Insults

Tom_Aurum · Post by **Tom_Aurum** » 2003-02-28 04:04pm

Just as a disclaimer, this topic is most likely going to become a flamefest, based on the pure topic.

Having been the brunt of a whole series of them in middle school, high school, I've had a lot of time to think about them, and I've wondered exactly <why> we use them. I've noticed a whole bunch of different sorts of insults.

1) Insults that are simple, childish marking of territory, expected to make a two year old cry and walk off

2) Insults that are meant to make you do suppsedly stupid things... word traps like "assphinctersayswhat?"

3) Involved, serious ones that are actually meant to leave yoo sitting there.. quivering, questioning your own existence.

There are only a sample of them. But the third type I have rarely run into, more accidentally spoken by one of my freinds. Anyways, I've come to the conclusion that the more effective an insult is, the more often it has the following elements. First of all, an effective insult actually uses no swear words at all. Second, an effective insult tends to stick more to the truth... or at least a stretch of the truth. Third one must stick to these two above qualities while still managing to be breif. So, what do you think?

neoolong · Post by **neoolong** » 2003-02-28 04:12pm

I would say to ridicule, ie to make the person acknowledge is stupidity, or to make yourself feel better, or to just be mean. Depends on whether the person deserves it or not.

I'm sure there are other reasons.

jegs2 · Post by **jegs2** » 2003-02-28 04:30pm

I don't use them (profanity-based insults), although I can and do insult others without the use of profanity, which I consider beneath me. Even so, I try not to insult others...

Tom_Aurum · Post by **Tom_Aurum** » 2003-02-28 05:39pm

Well, sometimes when telling a person the absolute, direct, honest truth they will claim on some poorly built moral high ground that you are being _mean_ and _unfair_. I try myself to tell as plain a truth as possible, and many, many people are shocked by it.

Ravencrow · Post by **Ravencrow** » 2003-02-28 06:29pm

Many people can't take the truth in the face, and thus, pointing out something flat out is 'insulting' to them even if you don't mean to be insulting.
Some people prefer polite lies over truths apparently.

Master of Ossus · Post by **Master of Ossus** » 2003-02-28 06:48pm

I insult other people just to laugh at them, sometimes, and to make my discussions with others on BBS more amusing to others. I agree with most of your qualifiers on the insults, although I would amend the first one to state that the best insults are never FOCUSED around a swear word. For example, Lord Wong's claiming that Spaceluigi was a worthless, trolling palm-fucker was very amusing not because of the word "fucker," but because of the novel way in which it was used.

Master of Ossus · Post by **Master of Ossus** » 2003-02-28 06:49pm

Ravencrow wrote:Many people can't take the truth in the face, and thus, pointing out something flat out is 'insulting' to them even if you don't mean to be insulting.

Exactly.

Cap'n Hector · Post by **Cap'n Hector** » 2003-02-28 08:00pm

Most of the time I've been insulted it's been someone who needs to feel better about themselves.

They don't when I'm through with them....

Tom_Aurum · Post by **Tom_Aurum** » 2003-02-28 08:18pm

I don't. That's the point. The best sort of insult is the kind that gets someone to think. To sit there and question their own existence, offend someone into remaking themselves, giving their entire mind a reset, ultimately strengthening that person.

Exonerate · Post by **Exonerate** » 2003-02-28 11:08pm

I insult people all the time. However, a lot of that is subtle or poking fun at something they do or how they act.

I'm in HS, so I'm probably fairly good with insults...

HemlockGrey · Post by **HemlockGrey** » 2003-02-28 11:12pm

My friends and I volley insults back and forth all the time. Variations on "You're gay." and "Kill yourself" mostly, with the winner being whoever can be the funniest and most creative. Of course, our former English teacher threatened to kill anyone she caught making gay jokes, so we had to be careful around her.

Although, today, all throughout school, I had to listen to these two or three people bitch at each other all FUCKING DAY because they were so FUCKING HORRIBLY OFFENDED that one of their friends had called them 'poor'.

I swear, it was this whole big, ritualized spaz, probably planned out weeks in advance. I might have missed the animal sacrifice when I came late to third period, but I'm sure it happened.

HemlockGrey · Post by **HemlockGrey** » 2003-02-28 11:13pm

My friends and I volley insults back and forth all the time. Variations on "You're gay." and "Kill yourself" mostly, with the winner being whoever can be the funniest and most creative. Of course, our former English teacher threatened to kill anyone she caught making gay jokes, so we had to be careful around her.

