Federation Stormtroopers vs Imperial Redshirts

IRG CommandoJoe · Post by **IRG CommandoJoe** » 2002-08-16 10:19pm

Here's the scenario:

Q wanted to have some fun with Kirk and an Imperial officer. He took Kirk off the Enterprise and took the Imperial officer off of an ISD. He put them on a desolate, uninhabited planet in a totally different galaxy. He gave Kirk the Imperial officer's uniform and equipment, along with a squad of Federation Redshirts in Imperial Stormtrooper gear and weapons. He gave the Imperial officer Kirk's uniform and gear, along with a squad of Imperial Stormtroopers in Federation Redshirt gear and weapons. Each squad is equal in numbers. Q told them the only way they would be able to go back to their own galaxies would be to fight until one side was dead, unconscious, captured, etc. Each side accepts the terms and are ready to fight. What happens?

Captain Cyran · Post by **Captain Cyran** » 2002-08-16 10:25pm

A name to this Imperial officer at all? aka Is he known charater from Star Wars so we can adiquitly gauge his military prowess?

Doomriser · Post by **Doomriser** » 2002-08-16 10:29pm

I doubt Kirk would accept those terms initially, but anyway...

Redshirts are of varying height, and thus cannot see properly through stormtrooper helmets. Blasters are completely unfamiliar to them but better designed than phasers. Too bad many won't be able to aim them properly due to height differences and unfamiliarity with the uniforms.

Stormtroopers, on the other hand, are trained in unarmed combat and so on. Without their armour, they would be even more mobile. The phasers would be of questionable effectiveness against stormtrooper armour, unfortunately, and several troopers would die before they learned.

The real meat of it is between Kirk and the Imperial officer. Kirk is not wearing his uniform any longer, so he cannot rip off his shirt and thus become stronger. This removes Kirk's advantage unless he can rip his officer's uniform.

OTOH the Imperial officer and stormtroopers have better training than redshirts so they should be able to overwhelm the Starfleet force despite inferior equipment. However, the stigma of the Redshirts is enough to corrupt their tactical abilities, so its pretty even there.

IRG CommandoJoe · Post by **IRG CommandoJoe** » 2002-08-16 10:51pm

Why would height affect a person's ability to see out of a helmet? It would affect the ability to fit into a uniform. Ok, so let's assume Q selected Redshirts and Stormtroopers that have very, very similar physical forms and exact same heights. The Imperial officer is just a no-name Imperial officer, like the no-name Redshirts and Stormtroopers. So the average Imperial officer and average Stormtroopers vs Kirk (without a plot shield...a non-rippable shirt) and average Redshirts. Of course Kirk and the officer wouldn't agree at first, but after however long it would take to convince the two, they both agree to fight. Q made sure they wouldn't cheat and gave them weapons after he teleported them....on two sides of a big...rock. In a matter of fact, how about if they are at the place where Kirk and that lizard alien (Gorg? Gorn?) fought each other, where Kirk built that cannon. (Except without the parts to make the cannon.) And this is before Kirk ever got there, so he wouldn't be familiar with the place at all. No technobabble, no plot shields, just a regular battle. The Redshirts "are" just regular Stormtroopers, where their primary weapons are E-11's. None of them are the higher-ranking ones with the color-coded ranks and big-ass blaster rifles. Kirk "is" an Imperial lieutenant with a blaster pistol, comlink, datapad, etc. Kirk has an un-rippable shirt (no plot shield). (However he still can kick some ass in a fist fight...if you can call it that.) The Stormtroopers "are" Redshirts with usual away mission equipment. The Imperial lieutenant "is" Kirk and has the usual equipment he has on away missions. Who would win?

Post by **Mr Bean** » 2002-08-16 11:01pm

The Storm-Shirts quickly relise that thier Guns can be used as Gernades, Quickly seiezing on this Two of the Troopers loob thier guns into the Shirt-Troopers

and utilize the Confusion to rush in hand to hand combat and get thier guns back and prompetly kill all off the Shirt-Troopers

Meanwhile Kirk and the Lietenuant engage in hand to hand Combat only to have BOTH go over the rock and fall into a Cave TO BE COUNTIUED!

