Remember Jack Harkness arse gun?

[mr friendly guy]

For anyone who can't remember, there was a scene in season one of NuWho where the Doctor's companion Jack Harkness played by John Barrowman is stuck in a high tech reality television show which becomes deadly. Robots give him the makeover and then decide they want to do more than clothes. They want to cut his head off and replace with another head. Unfortunately for Jack, they had used a defabricator on him, a machine which strips the clothing off you with a blast but leaves the body intact. So he was essentially naked and up against two hostile robots. Not to worry, this is captain Jack after all.

Jack pulls out a gun and the robots puzzle how he could have hidden a gun when he was naked. Jack's reply was you don't want to know. The "arse" gun scene was one of the better ones in NuWho. For those who don't remember, lets show that scene again.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bilZMfsIgLY

Now why am I bringing this up?

Well allegedly some guy high on meth did a similar things.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/06/1 ... 08479.html

Drug Suspect Pulls Gun From Butt, Shoots Squad Car: Cops
The Huffington Post | By David Moye
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Posted: 06/18/2014 5:16 pm EDT Updated: 06/18/2014 5:59 pm EDT

An alleged meth user who'd been repeatedly searched by Denver police fired two shots at cops while handcuffed with a gun that was reportedly nestled between his butt cheeks.

The embarrassing and dangerous moment for Denver's police was highlighted Monday when the district attorney announced no charges would be filed against a corporal for shooting the armed suspect.

On May 14, Isaac Vigil, 32, was picked up at a McDonald’s on suspicion of using methamphetamine. He was also wanted on a nationwide felony warrant for weapons violations.

Upon arriving at a police station for booking, he refused to get out of a patrol car and allegedly got off two shots before his gun jammed.

He was wounded in the abdomen when Corporal John Sisneros returned fire.

Officers had previously searched Vigil's body at least three times, according to Westword.

During those searches, officers claimed that they recovered a knife from the waistband of Vigil's pants, a bank card in his name and a crack pipe.

However, they missed a semi-automatic .25 caliber pistol and three bags of meth hidden in his anus, according to the report from District Attorney Mitch Morrissey to Police Chief Robert White.

While being driven to the station, Vigil screamed “I’ve got something for you," and “You better have a vest on” from the backseat. He even allegedly said “I’m gonna shoot you," according to KDVR TV.

Vigil has been charged with two counts of attempted first-degree murder, two counts of first-degree assault, possession of a controlled substance, possession of a weapon by a previous offender, and possession of a defaced firearm, CBS Denver reports.

Morrissey said in the letter to White that no charges will be filed against Sisneros because the shooting was justified, the Denver Channel reports.

This is either a funny hoax (will wait and see), some excuse to justify police shooting the suspect while handcuffed, or if its real it will be Doctor Who showing a futuristic way of concealing firearms.

[Broomstick]

It's amazing what you can pack into a human rectum. There is precedent for weaponry up the ass, so it's probable. Would still like to see confirmation.

[Iroscato]

I have a frankly unhealthy desire to look into the mechanics of this. Like, was the gun held in place solely with the gripping power of his buttocks? Did he have to wedge the barrel up his starfish to keep it in place? Is there something wrong with me?

[General Zod]

It's honestly kind of amazing that he didn't wind up shooting himself.

[Eternal_Freedom]

Amusing as this is, what exactly does "possessing a defaced firearm" mean?

[Dominus Atheos]

Amusing as this is, what exactly does "possessing a defaced firearm" mean?

Removing the serial number from a gun.

[Eternal_Freedom]

Oh. I thought it might have been a typo and was meant to be "defecated firearm."

[Broomstick]

It's a bit amazing what the human rectum will accomodate. Actual x-ray, though not of the person and gun in the OP. This was someone else's x-ray so, really, the ass-gun is not unprecedented.

[Isolder74]

That' nothing you should see this article.

For suspect, gun is a pain in the ...

For suspect, gun is a pain in the ...
Friday Jan 13, 2012 1:50 PM
EMAIL

Editors note: Some readers might find the contents of this post offensive.


WITN-TV

Authorities believe Michael Ward concealed this 10-inch-long .38-caliber handgun from them by hiding it where the sun don't shine.

By msnbc.com staff and NBC News
A man who was pulled over for a traffic violation in North Carolina was found this week with a gun in his jail cell — a big gun that authorities believe he hid in his rectum.

The man, identified as Michael Leon Ward, 22, of Canton, Ga., was in the Onslow County, N.C., jail after his arrest Monday morning. He is awaiting extradition to Georgia, where he is wanted on a fugitive warrant in a murder investigation.

But that's not why you're reading this. You want to know about the gun.(my favorite line)

Deputies told NBC station WITN of Washington, N.C., that Ward was searched and then strip-searched before he was put into a holding cell. Jailers also made Ward perform what they call a "squat and cough" procedure.
Only later did they find the gun — a .38-caliber revolver, with a 4½-inch barrel. While it wasn't loaded, it worked just fine when officers loaded a bullet and test-fired it.


WITN-TV

Authorities said Michael Ward is wanted on suspicion of murder in Georgia.

According to a Highway Patrol incident report, state troopers stopped Ward on Monday morning after he passed them going more than 90 mph, authorities said. Ward and a woman claiming to be his wife rolled up their windows and locked their doors when troopers approached.

