Morbid question: How would you fake your death?

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Morbid question: How would you fake your death?

Post by Asst. Asst. Lt. Cmdr. Smi »

Let's say that for some reason, you need to fake your death. How would you fool everyone and make them think you killed yourself when you're acutally alive?

Try not to re-hash someone else's idea, unless by coincedence that would be your plan too.
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Post by Exonerate »

Something that involves an explosion so there shouldn't be any remains of me. That way, they'll think I'm really dead.

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Post by Montcalm »

Well personnaly i would find some dead body who`s about my size then i would carry it to an abandonned building put every ID cards i have put them in the pockets,burn the face and hands so the only id they`ll find on the corpse would tell the police that i`m dead.
and i simply go away to live in another country.
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Post by Superman »

I work in a funeral home. This would be easy. hehe
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Post by Wicked Pilot »

Take a small boat out to sea into the direction of known thundersorms. Arrange for someone to pick you up just ahead of the squall lines, and then sink the vessel.
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Post by Mr Bean »

"Chased Butterfly onto the Flight Deck, Net got caut on wing of F-14, Was accelerated to roughly 200 MPH before the net broke and he hit the water"

Both a specatoluer death and a memorable one

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Post by Mr Bean »

Or more morbid and terrifing


"Subjects house was found destroyed save for the living room on which the words "IAN Cultuluth!" were scrawed over the walls in human blood matching the bloodtype of the victum in several diffrent spellings and nineteen laugages, The remains of the victium where found at the edge of a mirror the subject had purchased the week before, The mirror itself was unharmed though the area where it had been has suffered over 2000 Degrees of Direct heat"


That would scareafy people for the next few years :twisted:

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Post by Darth Yoshi »

Mr Bean wrote:"Chased Butterfly onto the Flight Deck, Net got caut on wing of F-14, Was accelerated to roughly 200 MPH before the net broke and he hit the water"

Both a specatoluer death and a memorable one
Huh? How're you going to pull that off?

As for me, it'll involve some poor schmo with my height and build. Horridly burn his face, feet and hands, and give him my ID.
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Post by Sea Skimmer »

Exonerate wrote:Something that involves an explosion so there shouldn't be any remains of me. That way, they'll think I'm really dead.
That wont work very well, you'd need a huge blast to do more then scatter your body parts and the authorities know it. Filling your house with natural gas for example, won't do it.

I'd go for drowning in a major river or the ocean. Though you need the right stretch of shore to be able to come back up out of sight. It wont be surprising if he body doesn't turn up, because the waters going to be dark and the currents would move the corpse miles easily.

The hard part is having a convincing show for a witness, who couldn't be in on it. You cant risk them talking, which they likely will.
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Post by Exonerate »

Sea Skimmer wrote:
Exonerate wrote:Something that involves an explosion so there shouldn't be any remains of me. That way, they'll think I'm really dead.
That wont work very well, you'd need a huge blast to do more then scatter your body parts and the authorities know it. Filling your house with natural gas for example, won't do it.

I'd go for drowning in a major river or the ocean. Though you need the right stretch of shore to be able to come back up out of sight. It wont be surprising if he body doesn't turn up, because the waters going to be dark and the currents would move the corpse miles easily.

The hard part is having a convincing show for a witness, who couldn't be in on it. You cant risk them talking, which they likely will.
Ah well... I wanted to go out with a bang... :P
There's no need for witnesses... I'll just rig my house or car or something up with huge explosives, then detonate it.

I don't suppose it's possible to steal a suitcase nuke from Russia... :wink:

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Post by Montcalm »

Exonerate wrote:
Sea Skimmer wrote:
Exonerate wrote:Something that involves an explosion so there shouldn't be any remains of me. That way, they'll think I'm really dead.
That wont work very well, you'd need a huge blast to do more then scatter your body parts and the authorities know it. Filling your house with natural gas for example, won't do it.

I'd go for drowning in a major river or the ocean. Though you need the right stretch of shore to be able to come back up out of sight. It wont be surprising if he body doesn't turn up, because the waters going to be dark and the currents would move the corpse miles easily.

The hard part is having a convincing show for a witness, who couldn't be in on it. You cant risk them talking, which they likely will.
Ah well... I wanted to go out with a bang... :P
There's no need for witnesses... I'll just rig my house or car or something up with huge explosives, then detonate it.

I don't suppose it's possible to steal a suitcase nuke from Russia... :wink:
Good idea to fake your death you would nuke a whole city block :shock:
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Post by Superman »

If Elvis can do it, so can I. :D
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Post by irishmick79 »

Mr Bean wrote:"Chased Butterfly onto the Flight Deck, Net got caut on wing of F-14, Was accelerated to roughly 200 MPH before the net broke and he hit the water"

Both a specatoluer death and a memorable one

Ummm, the key word in this topic would have been FAKE. That death doesn't exactly sound fakable to me. Spectacular, yes, but not exactly fakable.

Oh, and I would have organized a "suicide" by machine gun, making sure I stopped firing twice to reload.
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Re: Morbid question: How would you fake your death?

Post by GrandMasterTerwynn »

Asst. Asst. Lt. Cmdr. Smi wrote:Let's say that for some reason, you need to fake your death. How would you fool everyone and make them think you killed yourself when you're acutally alive?

Try not to re-hash someone else's idea, unless by coincedence that would be your plan too.
Hmmm, well, I'd go up into the mountains and cache some supplies, say a shaving kit, several changes of clothes, a lot of money . . . etc.

And then, I'd announce I'm taking a day hike, walk off into the woods, and then scatter my current set of clothes all around the forest, pitch my phone and my wallet (minus my bank card possibly), so it'd look like wild animals got to me. Then, I put on a fresh change of clothes, shave my face, do a quick dye-job on my hair, and hike out of the forest some distance away.

And then . . . awww, how sad. I 'died' out in the forest somewhere, maybe fell off a cliff, and wild animals dispersed my remains before search and rescue could get to me.
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Post by Darth Yoshi »

But shouldn't that leave bones?
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Post by GrandMasterTerwynn »

Darth Yoshi wrote:But shouldn't that leave bones?
Pshhh, nothing a trip to a graveyard with a pickaxe and a shovel won't fix. And they'd have to search the area foot-by-foot to find remains. And the investigation could concievably take years.
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Post by Asst. Asst. Lt. Cmdr. Smi »

I'd find a dead body which died from drowning that's about my size, and apply a latex face and fingerprints so it will look like me. Then, I will insert the body into water, where it will be washed up after a while, recovered, and identified. Also, I will attatch a camera to it, so I can see and hear what people thought of me from a location far from them.

Why would I do this? So I could find out what they thought of me, and after several months, reveal that I had never died.
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Post by SirNitram »

Rent a plane. Take off, fly around, jump out with a smuggler's rig(A parachute with no metal parts, so radar can't see it), and let it crash into the sea. Let them wonder.
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Post by XaLEv »

Obtain a body similar to mine and make it look like it has been tortured and murdered. Pull out it's teeth and dispose of them, pulverize it's skeleton, then burn it beyond recognition. Leave identification nearby indicating the corpse is me.
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Post by weemadando »

Lets see, I have a reliable source of genuine death certificates and know some easily bribed doctors.

"Disappear" at sea is the easiest way. Anything else gets very very difficult.
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