Tyranid Hive Mind Jacking... In Soviet Russia Version (rar)

[Purple]

...makes you look like a cross between a basement-dwelling permavirgin otaku and a million Hitlers, I really would hope that you avoided all "life enjoying" forever. Your sociopathy is showing and it ain't pretty.

Well firstly, I newer hid the fact that I am a slight sociopath. I am slightly less capable of proper empathy, I do not believe in the rights of plants or animals and other such nonsense. I believe in the use of chemical weapons and the death penalty. And yes, I am Otaku in the worst sense. So yes, I probably am a somewhat bad person. But that is not the point.


The point I was trying to make is that everyone immediately jumped at a: "How would I conquer the galaxy with this" scenario. When in reality, I doubt anyone here would go through with what he or she described. My scenario: "Go out of everyones way and have fun." (or in case of the earth thing: "Take what you need and have fun.") sounds much more likely and down to earth.

I mean, take it for a moment you do manage to capture the whole of earth through decades of machinations or what ever. For a start the sheer size of the administrative job to control all of it would be mind boggling. And than there are the millions of disputes, the interracial and international/religious/what ever hate. And a myriad of other things.

I doubt that even if we all pulled together we could control the whole earth, let alone a multi planetary empire.


Hence, I presented a counterargument.
Also, I find it interesting how the internet tends to bring out the adventurer/conquerer/megalomaniac in people.

Maybe he came from the abyss of the internet,the 4chan.

I tried going there once. But I got confused as hell since I could not find anything. So I gave up.

[Sarevok]

I mean, take it for a moment you do manage to capture the whole of earth through decades of machinations or what ever. For a start the sheer size of the administrative job to control all of it would be mind boggling. And than there are the millions of disputes, the interracial and international/religious/what ever hate. And a myriad of other things.

Tyranids have a diverse array of abilities. Lets say in some bizarro world you decide to use the swarms power and abilities peacefully. I can think of hundreds of covert ways to unify and bring peace to Earth. You can use a combination of stick and carrot approach combined with infiltration for good effects.

[Purple]

The problems don't end with unification. They start with unification.

Lets say you had earth on a plate, ready for your rule right now.
What would you do? How would you do it? For example, how would you get the Americans to accept you if you are more communist, or the Chinese if you are pro capitalist? How would you reconcile Israel and Palestine? How would you get the Arabs to stop hating the west, the Hindus to stop hating the Pakistanis? Do you understand what I am trying to say?


And even if you do that. How to hell would you manage to keep track of the entire world, let alone rule it. The sheer size of the state apparatus required would have to be so immense that you would have no idea what was happening at the bottom levels.

[Sarevok]

1)I don't require a perfect world nor do I believe it is possible. A world with fewer deaths from violence is still a relatively better world.

2) The threat my Tyranids posses is enough to make countries abide by geopolitical changes I think would be beneficial. It would not be a polite way to make changes. But it is better than the alternative which is to do nothing.

[Purple]

Is it? Especially when the alternative is to have fun, or if you are truly benevolent pick up your friends and family and than have fun.

But at this point we are going down to opinions and these are undebatable.
So I concede, to each his own.

Just as long as no one wants to build a centralized empire with full control over everything. If you do, I am here to debate with you.

[Sarevok]

Yeah. You have a good point there. Why take the burden of ruling the galaxy/planet/universe when you can have fun for yourself ? The job of galactic overlord maybe too taxing for some.

[IvanTih]

Well firstly, I newer hid the fact that I am a slight sociopath. I am slightly less capable of proper empathy, I do not believe in the rights of plants or animals and other such nonsense. I believe in the use of chemical weapons and the death penalty. And yes, I am Otaku in the worst sense. So yes, I probably am a somewhat bad person. But that is not the point.

Then I am slight sociopath too and a human supremacist since I believe that since we rule the planet we can do anything do plants and animals and not answer for it.

[Purple]

Well firstly, I newer hid the fact that I am a slight sociopath. I am slightly less capable of proper empathy, I do not believe in the rights of plants or animals and other such nonsense. I believe in the use of chemical weapons and the death penalty. And yes, I am Otaku in the worst sense. So yes, I probably am a somewhat bad person. But that is not the point.

Then I am slight sociopath too and a human supremacist since I believe that since we rule the planet we can do anything do plants and animals and not answer for it.

As long as there is no direct or indirect damage to humanity from it.

[SapphireFox]

Zoanthropes can teleport units on the battlefield, but I don't know about stellar distances.

Um... Bob when have they displayed this ability? Because I have never heard anything about them teleporting in the fluff and there says nothing about teleporting in the latest Tyranid Codex. I'm not saying you are wrong but could you post an example because like I have said I haven't seen or heard anything of the sort.

