SD.net Lost on island RAR!

[LaCroix]

Hy everybody!

In this scenario, the entire established (50+ posts and not banned) population of SD.net is scooped up by Q and sent to a private island in the Caribbean with no volcano eruption, earthquake, hurricane or anything else bad ever happening to it. Each of us is dropped on his own island. Said island is utterly devoid of any other tourists, has power and water in a luxury bungalow and storage is full of stuff (including food), and all animal and plant life is friendly...

-Hosts/esses: There are about two dozen people of your preferred gender (and hot!) milling around the island maintaining the various attractions and willing to fulfill every wish you have. Every! You just have to ask...

-Wildlife: The island will have tropical animals, all friendly to humans, and whatever pets/domesticated animals you want. You will also have the possibility to hunt, if wanted. Water will be warm all year and bad weather is not coming anywhere near that island, only a suitable breeze comes up whenever you want to go sailing or something.

-Spa: Your bungalow has all equipment you need to relax - huge suite for you, a pool with bar, training room, computer room with T1 connection to the net, disco, bowling alley, sex dungeon. You name it, it's there...

-Garage: The island has a road net, and a race course. The Garage has a hundred cars of all kinds, from Old-timers to F1 race car, and as many motorcycles. There is an airstrip with Hangar, with all the planes you want, from the wright flier up to raptor. Helicopters are next door.

-Harbor: Everything from a kayak to a three master is available in the cay.

-Power: All of the island is powered by geothermal and stuff, and a magic well given by Q gives all the fuel you need. A bit of that is sold to maintain your island, but the hot crew is managing everything for you...

Equipment:

You are given a bathing suit of your preference. Everything else is supplied by the island or can be obtained within hours by air-mail. You can invite friends and/or family over whenever you want. Q will cure all ailments you or your beloved ones have. You have an endless supply of money due to the magic well.

The island is surrounded by a magic force field that keeps everyone friendly and doesn't allow anybody to even think about taking it from you. Your hosts/hostesses are completely devoted to you and your well being and will never betray you. (They are also intelligent enough to have long conversations and don't know envy or jealousy.)

Q will give this to you because he has been torturing us needlessly in all these RAR!s he didn't want to have a part in, anyway, and wants his spare-time back without being bothered by Zor every few days.

You are allowed to stay on that island infinitely, as long as you find the most gruesome death for Zor! Since Q is the master of multi-dimensional tasking, he can torture Zor in an infinite number of realities simultaneously, and has set as many as established SDN-ians are around, to give each Zor his due.

[Thanas]

Oh, this is so my thing.

*however, should this not be in testing?*

[LaCroix]

Since Zor did his latest RAR! stuff here, I though the punishment should fit the crime...

We don't want anybody to miss this thread just because they don't frequent Testing, don't we?

Edit:

And I go for the classic - the hole and fire ants. Only modification would be that I would give him a oxygen mask with ten hours supply and leave only his ass above ground... That's how his scenarios make me feel.

[Purple]

I would immediately take it as a test of my abilities to produce as many children as I can and work healthily toward that goal as much as I can and as often as I can until I collapse from exhaustion. Than I would take a break to relax in the spa.



And I would make Zor watch all this from a cage. No torture, nothing. Just let him watch me enjoy my self as he dies of starvation and dehydration.
That should do it nicely I think. I mean, he could probably last for a few weeks without water and that should not be nice if he is forced to watch me have fun as an added bonus.

[Solauren]

My torture for Zor?

Make him live through all his RARs, from the worse possible position possible. He can't be killed, but he can be seriously injuried, and some compulsion forces him to keep going until he completes the RAR.

i.e - Opps, your legs are off. Crawl along on your elbows!

[Shroom Man 777]

I will surgerize a uterus into his face and make him bear the seed of my grotesque progeny.

[Bottlestein]

Having to see SDN'ers in bathing suits is more torture than Zor deserves

[Hawkwings]

Most gruesome death for Zor, not torture.

[OmegaChief]

I propose to Q that he use the infinate RAR gerneator that is Zors mind to pluck a suitabley gruesome fate up for him.

And then resuract him and do it again. But only after a short break to think that he;s got off scott free. Rinse and Repeat and have them broadcast on TV on our islands with Zor safe in the knowledge that we're all having and endleslly fun time while he's unwittingly causing himself to have RAR related deaths over and over and over.

Sorry Zor, Q's counter offer in this case is so worth it

[PainRack]

Worms. There's a whole bunch of parasitic worms out there, from the common tapeworm to the more gruesome type which manifest themself in your skin, while boring through lungs, eyes or brains.

Introduce them wholesale to him and watch him itch to death as he scratch his arse, skin and whatever as the worms play havoc in laying eggs and coming out to spawn. Meanwhile, introduce high dose of Clexane or any other anticoagulant, sufficient to push his INR high enough that he has mild internal bleeding... Something the worms will aggravate.

Imagine pinpricks of blood eeking out here and there as the worm manifest. Oooh, and for fun freaky part, there are some parasites which manifest themselves in your testicles. The testicle is a vascular organ. So imagine a spurt of blood and constant bleeding as the parasites screw with his balls!

Maybe another worm manifestation in the breasts or neck, although bleeding from the jugular vein would be an spray of red mist as skin erosion sets in before he rapidly pass away.