Q having his answear ports them back

Stravo · Post by **Stravo** » 2002-08-16 11:05pm

Unfortunately, I have to go with teh Impie officer. Kirk's redshirts, though better equiped and armed now that they are stormies, simply don;t have the tactical know how or the sheer courage and fanatical will that Stromies have. Redshirts would be at a distinct advantage against troops that aren't afraid to charge a fortified position and actually know waht a flanking manuever is.

Kirk and the Impie officer. In a one on one, Kirk wins. He pulls some of those Kirk fu moves, particularly the flying drop kick o' death and the Impie officer goes down, let's face it, anyone that can be killed by flinging plkastic explosive at them and they fall over a railing with a REAL GIRLY scream (See ROTJ) is no match for Kirk.

It would come down to Kirk and the survivng Stormies and there would be a free for all, the Kirk fight music would play but in the end, sheer numbers bring him down as he cannot rip his shirt in the fight, the best he can do is bleed a little out of the corner of his mouth and wipe it, but with no ripped shirt effect...Kirk goes down. taking quite a few Stormies with him.

Post by **Mr Bean** » 2002-08-16 11:09pm

and the Impie officer goes down, let's face it, anyone that can be killed by flinging plkastic explosive at them and they fall over a railing with a REAL GIRLY scream

Gotta point out that was an Imperal NAVY Lieutnant not a Stormy Lieutnant(Check the sideboarding of the Ground Troopers on Hoth VS the Navy Troopers on the DS and on the ISDs you see that guy was Navy)

Post by **Mr Bean** » 2002-08-16 11:10pm

(*Forgot to add up Remeber AHN? That guy with diffrent Colored Side Board was a Stormy Lieutnant)

Post by **Mr Bean** » 2002-08-16 11:11pm

Yes this is a triple post but I relised I just wasted my 2000,2001, and 2002 post on this thread...

Stravo · Post by **Stravo** » 2002-08-16 11:13pm

Thanks for pointing that out, Mr. Bean. That hadn't crossed my mind. Stormie lieutenant or not...Drop kick o' death is pretty much unbeatable. I think Kahn was the only one to take one and survive.

Says alot about Navy officers though...that scream never fails getting a laugh fro me when I see that scene

IRG CommandoJoe · Post by **IRG CommandoJoe** » 2002-08-16 11:37pm

The color-coded ranks on the Stormie's shoulder is called a pauldron. The red pauldrons signify lieutenants??? Wow....Imperial officers must be really dumb then! Jedi mind tricks only work on the weak-minded. That sucks. And why aren't Redshirts considered to be worthless? I remember an episode where they used good tactics to locate where incoming mortar shells were coming from. And no technology either. He just pointed out to Kirk where he thought the best place for a mortar was, and sure enough, that was the spot. They destroyed the mortar. And they always have no trouble knocking the crap out of people on the ships. I never ever saw one flinch when stunning or just firing at someone. And they always hit someone on the first shot...amazingly with those POS phasers. So I think they could stand up against Stormtroopers, especially with their own equipment. Stormtroopers' aim would probably be horrible with the ergonomically horrible phasers. Redshirts wouldn't be able to figure out how to operate the thermal detonators on their backs, as well as Stormtroopers figuring out how to overload a phaser. Remember that Basic and English are completely different languages. Maybe they would be able to figure out how to set for stun and whatnot. But aside from that, how would they be able to figure out how to work their equipment if it's in another language? Like the tricorder....it'd be useless. UPLs would also be useless, as it is all in English, is it not? It would basically come down to pulling the trigger on their weapons' default settings. Stormtroopers might figure out how to use their communicators....but would the Redshirts figure out how to use the tongue-activated comlinks built into the Stormtrooper helmets? Kirk would be in Stormtrooper armor with a big-ass blaster, assuming the guy in ANH was a Stormtrooper lieutenant. Taking all of this into consideration, how would it affect the outcome of the battle?