[keen320]

And even if you do that. How to hell would you manage to keep track of the entire world, let alone rule it. The sheer size of the state apparatus required would have to be so immense that you would have no idea what was happening at the bottom levels.

I don't know much about Tyranids, but couldn't you just evolve/clone yourself a brain the size of a supercomputer that would let you monitor and control everything? I'd think you would have to do that anyway to control a hivemind.

Also, if your really Orwellian about it, couldn't you force everyone to carry or accept an implant of some kind of monitor creature that reports their every move? Maybe even their thoughts?

[Bob the Gunslinger]

Zoanthropes can teleport units on the battlefield, but I don't know about stellar distances.

Um... Bob when have they displayed this ability? Because I have never heard anything about them teleporting in the fluff and there says nothing about teleporting in the latest Tyranid Codex. I'm not saying you are wrong but could you post an example because like I have said I haven't seen or heard anything of the sort.

Hmmm... Maybe I'm misremembering. I thought it happened in one of the BL novels, maybe Warriors of Ultramar?

I retract my claim, then.

[Swindle1984]

The problems don't end with unification. They start with unification.

Lets say you had earth on a plate, ready for your rule right now.
What would you do? How would you do it? For example, how would you get the Americans to accept you if you are more communist, or the Chinese if you are pro capitalist? How would you reconcile Israel and Palestine? How would you get the Arabs to stop hating the west, the Hindus to stop hating the Pakistanis? Do you understand what I am trying to say?

"Get along or I'll eat you."

It's how Saddam kept Iraq together (more or less) this whole time; it's less stable now because there's no genocidal dictator sending his secret police around or nerve-gassing ethnic minorities to keep people in line. Since you're now a Tyrannid and not given to give a shit about hurting people's feelings, make an example of some uncooperative people and infest some others to make them cooperate. They'll either pretend to get along to keep from being targeted or put aside their differences because now they hate you more than each other; either way, they're not fighting any more.

Force cultural changes to reduce differences between different regions and thereby decrease conflict in the area. Punish troublemakers severely, reward cooperative people extravagantly. Carrot and stick. In this case, a REALLY big stick, because you're a flesh-devouring abomination.

Alternatively, of course, you could play everyone against each other to ensure that nobody ever gets organized enough to challenge your rule.

And even if you do that. How to hell would you manage to keep track of the entire world, let alone rule it. The sheer size of the state apparatus required would have to be so immense that you would have no idea what was happening at the bottom levels.

Ever hear of a little thing called "delegation"? It's how empires are ruled. Plus, you're a space monster; just infest a few people so they're absolutely loyal to you and put them in charge of different regions and responsibilities. Delegate further down the line until you have things taken care of.

[Purple]

Taken into account what you just said Swindle1984 I have to say that while I personally like that sort of a world most people would be of the opinion that your product is worse than the mess we are in now.

So if it is not for the greater good of mankind, and since it is way too much work compared to just having fun it can't be for the good of your self either. Why bother?

[SapphireFox]

*snip*

If you are going to go that kind of a route why don't you just absorb humanity into a controlling hive mind. Instant universal peace and order just give up your free will to your tyranid oppressors.

[Chaotic Neutral]

Now you must explore your new surroundings and find out where you are and what do to do afterwords.

Your challenge is what do you do if you and your 'Nids found yourself in the following places.

This should be fun.

1. Star Wars universe Clone wars era in the outer-rim (likely being discovered by Dooku's forces or Obi-wan and Anikin's fleet)

First off, I stay put and try to figure out where I am, then attack some far flung systems no one cares about.

Then I wait for the Vong to attack. After which I destroy a small Vong force, and use their technology to make ships that aren't pieces of crap. With my new technology, I take over the galaxy, forcing planets to give me tributes of food.

2. Star Trek universe Late TNG era near the Romulan Neutral Zone. (likely running into the Enterprise-D or the Romulans possibly both)

Kill everything, move on.

3. Haloverse during the Battle of Onyx (likely turning a three way into a four way battle)

Same, anything that can fight the Imperium can curbstomp the Haloverse.

4. Our Universe at Earth right after you left it.

I set myself up as dictator for eternity, and enjoy my reign.

5. You didn't escape the Warhammer universe after all instead you find yourself out near the Tau-Imperial border. (as you hear the the laughter of the chaos gods mocking you for believing you escaped)

After attacking outlying Imperium worlds for food and growth, I assume humanoid form and make an alliance with the Tau, I will help them massively expand and grow, and in exchange, they give me tribute in the form of food. We proceed to devastate the Galaxy.

Really, I don't see why the Nids didn't do this much, much earlier.