Xenomorphs in Hogwarts

[Srelex]

One night, around the events of the fifth book, an Alien Queen and several warriors are placed in the Chamber of Secrets, with the exit marked out for them. Once several eggs are laid, they head off to find some people to get facehugged. Or, as an alternate scenario, a dozen warriors are placed randomly around the complex. How would the students and staff react and fare?

[Zixinus]

Badly. While I believe that Hogwarts has enough internal security to make the threat containable and able to be eliminated, several of the students will get caught and killed.

One solid line of defense are the ghosts: they cannot be killed, the xenomorps can't do shit to them and they should be able to follow the xenomorphs wherever they would go.

Facehuggers could be a different story. Other children will notice that there is a weird thing attached to one of their classmate's head and will call the teachers. Once a chest is bursted, the teachers will sound the alarm.

The real question is how fast could the threat be detected and how soon will Dumbledore (is he still alive by the way? I am very fuzzy on the books, I've read them quite a long time ago) call evacuation of the premises. Once that happens, the only question is how soon can the wizards clean up the place.

Then again, this is the same school where they allowed teaching to go on despite the fact that there was a giant snake-thing killing children.

[ray245]

One night, around the events of the fifth book, an Alien Queen and several warriors are placed in the Chamber of Secrets, with the exit marked out for them. Once several eggs are laid, they head off to find some people to get facehugged. Or, as an alternate scenario, a dozen warriors are placed randomly around the complex. How would the students and staff react and fare?

What's the point of asking this? To know how badly a bunch of students will be killed by the xenomorphs?

[Samuel]

The real question is how fast could the threat be detected and how soon will Dumbledore (is he still alive by the way? I am very fuzzy on the books, I've read them quite a long time ago) call evacuation of the premises. Once that happens, the only question is how soon can the wizards clean up the place.

It is from book 5 so yes, he lives. I can imagine the school getting shut down on the grounds that it is too dangerous (this is when the Ministry is trying to shut it down). Alternatively, the xenomorphs can't leave the chamber (sheer walls to the exit which needs the ability to speak snake) and so starve.

[Tritio]

Burn the heretic! Kill the mutant! Purge the unclean!

Anyway, the students rapidly get slaughtered at the start of the incursion. A few might try and fight, but I doubt the magical prowess of all but the older students and teachers. They would probably flee to their House Dorms or Great hall, where they will cower. I wonder if the Marauders Map could be used to monitor the Xenos and aid the students. After some order is made of the whole mess, the Ministry of Magic would be contacted and Aurors would probably be dispatched to the scene. Then it's time for mop up and a large reaction from the parents and other parts of the Magical community.

[Vendetta]

One night, around the events of the fifth book, an Alien Queen and several warriors are placed in the Chamber of Secrets, with the exit marked out for them. Once several eggs are laid, they head off to find some people to get facehugged. Or, as an alternate scenario, a dozen warriors are placed randomly around the complex. How would the students and staff react and fare?

What's the point of asking this? To know how badly a bunch of students will be killed by the xenomorphs?

Considering the way the Xenos are generally considered as a weakass non-threat to any vaguely competent and prepared adversary, I think it's more along the lines of "find something the Xenos don't lose too horribly to". Schoolchildren, then.

[Zixinus]

Besides the ghosts, what other security measures are there in the school?

I recall that the suits of armor are sentient, and they once guided Harry around Hogwarts (when Harry wanted to go somewhere). I wonder whether they could double as fighting force when necessary.

I recall that Hagrid is out of the school by book five. I don't recall his replacement nor what creatures he keeps. Does anyone know whether there are any creatures that could go toe-to-toe with a xenomorph?

[The Romulan Republic]

It is from book 5 so yes, he lives. I can imagine the school getting shut down on the grounds that it is too dangerous (this is when the Ministry is trying to shut it down). Alternatively, the xenomorphs can't leave the chamber (sheer walls to the exit which needs the ability to speak snake) and so starve.

Except the Ministry wasn't trying to shut it down, just take it over. Though its true this will give them a nice pretext to boot Dumbledore.

As for how the Xenomorphs would fair, well, I have to agree that the school is unlikely to be closed immediately, based on The Chamber of Secrets and the political situation at this time (almost the last thing Dumbledore would want to do is admit the situation is out of control and shut down the school which is basically his only remaining power base at this point, due to struggles with the Ministry, while the Ministry would want to keep it open to maintain the appearance that everything is under control).