Isolder74 · Post by **Isolder74** » 2002-08-16 11:54pm

this would be a mutual slaughter but the superiourity of the Stormies training would turn the tide and a few of them would walk away with the victory.

Asst. Asst. Lt. Cmdr. Smi · Post by **Asst. Asst. Lt. Cmdr. Smi** » 2002-08-17 12:22am

IRG CommandoJoe wrote:Why would height affect a person's ability to see out of a helmet?

Well, in the SWVD, it shows inside a helmet, and you odn't actually see out of it.

Anyway, I'm not sure who would win. Phasers might not be effective against Stormtrooper armor, and a near miss from more powerful blasters could kill someone. Such a scenario takes away hte Stormtrooper's advantage.

Post by **Mr Bean** » 2002-08-17 12:24am

Stormys are a nasty bunch when the Charater Shielded are not around they kick arse and take names like Space Marines in 40k

Vertigo1 · Post by **Vertigo1** » 2002-08-17 01:28am

It'll most likely go about like this:

Shirt-troopers step on exploding rocks or whatever exploding object that just HAPPENS to be in the area and all die. Storm-shirts on the other hand get mistaken for the enemy by the local ewoks and all die by primitive weaponry.

Kirk and the imp commanding officer get into hand-to-hand combat and somehow Kirk's shirt gets ripped. Kirk by default, kills the imp commander due to his superior character shields, but somehow the ground beneath him collapses and falls to his death thousands of feet to the pit bottom.

Q, having lost his source of entertainment, restores them back to where they were as if nothing had happened and goes about his business.

Raxmei · Post by **Raxmei** » 2002-08-17 02:13am

The Federation troops will make remarks like "armor went out with the bronze ages" or "I can't see a thing in this helmet." Then they will remove their stormtrooper uniforms.

The stormtroopers will look down at what they're wearing and strip it all off in disgust.

The two groups meet shortly afterwards. The Federation group looks upon the Imperial group, sees their sculpted muscular bodies, the product of years of strenuous training, glistening with sweat from the desert heat. Then the stormtroopers shoot them all while they're distracted.

IRG CommandoJoe · Post by **IRG CommandoJoe** » 2002-08-17 02:15am

How would Kirk rip his shirt if he were in Stormtrooper armor? Unless, you mean that he ripped his shirt on the Imp's body? LOL Just blast near him, rip Kirk's shirt, and then Kirk will shake out of his armor and pound the crap out of the officer. ROFL But conversely, the rip-shirt effect could empower the officer, and then he'd smash through Kirk's armor and beat him to a pulp like Kirk. Which would happen? (Although I never gave a rip-shirt scenario.)

IRG CommandoJoe · Post by **IRG CommandoJoe** » 2002-08-17 02:17am

Actually, the Redshirts would probably be quite comfortable in the climate-controlled body glove that the Stormtroopers lack and would just find an excuse to sit around and "guard the perimeter" in the desert.

BioDroid · Post by **BioDroid** » 2002-08-17 05:22am

Well, it all depends on who's writing...if it's a Paramount writer, Kirk refuses to fight. The Imperial Lt. Suddenly sprouts bony head ridges and stands next to Kirk, claiming that there is no honor in such a fight. Q relents and takes them all back home.

If it's a Lucasfilm writer, the Federation and Imperial forces immediately go head to head, with heavy casualties on both sides. Any Federation Troop who gets too near to Kirk or in any way tries to aid him immediately dies. Against the Fed troops, the Storm troopers have inerrant accuracy, though for some reason they can't seem to hit Kirk at all, or even come close to him. Eventually, the sides get wittled down to a handfull of Imperial Redshirts, and Kirk. When they surround him, though, the Enterprise (after trying one of the theories that Scotty has pulled out of his ass) suddenly arrives and beams James Tiberius immediately out of there, then hauls ass away. Q, incensed takes his anger out, not on the coward fleeing away in his starship, but crushes the life out of the few remaining stormtroopers, thus completing his journey to the darkside and falling under the sway of Palpatine.

