Halo Legends *lots of spoilers*

SF: discuss futuristic sci-fi series, ideas, and crossovers.

Moderator: NecronLord

User avatar
Darksider
Sith Acolyte
Posts: 5271
Joined: 2002-12-13 02:56pm
Location: America's decaying industrial armpit.

Re: Halo Legends *lots of spoilers*

Post by Darksider »

ok, since i've finally seen this, I can comment on it.

The Good:
1. The music. The Halo soundtrack is utilized very well, and the original track they use for "Origins" is pretty cool. The only time that the music is underwhelming is in "the package," but i'll comment on that later.

2. "Prototype." This is one of the few shorts that I liked. The armor fucking up the covenant's shit was pretty awesome, and It doesn't seem too out of place for Halo Canon (no, not even the wanktastic self-destruct, since we know the UNSC can make football sized thirty megaton nukes), since we know that the UNSC can seriously ruin the Covies shit on the ground, they just get their asses kicked in space. I probably would have liked it more if they hadn't made the main character so angsty, and just made him sacrifice himself to get his platoon off-planet, but for some reason Anime has to take itself so goddamn seriously.

3. "odd one out." This is a hilarious parody. It's funny as hell, and that's all that really needs to be said.

The Bad:

1. "Origins." The music in this was great, but the short itself ranged from boring to wall banging stupid. I knew the forerunners lost the war with the flood because they were idiots, but that wierd laser-axe thing their ships used was just fucking retarded. Also, sending a five-man team to destroy a major flood spore is retarded, and the results are easily predicted. (hint: they all die) The second short was a little better, but i'd have preferred if they used a shot of actual spartan armor in the "human history" flashback rather than the spartans from "300." Also, while the part at the end that shows humans and covenant races fighting together against the flood looks cool, It's completely non-canon. Seriously, it shows Humans, elites, jackals, Grunds, and brutes, all fighting the flood together. Nothing like that ever happened in the games. ever.

2. "The Duel." This short was just bad. Really fucking bad. I couldn't even watch it all the way through. the animation is almost painful to watch, and the samuri-fication of elite culture is fucking annoying. The last thing sci-fi needs is another goddamn warrior race.

3. "The Package." This short is wanktastic bullshit. It's like someone had an Idea to do this as the parody short instead of "odd one out" and someone told them to do it with a straight face instead. Unlike the armor in "prototype," the booster frames are completely unbelievable wank. All throughout the games and the books, we are told that humanity is loosing the war because they cannot match the covenant's technology in space, and here we see a squad of spartans use giant, shielded jet-bikes to blow gigantic holes in covenant warships whose shields are down because..... Hey look! A spartan doing a death blossom in a warship's hanger! :roll:. The UNSC's apparent possession of a stealth ship that shoots lasers also clashes with the established setting a bit. As for the spartans, their wanktastic charge through the covenant warship is exactly how spartans don't fight. The books go out of their way to show spartans fighting tactically, using cover, and advancing under cover fire at every opportunity. Here, they just rush through pulling a bunch of gun-kata bullshit. So after all the running and gun kata-ing, the chief rushes in to find a cryotube containing...... Dr. Halsey's younger sister? Seriously. At this point in the timeline this woman is supposed to be in her mid-forties or early fifties. She's constantly described as a motherly figure to the spartans, and here she's portrayed as a fucking blonde bombshell? So the chief brings stripper-Halsey to the escape pods, only to be cut off by a pissed off red armored elite. He empties his MA5C harmelessly into his energy sword rather than attempting to vary his aim because everyone in this short has terminal retard-itis, and they duel. And by duel I mean "spastically swing their swords around like Jedi even though they aren't." Anyways, Shipmaster dickhead beams the red guy out and detatches that section of the ship to go to slipspace. The chief escapes with not-Halsey, and laments that he needs to become stronger because the writers feel the need to shoehorn in one last tired anime cliche. This is easily the worst short of the entire collection. I was rolling my eyes the entire fucking time I was watching this. It combines every cliche I despise about halo with every cliche I despise about anime into a festering pile of suck.
And this is why you don't watch anything produced by Ronald D. Moore after he had his brain surgically removed and replaced with a bag of elephant semen.-Gramzamber, on why Caprica sucks
User avatar
Ritterin Sophia
Sith Acolyte
Posts: 5496
Joined: 2006-07-25 09:32am

Re: Halo Legends *lots of spoilers*

Post by Ritterin Sophia »

Darksider wrote:It doesn't seem too out of place for Halo Canon
So power armor usable by normal humans that allows the occupant to rack up a kill ratio so high in such a short time that it would make Master Chief blush makes sense in a Halo where the total price of training and equipping a single Spartan can rival that of an entire warship?
A Certain Clique, HAB, The Chroniclers
User avatar
CaptHawkeye
Sith Devotee
Posts: 2939
Joined: 2007-03-04 06:52pm
Location: Korea.

Re: Halo Legends *lots of spoilers*

Post by CaptHawkeye »

Halo Legends strikes me as something written for the writer's sake. They must know that Halo's fanbase is primarily made up of casual frat jocks who have precisely zero interest in the storyline, and won't be caught DEAD buying an anime series. So they wrote a series which every word on the script can be boiled down to;

Master Chief: WANK WANK WANK.

Marine: WANK WANK WANK?!!

Master Chief: WANK WANK! WANK!

Then they mailed the script to some studios in Japan. Studios who had no interest in working on this project. Why would the writers do this? Because it's awesome, to THEM. And the pitiful number of fanboy nerds who will buy ANYTHING with a brand name on it.

People have bought the books apparently, but books are dirt cheap to write and publish. None of them need to sell much to justify their cost. The marketing department must love knowing that.
Best care anywhere.
User avatar
Darksider
Sith Acolyte
Posts: 5271
Joined: 2002-12-13 02:56pm
Location: America's decaying industrial armpit.

Re: Halo Legends *lots of spoilers*

Post by Darksider »

General Schatten wrote:
Darksider wrote:It doesn't seem too out of place for Halo Canon
So power armor usable by normal humans that allows the occupant to rack up a kill ratio so high in such a short time that it would make Master Chief blush makes sense in a Halo where the total price of training and equipping a single Spartan can rival that of an entire warship?
Honestly, it looks similar to the power armors in Halo Wars, which are usable by normal humans rather than spartans. As for the massive kill ratio, it's standard action movie "go out with a bang" style stuff. Didn't seem too wankish, at least not compared to the penis compensator spaceships the spartans used in "the package." It looks like they just took the Halo Wars utility suits and bolted on a bunch of guns and a nuke.
And this is why you don't watch anything produced by Ronald D. Moore after he had his brain surgically removed and replaced with a bag of elephant semen.-Gramzamber, on why Caprica sucks
User avatar
Ford Prefect
Emperor's Hand
Posts: 8254
Joined: 2005-05-16 04:08am
Location: The real number domain

Re: Halo Legends *lots of spoilers*

Post by Ford Prefect »

Darksider wrote:for some reason Anime has to take itself so goddamn seriously.
I hate to say it, but I laughed pretty hard. We're talking about the Halo franchise, after all, which has turned taking itself too seriously into a form of art. Remember the unironic 'Believe' marketing campaign, trying to inject the gravitas and symbolism of some kind of messianic demi-god into a big green robot who is as dumb as he is bland? This is even setting aside that the head of the Legends project has pretty much said that pretty much every script was given to the studios and mostly unaltered.
What is Project Zohar?

Here's to a certain mostly harmless nutcase.
Post Reply