The worst imaginable disaster?

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Darth Hoth
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Re: The worst imaginable disaster?

Post by Darth Hoth »

Lord of the Abyss wrote:An insane AI thinks it's Jehovah and uploads all of humanity into a full sensory Hell simulation subjectively run at millions of times real time. This situation lasts until the universe dies, so we get to experience torture for millions of times longer than the universe actually lasts. Oh, and add error correction routines to the uploaded human minds so they can't ever go insane or somehow get used to it, and rewrite the minds so they can experience much greater levels of suffering than is humanly possible.
This one is very hard to trump. However:

Eventually, it turns out that it was not actually an AI, but is really Jehovah, an actual omnipotent God. Thus, the suffering in Hell goes on, not for a few million googols of apparent years (or whatever), but for the literal "eternities of the eternities" and "worlds without end" of which the Holy Bible speaks. In other words, not merely unbelievably long ages, but truly infinite time, next to which googolplexes* of galactic years** are shorter than a Planck time*** in comparison. Which ought to make it that much worse, and unlike the AI, it affects everyone who was ever born, not just the people who were unlucky enough to happen to be alive at the time.

(Well, if you are a Christian, you get to go to Heaven instead, so for that group it is better. But for the majority of people, it is much, much worse in the end, though it might be hard to tell for the first few aeons.)


* That is, googol^googol, or 10^(10^100)
** Circa 240 million years
*** Circa 5.391e-44 seconds
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Re: The worst imaginable disaster?

Post by Sky Captain »

From disasters that are actually plausible being ejected from solar system is my favorite. Like a giant :finger: from the Universe. What could be worse than watching the sun become dimmer and dimmer, weather becoming colder while knowing perfectly that next crops WILL fail because of cold and you will inevitably die from starvation.
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Re: The worst imaginable disaster?

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Sky Captain wrote:From disasters that are actually plausible being ejected from solar system is my favorite. Like a giant :finger: from the Universe. What could be worse than watching the sun become dimmer and dimmer, weather becoming colder while knowing perfectly that next crops WILL fail because of cold and you will inevitably die from starvation.
There should be plenty of similar disasters that have the same effect.

Like a miniature black hole comes into contact with our sun and collapses it. Our sun then becomes a black hole and stops emitting light. Our Earth might still be in orbit around it (since it has the same mass) but we get to freeze to death. Though I guess having the sun become a black hole would cause us to freeze to death relatively quickly while being ejected from the solar system would probably give us time to suffer.

Or, a genetically modified microbe might arise that's capable of wiping out all life. I recall a Cracked.com article (not the most reliable source around I know) about a modified form of soil microbe that created alchohol. It was supposed to help turn compost into biofuel but they found out that it can survive in normal soil, produce alchohol until all the plants around it died of alchohol poisoning, consume the dead matter, and then keep spreading. If such a microbe got loose (like if it got mixed in with common fertilizers all over the world) and wiped out all our crops then that would seriously fuck up our civilization. If the microbe makes it impossible to grow crops anywhere then agriculture fails and we've got billions of people going hungry. Cue mass starvations and panic.

The sad part is that if our land-based agriculture is rendered impossible and people are starving we would have to fish the oceans for more food. Overfishing could destroy out oceanic ecosystems and fuck up everything. The first half of global environmental collapse would be an 'accident' but the second half would be the logical outcome of us trying to deal with the first half. Though to be fair, humanity might survive this but the mass starvations and such would likely wipe out enough people that we can't get to the stars for centuries more.

Or, somebody invents Ice 9 and drops it into the ocean.
Fry: No! They did it! They blew it up! And then the apes blew up their society too. How could this happen? And then the birds took over and ruined their society. And then the cows. And then... I don't know, is that a slug, maybe? Noooo!

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Re: The worst imaginable disaster?

Post by CaptainChewbacca »

Ice Nine's Wiki Page, for those who don't read Kurt Vonnegut.
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Re: The worst imaginable disaster?

Post by Lord Baal »

Darth Hoth wrote: This one is very hard to trump. However:

Eventually, it turns out that it was not actually an AI, but is really Jehovah, an actual omnipotent God.
Not wanting to open a theological and philosophical debate, but if we are in the simulation, where's the difference?