Although, today, all throughout school, I had to listen to these two or three people bitch at each other all FUCKING DAY because they were so FUCKING HORRIBLY OFFENDED that one of their friends had called them 'poor'.

I swear, it was this whole big, ritualized spaz, probably planned out weeks in advance. I might have missed the animal sacrifice when I came late to third period, but I'm sure it happened.

DPDarkPrimus · Post by **DPDarkPrimus** » 2003-03-01 01:29am

I make jokes about the people around me (not all of them are my friends) all the time. I just pay attention to what they're saying, and I'll say a good comeback on the spot.

Post by **Darth Wong** » 2003-03-01 01:35am

Examples of insults:

"You're a fucking idiot": standard-issue anger expression. It really shouldn't bother anyone that much, to be honest. It is not really personal in the sense that it's a completely generic insult.

"Ah, so in the typical <insert your name here> style, you naturally <insert something bad here>": a very personal insult, designed to attack both your argument and your personality in the same breath, thus forcing you to either defend one or both or claim misrepresentation.

"You are probably behaving that way because of <insert long-winded psychobabble here>": probably the most infuriating and personal type of insult, because it completely eschews logical rebuttal of your point in favour of appealing to motive and attacking your psychological makeup.

Captain tycho · Post by **Captain tycho** » 2003-03-01 01:39am

I just tease people occasionally and poke fun, although the assholes who deserve insults do get theirs....

Post by **Sea Skimmer** » 2003-03-01 01:40am

I insult people constantly. Though I've noticed a decline in the "quality" of insults thrown around at my school. In many cases, especially among lower grades, the response to "fuck you" is now "well double fuck you"

Pitiful. Too many brain cells working on math, not enough on social skills...

neoolong · Post by **neoolong** » 2003-03-01 01:48am

Sea Skimmer wrote:I insult people constantly. Though I've noticed a decline in the "quality" of insults thrown around at my school. In many cases, especially among lower grades, the response to "fuck you" is now "well double fuck you"

Pitiful. Too many brain cells working on math, not enough on social skills...

So is that "double fuck you" like the "double dumbass" from STIV?

Post by **Sea Skimmer** » 2003-03-01 02:12am

neoolong wrote:
Sea Skimmer wrote:I insult people constantly. Though I've noticed a decline in the "quality" of insults thrown around at my school. In many cases, especially among lower grades, the response to "fuck you" is now "well double fuck you"

Pitiful. Too many brain cells working on math, not enough on social skills...
So is that "double fuck you" like the "double dumbass" from STIV?

STIV?

Crayz9000 · Post by **Crayz9000** » 2003-03-01 02:26am

Sea Skimmer wrote:STIV?

Star Trek 4, where Kirk & co are wandering around in 1986 San Francisco like beached whales.

Kirk, apparently not quite realizing how intersections worked, decided to jaywalk and got called a dumbass by a local driver. "And a double dumbass to you!" was his response.

Enlightenment · Post by **Enlightenment** » 2003-03-01 02:34am

Bah. This is an insult.

"You're clueless, son! Completely clueless!
You wouldn't have a clue if somebody *faxed* it to you.
You couldn't catch a clue if you stripped naked and soaked your pallid
hide in clue musk, then did the clue mating dance in a field full of
horny clues during the height of clue mating season!

What meaning do you expect your delusional self-important statements
of unknowing, inexperienced opinion to have with us? What fantasy do
you hold that you would believe that your tiny-fisted tantrums would
have more weight than that of a leprous desert rat, spinning rabidly
in a circle, waiting for the bite of the snake?

I cannot believe how incredibly stupid you are. I mean rock-hard
stupid. Dehydrated-rock-hard stupid. Stupid so stupid that it goes
way beyond the stupid we know into a whole different dimension of
stupid. You are trans-stupid stupid. Meta-stupid. Stupid collapsed
on itself so far that even the neutrons have collapsed. Stupid gotten
so dense that no intellect can escape. Singularity stupid. Blazing
hot mid-day sun on Mercury stupid. You emit more stupid in one second
than our entire galaxy emits in a year. Quasar stupid. Your writing
has to be a troll. Nothing in our universe can really be this stupid.
Perhaps this is some primordial fragment from the original big bang of
stupid. Some pure essence of a stupid so uncontaminated by anything
else as to be beyond the laws of physics that we know. I'm sorry. I
can't go on. This is an epiphany of stupid for me."

