British politician says Putin advised by Aliens

[dragon]

Not sure how trustworthy HNGN is but found numerous other sites to back it oup. The politician is a self admitted alien off spring. Seriously how do these people get elected.

Simon Parkes, self-admitted son of a 9-foot-tall green alien, told an audience of about 30 people in Wallsend, North Tyneside, that Putin's aggression in Ukraine can be explained by the intervention of the reptilian alien race, the Nordics, reported the Daily Express

By Taylor Tyler | Feb 23, 2015 01:42 PM EST

Parkes
Simon Parkes holding a drawing of an alien. (Photo : Getty Images)

Russian President Vladimir Putin is being advised on the conflict in Ukraine by an alien race known as the Nordics, according to one North Yorkshire, England, Labour politician.

Simon Parkes, who says he is the son of a 9-foot-tall green alien, told an audience of about 30 people in Wallsend, North Tyneside, that Putin's aggression in Ukraine can be explained by the intervention of the reptilian alien race, the Nordics, reported the Daily Express.

Putin was previously being advised by a different alien group, Parkes said, but the Nordics made an offer he couldn't refuse.

"Putin had been part of a group advised by reptiles," said Parkes, who claims he's had hundreds of alien encounters. "Nordics made a counter offer to Putin."

"The technology the Nordics are giving to Putin is on a par with America," Parkes continued. "The Nordics have told Putin he no longer has to toe the American line, hence his resistance."

Parkes also told the audience that his legal father is a reptile, and previously claimed that he fathered an extraterrestrial child named Zarka. His otherworldly love affair has put strain on his marriage, he said.

In June, 2013, Parkes confessed that his real mother is a 9-foot-tall green alien with eight "stick-like" fingers.

Speaking on his beliefs in 2012, Parkes said, "For many people who don't experience it, it's very hard to accept," The Guardian reported.

"We are taught to only see and believe what we can touch, but it's acceptable to believe in religion," he said. "It's a personal matter and it doesn't affect my work. I'm more interested in fixing someone's leaking roof or potholes. People don't want me to talk about aliens."

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[Crazedwraith]

A quick google shows he's a town councillor, not exactly a bigshot politician.

And apparently no one cares if he believes in aliens so long as he makes the trains run on time/fixes the potholes.

[Zaune]

County and municipal councils get to decide what days the bins get emptied and how much baksheesh to charge property developers wanting to plonk a bunch of jerry-built McMansions down and that's pretty much it; you can get elected to them simply by being memorable enough to get your name in the local newspaper.

[loomer]

Bullshit, the Nordics aren't Reptoids.

[Raw Shark]

Bullshit, the Nordics aren't Reptoids.

Parkes himself obviously knows the difference, because he claims that one stole influence over Putin from the other (though he is clearly biased in that conflict, because Reptoid Mom); the writer of the article confused the two.

I'd love to know what technologies this guy thinks the Nordics gave Russia to give them parity with the US, and why, if they're handing out goodies to their pawns, they wouldn't give them superior toys?

County and municipal councils get to decide what days the bins get emptied and how much baksheesh to charge property developers wanting to plonk a bunch of jerry-built McMansions down and that's pretty much it; you can get elected to them simply by being memorable enough to get your name in the local newspaper.

Yeah, I'd wager that this guy actually got elected because he's such a moonbeam and it makes him stand out. After that, all he's got to do is actually get those potholes fixed and he keeps the job.

[Iroscato]

As much as I'd like to think two powerful extraterrestrial races are fighting over humanity's soul, I really can't help but think it requires a rather inflated opinion of oneself.
Or just a healthy dosing of lunacy, I suppose.

[Raw Shark]

As much as I'd like to think two powerful extraterrestrial races are fighting over humanity's soul, I really can't help but think it requires a rather inflated opinion of oneself.
Or just a healthy dosing of lunacy, I suppose.

Seriously. If any species advanced enough to reach our solar system right now took any kind of interest in us at all, it would at best be on the level of zookeepers or anthropologists.

"Observe and discuss their struggle for petty dominance. Occasionally they bear primitive but formidable weapons of mass destruction such as the atomic bomb against one another. Diplomacy is sorely underdeveloped on this world."

[SpottedKitty]

"Observe and discuss their struggle for petty dominance. Occasionally they bear primitive but formidable weapons of mass destruction such as the atomic bomb against one another. Diplomacy is sorely underdeveloped on this world."

I'm trying to decide if that sounds better from an alien who looks suspiciously similar to David Attenborough, or an alien who looks suspiciously similar to James Burke.

(Does anyone else out there still remember a certain Phil Cool sketch...?)

[Darth Nostril]

(Does anyone else out there still remember a certain Phil Cool sketch...?)

Oh fuck yes nearly wet myself laughing when that was originally broadcast, afterward, whenever my brother and I saw Terry on tv touching his guests knees "he's doing it again, he's copulating with them!"
Hey when you're 14 that's the epitome of humour.

[KroLazuxy_87]

Seriously. If any species advanced enough to reach our solar system right now took any kind of interest in us at all, it would at best be on the level of zookeepers or anthropologists.

Maybe we're the intergalactic equivalent of a reality TV show. Nordic interference could be equated to a show's producers stepping in to start shit behind the scenes for better ratings. After all, who wants to watch a show where everyone gets along? War and strife makes for better television.

**Edit**
Realized a bit late how old this thread was... My bad for the necro.