EDIT:
Darth Hoth wrote:and unlike the AI, it affects everyone who was ever born, not just the people who were unlucky enough to happen to be alive at the time.
Oh there it is... sorry :)
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Re: The worst imaginable disaster?

Post by Darth Hoth »

Well, that and more so, if the Hell is only simulated, it will go away eventually, since the program still has physical limits.

An omnipotent God, on the other hand, has none, and can keep it up literally "for ever and ever." Which means far past the projected date for the heat death of the universe.
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Re: The worst imaginable disaster?

Post by Lord Baal »

So worst case scenario, Christians are right. Simple, classic, true.
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Re: The worst imaginable disaster?

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Lord Baal wrote:So worst case scenario, Christians are right. Simple, classic, true.
Well to be fair, I don't think the eternal hell was actually in the bible in the first place (unless you count one of those fables or parables that Jesus told) so hypothetically if an omnipotent god being showed up then it wouldn't be the same one as in the bible.

So the real worst case scenario would be if christians were wrong but an actual omnipotent god showed up and decided to take the catholic church seriously enough to build an actual eternal hell just because the church decided to add Dante's Inferno to their sermons.

Omnipotent Being: Do de dum, man it sure has been boring wndering the infinite planes of the universe. If only I could find some intelligent life and reconfigure reality to better suit their expectations. Yeah, I'm sure basing the laws of reality on the thoughts of an intelligent mind would be so much better than how it actually turned out (not that I'd be able to tell either way since i'm an immortal being that has no physical or emotional needs that can influence my desires... dammit).

Insane Pastor: And the true Omnipotent Lord will come and cast ALL sinners into the fiery pits of HELL for all eternity! Forever and ever until the end of time and beyond will they scream in agony and be tortured forever by fat hairy demons with corkscrews!! Oh, you think this fate cannot happen you you? Well, let it be known that The Lord sees every sin, and if you've ever even looked or thought about a man, woman, animal, child or anime-style drawing thereof in any sort of sexual manner then you have SINNED exactly as if you had molested them in reality yourself! ... I am not a pedophile!

Omnipotent Being: Well, considering that I've never even seen an intelligent being aside from myself before (assuming I'm intelligent... you know, intelligence doesn't normally naturally form in beings that are already too invincible to have to care about doing stuff carefully... I think) I have no moral or ethical framework with which to judge the sanity or justness of this mans philosophical cosmology (assuming that even makes sense). But, he's the first guy I've seen who has a non-real vision of the universe that he thinks is right that I've seen so I guess I'll reconfigure the universe to suit that and see what happens.

<10 seconds later>

Everyone who ever lived or will live: HOLY CRAP WE'RE ALL ON FIRE BUT NOT DYING!! WHY???!!!

Omnipotent Being: Hmm... well, its alot louder than the previous configuration of reality at any rate. I choose to interpret this change of ambient stimuli in my environment as an improvement.


(and just to make this worse, if said omnipotent being had chosen the kindly old lady sitting two rows away from the crazy guy then everyone would be in heaven with eternal youth and happiness. Of course, this reality would also re-write everyones brains so they be nice to eachother but its still better than eternal damnation).
Fry: No! They did it! They blew it up! And then the apes blew up their society too. How could this happen? And then the birds took over and ruined their society. And then the cows. And then... I don't know, is that a slug, maybe? Noooo!

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Re: The worst imaginable disaster?

Post by Ryag Han »

matrix becomes real, and were all harvested for energy production...but no fucking matrix, were all still conscious...

or, Ragnarök. that's a pretty grim one. everyone dies of starvation, the world is burned to a crisp by Surtur. fuck, im off this planet. see you guys on Alpha Centauri 7.
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Re: The worst imaginable disaster?

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For more information on unimaginable horrible disaster that could befall us, please go to Ex Mundi dot com
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Re: The worst imaginable disaster?

Post by NoXion »

I see something like this hasn't been mentioned yet; a physics experiment leads to the birth of a new universe within our own, like in Schild's Ladder, except the natives of the new universe are hostile.

Or perhaps we create an AI with the terminal goal of "keeping us happy" and it ends up painting smilies on our souls. Although I will admit that kind of subversion of my apparent free will doesn't seem as scary as the prospect of being killed or tortured for multiple eternities. Superstimulus!

