Let's Play: TEAM L.A.M.E.

[Simon_Jester]

You are now: REPAIR GUY, SPACE PILOT, MR MAISNER, HISOTRIAN, JANITOR, MILDLY DERANGED PHYSICIST, LARGE SEDATED DOG and CULTIST.

CULTISt has TELEPORTED into the HANGER, from the STRANGE PLACE where he USED TO BE. There is much SURPRISE at this TURN OF EVENTS.

MILDLY DERANGED PHYSICIST shouts "YOU!" and charges at CULTIST. Attempts to make CULTIST perform SCREAM LIKE A BITCH AND RUN AWAY maneuver, using ASSAULT SLIDE RULE and HIGH VOLTAGE LOGIC PROBE.

His battle-cry: "FOR SCIENCE!"

[doom3607]

Spoiler

Remember, CULTIST is presently bullet- and knife-proof. I think he can resist the assault slide rule and high voltage logic probe. Then again, he may not be 100% resistant to the logic probe for the humour value of zapping him a bit.

[Eternal_Freedom]

Spoiler

CULTIST is bullet and stab proof. He is not however shock-proof. PHYSICIST, shock away

[Zixinus]

List of firearms brought:

1xS&W 640 revolver with lasergrip
- with a box of .357 magnum hollowpoint (25 rounds)
- box of glaser safety slug rounds (25 rounds)
- IWP holster for concealed carry
- speedloader

1xDesert Eagle
- box of .50 action express rounds (25 rounds)
- two empty magazines
- matching hip holster

1x Vepr12 shotgun (because FIREARMS DEALER does not have that much foreign guns made almost a century ago), mainly as an emergency weapon aboard the RAVENSTAR
- two empty magazines
- 1 box of slugs (20 round)
- 1 box of buckshot (20 rounds)
- 1 box of beanbags (20 rounds)
- attachable flashlight

3x Grach (MP-443) (for other crewmembers and as spares)
- each with two empty magazines
- 2 boxes of standard 9x19 NATO (that's 100 rounds total)
- each with attachable flashlights
- each with appropriate hip holster (holster has space for spare magazine)

Ammunition for REPAIR GUY'S PISTOLS [50 rounds]

1x AK-74u (sort of came at a discount from FIREARMS DEALER, I've brought it in case of need of hangar defense), weapon is old but serviceable condition
- two magazines
- 200 rounds
- attachable flashlight
- POPS optical scope
- sling

1x FLARE GUN, for emergency landings
- box containing gun and ammunition, box is watertight and floats
- box contains 3 of RED, BLUE and GREEN flares.
- 1 pyro-flare, a flare meant to give off high-temperature igniting sparks instead of light

I'll write my other responces later, once I have some sleep.

[Simon_Jester]

MILDLY DERANGED PHYSICIST begins TAZING CULTIST with the HIGH VOLTAGE LOGIC PROBE. It hurts.

"You! Begone! Trouble us no more with your absurd cheatery and pretensions to understand hidden truths!"

[doom3607]

CULTIST ZAPS the CLEARLY INSANE PHYSICIST right back.

[FaxModem1]

REPAIR GUY groans as he tries to repair things. He sticks his head out of the SPACEPLANE.

"HEY, TWEEDLE DUM AND TWEEDLE DEE! Do something useful and help fix the plane or take it outside the hangar."

REPAIR GUY then orders whatever other PARTS are needed on the INTERNET.

[Zixinus]

Now, on what I did:

RECEIVING the CALL from REPAIR GUY, I tell him that he should look at how to get the hydraulics fixed and refuelling the ship.

AT THE FIREARS DEALER, I load my REVOLVER with .357 hollowpoints. Also, I load the Vepr12 with beanbag rounds.

At ARRIVAL, I shoot the CULTIST with BEANBAG ROUNDS.

IN THE ASS.

[doom3607]

CULTIST has MAGICAL BODY ARMOR currently. He is IMMUNE to BULLETS. Of ANY variety.

[Simon_Jester]

Spoiler

[Awaits DM resolution of opening round of fighting]

[Zixinus]

CULTIST has MAGICAL BODY ARMOR currently. He is IMMUNE to BULLETS. Of ANY variety.

It will still transmit kinetic shock, which is the point.

[Eternal_Freedom]

SUMMARY of RECENT EVENTS:

ZIXINUS has BOUGHT NUMEROUS FIREARMS from the DEALER and RETURNED to the HANGER with IVAN. ZIXINUS has LOADED the VEPR with BEANBAG ROUNDS.

The PHYSICIST is LOCKED IN COMBAT with the CULTIST. CULTIST was INITIALLY SMUG thanks to his MGAICAL BODY ARMOUR. This SMUGNESS DISSAPPEARED when PHYSICIST uses HIGH VOLTAGE LOGIC PROBE.

MAGICAL BODY ARMOUR DOES NOT PROTECT against HIGH VOLTAGE LOGIC PROBE. CULTIST SUFFERS CONSIDERABLE PAIN. CULTIST RETALIATES against PHYSICIST.