Post by **Mr Bean** » 2002-08-17 08:40am

*Gah Papy with Q at his side?

On the news later that day....

Newsy: On an unrleatd note over two million people both Aliens, Humans and a few driods suddley across the Entire Galaxy turned into small Fuzzy Rabbits for some unknow reasons, The Emperor has declared Victory over the Rebel Allance who he says are now Rabbits, No one knows how this Dooms-day Rabbit Ray came into existance or from where but some speculate he will use it on any planet that resists his Rule, More information on this story as it devoples

Darth Yoshi · Post by **Darth Yoshi** » 2002-08-17 03:39pm

Mr Bean wrote:*Gah Papy with Q at his side?

On the news later that day....

Newsy: On an unrleatd note over two million people both Aliens, Humans and a few driods suddley across the Entire Galaxy turned into small Fuzzy Rabbits for some unknow reasons, The Emperor has declared Victory over the Rebel Allance who he says are now Rabbits, No one knows how this Dooms-day Rabbit Ray came into existance or from where but some speculate he will use it on any planet that resists his Rule, More information on this story as it devoples

LOL!!

Anyway, it'd go like this. The pseudostormies enjoy superior weaponry, and the benefits of stormie armor. However, they don't understand Basic, the standard Imperial language. Thus, they can't use the more advanced functions of the armor. The pseudo-redshirts are unable to use the tricorders, but after a while, deduce that tricorders are active scanners, and opt to forgo them in favor of good old stealth. Several scouts are sent to find the pseudostormies, but they get caught. The scouts learn the hard way that phasers can't penetrate the armor, and try to hit the joints, having success if these are TOS phasers, and failing if they are the ergonomic mightmare that is TNG phaser. Regardless, the pseudo-redshirts beat hasty retreat after a minute of shooting. At the pseudo-redshirt base, the pseudo-redshirts have made a chokepoint by breaking rocks off the mountain. The chokepoint is wide enough for only one armor clad person at a time, meaning the pseudostormies will face mass fire if they try an infantry rush. The pseudo-redshirt scouts are spotted again, and two are killed by lucky shots. The surviving scout leads the pseudostormies back to his encampment, where the mass fire tactic punches through the joints of the each pseudostormie as he exits the chokepoint. Meanwhile, Kirk and several pseudosotrmies have scaled the mountain to attack from behind and witness the slaughter. Enraged, Kirk charges, with the pseudostormies following. A near miss from a recovered E-11 sends him down, and blood leaks from the corner of his mouth, making him that much more evasive. The pseudostormies are cut down by the pseudo-redshirts, who have their E-11s back. Kirk's enhanced condition allows him to take out several psedo-redshirts before a blaster sot knocks his E-11 away. Kirk go to hand-to-hand, and knocks out several pseudo-redshirts, before finally getting hit.

IRG CommandoJoe · Post by **IRG CommandoJoe** » 2002-08-17 05:26pm

Why would Kirk send his men into a space so narrow they'd have to go one at a time?

Darth Yoshi · Post by **Darth Yoshi** » 2002-08-17 05:49pm

It's either that or climb the mountain. I doubt the pseudostormies are as fit as Kirk. And nobody said Kirk was logical. Also, I meant to write up the whole scenario as a nightmare some Trekkie had. I hit the submit button by accident, though.

IRG CommandoJoe · Post by **IRG CommandoJoe** » 2002-08-17 05:53pm

Lord_Vader · Post by **Lord_Vader** » 2002-08-17 06:05pm

LOL I liked the post about Scott pulling some theory outta his ass and hauling Kirk away hahaha.