A more classical scenario that I didn't spot; an galactic-scale interstellar alien empire conquers the Solar system and humans become their slaves and janissaries.
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Re: The worst imaginable disaster?

Post by Eleas »

Ryag Han wrote:or, Ragnarök. that's a pretty grim one. everyone dies of starvation, the world is burned to a crisp by Surtur. fuck, im off this planet. see you guys on Alpha Centauri 7.
Ragnarök ends in the world being reborn, you know.
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Re: The worst imaginable disaster?

Post by Ryag Han »

Eleas wrote:
Ragnarök ends in the world being reborn, you know.
yeah, after almost everybody dies. almost as in two humans left and a handful of gods. but everyone else dies.

EDIT: here's another. carnivorous aliens invade Earth and start eating everybody.
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Re: The worst imaginable disaster?

Post by Nieztchean Uber-Amoeba »

What if the rapehounds also said hurtful things to lower your self-esteem while they were raping you.

Like, "you're ugly."

Or, "you could have been really good at soccer but you never developed your talent and now that time has passed you by."
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Re: The worst imaginable disaster?

Post by Batman »

And make you watch 'Galactica 1980' while doing it.
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Re: The worst imaginable disaster?

Post by ChosenOne54 »

The moon crashes into the Earth?
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Re: The worst imaginable disaster?

Post by Lord Baal »

The moon goes away from earth, faster than now?
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Re: The worst imaginable disaster?

Post by Lord_Of_Change 9 »

Total Event Collapse, from Doctor Who.

The entire multiverse retroactively destroyed from the moment of the Big Bang. Yeah, that's bad.
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Re: The worst imaginable disaster?

Post by Nieztchean Uber-Amoeba »

And the rapehounds draw swastikas everywhere. Not even as a racist thing, they just like the design of it so they doodle them all the time and it makes you feel uncomfortable.
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Re: The worst imaginable disaster?

Post by madd0ct0r »

Nietztchean Uber-Amobea - I assume you know that swastikas are an ancient bhuddist symbol? People do doodle them everywhere over here, they're built nto temple gates, vases, scooters, earrings, you name it.

A rabies variant of speedy zombies would be pretty horrible.
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Re: The worst imaginable disaster?

Post by PeZook »

We are conquered by an alien civilization of unimaginable scale and power. They like our zany ways, and lock us in cages and have us amuse them as pets in zoos.

Humanity is kept as illiterate savages, only living for the amusement of the aliens, who rule an empire composed of a million galaxies. They are superior to every other species in the universe, and thus will never be defeated. We are thus reduced too an endless existence as barely sentient pets, without history, culture or any sort of science.

The aliens also use as instead of lab animals, because we breed quickly.

It's not as bad as "eternal damnation", but I doubt anybody can come up with something better than THAT.
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Re: The worst imaginable disaster?

Post by Nieztchean Uber-Amoeba »

PeZook wrote: It's not as bad as "eternal damnation", but I doubt anybody can come up with something better than THAT.
The rapehounds also use way too much of that really cheap, alcohol-smelling cologne, and when you're in a plane with them, it's fucking unbearable.
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Re: The worst imaginable disaster?

Post by khursed »

After finding a miraculous cure for every disease and form of cancer, we finally achieve true immortality, to sudenly find ourselves incapable of dying as the universe goes into a great rip, and everything is after a little over 10E100 years just humans separated by trillions of lightyears from one another floating in a dark universe that will never end, and where we can never die...
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Re: The worst imaginable disaster?

Post by Darth Tedious »

Batman wrote:VOY gets belatedly renewed for another 7 seasons.
Batman wrote:And make you watch 'Galactica 1980' while doing it.
Batman is made a network executive.

His mind corrupted by power, he decides to fuck with us.
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Re: The worst imaginable disaster?

Post by MKSheppard »

Destructionator XIII wrote:Imagine this: a passing astronomical object swings by the solar system, passing kinda close to Earth and giving it a speed boost.

One of two things happens.... we're in an elliptical orbit now, so talk about extreme fucking seasons and climate change...

Or we're ejected from the solar system entirely.
Been done, albeit to a random Colony world in Frederik Pohl's The World at the End of Time.
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