Let's play: SCRAMming up!

[Eternal_Freedom]

EXPLAIN to ZIXINUS that NARROWLY AVOIDING my OWN BODY shows TRUE SKILL, as I can MANUEVRE the WEAPON VERY PRECISELY and CONFIDENTLY.
Spoiler

I'm including "Weapons skills" under my "Badassery" expiernce points thing. Basically, the "Badassery" skill includes combat skills, stubborness, resilience and piloting awesomeness.

[Simon_Jester]

STAND BY to go all COMMISSAR on MILDLY DERANGED PHYSICIST.

"Not one step back, comrade!"

"I'm not retreating! I'm luring them into a false sense of security, to override their true sense of security coming from them having guns and us having swords!"

[FaxModem1]

WCDG takes NICKEL PLATED PISTOL from ETERNAL FREEDOM and finds a GOOD HIDING SPOT to HIDE in.

[Force Lord]

FIND some COVER behind the TRUCK.

[PeZook]

February 23rd 2025
Sunday



Abandoned airbase
Somewhere in Papua New Guinea

ROUND 5

You are now: ZIXINUS, ETERNAL FREEDOM, PHANT, WHITE CHINESE DELIVERY GUY, RI'ANN SHAPP, LARGE IRRITABLE DOG, COMBAT JANITOR, SMARMY AMERICAN SAILOR, TROPICAL BEAUTY, IVAN IVANOV and MILDLY DERANGED PHYSICIST.

You are no longer SICK. You have RECOVERED from TEAR GAS POISONING.

You are in a JUNGLE. There is an OLD HANGAR. There is a slab of TARMAC and a RUNWAY. There is a SPACEPLANE. The SPACEPLANE is MAGNIFICENT. It is MORNING. It is getting HOT again. There is SOUND of multiple ENGINES from the JUNGLE.

There is a SUDDEN CHEMICAL CRISIS. ZIXINUS is YELLING at PEOPLE to GET AWAY GET AWAY. He BRAVES the HANGAR to INSPECT the HYDRAZINE HOSE. It is SHUT DOWN. ZIXINUS DRAGS WHITE CHINESE DELIVERY GUY outside the HANGAR and ADMINISTERS some FIRST AID.

ZIXINUS Says: Hey, does anybody else hear anything?

COMBAT JANITOR CACKLES

WHITE CHINESE DELIVERY GUY WAKES UP and STAND UP on SHAKY LEGS. He EXTRACTS his CELL PHONE and SUDDENLY REMEMBERS something.

WHITE CHINESE DELIVERY GUY Says: SHIT! The pilot!

WHITE CHINESE DELIVERY GUY RUNS back into the HANGAR. He COLLAPSES again due to RESIDENT FUMES of HYDRAZINE.

He is CARRIED outside by ETERNAL FREEDOM who is BADASS enough to SURVIVE HYDRAZINE EXPOSURE.

ETERNAL FREEDOM is QUITE badass but still COLLAPSES from the STRAIN and COUGHS some more BLOOD. ZIXINUS attempts to CONTROL the SITUATION with a rapidly DEPLETING MEDKIT.

COMBAT JANITOR CACKLES

RI'ANN SHAPP APPEARS near the UNHOLY MESS. RI'ANN SHAPP is CARRYING the LARGE IRRITABLE DOG and ASKING for HELP. He GARNERS some INTEREST from TROPICAL BEAUTY and SMARMY AMERICAN SAILOR. SMARMY AMERICAN SAILOR administers some BASIC FIRST AID and STOPS the BLEEDING with FIRE.

TROPICAL BEAUTY appears ENAMORED with SMARMY AMERICAN SAILOR and his RUGGED SELF RELIANCE. She begins to CHATTER at him. It is quite FLITRATIOUS.

ENORMOUS PANIC is INVITED by SUAVE PLAYBOY.

ENORMOUS PANIC Says: Hello boys

ENORMOUS PANIC SITS DOWN for a SMOKE near the PRESSURIZED TANKS. It APPEARS to be WAITING for SOMETHING.

