David Weber's "Out of the Darkness"

[Jaevric]

So, normally being a Weber fan and fairly tolerant of his undeniable flaws as an author, I got desperate over the holidays and picked up a copy of this novel.

Short version: Don't pay money for it. It's cliched as hell and the ending is so freaking bizarre I have to wonder if Weber has suffered serious brain damage as a result of excessive exposure to John Ringo. The novel has heavy doses of "America, fuck yeah!" and "rednecks with guns fighting the good fight against alien invaders." If you absolutely must read this, wait until it's available at the library. Also, I heartily recommend alcohol use prior, during, and after reading.

Long version, with spoilers: Spoiler

An advanced alien government is formed of numerous different species. Some are herbivores, some omnivores, and one of the civilizations is made up of carnivores -- who are disliked by the other civilizations mostly because, hey, they're carnivores. A group of herbivores are spying on earth during one of the wars between France and England, and get freaked out when English longbowmen slaughter the hell out of attacking French then kill the French wounded. Their report gets kicked up to their superiors, and the carnivores are authorized some few hundred years later to conquer Earth "for its own good."

As is so often the case, the "humans are way smarter than everyone else and progress technologically faster" cliche comes into play, and instead of finding a bunch of humans just experimenting with gunpowder and steam engines the aliens find humans with technology that is sufficient to actually fight back. Most of the military is wiped out during the opening bombardments, but those human military formations that survive kick the shit out of the aliens they engage. In all fairness, the aliens promptly smash the humans with more kinetic strikes. Guerilla warfare ensues with varying degrees of success, in no small part due to the fact that there are a lot of Americans with guns who know how to use them. In all fairness, there are also Ukrainian and Romanians who kill a bunch of aliens -- it's not all "America, Fuck Yeah."

In the end, the carnivores decide we're more trouble than we're worth because humans "lack the ability to submit" and they're going to wipe us out with a targetted bioweapon and claim it was an accident when the rest of the aliens get around to noticing that we're all dead. At which point, and this is not a joke, Vlad Dracul comes along, turns a bunch of other people into vampires, and they wipe out 3 of the alien bases then board their starships by hanging off the side of the shuttles as they return to orbit, capture the ships, and fly them back to the carnivores' homeworld(s) to kill them all from orbit. After leaving the aliens' industrial ships in place setting up the earth so in a couple hundred years we will be able to kick the shit out of all the other aliens since they're obviously all assholes too.

Yes, you just read that right, and Count Dracula is the savior of humanity in a novel about an alien invasion.

[Srelex]

Sounds like Weber's been cribbing a bit from Turtledove's Worldwar from that.

[Themightytom]

This is preposterous. Aliens are real and vampires aren't.

[Jaevric]

This is preposterous. Aliens are real and vampires aren't.

Don't be ridiculous. Vampires are real, but Spoiler

they'd never survive the heat of leaving the atmosphere hanging onto the side of a shuttle. Duh!

[Mr Bean]

This is preposterous. Aliens are real and vampires aren't.

You have to admit, you did not see that fucking coming.

Sir zee aliens are at the gates!
Well then soldier break out our secret weapon!
What weapon sir?
Send in the mummies!

Also second plot point Spoiler

What about the whole daylight+vampires, would not traveling to the enemy ship expose them to sunlight?

[Dahak]

Also second plot point Spoiler

What about the whole daylight+vampires, would not traveling to the enemy ship expose them to sunlight?

Spoiler

Very much depends on the type and setting employed for vampires. Not all are that allergic to sunlight or garlic as "classic" vampires.

[Mr Bean]

That just raises more questions! Spoiler

But this is not Twlight, this is Vlad Dracul, Grand Daddy Vampire, turns into a bat, wolf, mist and looks just like Bela Lugosi. He could not take the sun, so why can Vlad take not only the heat but the light? Seriously if that's how he takes them down he should laugh off light machine guns, flamethrowers and might have a decent chance of taking a tank shell considering the heat and pressure of a shit leaving orbit

Also I approve of this change in Weber's writing, if this is his timid first steps I can't wait to see what he turns out when he starts getting into the serious shit.

[Themightytom]

This is preposterous. Aliens are real and vampires aren't.

You have to admit, you did not see that fucking coming.

Sorry Bean I'm so sued to watching stargate that at this point I find historical mythology and science fiction interchangeable. half of Weber's books feature alien centaurs or android wizards anyway.