[Zixinus]

Gruesome something for Zor... how about having his body taken over by a intelligent parasite-thingy that not only will impregnate its young into Zor's friends and family, but will actually have a good deal higher intelligence, competence, empathy and skill. It will outperform Zor in work, personal relationships, academic carrier and have a very, very happy life as it not only rises in human society but turns the people around him into parasitic if slightly superior one.

Meanwhile, Zor is fully conscious of it all, will not be cured and cannot effect it in any way yet with the constantly clear knowledge that it is not him but a parasite that does all the things instead.

[Night_stalker]

Well, I for one have decided on having Zor be placed in a pit, which has Dorylus Acutus pheromone sprayers. And some local Dorylus Acutus hives ready to be released from their containers.

Then I sit back at the bungalow, and push the "OPEN ARMY ANT HIVES" button.

Let the good times roll.

[lordofchange13]

1) make him eat is own mother(irony)
2)make elephants have sex with him

then live out my life on the island periodically vaporizing him with my plasma cannon. also a gladiator fight with chuck norris!

[The_Saint]

How tall is he? A cylindrical cage where diameter and height are about 10-15cm's less than his height. Mess with the thermostat: bright light's on for 14 hours with cold, dry air, blackout for the other 10 hours, hot and high humidity. Enough food to sustain him.

Q can also take my island and shift it 15,000 K's West to somewhere in the Whitsundays.

[Chaotic Neutral]

I have Zor's soul eaten by a Dark Eldar, and then turned into a grotesque.

I love outsourcing.

[Norade]

Take him, blindfold him, and place a breathing tube/feeding tube/catheter on him and drop him in a dark barrel of lukewarm water. Beat the barrel to bruise and hurt without leaving marks and slowly start to introduce hallucinogens into his food to drive him slowly insane. Then let him live out his life in pain dealing with his own worst nightmares.

[Shroom Man 777]

I KNOW! We will use ULTIMATE SDN OSF techniques to make Zor's torture the worst torture ever! Dig this, using stupid TRANSHUMANIST SCI-FI technology we can kill Zor repeatedly while each time making new clones of Zor exactly like the dead Zors with the same memories. Maybe with a transporter! Does this mean Zor died when the first Zor gets killed? Or, because Zor got replaced by another Zor indistinguishable from Zor with the same Zor memories and bad speeling and grammers, then Zor has never died and Zor is still alive and we shouldn't care about the original dead Zor? Oh no, philosophisticating conundrums!

But that isn't it! The best part of this ULTIMATE OSF torture technique? Each method of killing the Zors will be different and unique! Each death will basically be a live fire exercise using the various weapons of our favorite sci-fi franchises, a real experiment to really determine the true weapons yields irregardless of shitty CGI or outdated claymation 70s special effects! Assuming Zor is a spherical mass of iron, and calculating his vaporizations! Yes! We can put him on an asteroid and vaporize him with a turbolaser, and then calculate the yields in jiggertons! Or Connor can grab a lasgun and vape Zor and computate the megajoules! We will stuff Zor's remains inside packing crates and try boiling it with phasers set to wide-beam, except they don't have trigger guards lol! Oooh! Oooh! We can deck Zor out in stormtrooper armor and then have Ewoks pelt him with rocks and arrows, to see how debilitating the Ewok attacks were and to see how stupid stick arrows can penetrate gaps in stormtrooper armor!

Zor will become like that crash test dummy in Mythbusters! Buster! AND his noble sacrifice will be used to settle all versus debates (AND transhumanist BS!)! YES!

[LaCroix]

We need an "I like" button for Shroom's posts...

[PeZook]

You people are horrible.

Will I spoil the party if I say that I'd tell Q I want no part of this sick experiment and go home?

...or I'll stock up on arms via airmail and burn down all the other islands filled with sadistic fucks

[Dave]

Use Zor as a test dummy for my floating space gun.

Or a target if the payload goes suborbital. I mean, you know, whichever.

[fallendragon]

I am thinking throw him into a black hole.

[Michael Garrity]

Hi:

1) Give Zor to the Mythbusters as a living replacement for Buster. After each show, he's resurrected and healed of all damage, and has full memories of what happened; repeat as necessary.
Did I mention that Zor's vocal cords were surgically removed so he couldnt scream?

2) Destroy Zor's immune system and send him to England, circa 1347 (the height of the Black Death)

3) Throw him into a tank of your preferred chemical agent (Sarin, VX, GB, etc)

4) Enable Zor to fully experience why tank crews call people on foot 'crunchies' (from the viewpoint of the person on foot)

Mike

[Michael Garrity]

Hi:

1) Clone Zor
2) Link Zor and the Zor clone's minds together; this way each sees, hears and feels what the other is experiencing
3) kill the clone
4) bury the clone in the Pet Sematary, thus causing it to come back as an evil demon-possessed shell of its former self; note that the mind link is still active
5) turn the now undead clone against the living Zor

Mike

[Carinthium]

I'm not Zor, but couldn't he get out of a significant part of this by being dropped on his own island according to the letter of the rules? Sure- a lot of copies would be tortured, but the main Zor would be in a decent position.

Also, this thread is a little sick (although if this really happened I'd "crack" and get to torturing).

[PeZook]

Really? You'd torture someone in exchange for a magic island on the Pacific?

Man...human nature at its best