one begins a doctoral thesis, forgive me if you English speakers do things differently but I was always told that when it came to college level papers "The word 'I' should only occur in quotations".

To expand a little on what Jason said, what I've always been taught about writing academic papers is to write without ever referencing one's self in the paper. One is always to be refered to as 'one' or 'the researcher' or some other similar title/noun and to let the results be the main focus. The author is always supposed to be treated as the least important part of the work, as s/he is supposed to be the facilitator between the facts they are working with and the world at large. The focus is always on the facts and what is done with them (statistics, analyses, conclusions, etc.).

[Serafina]

There's a lengthy sporking online if anyone is interested. It's in 15 parts so far. As for myself I have to say that "I am Kent Hovind, I live in Pensacola Florida" does not strike as how one begins a doctoral thesis, forgive me if you English speakers do things differently but I was always told that when it came to college level papers "The word 'I' should only occur in quotations".

To expand a little on what Jason said, what I've always been taught about writing academic papers is to write without ever referencing one's self in the paper. One is always to be refered to as 'one' or 'the researcher' or some other similar title/noun and to let the results be the main focus. The author is always supposed to be treated as the least important part of the work, as s/he is supposed to be the facilitator between the facts they are working with and the world at large. The focus is always on the facts and what is done with them (statistics, analyses, conclusions, etc.).

You know, that's because scientists do not operate on appeals to authority, and (ideally) do not care about who the writer of a paper is at all.
Creationism, on the other hand, RUNS on an appeal to authority.