DRUNK SANTA SUIT GUY: Where's the party at, man?
YOUR DRIVER: What kind of party are you looking for?
DRUNK SANTA SUIT GUY: Take me to where the hoh hoh hohs are at!
MORE Conversations From the Professional Front Lines
Moderator: Edi
Re: MORE Conversations From the Professional Front Lines
"Do I really look like a guy with a plan? Y'know what I am? I'm a dog chasing cars. I wouldn't know what to do with one if I caught it! Y'know, I just do things..." --The Joker
Re: MORE Conversations From the Professional Front Lines
So, did you take him to the nearest busy alleyway?
Me: Nope, that's why I have you around to tell me.
Nitram: You -are- beautiful. Anyone tries to tell you otherwise kill them.
"A life is like a garden. Perfect moments can be had, but not preserved, except in memory. LLAP" -- Leonard Nimoy, last Tweet
Re: MORE Conversations From the Professional Front Lines
Nah, I took him to the only place I knew of that was doing ladies' night on Boxing Day. Guys who say ho are looking for slutty girls; if they want an actual prostitute they usually say whore or hooker, or, occasionally, the more formal technical term.LadyTevar wrote:So, did you take him to the nearest busy alleyway?
"Do I really look like a guy with a plan? Y'know what I am? I'm a dog chasing cars. I wouldn't know what to do with one if I caught it! Y'know, I just do things..." --The Joker
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The Grim Squeaker
- Emperor's Hand
- Posts: 10315
- Joined: 2005-06-01 01:44am
- Location: A different time-space Continuum
- Contact:
Re: MORE Conversations From the Professional Front Lines
First day at the new company. A young looking guy asks me to find some time to sit and chat (I assume he's a team leader).
Eventually, we sit, with him on a bean bag on the floor. He mentions that it's the first time they've added someone without him talking to the person first (it's a 2 year old, 18 person company. Everyone's hand-picked).
He mentions their vision, and way of doing things. He asks me what my goals are from the year:
Me: "Ummm, not to get fired? Annnd to get at least another research paper out in my spare time"
[MY research is unrelated to the company].
Later on, I twig that he's the CEO.
Great first impression, huh?
(He's a really nice guy. He did say that he hopes I find a more grandiose goal to pursue)
Eventually, we sit, with him on a bean bag on the floor. He mentions that it's the first time they've added someone without him talking to the person first (it's a 2 year old, 18 person company. Everyone's hand-picked).
He mentions their vision, and way of doing things. He asks me what my goals are from the year:
Me: "Ummm, not to get fired? Annnd to get at least another research paper out in my spare time"
[MY research is unrelated to the company].
Later on, I twig that he's the CEO.
Great first impression, huh?
(He's a really nice guy. He did say that he hopes I find a more grandiose goal to pursue
)Photography
Genius is always allowed some leeway, once the hammer has been pried from its hands and the blood has been cleaned up.
To improve is to change; to be perfect is to change often.
Genius is always allowed some leeway, once the hammer has been pried from its hands and the blood has been cleaned up.
To improve is to change; to be perfect is to change often.
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Broomstick
- Emperor's Hand
- Posts: 28830
- Joined: 2004-01-02 07:04pm
- Location: Industrial armpit of the US Midwest
Re: MORE Conversations From the Professional Front Lines
So, on Monday we had this nasty ice storm. By which I mean which has a substance closely resembling soggy, crushed ice falling out of the sky. This affected the trailer on one of the big delivery trucks for our store. So there it was, sitting in a loading dock, with the roof of the trailer sagging down/inward, jamming the door, and threatening collapse.
The driver told one of our peon guys to climb up on the trailer and shovel it off.
The guy said no.
The driver tried another guy. He was told to go fuck himself.
Apparently this was not the answer he was looking for, or the attitude, so he complained to management. As it happened, he got my boss, who looks like a nice, pleasant woman in her 40's. He complained that the peons where telling him to have intercourse with himself. She inquired as to why they might be saying that, the circumstances involved, and so forth. So he told her.
She said "go fuck yourself".
This resulted in more sputtering protests. My boss asked him why he didn't shovel it off himself. He said it was a safety issue for his company. My boss said "BINGO! Go fuck yourself."
I'm really glad I wasn't involved in that mess. But it's nice to know management where I work actually does follow some reasonable safety rules.
The driver told one of our peon guys to climb up on the trailer and shovel it off.
The guy said no.
The driver tried another guy. He was told to go fuck himself.
Apparently this was not the answer he was looking for, or the attitude, so he complained to management. As it happened, he got my boss, who looks like a nice, pleasant woman in her 40's. He complained that the peons where telling him to have intercourse with himself. She inquired as to why they might be saying that, the circumstances involved, and so forth. So he told her.
