You know you're in an RPG when . . .

Yogi · Post by **Yogi** » 2003-03-24 01:04pm

http://project-apollo.net/text/rpg.html

The complete list of Console RPG Clishes

Darksider · Post by **Darksider** » 2003-03-24 04:00pm

[Quote]
George W. Bush Geography Simplification Initiative
Every country in the world will have exactly one town in it, except for the country you start out in, which will have three.

[paranoid] I KNEW he was planning somthing [paranoid]

J/k

SHODAN · Post by **SHODAN** » 2003-03-24 04:05pm

Sephiroth Memorial Escape Clause
Any misdeed up to and including multiple genocide is forgiveable if you're cool enough.

Darksider · Post by **Darksider** » 2003-03-24 04:10pm

[quote]
Wait! That Was A Load-Bearing Boss!
Defeating a dungeon's boss creature will frequently cause the dungeon to collapse, which is nonsensical but does make for thrilling escape scenes.

Mark S · Post by **Mark S** » 2003-03-24 05:03pm

I know the difference between fantasy and reality. I made my saving throw.

2000AD · Post by **2000AD** » 2003-03-24 05:06pm

Funny, but they missed one:

Whole armies will have been defeated by one enemy, but said enemy will be defeated by your warrior, or small band of warriors.

Sir Sirius · Post by **Sir Sirius** » 2003-03-24 05:07pm

104. Place Transvestite Joke Here (Miss Cloud Rule)
If the male lead is required to dress up like a girl for any reason, he will be regarded by everyone as much more attractive than any "real" girl. If the female lead cross-dresses as a man, she will be immediately recognized as who she is by everyone except the male lead and the main villain.

Andrew J. · Post by **Andrew J.** » 2003-03-24 05:30pm

It's funny 'cause it's true.

Post by **Ghost Rider** » 2003-03-24 06:02pm

Some are good, but a few too many are selective of only certain games and in fact ruin the whole point of cliche.

Post by **Gandalf** » 2003-03-24 06:31pm

ROTFLMAO!

Post by **RogueIce** » 2003-03-24 07:29pm

"Mommy, why didn't they just use a Phoenix Down on Aeris?"
Don't expect battle mechanics to carry over into the "real world."

All The Time In The World (Rinoa Rule)
Unless there's a running countdown clock right there on the screen, you have as long as you want to complete any task -- such as, say, rescuing a friend who's hanging by one hand from a slippery cliff edge thousands of feet in the air -- no matter how incredibly urgent it is. Dawdle or hurry as you will, you'll always make it just in the nick of time.

hehe

LT.Hit-Man · Post by **LT.Hit-Man** » 2003-03-25 12:34am

Har har that's cool thanks for posting it.

Durandal · Post by **Durandal** » 2003-03-25 12:46am

You know you're in a RPG when you're shot at exceedingly high velocity toward a target and then die in a huge explosion.

<Dodges tomatoes>

Thank you, thank you. I'm here the rest of the week.

Yogi · Post by **Yogi** » 2003-03-25 02:34am

I especially liked
172. Adam Smith's Revenge
By the end of the game you are renowned everywhere as the Legendary Heroes, every surviving government and authority figure has rallied behind you, the fate of the world is obviously hanging in the balance, and out of nowhere random passers-by give you a pat on the back and heartfelt good luck wishes. However, shopkeepers won't even give you a discount, much less free supplies for the final battle with evil.

phongn · Post by **phongn** » 2003-03-25 11:04am

Durandal wrote:You know you're in a RPG when you're shot at exceedingly high velocity toward a target and then die in a huge explosion.

<Dodges tomatoes>

Thank you, thank you. I'm here the rest of the week.

I think that your new moderator status is getting to your head.

Post by **Zaia** » 2003-03-25 11:59am

169: Pyrrhic Victory
By the time you've gotten it in gear, dealt with your miscellaneous personal crises and are finally ready to go Save the World once and for all, nine-tenths of it will already have been destroyed. Still, you've got to give your all to save the remaining one-tenth.

That one's my favourite, I think. Oh, and I like 172 too. Actually, they're all pretty damn funny.

Jadeite · Post by **Jadeite** » 2003-03-25 03:49pm

Zidane's Curse (or, Dirty Pair Rule)
An unlucky condition in which every major city in the game will coincidentally wind up being destroyed just after the hero arrives.

Durandal · Post by **Durandal** » 2003-03-25 04:39pm

phongn wrote:
Durandal wrote:You know you're in a RPG when you're shot at exceedingly high velocity toward a target and then die in a huge explosion.

<Dodges tomatoes>

Thank you, thank you. I'm here the rest of the week.
I think that your new moderator status is getting to your head.

They're totally unrelated. I just saw two opportunities for bad puns yesterday, and I grabbed them like they were Rachel Leigh Cook's tits.

InnerBrat · Post by **InnerBrat** » 2003-03-26 02:29pm

Right, that does it, I'm changing my sig...

Post by **Zaia** » 2003-03-26 02:50pm

innerbrat wrote:Right, that does it, I'm changing my sig...

ROTF!!!!!!!!!!

Joe · Post by **Joe** » 2003-03-26 02:56pm

Durandal wrote:
phongn wrote:
Durandal wrote:You know you're in a RPG when you're shot at exceedingly high velocity toward a target and then die in a huge explosion.

<Dodges tomatoes>

Thank you, thank you. I'm here the rest of the week.
I think that your new moderator status is getting to your head.
They're totally unrelated. I just saw two opportunities for bad puns yesterday, and I grabbed them like they were Rachel Leigh Cook's tits.

Really, hmm, I always thought of her as the poor man's Natalie Portman.

RedImperator · Post by **RedImperator** » 2003-03-26 06:31pm

Durran Korr wrote:
They're totally unrelated. I just saw two opportunities for bad puns yesterday, and I grabbed them like they were Rachel Leigh Cook's tits.
Really, hmm, I always thought of her as the poor man's Natalie Portman.

So, you're saying you wouldn't grab her tits, then? What the hell is the matter with you?

Joe · Post by **Joe** » 2003-03-26 06:33pm

Nah, she's just not the first person that comes to mind, y'know?

RedImperator · Post by **RedImperator** » 2003-03-26 06:51pm

Durran Korr wrote:Nah, she's just not the first person that comes to mind, y'know?

Hmm. To each his own (I would have said Kristen Muranaga).

irishmick79 · Post by **irishmick79** » 2003-03-26 06:53pm

Okay...while this one applies to more live RPG gaming than computer gaming, I think this is a good indicator of when you know you are in an RPG...

During battle, you say you want to rip your opponent's arms out of their sockets, and beat your opponent to death with his own dismembered arms. The GM sighs, looks pained, and says "I'll allow it".