Majin Gojira · Post by **Majin Gojira** » 2003-03-01 12:17pm

Enlightenment wrote:Bah. This is an insult.

"You're clueless, son! Completely clueless!
You wouldn't have a clue if somebody *faxed* it to you.
You couldn't catch a clue if you stripped naked and soaked your pallid
hide in clue musk, then did the clue mating dance in a field full of
horny clues during the height of clue mating season!

What meaning do you expect your delusional self-important statements
of unknowing, inexperienced opinion to have with us? What fantasy do
you hold that you would believe that your tiny-fisted tantrums would
have more weight than that of a leprous desert rat, spinning rabidly
in a circle, waiting for the bite of the snake?

I cannot believe how incredibly stupid you are. I mean rock-hard
stupid. Dehydrated-rock-hard stupid. Stupid so stupid that it goes
way beyond the stupid we know into a whole different dimension of
stupid. You are trans-stupid stupid. Meta-stupid. Stupid collapsed
on itself so far that even the neutrons have collapsed. Stupid gotten
so dense that no intellect can escape. Singularity stupid. Blazing
hot mid-day sun on Mercury stupid. You emit more stupid in one second
than our entire galaxy emits in a year. Quasar stupid. Your writing
has to be a troll. Nothing in our universe can really be this stupid.
Perhaps this is some primordial fragment from the original big bang of
stupid. Some pure essence of a stupid so uncontaminated by anything
else as to be beyond the laws of physics that we know. I'm sorry. I
can't go on. This is an epiphany of stupid for me."

Now THAT is an insult

Captain Jack · Post by **Captain Jack** » 2003-03-01 06:50pm

Lol

You should use that on someone

Uraniun235 · Post by **Uraniun235** » 2003-03-02 02:18am

My friends and I like to insult each other at lunch time for shits and giggles. Sometimes we go for the technogeek approach:

"You're so Windows 95."
"Big words coming from NT 3.51!"
"Shut up, MS Works for Windows!"
"Fuck you, Visual Basic 2!"

And sometimes it's sexual vulgarity:

"Bill, you are such a cumguzzling gutterwhore."
"Yeah, you would say that, you trisexual coprophiliac."

But I almost never use insults against someone... the truth is often far more devastating.

Shinova · Post by **Shinova** » 2003-03-02 02:22am

Enlightenment wrote:Bah. This is an insult.

"You're clueless, son! Completely clueless!
You wouldn't have a clue if somebody *faxed* it to you.
You couldn't catch a clue if you stripped naked and soaked your pallid
hide in clue musk, then did the clue mating dance in a field full of
horny clues during the height of clue mating season!

What meaning do you expect your delusional self-important statements
of unknowing, inexperienced opinion to have with us? What fantasy do
you hold that you would believe that your tiny-fisted tantrums would
have more weight than that of a leprous desert rat, spinning rabidly
in a circle, waiting for the bite of the snake?

I cannot believe how incredibly stupid you are. I mean rock-hard
stupid. Dehydrated-rock-hard stupid. Stupid so stupid that it goes
way beyond the stupid we know into a whole different dimension of
stupid. You are trans-stupid stupid. Meta-stupid. Stupid collapsed
on itself so far that even the neutrons have collapsed. Stupid gotten
so dense that no intellect can escape. Singularity stupid. Blazing
hot mid-day sun on Mercury stupid. You emit more stupid in one second
than our entire galaxy emits in a year. Quasar stupid. Your writing
has to be a troll. Nothing in our universe can really be this stupid.
Perhaps this is some primordial fragment from the original big bang of
stupid. Some pure essence of a stupid so uncontaminated by anything
else as to be beyond the laws of physics that we know. I'm sorry. I
can't go on. This is an epiphany of stupid for me."

I think it's too elaborate. Something short but to the point would be more effective.

Asst. Asst. Lt. Cmdr. Smi · Post by **Asst. Asst. Lt. Cmdr. Smi** » 2003-03-02 01:59pm

Sometimes I insult people, but I try to make them witty and creative. There are the people I insult people who insult me back. Most of the time, those insults are varations of "You're gay", or "You're an idiot". In response, I either do nothing or say something creative, like "Try flushing your shit down the toilet instead of throwing it everywhere". However, since I'm not too good at speaking, I just make a fool of myself. When the insult is something like "You suck your dick!", or "You're retarded!", I say something like "Well, at least I have a dick", "Actually, I don't, but I'm sure you would if you had one, or "I wouldn't be talking, snice you were the one barred from the Special Olympics because they felt you weren't smart enough.