COMBAT JANITOR CACKLES

QUIET HISTORIAN keeps EXPLAINING HIMSELF. He YELLS something about TIGERS, adding to the OVERALL CONFUSION.

There is an UNHOLY MESS. People are RUNNING AROUND. The MILDLY DERANGED PHYSICIST HIDES in the BUSHES with an ASSAULT SLIDERULE. He is ACCOSTED by IVAN IVANOV and SCREAMED at.

WHITE CHINESE DELIVERY GUY manages to SOMEHOW find a PAIR of NICKEL PLATED PISTOLS. He PREPARES to FACE DOWN the POTENTIAL ATTACKERS or the TIGER but REALIZES he has no AMMUNITION.

ETERNAL FREEDOM has WOKEN UP. ETERNAL FREEDOM RIPS his SHIRT and WAVES a LARGE BLADE around in the AIR like a LUNATIC.

A TIGER LEAPS out of the JUNGLE. The TIGER is ANGRY. It POUNCES without WARNING on ETERNAL FREEDOM.

COMBAT JANITOR CACKLES

A DIRT BIKE appears. It is CARRYING two PEOPLE. The PEOPLE are ARMED with OBSCENELY LARGE KNIVES. You are RELIEVED at your NUMERICAL SUPERIORITY.

A PICK-UP TRUCK APPEARS right BEHIND the DIRT BIKE. It is CARRYING a DOZEN people. The PEOPLE are ARMED with KNIVES, CLUBS and some GUNS. They are LED by a SKINNY GUY. The SKINNY GUY looks REALLY MEAN. SUAVE PLAYBOY WHIMPERS as he RECOGNIZES the OLDEST BROTHER of TROPICAL BEAUTY.

The ANGRY MOB quickly DISMOUNTS and starts YELLING at you in their LOCAL LANGUAGE. TROPICAL BEAUTY is SCARED and HUGS SMARMY AMERICAN SAILOR. Very CLOSELY. SKINNY GUY huffs like an ANGRY BULL upon SEEING THAT.

ENORMOUS PANIC GETS UP, FLICKS the CIGARETTE away and CRACKS its KNUCKLES.

COMBAT JANITOR CACKLES

What do you do? _

[MKSheppard]

LARGE IRRITABLE DOG WHIMPERS AND MOANS AS I HOLD HIM. HE DOES NOT LIKE THE NEW ARRIVALS AND IS STILL FEELING UNDER THE WEATHER.

I NOTICE the arrival of TRUCK FULL OF ARMED LOCALS.

I pull out the POOP STAINED PHONE and photograph the truck, sending the picture to CHEYENNE MOUNTAIN.

[Zixinus]

KICK PANIC IN THE NUTS and START SHOUTING INCOHERENTLY AT WCDG, SAILOR, TROPICAL BEAUTY and BUSH.
OCCASIONALLY INCLUDE the words "this is a distraction, think of something quickly" into inane yet loud RANT.

[Zixinus]

OOC: Crap, edit time is shorter than I thought. I wanted to modify my last message to this:

USE GUILE to INITIATE DISTRACTION against PANIC and TRIBESMEN.

START a SHOUTING, INCOHERENT RANT to be the CENTER OF ATTENTION. OCCASIONALLY QUICKLY include the words "this is a distraction, think of something quickly". OCCASIONALLY DIRECT INCOHERENT RANT against SAILOR, PLAYBOY, TOWARDS TRIBESMEN and RANDOM BUSH.

[FaxModem1]

WHITE CHINESE DELIVERY GUY has an IDEA. He goes up to SKINNY GUY and offers EXCHANGE. TROPICAL BEAUTY can go back with the group and WCDG will go back to the VILLAGE, because the first proposal is always struck down. The second proposal is that SKINNY GUY finds out what WCDG can do with his fingers in the RIGHT PLACES on SKINNY GUY's body.

SKINNY GUY now has INFINITE PLEASURE and is now OBEYING WCDG's COMMANDS.

[Eternal_Freedom]

WRESTLE with TIGER. USING BADASS COMBAT SKILLS, KICK TIGER in the BALLS, then DECAPITATE with PARANG.