SPACE PILOT is APPROACHING the MELEE.

ZIXINUS RETURNS and SHOOTS the CULTIST in the ASS with a BEANBAG ROUND. CULTIST LAUGHS as he IS PROTECTED, the ROUND causes SOME PAIN but THAT'S ALL, but this DISTRACTS HIM from a HEFTY PUNCH to the FACE from the PILOT. This STUNS the CULTIST, as MAGICAL BODY ARMOUR is of NO USE against PHYSICAL IMPACTS to the HEAD and GROIN.

He is then RESTRAINED alogn with Mr MAISNER, until HE CAN EXPLAIN HIS PRESENCE HERE.

[FaxModem1]

"Right, so I'm ordering the Hydraulics, I hope they're cheap."

REPAIR GUY buys HYDRAULICS from online store.

[Simon_Jester]

"I say we throw him to the dogs again- he's obviously continuing his stowaway ways!"

[Eternal_Freedom]

"Calm yourself physicist. We should let him explain himself first. We can always execute him later if needs be. Or leave him with the Russian."

[Zixinus]

TIE UP CULTIST.

REMOVE ALL HIS POSSESSIONS, including ARMOR.

GIVE DESERT EAGLE with AMMO and ACCESSORIES to ETERNAL FREEDOM.

GIVE AMMUNITION to REPAIR GUY (hope it's the correct kind).
While at it, ask him how does he plan to do the repairs. I thought he would ask the locals for repairs, rather than order parts on the Internet. IVAN PYOTREVICH does offer cleaning and repairs.

[Eternal_Freedom]

COMMENt to ZIXINUS: "Perhaps he intends to get the locals to carry out the repairs, but felt it best t order the parts himself. And thanks for the gun man."

[FaxModem1]

"This is libertarian Russia, prices are either too cheap because the parts are faulty, or too expensive because they want too much of a profit because they now they have the only good ones in the area. Going online is the only way to bypass that.

As for people to help repair the spaceplane, we can get that in abundance, as long as we have people armed to make sure no one takes off with a souvenir."

REPAIR thanks Zixnius for the AMMO and checks to make sure its the right kind. If it is, he loads both pistols with them.

If not, he gives them back and tells him what ammo he needs.

[Eternal_Freedom]

DM: It is the right kind of ammo. Everybody is now armed. Excellent.

[Zixinus]

Decide not to argue with REPAIR GUY about wisdom of ordering online. We've appointed him to the job, might as well let him do it.

Now that we are armed, APPROACH COMBAT JANITOR and HISTORIAN.

"Tell me good sirs, cleanser of filth and scholar of history, how do you feel about mounting on to a quest? For we would like to sleep more soundly tonight by making a charge into the heart of darkness, into the dark cellar where unknown creatures lurk. Fear not, for I have brought you might weapons to aid you, complete with grue-repellent."

HAND OVER GARCHES with AMMO and ACCESSORIES to PAIR.

LEAVE HALF of MONEY here with ETERNAL FREEDOM and REPAIR GUY for spaceplane things.

CHECK ON DOG.

Go with other half to buy other supplies.

[doom3607]

Spoiler

You can't take the armor, it's non-physical. It's... basically a shield, although it doesn't seem to block much.

[Scottish Ninja]

Trade in the KALASHNIKOV for the AKS-74U. Return the KALASHNIKOV to SPACE PILOT.

Put INSANE CULTIST in a HEAD LOCK.

[Simon_Jester]

Spoiler

You can't take the armor, it's non-physical. It's... basically a shield, although it doesn't seem to block much.

MILDLY DERANGED PHYSICIST begins examining MAGIC WANK ARMOR carefully and TAKING NOTES. The NOTES include numerous STRANGE GEOMETRIC DIAGRAMS, WIGGLY LINES, and CHARACTERS in languages that no one else present, even CULTIST, knows.

His DOC BROWN HAIR is starting to revive again. He appears to be GOING SLIGHTLY MORE MAD.

He periodically PRIES at the MAGIC WANK ARMOR with his ASSAULT SLIDE RULE. It is SOMEWHAT UNCOMFORTABLE. And SOMEWHAT UNNERVING.

[Force Lord]

Now that we are armed, APPROACH COMBAT JANITOR and HISTORIAN.

"Tell me good sirs, cleanser of filth and scholar of history, how do you feel about mounting on to a quest? For we would like to sleep more soundly tonight by making a charge into the heart of darkness, into the dark cellar where unknown creatures lurk. Fear not, for I have brought you might weapons to aid you, complete with grue-repellent."

HAND OVER GARCHES with AMMO and ACCESSORIES to PAIR.

"Fear not, for with these weapons, we shall cleanse the cellar of foul scum."

HISTORIAM MOTIONS COMBAT JANITOR to go join him to the BASEMENT ENTRANCE.

[FaxModem1]

REPAIR GUY looks to ETERNAL FREEDOM.

"Did we become an order of knights and no one told me?"