Star Trek Paint Adventure

[Instant Sunrise]

You are CAPTAIN JEAN-LUC PICARD of the FEDERATION STARSHIP ENTERPRISE. You are currently on the BRIDGE of the Enterprise. You have just left Starbase 47, and are current patrolling outside THE NEUTRAL ZONE.

Next to you is your executive officer COMMANDER WILLIAM T. RIKER and at the helm is your robot buddy, LIEUTENANT COMMANDER DATA.

What will you do?

[Chardok]

I say

"Data! Plot a course for Starbase 1, Warp 7! Then punch Riker in the balls."

"Number 1 - you will, without protest, allow Commander Data to punch you in the balls."

[Nieztchean Uber-Amoeba]

quickly retrieve arms from replicator

[The Vortex Empire]

Tell Riker to shave off that pencil thin douchebag beard and grow a real mans beard, like that one he had back when it was live action.

[atg]

quickly retrieve arms from replicator

You've already got arms, numbnuts!

[Uraniun235]

"scan the neutral zone, mr. data"

[Instant Sunrise]

I say

"Data! Plot a course for Starbase 1, Warp 7! Then punch Riker in the balls."

"Number 1 - you will, without protest, allow Commander Data to punch you in the balls."

Data doesn't know what the fuck

quickly retrieve arms from replicator

You've already got arms numbnuts!

Tell Riker to shave off that pencil thin douchebag beard and grow a real mans beard, like that one he had back when it was live action.

you have hurt Riker's feelings, he runs off the bridge.

"scan the neutral zone, mr. data"

Data begins the scan of the neutral zone. He says it will take several hours.

You are being hailed by another ship.

[atg]

You are being hailed by another ship.

Reverse the polarity of the photon modulator in the deflector dish to create some fireworks that say "wut up"

[Chardok]

Hail the ship back!

[The Vortex Empire]

tell riker over the intercom that he'd better have a real beard next time I see him or he's getting spaced

order the crew of the ship to point and laugh at rikers shameful ways

[OmegaChief]

Order Mr Data to press the Large Red Button on his console... no not that one, the one just to the left.

[Instant Sunrise]

Hail the ship back!

It is THE ROMULANS. They are demanding that you assist them in locating another source of shoulderpads, or else there will be another war with the federation.

[Nieztchean Uber-Amoeba]

Get Data to sew some shoulderpads for the Romulans

[atg]

Time travel to the 1980s.

[Instant Sunrise]

Get Data to sew some shoulderpads for the Romulans

Data does not know how to sew shoulderpads.

Time travel to the 1980s.

MAKE.
IT.
SO.

[Instant Sunrise]

You arrive in 1980.


However, there is a BIRD OF PREY headed towards Earth.

What will you do?

[OmegaChief]

Quickly fire on the Bird of prey, therefore preventing a hostile klingon takeover of poor defencless earth.

[The Vortex Empire]

After the bird of prey is destroyed, bring the whole crew to a Judas Priest concert on their british steel tour

[Chardok]

Hail the Klingon ship, and tell the captain and the entire Klingon crew that they have been granted extended shore leave, but they have to make it back to q'onos in like 12 hours. There is also cake.

[Instant Sunrise]

Hail the Klingon ship, and tell the captain and the entire Klingon crew that they have been granted extended shore leave, but they have to make it back to q'onos in like 12 hours. There is also cake.

You order Mister Data to hail the ship.





















The bird of prey has been destroyed. Everybody aboard it was killed.

[Chardok]

"I am disappointed in you, Mister Data. You are relieved and confined to quarters."

"Number 1 - Please tell me a joke while I wait for the narrator to tell me what is happening now."

[aerius]

Call Counsellor Troi to the bridge and retire to the ready room for some counselling.

[FaxModem1]

Use the scanners to locate a shoulder pads warehouse and beam aboard enough shoulder pads to fill up all the cargo bays.

Once that's done, time travel back to the 24th century to give the Romulans their new shoulder pads.

[Instant Sunrise]

MEANWHILE IN SPACE


An ANGRY ADMIRAL floats towards the Enterprise, his stolen spaceship, destroyed.

[The Vortex Empire]

RAMMING SPEED TOWARDS THAT TINY MAN