THROW BLOODY TIGER HEAD at ARMED LOCALS as a SHOW OF AWESOMNESS.

[Darkevilme]

SUAVE PLAYBOY sees TROPICAL BEAUTY suddenly all over SMARMY AMERICAN SAILOR and loses CONFIDENCE in his POWERS OF CHARM.

Then SUAVE PLAYBOY realizes this might mean he can avoid the terrifying event of MARRIAGE and thus he hides in one of the RUINED BUILDINGS.

[Zixinus]

STOP SHOUTING LIKE A MANIAC. REALIZES what is truly going on: this isn't about TROPICAL BEAUTY but a HUNTING PARTY.

USE MIXTURE of PÁLINKA and UNHOLY MIXTURE by SPRAYING IT at TIGER to KNOCK IT OUT. HELP ETERNAL FREEDOM KILLING IT.

[Simon_Jester]

MILDLY DERANGED PHYSICIST also tries to HELP KAMIKAZE SPACE PILOT. AFTER ZIXINUS launches CHEMICAL ATTACK, PHYSICIST retrieves HIGH VOLTAGE LOGIC PROBE and sets it to "TAZER VOLTAGE." RUSHES TIGER while it is DISTRACTED by HEADLOCK OF ETERNAL FREEDOM and PÁLINKA-INDUCED BLINDNESS and TAZERS IT, making it WAY EASIER TO DECAPITATE.

HOPEFULLY.

[Zixinus]

Spoiler

We are going to end up hitting each other, aren't we?

[PeZook]

Spoiler

In short...

Yes

[Simon_Jester]

Spoiler

Ouch. In my defense, I did say I was launching my tazer attack after Zixinus's chemical attack...

Eh, well. Whatever's funny.

[PeZook]

Spoiler

Yes, but there's three people now fighting the tiger.

[Shroom Man 777]

FARTS a GROTESQUE BREEZE DOWNWIND towards the GENERAL DIRECTION of the TIGER and the MOTORIZED TRIBESMEN with SUCH A STRENGTH and SUCH HORRER that MY PANTS TURN BLACK AND DRIP WET FROM THE CONSEQUENT EXCRETIONS

[Eternal_Freedom]

Spoiler

Hey, I already kicked it in the nuts , decapitated it, and threw the head at the locals. I had no need for assitance. You guys are just beating the dead tiger. No wodner it doesn't react to the taser attack

[PeZook]

February 23rd 2025
Sunday



Abandoned airbase
Somewhere in Papua New Guinea

ROUND 6

You are now: ZIXINUS, ETERNAL FREEDOM, PHANT, WHITE CHINESE DELIVERY GUY, RI'ANN SHAPP, LARGE IRRITABLE DOG, COMBAT JANITOR, SMARMY AMERICAN SAILOR, TROPICAL BEAUTY, IVAN IVANOV and MILDLY DERANGED PHYSICIST.

You are no longer SICK. You have RECOVERED from TEAR GAS POISONING.

You are in a JUNGLE. There is an OLD HANGAR. There is a slab of TARMAC and a RUNWAY. There is a SPACEPLANE. The SPACEPLANE is MAGNIFICENT. It is MORNING. It really HOT again. There is an ANGRY MOB at the EDGE of the TARMAC. There is a TIGER. It is VERY ANGRY. The is PANIC. The PANIC is ENORMOUS.

Everything EXPLODES into VIOLENCE when ZIXINUS kicks ENORMOUS PANIC in the NUTS. ENORMOUS PANIC swiftly RETALIATES by HEADBUTTING ZIXINUS and PULLING on his GRAND MOUSTACHE.

COMBAT JANITOR CACKLES

ZIXINUS begins to BABBLE INCOHERENTLY. He has succesfully DISTRACTED ENORMOUS PANIC and the ANGRY MOB.

ETERNAL FREEDOM begins to WRESTE with a GODDAMN TIGER using his BARE HANDS and an OVERSIZED BLADE. He is ROARING like a FUCKING MANIAC and going BALLS OUT.