She said "go fuck yourself".
This resulted in more sputtering protests. My boss asked him why he didn't shovel it off himself. He said it was a safety issue for his company. My boss said "BINGO! Go fuck yourself."
I'm really glad I wasn't involved in that mess. But it's nice to know management where I work actually does follow some reasonable safety rules.
A life is like a garden. Perfect moments can be had, but not preserved, except in memory. Leonard Nimoy.
Now I did a job. I got nothing but trouble since I did it, not to mention more than a few unkind words as regard to my character so let me make this abundantly clear. I do the job. And then I get paid.- Malcolm Reynolds, Captain of Serenity, which sums up my feelings regarding the lawsuit discussed here.
If a free society cannot help the many who are poor, it cannot save the few who are rich. - John F. Kennedy
Sam Vimes Theory of Economic Injustice
Now I did a job. I got nothing but trouble since I did it, not to mention more than a few unkind words as regard to my character so let me make this abundantly clear. I do the job. And then I get paid.- Malcolm Reynolds, Captain of Serenity, which sums up my feelings regarding the lawsuit discussed here.
If a free society cannot help the many who are poor, it cannot save the few who are rich. - John F. Kennedy
Sam Vimes Theory of Economic Injustice
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Napoleon the Clown
- Jedi Council Member
- Posts: 2446
- Joined: 2007-05-05 02:54pm
- Location: Minneso'a
Re: MORE Conversations From the Professional Front Lines
Broomstick, your boss is awesome.
Your story reminded me about my Costco run last night. Relevant bit is that the truck with some of my wife's prescriptions had only arrived about half an hour before we got there due to the roads being utter shit. It was supposed to get there around 10 am, but didn't get there until 7 pm. The pharmacist said that some Costco locations couldn't even fill prescriptions because their trucks didn't get there until after the pharmacies had closed.
Your story reminded me about my Costco run last night. Relevant bit is that the truck with some of my wife's prescriptions had only arrived about half an hour before we got there due to the roads being utter shit. It was supposed to get there around 10 am, but didn't get there until 7 pm. The pharmacist said that some Costco locations couldn't even fill prescriptions because their trucks didn't get there until after the pharmacies had closed.
Sig images are for people who aren't fucking lazy.
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Broomstick
- Emperor's Hand
- Posts: 28830
- Joined: 2004-01-02 07:04pm
- Location: Industrial armpit of the US Midwest
Re: MORE Conversations From the Professional Front Lines
Yeah, I do have a decent boss. Even better, her boss backs her up, too.
I kind of questioned the wisdom of our side using one of our big forklifts to get the door off the trailer and get our merchandise, but then, there is a safety cage on that thing providing some protection to the guy driving it. Anyhow, it seems we're not on the hook for paying for anything, including the trailer's door. Frankly, that trailer may be a loss anyway.
We were on just the fringe of that storm, you folks out west got hit much harder. I was glad I didn't have to go anywhere on Monday although I did venture out a few times to make sure the road's storm drain was kept clear. Still had times with ankle-deep water on the street because of how much was coming down either still wet or melting immediately. Our roof sprung new leaks, but when I went back to work today it seems a LOT of people had the same problem, including my place of employment which had water pouring down the inside of the receiving department (kind of a bad day at the loading dock all around I guess)
Been managing to get out of my driveway OK, although I did get stuck coming back in yesterday. I had to both dig out the wheels and deploy the bag of kitty-litter I keep in the trunk in the event of needing extra traction. The wet, sloppy shit just kept coming down. Couldn't figure out why I had sore muscles today until I remember that... oh, yeah, shoveling wet, heavy slush and ice chunks, yeah, maybe that had something to do with that.
Two days of cold, wet and wind. I have several pairs of footwear still drying out. At least I had dry shoes and socks for work today.
Oh, yeah, the roof leaks - the birds found one of them before we did. Three parrots taking a shower/bath under a leaking roof and protesting when we insisted they move so we could deploy a bucket. I was cold and wet enough, THEN I had three soggy birds wanting to cuddle up with me...
I kind of questioned the wisdom of our side using one of our big forklifts to get the door off the trailer and get our merchandise, but then, there is a safety cage on that thing providing some protection to the guy driving it. Anyhow, it seems we're not on the hook for paying for anything, including the trailer's door. Frankly, that trailer may be a loss anyway.
