Moosecow, Zenobia
Secret Politburo meeting
The spacious meeting room that usually held Politburo meetings had been sealed. Many of the seats were empty today, for this was a most
unusual meeting, where only a select few members would preside over a matter of utmost importance.
It did not escape the attention of the gathered that the room was conspiciously lacking in those members who supported Shroomanski. And that comrade Bragonid Bearzhnev, the Chairman of the Supreme Soviet, was sitting on the seat usually reserved for the General Secretary.
"Comrades", Bearzhnev began, not giving anyone much time to think things through and come to the inevitable conclusion before he made his pitch, "I have asked you to attend this special meeting today to discuss matters of national importance. You are smart men, and so I will not cloud your judgement with nice words: I believe the general secretary is growing more erratic, perhaps even senile, and that his decisions no longer serve the interests of the Zenobian Onion. It has become imperative that the man is removed from his post."
"Comrade Bearzhnev", Pavel Gugylyvych, People's Comissar for Agriculture, butted in to Leznev's great annoyance, "While we have no great love for the general secretary and his decisions, particularly his irrational love for corn, surely you must understand sweeping policy changes cannot be decided at closed meetings."
General Robyodov Nefartnyi, head of the NKVDVDROM snorted, "I disagree, comrade. The good of the Onion takes precedence over proper procedure."
"Yes, well, it's not like the general secretary will just disappear, like those fools who stand in front of a mirror and chant 'Stas Bush' three times, da?", the Comissar for Agriculture spat back at the general, "Even the NVKDVDROM needs evidence of wrongdoing to convict the General Secretary!"
"Comrades! Please! Allow me to finish. Thanks to comrade Nefartnyi's efforts, I have managed to gain access to documentations received by the general secretary, relating to the space program..."
"Again with the space program, Bragonid?", the Comissar for Industry, a very old and very dried out man by the name of Dryzdyn Spetchkov, also seemed hostile. Probably because he was called to the meeting from a public bathhouse full of nubile young naked women, "We should've shut it down a long time ago! It's a waste of money and resources!"
"Perhaps it is, but here is why! I have here a letter from doctor von Evilstein, who as you might remember is the head of the program...", Bearzhnev fished around in his briefcase for a moment, before pulling out a sheet of paper. He put on his readin glasses and read the letter aloud.
Comrade General Secretary of the Zenobian Onion, I must regretfully give you news of the gravest variety. I fear the good Commisar may... not be as dedicated to the cause as he should be. I have in my possesion information showing that the Commisar was aware that Comrade Pavylyvych failed to fully inspect the paperwork for the rocket that exploded on Pad Two, and that if he had, the explosion would have failed to happen. (A copy of the information is attached.) And yet, the good Commisar supported Comrade Pavylyvych, the man who caused an explosion on the launch pad, over myself, the man who got two satellites into orbit and beat the Murcan capitalist swine in doing so. And shortly thereafter, as you've undoubtedly already heard, Comrade Pavylyvych signed off on a plan for the Vostok capsule that set us back to almost Murcan reliability levels, possibly losing us the race to get a man up there! And he plans to go 'slowly and steadily', like he was doing when he signed off on this plan, permanently. I fear his apparent fondness for red tape may be preventing him from being capable of doing his duties, and the good Commisar supports him anyway. I apologize for taking up any of your valuable time, but I felt you had to be aware of my misgivings in this matter.
"This letter had been received by the General Secretary months ago, yet was not presented to the Politburo! The Secretary is obviously protecting a chosen protege of his, this Syrgy Pavylyvych, a former Gulag prisoner..."
"Wait just a minute. This does look like a simple denunciation, doesn't it?", Comissar Gugylyvych noted, "I don't know about the space program, but..."
Dryzdyn Spetchkov slammed a fist into the table in a surprising display of strength, "That's precisely it, comrade Gugylyvych! You do
not know much about the program, but the situation presented in the letter does seem to match reports I am getting. Sloppiness, inadequately dedicated work, rockets exploding on the pad! That's exactly it?"
Gugylyvych nodded angrily, "Yes, yes, I know, da? But is it due to this...Syrgy Pavylyvych character? Perhaps von Evilstein, being a former Thanasian slave driver after all, is simply trying to cover his ass? How does this prove comrade Shroomanski is negligent, Bragonid?"
"Does it matter, comrades? Von Evilstein stans against Shroomanski, and this is all we need."
"How do you know where Pavylyvych stands, Bragonid?", Gugylyvych pointed out, showing just why he wasn't given a more important post than comissar of agriculture. Shroomanski probably feared his ability to pinpoint inconvenient details like this.
"We can find out", Spetchkov said, rubbing his pruny chin, "We should ask him what he thinks of the general secretary. I would also very much like to hear von Evilstein's plan for the future of the space program."
"I agree", general Nefartnyi said, "If we are to use this situation against comrade Shroomanski, we have to be well prepared. What happenes if von Evilstein's letter is actually a denunciation, and the program under his lead starts failing? That could threaten the next general secretary, who would after all be climbing to the top on promises to clean it up!"
"Da. Comrade Spetchkov should meet with Syrgy Pavylyvych, and see where his loyalties lie."
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