That said, I think the wizards, once they know what's going on, will probably be able to contain the situation. As someone already pointed out, the Marauder's Map could possibly track the aliens (can it track animals or just people?), and the wizards might even be able to remove a facehugger pretty easily (say, transfigure the facehugger into something harmless). Killing the adult Xenos is going to be harder, as their aren't that many at Hogwarts who are trained in combat, and even fewer who are experienced in combat. Maybe a half-dozen teachers and some of the older students, though this situation improves later in the year thanks to Harry and the DA training a bunch of students. That said, there's no reason to think stunners won't put them down, and their are various other immobilizing spells. As of the end of Book Five, there are probably about fifty people at Hogwarts who know that stuff well enough to give a Xenomorph trouble. Some people (Snape and Dumbledore at least) could probably use Avada Kedavra on them, and I doubt the law would care as these are non-humans and of a questionable intelligence level.

If the situation isn't quickly contained, though, it probably won't matter what Dumbledore does, because the Ministry will be notified and the Aurors will be called in.

[Themightytom]

I don't know that this would be a bloodbath on the students parts, the xenomorphs have no defense against magic, so even the beginning students could hex them enough to disorient while making escape or calling for help. Virtually ALL of the students have wands, and are essentially better armed than anyone short of the space marines we've seen in the movies.

Although I did have an intriguing idea, if the xenomorphs take on the physical characteristics of their hosts such as the dog alien in the third movie, does that mean they could erupt from a student either resistant to magic, or wielding some kind of primitive instinctual form? What if one face hugged a basilisk?

[Zixinus]

The other issue, is the houseelves. They can teleport on will and will notice the aliens walking around. They will surely notify Dumbledore.

However, there is the issue with the aliens that just because the students have wands, the aliens may not give them the opportunity to actually use them. These are stalking-hunting creatures and will eviscerate someone faster than you can say "vingadium leviosa" or whatever.

[The Romulan Republic]

Yeah, but most of the time students will be places in groups. And once people start disappearing/dying, or they find someone with a facehugger on them, no one's likely to be going off alone.

Of course, most of the students aren't hardened veterans of combat, so seeing one of their friends get eviscerated might make them simply freeze up or scatter in panic.

[Ford Prefect]

Besides the ghosts, what other security measures are there in the school?

The portraits are pretty much everywhere in the school, or at least, they're pretty much everywhere the xenomorphs can freely move, as they can't access the secret passages, and there aren't any massive vents to exploit. Anyway, does someone have the seventh book on hand? I can't find it and I wanted to check if Snape and McGonagal's duel featured the same sort of at-will combat teleportation that Dumbledore and Voldemort had in book five. I definitely remember their at-will transmutation of matter, but can't remember if they apparate in their fight.

[Darth Paxis]

I don't know that this would be a bloodbath on the students parts, the xenomorphs have no defense against magic, so even the beginning students could hex them enough to disorient while making escape or calling for help. Virtually ALL of the students have wands, and are essentially better armed than anyone short of the space marines we've seen in the movies.

Although I did have an intriguing idea, if the xenomorphs take on the physical characteristics of their hosts such as the dog alien in the third movie, does that mean they could erupt from a student either resistant to magic, or wielding some kind of primitive instinctual form? What if one face hugged a basilisk?

Not sure that the first years would be able to keep enough presence of mind to remember to hex the xenos, possibly the older students could though.

Magically endowed xenos? What magic would they be able to use? Teleportation maybe?

The basilisk would have to be nowhere near adult size for a facehugger to be a threat to it, but supposing this actually occured, would it inherit the killing/petrifying trait, or would the lack of eyes prevent this?

[The Romulan Republic]

The portraits are pretty much everywhere in the school, or at least, they're pretty much everywhere the xenomorphs can freely move, as they can't access the secret passages, and there aren't any massive vents to exploit. Anyway, does someone have the seventh book on hand? I can't find it and I wanted to check if Snape and McGonagal's duel featured the same sort of at-will combat teleportation that Dumbledore and Voldemort had in book five. I definitely remember their at-will transmutation of matter, but can't remember if they apparate in their fight.

Pretty sure they don't.

[TithonusSyndrome]

Although I did have an intriguing idea, if the xenomorphs take on the physical characteristics of their hosts such as the dog alien in the third movie, does that mean they could erupt from a student either resistant to magic, or wielding some kind of primitive instinctual form? What if one face hugged a basilisk?

The first book recounts Harry finding himself on a roof all of a sudden after being tormented by bullies. That's about the full extent of the magic I'd expect from untrained animals, and only if they were threatened like Harry was.

What I'm more curious about is what happens if they get Lupin. Will it become a were-xeno on the full moon, ferally turning on xeno and wizard alike?

[Molyneux]

Although I did have an intriguing idea, if the xenomorphs take on the physical characteristics of their hosts such as the dog alien in the third movie, does that mean they could erupt from a student either resistant to magic, or wielding some kind of primitive instinctual form? What if one face hugged a basilisk?

The first book recounts Harry finding himself on a roof all of a sudden after being tormented by bullies. That's about the full extent of the magic I'd expect from untrained animals, and only if they were threatened like Harry was.