We were on just the fringe of that storm, you folks out west got hit much harder. I was glad I didn't have to go anywhere on Monday although I did venture out a few times to make sure the road's storm drain was kept clear. Still had times with ankle-deep water on the street because of how much was coming down either still wet or melting immediately. Our roof sprung new leaks, but when I went back to work today it seems a LOT of people had the same problem, including my place of employment which had water pouring down the inside of the receiving department (kind of a bad day at the loading dock all around I guess)
Been managing to get out of my driveway OK, although I did get stuck coming back in yesterday. I had to both dig out the wheels and deploy the bag of kitty-litter I keep in the trunk in the event of needing extra traction. The wet, sloppy shit just kept coming down. Couldn't figure out why I had sore muscles today until I remember that... oh, yeah, shoveling wet, heavy slush and ice chunks, yeah, maybe that had something to do with that.
Two days of cold, wet and wind. I have several pairs of footwear still drying out. At least I had dry shoes and socks for work today.
Oh, yeah, the roof leaks - the birds found one of them before we did. Three parrots taking a shower/bath under a leaking roof and protesting when we insisted they move so we could deploy a bucket. I was cold and wet enough, THEN I had three soggy birds wanting to cuddle up with me...
A life is like a garden. Perfect moments can be had, but not preserved, except in memory. Leonard Nimoy.
Now I did a job. I got nothing but trouble since I did it, not to mention more than a few unkind words as regard to my character so let me make this abundantly clear. I do the job. And then I get paid.- Malcolm Reynolds, Captain of Serenity, which sums up my feelings regarding the lawsuit discussed here.
If a free society cannot help the many who are poor, it cannot save the few who are rich. - John F. Kennedy
Sam Vimes Theory of Economic Injustice
Now I did a job. I got nothing but trouble since I did it, not to mention more than a few unkind words as regard to my character so let me make this abundantly clear. I do the job. And then I get paid.- Malcolm Reynolds, Captain of Serenity, which sums up my feelings regarding the lawsuit discussed here.
If a free society cannot help the many who are poor, it cannot save the few who are rich. - John F. Kennedy
Sam Vimes Theory of Economic Injustice
Re: MORE Conversations From the Professional Front Lines
Sand or sandy gravel usually a heck of a lot cheaper than kitty litter (free, if you're near a beach) if you're in a pinch. You can probably get some free from a quarry/landscaping supply too, where they sell gravel for $7.50/ton instead of /bag.Broomstick wrote:Yeah, I do have a decent boss. Even better, her boss backs her up, too.
Been managing to get out of my driveway OK, although I did get stuck coming back in yesterday. I had to both dig out the wheels and deploy the bag of kitty-litter I keep in the trunk in the event of needing extra traction. The wet, sloppy shit just kept coming down. Couldn't figure out why I had sore muscles today until I remember that... oh, yeah, shoveling wet, heavy slush and ice chunks, yeah, maybe that had something to do with that.
We adjusted our payroll schedule over Christmas so everyone got paid 3 weeks instead of 2 this cycle, which our director of finance announced with details in an all-company email. Some people didn't get auto-deposit at midnight-sharp as a result. One guy on my team, who doesn't 'get' what's appropriate and not sometimes, replied to the email saying he hadn't gotten paid. Specifically, he replied ALL, to the entire company - new hires, board of directors, the works. Got kudos from my manager on how I ran damage-control, at least.
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Broomstick
- Emperor's Hand
- Posts: 28830
- Joined: 2004-01-02 07:04pm
- Location: Industrial armpit of the US Midwest
Re: MORE Conversations From the Professional Front Lines
Well, yeah, except
1) the kitty litter comes in a handy, securely sealed bag
2) I need it about once every two years
3) And between waiting for a sale and an employee discount it's dirt cheap.
The slight uptick in cost is balanced by the convenience.
1) the kitty litter comes in a handy, securely sealed bag
2) I need it about once every two years
3) And between waiting for a sale and an employee discount it's dirt cheap.
The slight uptick in cost is balanced by the convenience.
A life is like a garden. Perfect moments can be had, but not preserved, except in memory. Leonard Nimoy.
Now I did a job. I got nothing but trouble since I did it, not to mention more than a few unkind words as regard to my character so let me make this abundantly clear. I do the job. And then I get paid.- Malcolm Reynolds, Captain of Serenity, which sums up my feelings regarding the lawsuit discussed here.
If a free society cannot help the many who are poor, it cannot save the few who are rich. - John F. Kennedy
Sam Vimes Theory of Economic Injustice
Now I did a job. I got nothing but trouble since I did it, not to mention more than a few unkind words as regard to my character so let me make this abundantly clear. I do the job. And then I get paid.- Malcolm Reynolds, Captain of Serenity, which sums up my feelings regarding the lawsuit discussed here.