After troopers forced the door open, Ward resisted and had to be subdued with a Taser, they said. Authorities say Ward told them he was unable to get out of the car because he was disabled and couldn't walk.

Ward was first taken to a hospital because he was complaining of heart problems. Officers didn't find the gun. Nor did they find it when he was put in his jail cell.

Eventually, jailers discovered the gun in his cell.

Both Ward and the woman claiming to be his wife gave false names, authorities said. Once he was identified, they learned that he is wanted on suspicion of first-degree murder and armed robbery in Canton, Ga., north of Atlanta.

NBC station WNCN of Raleigh reported that Ward was being taken back to the hospital Friday for examination of "possible injuries that may have occurred" to his rectum.

In the meantime, he's charged in North Carolina with a half-dozen counts, including speeding, DWI, reckless driving and resisting arrest, the Highway Patrol said.

[DaveJB]

It's a bit amazing what the human rectum will accomodate. Actual x-ray, though not of the person and gun in the OP. This was someone else's x-ray so, really, the ass-gun is not unprecedented.

<snip>

If that's what a normal person can stick up their butt, then all I can say is remind me never to piss off Kirk Johnson (the Goatse guy).

In any case, I'm not sure which thought is stranger - that either this guy makes a habit of walking around with a gun jammed up his backside, or he was somehow able to rapidly stuff it up there without the cops noticing.

[Broomstick]

Let's just say that almost anything becomes easier with practice.

[Zaune]

Let's just say that almost anything becomes easier with practice.

I may never look at you in quite the same way again now...

[Darth Nostril]

After being the photographer at a BDSM & fetish club for a couple of years and witnessing someone insert their arm past the elbow into another persons back passage I am no longer amazed at what people can pack into their rectums.
Disgusted yes but not amazed.

[Broomstick]

Oh, my, I'm sure YOU have some amazing stories...!

[Iroscato]

Oh, my, I'm sure YOU have some amazing stories...!

We, the members of SDN do collectively demand a thread dedicated to the exploits of Darth Nostril

[bilateralrope]

Let's just say that almost anything becomes easier with practice.

At the same time, emergency rooms have had to remove smaller objects from someones rectum.

Deadspin has a yearly article titled What Did We Get Stuck In Our Rectums Last Year? where they have a list of the bizarre things people have got stuck in various orifices. Most are bizarre, some sound quite painful. Especially the stuff inserted into the penis.

Hiding a gun up your ass sounds a like more reasonable than the things there. At least the gun is understandable.

[Darth Nostril]

At the same time, emergency rooms have had to remove smaller objects from someones rectum.

Getting things in isn't the problem, with enough lube and determination.
Getting it back out ... that's another matter.
All that lube quite often makes it too slippery to get a good grip, combined with how tightly the sphincter can contract ...
That's when you need the assistance of someone with knowledge of human anatomy and a pair of pliers.

[Darth Nostril]

Oh, my, I'm sure YOU have some amazing stories...!

We, the members of SDN do collectively demand a thread dedicated to the exploits of Darth Nostril

I'll have to think about that, protecting the identities of the (not so) innocent and all that.

[Korto]

You'll be amazed at some of the things people trip and accidentally fall onto.
"If you're going to accidentally fall onto your cell phone and it somehow makes it's way into your rectum, please have the foresight to tell your friends beforehand to not keep calling you every five minutes."

Apparently has enough self-respect to not try and claim it was some kind of ridiculous 'accident':
1. No matter how well it worked on Jackass, lubing up a toy truck and shoving it as far up your anus with a wooden spoon handle as can is not a good idea. Doctors were not impressed when they discovered the reason for the severe rectal bleeding and obvious swelling of the abdo and ragin feever from a ruptured large intestine.

Hey, look! There's another SDN that mocks stupid people! And there's a treasure trove of idiots here. Did you know?

the best way to cut through a stubborn branch is to jump up and down on it while cutting with said chainsaw, thinking you will be able to hold onto another branch to stop yourself from falling on your chainsaw

I didn't, but then I don't spend much time in Emergency Rooms.

[Iroscato]

Oh, my, I'm sure YOU have some amazing stories...!

We, the members of SDN do collectively demand a thread dedicated to the exploits of Darth Nostril

I'll have to think about that, protecting the identities of the (not so) innocent and all that.

Just replaces names with Giver/Receiver or Perpetrator/Victim where appropriate.

[bilateralrope]

You'll be amazed at some of the things people trip and accidentally fall onto.
"If you're going to accidentally fall onto your cell phone and it somehow makes it's way into your rectum, please have the foresight to tell your friends beforehand to not keep calling you every five minutes."

Especially when you are in prison.

[Broomstick]

Yeah, guys, if you want to HIDE a cellphone up your ass you might want to turn the ringer down, put it on vibrate, or just have calls go straight to voice mail.

[InsaneTD]

That sounds like you are speaking from experience...




Edit: Autocorrect on my phone. Should fix that.

[Broomstick]

Please, that orifice is "exit only" for this gal.

Once upon I did work at a clinic, though... and there are a lot of medical people in my family. Stories get told and re-told.

[bilateralrope]

Yeah, guys, if you want to HIDE a cellphone up your ass you might want to turn the ringer down, put it on vibrate, or just have calls go straight to voice mail.

Turning the phone off seems so obvious to us.

Assuming the phone wasn't turned on accidentally while up there.