What I'm more curious about is what happens if they get Lupin. Will it become a were-xeno on the full moon, ferally turning on xeno and wizard alike?

I tend to doubt that they would - he's one of the competent characters as far as combat goes, if I recall.

I foresee the Aliens being wiped out very quickly - I pray nothing remotely like Sectumsempra ever gets used on one! - and Hagrid winds up keeping one (drone) as a pet. Not much it can do to him, if every other nasty critter he collected hasn't killed him yet.

[TithonusSyndrome]

I tend to doubt that they would - he's one of the competent characters as far as combat goes, if I recall.

They can impregnate corpses, recall. This is probably how, if at all, they would impregnate the basilisk.

[ebs2323]

What if Hagrid gets a facehuger on him? he lives alone, if Harry could survive getting to him what would they do when they found Hagrid anyways?

[Molyneux]

I tend to doubt that they would - he's one of the competent characters as far as combat goes, if I recall.

They can impregnate corpses, recall. This is probably how, if at all, they would impregnate the basilisk.

...What? Since when?
I recall all of the hosts they dragged back to implant with facehuggers still remaining alive until "birth".

[TithonusSyndrome]

I tend to doubt that they would - he's one of the competent characters as far as combat goes, if I recall.

They can impregnate corpses, recall. This is probably how, if at all, they would impregnate the basilisk.

...What? Since when?
I recall all of the hosts they dragged back to implant with facehuggers still remaining alive until "birth".

Sure, because they would be pinned in place and there was never any need to kill them. Of course, corpses probably come with a "best before" date, so they wouldn't want to leave them too long.

[Molyneux]

Sure, because they would be pinned in place and there was never any need to kill them. Of course, corpses probably come with a "best before" date, so they wouldn't want to leave them too long.

When have they demonstrated that they could impregnate corpses?

[TithonusSyndrome]

In the game AVP: Extinction. I admit I have no idea if it's canonical and I simply allowed my experience with the game to integrate it's way into my general impressions of the AVP universe as a whole, but really, what about a freshly-killed corpse would be unsuitable for a chestburster to live in?

[Molyneux]

In the game AVP: Extinction. I admit I have no idea if it's canonical and I simply allowed my experience with the game to integrate it's way into my general impressions of the AVP universe as a whole, but really, what about a freshly-killed corpse would be unsuitable for a chestburster to live in?

...well, presumably the chestburster needs something that only a body can provide - I would think that one of those things would be oxygen, since they certainly seem to breathe.

I would not give that game canonical status...hell, I wouldn't give any movie past the second canonical status, if I could avoid it. "Alien" and "Aliens", and everything else has been a long slow slide to failure. With the exception of that one arcade beat-em-up; that was fun.

[TithonusSyndrome]

In the game AVP: Extinction. I admit I have no idea if it's canonical and I simply allowed my experience with the game to integrate it's way into my general impressions of the AVP universe as a whole, but really, what about a freshly-killed corpse would be unsuitable for a chestburster to live in?

...well, presumably the chestburster needs something that only a body can provide - I would think that one of those things would be oxygen, since they certainly seem to breathe.

And if you're a xeno drone who just dragged a corpse back to the hive, you're in a pretty good position to poke some airholes for the chestburster.

I would not give that game canonical status...hell, I wouldn't give any movie past the second canonical status, if I could avoid it. "Alien" and "Aliens", and everything else has been a long slow slide to failure. With the exception of that one arcade beat-em-up; that was fun.

I don't disagree, but the lack of a canon statement from Fox leaves us scrounging and uncertain.

[phred]

I imagine that after the first couple students disappear, the portraits would get in on the action. Which brings up the question, would the Xenos be able to properly sense the portraits? They could probably hear the portraits talking, but I'm not sure they would be able to work out what was going on without the ability to see them properly.

Hagrid's pets would be useless, since most of the ones he was allowed to keep rely on direct physical attack.

I do sort of wonder what would happen if a facehugger got one of the house elves first, though.

I think ultimately it would probably begin with a massive kill count against the students, then quickly turn into the faculty and older students rounding them up and burning them down

In the game AVP: Extinction. I admit I have no idea if it's canonical and I simply allowed my experience with the game to integrate it's way into my general impressions of the AVP universe as a whole, but really, what about a freshly-killed corpse would be unsuitable for a chestburster to live in?

...well, presumably the chestburster needs something that only a body can provide - I would think that one of those things would be oxygen, since they certainly seem to breathe.

And if you're a xeno drone who just dragged a corpse back to the hive, you're in a pretty good position to poke some airholes for the chestburster.

I thought in the original Alien they said the facehugger was keeping him alive while it was attached. Which seems like a lot of trouble to go through if they don't need a live body to incubate in.