ZIXINUS manages to DISENGAGE from ENORMOUS PANIC and PROCEEDS to HELP ETERNAL FREEDOM. He POURS a MIX of UNHOLY HUNGARIAN MIXTURE and PALINKA all OVER the TIGER. MILDLY DERANGED PHYSICIST arrives in the NICk of TIME and JABS the GODDAMNED TIGER with his LOGIC PROBE. He STUMBLES and FALLS on the GODDAMNED TIGER.

ETERNAL FREEDOM, TIGER, ZIXINUS and MILDLY DERANGED PHYSICIST are SET on FIRE. It is VERY PAINFUL.

WHITE CHINESE DELIVERY GUY APPROACHES the ANGRY MOB and MAKES a PROPOSAL to SKINNY GUY.

SKINNY GUY does not UNDERSTAND the PROPOSAL due to the LANGUAGE DIFFERENCE and PUNCHES WHITE CHINESE DELIVERY GUY in the FACE while YELLING at SMARMY AMERICAN SAILOR. The ANGRY MOB begins to MOVE towards SMARMY AMERICAN SAILOR but are DISTRACTED by the TIGER FIGHT.

They are AMAZED at the SUDDEN FIRE and CRIES of PAIN. They STOP in CONFUSION.

COMBAT JANITOR CACKLES

COMBAT JANITOR emits a MIGHTY FART. The STENCH WAFTS over the FIGHT and DISPERSES the ANGRY MOB. TROPICAL BEAUTY is DISGUSTED and BARELY contains an URGE to PUKE. SKINNY GUY COLLAPSES to the GROUND calling for his MOMMY.

The FART CLOUD WAFTS over the BURNING MEN and EXPLODES.

It is VERY PAINFUL.

COMBAT JANITOR CACKLES

What do you do? _

[Simon_Jester]

MILDLY DERANGED PHYSICIST starts ROLLING AROUND on the GROUND in attempt to STOP BEING ON FIRE. ALSO attempts to ROLL OUT OF HORRIBLE FART CLOUD, or what's left of it.

PHYSICIST is shouting "AAAH! Aaah! It stinks! It burns! It WARPS ZE SPACE-TIME CONTINUUM with its flaming stenchness! AAAAH!"

PHYSICIST HOPES that we at least TOOK DOWN the TIGER in the CONFUSION.

[Eternal_Freedom]

STAND. Thanks to BADASSERY, IGNORE the fact that my BACK and ARMS are on FIRE. CHARGE at the REMAINGING NATIVES. TERRIFY them with my MIGHTY BATTLE CRY, OVERSIZED BLADE stained with TIGER BLOOD, TIGER HEAD in other hand, and FLAMING BODY.

NATIVES POSSIBLY see me as some kind of GOD.

[Scottish Ninja]

LAUNCH an ATTACK from the REAR on the NOW-DISPERSED MOB, after DRINKING enough VODKA to temporarily DEADEN my SENSE of SMELL.

FOCUS on those with GUNS. Start TOSSING GUNS to any ALLIES in GOOD ENOUGH CONDITION to not SHOOT THEMSELVES when they CATCH THEM.

[Zixinus]

HAPPILY NOTE THAT FLIGHT SUIT I AM WEARING IS FLAMEPROOF.

DIVE INTO NEARBY CONVENIENT PUDDLE OF WATER TO IMMEDIATELY EXTINGUISH FLAMES with ALMOST NO DAMAGE TO MYSELF. PULL ETERNAL FREEDOM WITH ME so HE GETS THE SAME TREATMENT.
GLADLY NOTE that my MAGNIFICENT MUSTACHE has SUFFERED NO DAMAGE.

BRING CARCASS of TIGER with the HELP OF ETERNAL FREEDOM IN-FRONT of SKINNY MAN. MAKE a BIG CRY OF TRIUMPH AT VICTORY OVER TIGER. IMPRESS SKINNY MAN with OUR BROISH HUNTING PROWESS.

WHILE BEEFED UP, PROCEED TO GO AND BEAT THE LIVING SHIT OUT OF PANIC.

[Eternal_Freedom]

Spoiler

It's more terrifying to the locals if I am still on fire. My Badassery and the flameproof flight suit will keep me safe untilt he situation abates.