[Jaevric]

Spoiler

Vlad can survive direct sunlight, the newbie vamps can't. They aren't affected by crosses and can enter churches. One of the vampires makes the point that he still prays on a regular basis (sigh, of course he does since he's one of the Good Guys). They use the mist thing to avoid the aliens' security systems and break into facilities then tear the gun-carrying aliens apart with their bare hands. One of them takes a bunch of shots to the chest and the bullets pass right through him as if he's made of mist.

And, no, I have to admit I never saw this particular "iwin" button coming.

[Simon_Jester]

Also I approve of this change in Weber's writing, if this is his timid first steps I can't wait to see what he turns out when he starts getting into the serious shit.

Having not read the book...

How do you mean? Do you mean that this plot is a departure from his earlier types? Or has he changed his writing style?

What Weber really really needs to do as an author is pare down the fat in his writing; the books have gotten so overloaded lately that you can skip entire paragraphs without really missing anything. Has he done that, or is it still the same ol' same ol'?

[Lord of the Abyss]

In previous stories, he's dropped a Greek Fury into a far-future sci-fi setting and dropped an American armored vehicle from Iraq into a fantasy setting, so it isn't that out of character for him to mix genres. As for the plot twist, I've seen something similar before from another author (although in that case all of humanity was dead.)
Spoiler

In that one, a short story from the vampire anthology Tomorrow Sucks whose author I can't recall, aliens killed off all life on earth with radiation, but were shocked to find surviving "humans". So they picked the survivors up for examination...which proved to be a mistake. "Nothing human could have survived what you did to the Earth. Nothing human did."

[TOSDOC]

Jaevric, I can't thank you enough for posting that summary--that kind of ending would have totally had me going postal, and you saved me a wad of cash to boot.

@themightytom--took me an hour to type this, I was laughing so hard.

[Junghalli]

Also second plot point Spoiler

What about the whole daylight+vampires, would not traveling to the enemy ship expose them to sunlight?

Depends. The shuttles could have followed a trajectory that kept them in the Earth's shadow the whole time.

[Mr Bean]

How do you mean? Do you mean that this plot is a departure from his earlier types? Or has he changed his writing style?

LSD, mescaline, psilocybin, tryptamine.
You know, that quality improvement/sanity reducing preformance enhancing drugs.

[Simon_Jester]

If all that changes is that instead of babbling for pages about miscellaneous topics he babbles for pages about his acid trip, I think I'll pass.

Now, if he can write in reasonably compact form about his acid trip, I'm thrilled. Weber was decent back when he could write a 300 page novel.

[Raxmei]

Draculas surviving in sunlight has precedent in fiction. Bram Stoker's Dracula springs to mind. Vulnerability to sunlight is not the absolute fact of Dracula existence that some people take it for.

[Mayabird]

I read this, and I have this serious thought of Weber being a Dr. McNinja fan and throwing together the ending because he read the storyline about Dracula's moon base. It is...weird.

It looks like it was published around September 2010. When was it written?

[Jade Owl]

I read this as a short story in an anthology called Warriors, but I can’t for the life of me imagine how the hell he managed to expand that into full length novel.

If he turns this into a series, he’ll have won the “Most Creative Way to Cash In on the Vampire Fad” award.

[Eframepilot]

I read (well, skimmed) this in the Warriors anthology in its original novella size. I'm surprised that Weber expanded it into a full novel. It seemed like a long setup for the twist at the end ("Alien invaders run afoul of Count Dracula!"). Though foreshadowed, it was still a shock to have such an out of place element revealed at the end of the story. It must be even worse in a full length novel.

Let's just hope that M. Night Shyamalan doesn't read it.

[white_rabbit]

This book was worthless cookie-cutter shit, and the vampires bit was crap as well.

Its basically Footfall, but with carnivores, including far too much time spent looking at a bunch of survivalist types, retard aliens who are astonished at how awesome humans are, and awesome humans who have physical and mental advantages over the aliens, just by chance.

Just by chance, the alien drones are audible to humans from miles off, making them naff at stealthy spying.

Just by chance, the aliens planned to fight bow and arrow people, so get trashed, theres even a page or two describing how some human rifle round would rofl-rape through aliens puny bodies plus armour etc, whilst their puny bullets would bounce off.

Just by chance, the aliens know about all this, but don't change their tactics a great deal, and have handily got doctrinal cockups for the mighty Harmanz to exploit, such as their drones all hovering at really low levels because the humans were supposed to have bows, (they never alter this AFAIK) and all communications are routed through the drones, so shooting them down cripples alien formations, because they are carnivore pack types, and initiative is hated.

