Bayonetta: What the fuck was that?

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Vympel
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Bayonetta: What the fuck was that?

Post by Vympel »

Unskippable does Bayonetta's intro

What the fuck is this game even about? It looks fucking stupid. I never heard of it until a few weeks before it came out as if it was highly anticipated (I discovered after that for some reason people had been cos-playing the 'character' for a good time before the game ever came out, go figure).

This easily is on my top ten list of worst intros of all time. Its got it all - its incomprehensible, its boring, its stupid, and the music sucks ass.
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Re: Bayonetta: What the fuck was that?

Post by Andrew_Fireborn »

It's by the same guy responsible for Devil May Cry.

I believe Yahtzee mentioned that it's incomprehensible the whole way through for at least 2 playthroughs...
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Re: Bayonetta: What the fuck was that?

Post by Stark »

It's not incomprehensible (turns out Yahztee is a comedy writer, shock) it's just boring and stupid. I expected a barrage of over the top strangeness, but I got a platformer with a JRPG story. Snooze.
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Re: Bayonetta: What the fuck was that?

Post by Sinewmire »

That was just... awful. Really really awful.

We'd have mainstream 3d modelling since quake, and they still can't get a fat guy to look even vaguely realistic in a cutscene?
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Re: Bayonetta: What the fuck was that?

Post by white_rabbit »

You've seen the main character right ?

Do you seriously think they give a fuck about a realistic body image for literally any character in this game ? (most games)

I don't think that was even the entire intro, isn't there another couple of minutes of shit after that ?
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Re: Bayonetta: What the fuck was that?

Post by SylasGaunt »

Bayonetta as a whole is built off being over the top and crazy. The intro is basically the low point of the crazy and from there it goes higher.

Though I don't get why people claim the plot is incomprehensible. It's a little confusing as you advance due to some temporal screwiness but it's not that difficult to get.
What the fuck is this game even about? It looks fucking stupid. I never heard of it until a few weeks before it came out as if it was highly anticipated (I discovered after that for some reason people had been cos-playing the 'character' for a good time before the game ever came out, go figure).
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Re: Bayonetta: What the fuck was that?

Post by Vendetta »

I really don't think anyone pays attention to the story of Bayonetta, it's really just an excuse to kill a whole lot of stuff with over the top weapons and moves.

On the other hand, the actual game is far and away the best representation of its genre, it's got all the over the top craziness of Devil May Cry and God Hand, and the fluidity, variety of weapons and moves, and precision of Ninja Gaiden.

For anyone who wants more out of a beat em up than "Ug, Kratos Smash" it's the go-to game.
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Re: Bayonetta: What the fuck was that?

Post by Stark »

I've played uninspired God of War ripoffs that were more fun and more interesting than Bayonetta. 'Do same thing 15,000 time then experience a boring cutscene' is a genre that sucks.
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Re: Bayonetta: What the fuck was that?

Post by SAMAS »

No First-Person Shooters for you, then? :-P

* Nothing against FPS', but they really do look like that to non-fans of the genre, and... frankly, you walked right into that one (or a similar joke). :mrgreen:
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Re: Bayonetta: What the fuck was that?

Post by SAMAS »

*shrugs* I dunno, I've never played Bayonetta.

But seriously, I've been having a surprising amount of fun with Dynasty Warriors Gundam 2, so that may not necessarily be true.
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Re: Bayonetta: What the fuck was that?

Post by Stark »

Sigh. I've played ever DW game there is. Protip: the repetitive play is weak but DW has more to the game to retain interest. Bayonetta has a story nowhere NEAR as strange or outrageous as it wants to be and that's IT. You should play it to see what 'style over substance' looks like when the style tries really hard but sucks.
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Re: Bayonetta: What the fuck was that?

Post by Oskuro »

Stark wrote:Don't be butthurt. A fighting game where you use the same combo over and over is shit.
As in all of them? :roll:


Funny thing, the spanish word for dishcloth is Bayeta, wich is what I keep thinking of when I see the game's title (I should be thinking of Bayoneta, spanish for Bayonet, but her hair does make her more of a flailing dishrag).
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Re: Bayonetta: What the fuck was that?

Post by Edward Yee »

Sigh. I've played ever DW game there is. Protip: the repetitive play is weak but DW has more to the game to retain interest.
I'm guessing part of it is the story actually existing?
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Re: Bayonetta: What the fuck was that?

Post by Mr. Tickle »

I enjoyed the game quite a bit actually, call it personal preference but the almost jarring mash up of styles/themes going on dragged me along quite nicely. I'd agree with others, the combat itself can be repetitive but then the grading score system seems to be set up in a way to push for multiple playthroughs to perfect it. You can get through it with mashing tactics, but I think to get the best scores you have to really use the other moves/weapons depending on the mob/boss/whatever you are fighting.

I have to say though the seemingly endless ride on top of that bloody missile has been one of the most stressful video game experiences I've had in awhile.
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Re: Bayonetta: What the fuck was that?

Post by Stark »

Who gives a fuck about scores? It's just a cheap way to build play time without actually adding content.

'Spawn 5 enemies'
'Enemies are killed the same way'
'Walk to next area'
'Watch pretentious yet boring cutscene'

THRILLING.

DW at least has lots of stuff happening, another level with customising, multiple characters and approaches, etc.
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Re: Bayonetta: What the fuck was that?

Post by Mr. Tickle »

I'll not argue with you, I'm just saying that was one the ways Beyonetta seemingly has been designed and developed.

You may not like that style of gameplay (heck I don't, I don't plan to play through it again) but then again some people do.

The other part of this game is the, erm.. "background", the overall theme to it, for me it is unashamedly bonkers in it's style. Like I said, just a theme I quite like.
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Re: Bayonetta: What the fuck was that?

Post by Stark »

The background is nowhere NEAR as 'bonkers' as people want it to be. If it was a boring beat em up over a David Lynch film, that would have been way better than what we got. I expected to be confronted by a barrage of amusing or confusing things, but instead it's quite mundane and uninteresting.
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Re: Bayonetta: What the fuck was that?

Post by Vendetta »

Stark wrote:Who gives a fuck about scores?
People who play Bayonetta?

The game was designed to be played for scores, that's why it is broken up into small independently rated encounters. That may not be what you want from a game, but that doesn't mean it's not a valid game design objective.
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Re: Bayonetta: What the fuck was that?

Post by Mr. Tickle »

The background is nowhere NEAR as 'bonkers' as people want it to be. If it was a boring beat em up over a David Lynch film, that would have been way better than what we got. I expected to be confronted by a barrage of amusing or confusing things, but instead it's quite mundane and uninteresting.
Fair enough, sadly the rest of us are not as educated in the way of "bonkers" as your good self. :)
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Re: Bayonetta: What the fuck was that?

Post by Stark »

No shit. If someone makes a glorified space invaders game and expects people to not notice because of a lame story, they should expect criticism.

PS constantly breaking up the game with stupid 'walk around and explore' sections was pretty dumb, but self-indulgent (which describes the game pretty well). It's amusing that despite serious buzz pre-release the game sank pretty fast; there's no meat beyond 'get a better score'.
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