A slight digression from transgenderism, but related to dealing with Serious Problems.Revy wrote:Well I only really read the OP here, but as someone who is transgender I can't say it surprises me very much. I live in the UK though, so things are a bit different here. The NHS will help out with things like hormone treatments and medical checkups, assuming of course you aren't stuck in the arse end of the country with only one bigoted bitch of a doctor who shrugs and smiles at the suggestion that you might kill yourself.
Oh, and the hate is just fucking fantastic. My own sister threatened to hire people to kill me if I didn't move as far away from her as possible. Considering that she married into a rich snob-tastic family, I didn't want to take the chance that she was bluffing and I moved. At least it lets you know who your real friends are. Soon as I came out none of my friends wanted to have anything to do with me anymore.
Funny thing is, compared to the rest of my family I think I'm not half bad. I don't have a gambling problem like my first sister, I'm not an alcaholic junkie like my second sister, I'm not an abusive bastard who cheated on my wife after beating the crap out of her like my dad, I'm not friends with a pedophile and a rapist like my step dad. Hell, I was the only person in a crowd who stopped to help an old lady who'd dropped the bags she was trying to carry onto the ferry. Apparently the only thing I have against me is being transgender, but it makes me far worse than any of my fucked up family.
Well I'll be damned if I'm going to kill myself. I'm going to try my best to become as successful as possible so I can give them all the finger and enjoy life as much as I can. Way I see it, it could be a lot worse. I'm not paralysed, or blind, I don't have cancer or any other kind of terminal illness. Hell if you look at it that way, I'm practically lucky.
I have a long time friend who has borderline personality disorder - not an easy person to like, much less love. For her first three decades she was the sick one, the defective one, the hopeless one, and so on. In and out of hospitals. Sleeping on the street because her family wouldn't have her. Then she finally found some friends that liked her (yes, it is possible to like someone with significant mental illness) and stuck by her through her "episodes", visited her in the hospital, encouraged her, and didn't run screaming down the hallway when she'd do something incredibly fucked up like giving herself a third degree burn. Deliberately. We didn't approve, but we didn't reject her even when we didn't understand her or she did icky things.
She got her shit together, got a doctorate level education, and is now professionally successful and found an environment she is comfortable to live in. On top of that, she is now taking care of her mother, who throughout an abusive marriage and a bunch of other horseshit never wanted to admit the family had Serious Problems, and taking care of her sibling, who is a thoroughly fucked up raging alcoholic and having other mental issues and irresponsibility who would be entirely homeless were it not for her - nevermind that that kid was the "good" one the "perfect" one, the socially acceptable one.
My point? You can have a Serious Problem(s) and still have a good life if you just DO SOMETHING about the problems instead of sweeping them under the rug. If you have minor problems and let them run rampant you'll have a shitty life. My friend had serious, serious problems that would have eventually killed her if she had done nothing, but she actually dealt with her shit. She's still not normal, but she's functional and she's achieved some happiness in life. Likewise, someone transgender has a Serious Problem but if that is dealt with they can wind up being high functioning and do well - much better than chronically broke gamblers, much better than alcoholic/junkie siblings who never clean up, much better than snobbish siblings more concerned with social prettiness than mental health.
As I pointed out to my friend - in her family she is now the Normal One, despite her dire mental health diagnosis. So, Revy, let me encourage you to keep dealing with your Serious Problem. It may take awhile, but you WILL find people who are real friends who will really stick by you (I'm hoping you have some already). Also, the best revenge is living well. 25 years from now, be the one with a stable life, good people around you, and a comfortable mode of living and let the gamblers, addicts, and miserable snobs wonder how the hell you do it.
And back to the main topic - we have the current "sex change" treatments as valid treatments because those transgender people who undergo such treatment are much more likely to fall into the "living well" category than the morgue. Again, it may not be perfect but the results are an improvement in how these people function. That's the justification. Such people continue to have problems and issues, they need on going treatment like hormone therapy, but bottom line if it makes their lives better it's justified no matter how much the idea squicks out people who don't have to live with their problem. It's hardly the only medical issue with squick potential.