Just by chance, vampires exist and save the day at the very, very, very, very, very end of the book.

The survivalists are hilarious as well. I think they ended up with a micro-hydroelectric power installation, oodles of military grade weaponry, and all sorts of hugely expensive engineering works.


There should be no focus on the vampires in this book, they almost have nothing to do with it.

[Jaevric]

white_rabbit:

I'm not disagreeing -- the book is "paint-by-numbers" bad alien invasion sci fi. It has F-22 Raptor wank. It has .50 Barrett wank (lots of this). It has Abrams wank. It even has P-90 wank along with the obligatory geek-cred references to Stargate. It has the salute to how totally awesome right-wing American rednecks are compared to everyone else, and how being a right-wing redneck who owns a bunker up in the mountains doesn't make you crazy, it just makes you "well-prepared." Honestly, even without the ending, the book would be unremarkable trash.

But, in my opinion, the ending pushes it from "Man that was a lousy book" to "WTF did I just read and is it too late to get my money back?" "And then, Count Dracula and his merry band of vampire commandos use l33t vampire powers to infiltrate all the alien bases, rip all their dudes apart bare-handed, and board their starships by hanging off the outside of shuttles and kill all the dudes on the ships before turning the ship's guns on the other alien vessels and leaving to go blow up their home planets. Cuz vampires are awesome like that. The end."

[spartasman]

I almost bought this book twice, thank god the price scared my cheap-ass away.

[Gil Hamilton]

Wait, Dracula? That's so random!

Of course, that's not how the book should have ended. Dracula should capture the aliens fleet and go to their homeworld, but they are quickly surrounded by the aliens forces and, despite the fact that Dracula combines the AWESOME of being human with the AWSUM of being vampire and thus can expertly command a fleet of alien battlecruisers, they get overwhelmed as alien ships literally clog their guns with their ruined hulks.

Then, as Dracula's ship is burning all around, his vampire crew slumped over their consoles, and a ceiling beam is hanging across the command deck for some reason, Vlad pulls out from under his cloak a spiky metal bat shaped walkie-talkie and simply utters a single word; "Now." Then, he moves the queen on a chess set that's been in front of him the whole time but not disturbed by the carnage and takes a rook next to the king on the other side.

Suddenly, a giant starship that is nothing but HUGE spike covered skull appears! OMG! It's Dethklok! They survived! Due to vampi-human ingenuity, they've wired the modified alien battleships tactical computer into their instruments (and also into Murderface's disembodied head, which is all explained in the prequel) and they have the most BRUTAL space battle EVER. Glowing orange laser beams sweep through alien warships, causing them to explode instantaneously! Giant cauldrons of boiling pitch pour, yes pour! from orbit down onto the aliens homework, causing the aliens to turn into flaming skeletons than then scream in horror! HOLY SHIT THERE'S THAT CHICK FROM HEAVY METAL THAT RODE THE PIGEON DINOSAUR THING! AND THEN THE WHOLE PLANET EXPLODES!. Dracula then smirks and goes "Checkmate...", because he had planned this all along, and by "all along" I mean since he was a Prince in Wallachia in the 15th century as an elaborate way to get revenge on the Ottomon Empire, which the aliens are a thinly vieled duplicate of.

*frantically masturbates as he ends the book with a frantic drug induced rant about how awesome the show "Metaloclypse" was, but that it needed more Janassaries*

[spartasman]

Well shit, if that's how it had ended, I would have definitely have bought it.

[aerius]

So, normally being a Weber fan and fairly tolerant of his undeniable flaws as an author, I got desperate over the holidays and picked up a copy of this novel.

Short version: Don't pay money for it. It's cliched as hell and the ending is so freaking bizarre I have to wonder if Weber has suffered serious brain damage as a result of excessive exposure to John Ringo. The novel has heavy doses of "America, fuck yeah!" and "rednecks with guns fighting the good fight against alien invaders." If you absolutely must read this, wait until it's available at the library. Also, I heartily recommend alcohol use prior, during, and after reading.

As a John Ringo fan, I thought this book was a massive improvement over Weber's recent works. I don't have to slog through 150 pages while waiting for shit to happen and people to get killed, it cuts out most of the boring background trivia and gets to the action a lot faster. And the damn book isn't 800 pages long.