If a free society cannot help the many who are poor, it cannot save the few who are rich. - John F. Kennedy
Sam Vimes Theory of Economic Injustice
Re: MORE Conversations From the Professional Front Lines
Fair enough. Up here most people I see who have bags of <substance> for snow removal use it frequently enough that they could afford winter tires instead, but if you only need it on rare occasion the convenience is dandy.Broomstick wrote:Well, yeah, except
1) the kitty litter comes in a handy, securely sealed bag
2) I need it about once every two years
3) And between waiting for a sale and an employee discount it's dirt cheap.
The slight uptick in cost is balanced by the convenience.
Re: MORE Conversations From the Professional Front Lines
I don't have as much experience in snow as some of the other posters here, but I spent enough time in Wyoming to know that if you need kitty litter every day to get out of a parking spot...then you're doing it wrong. People who live with snowy winters know how to park so that it will be easier to get out later and only need kitty litter for worse-than-normal circumstances.Fair enough. Up here most people I see who have bags of <substance> for snow removal use it frequently enough that they could afford winter tires instead, but if you only need it on rare occasion the convenience is dandy.
You will be assimilated...bunghole!
Re: MORE Conversations From the Professional Front Lines
I have a brand-new, lifted Subaru with dedicated winter tires so I can park pretty much anywhere short of on a ski hill. Several of my neighbors, however, have older cars that run bald , bought-used all-seasons or even summer tires year round. A bloke down the street from me nerfed his brand-new heavy-duty pickup truck into an ice wall last year because he had ~24" rims and track tires. Ontario gets snowy winters but there's no shortage of people who have no idea what's safe.
The province just announced that it's forcing auto insurance companies to give breaks for using winter rubber; Quebec makes it mandatory, but that's not entirely reasonable for people who use their cars very seldom, have a fair-weather-only classic, or are simply financially unable to buy winter tires but know how to not be a moron in bad conditions.
The province just announced that it's forcing auto insurance companies to give breaks for using winter rubber; Quebec makes it mandatory, but that's not entirely reasonable for people who use their cars very seldom, have a fair-weather-only classic, or are simply financially unable to buy winter tires but know how to not be a moron in bad conditions.
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Broomstick
- Emperor's Hand
- Posts: 28830
- Joined: 2004-01-02 07:04pm
- Location: Industrial armpit of the US Midwest
Re: MORE Conversations From the Professional Front Lines
Knowing how to drive the vehicle you're in makes a huge difference - my car is less capable than many vehicles, and my pick-up even worse, but I fair better than many with 4-wheel drives and other fancy accoutrements because I drive the vehicle I'm in, not the vehicle I fantasize about.
My truck handles deep snow better than my car (not surprising, it sits much higher and has more engine).
My car handles ice and slick conditions better than my truck - but a few days ago it was deep ice, a rather unusual combination. At least I got stuck in the driveway at home and not on the road or in a ditch.
My truck handles deep snow better than my car (not surprising, it sits much higher and has more engine).
My car handles ice and slick conditions better than my truck - but a few days ago it was deep ice, a rather unusual combination. At least I got stuck in the driveway at home and not on the road or in a ditch.
A life is like a garden. Perfect moments can be had, but not preserved, except in memory. Leonard Nimoy.
Now I did a job. I got nothing but trouble since I did it, not to mention more than a few unkind words as regard to my character so let me make this abundantly clear. I do the job. And then I get paid.- Malcolm Reynolds, Captain of Serenity, which sums up my feelings regarding the lawsuit discussed here.
If a free society cannot help the many who are poor, it cannot save the few who are rich. - John F. Kennedy
Sam Vimes Theory of Economic Injustice
Now I did a job. I got nothing but trouble since I did it, not to mention more than a few unkind words as regard to my character so let me make this abundantly clear. I do the job. And then I get paid.- Malcolm Reynolds, Captain of Serenity, which sums up my feelings regarding the lawsuit discussed here.
If a free society cannot help the many who are poor, it cannot save the few who are rich. - John F. Kennedy
Sam Vimes Theory of Economic Injustice
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Simon_Jester
- Emperor's Hand
- Posts: 30165
- Joined: 2009-05-23 07:29pm
Re: MORE Conversations From the Professional Front Lines
Yeah. Shallow ice is normal, deep snow is normal. Deep ice basically requires a very prolonged period of almost-freezing temperatures, with heavy precipitation throughout but little or no change in temperature during the period of slush-fall.
We get it fairly often in the DC area relative to other kinds of winter precipitation, but that's mostly because it only rarely gets well below freezing around here. We spend most of the winter in conditions where there is a lot of precipitation falling out of the sky at temperatures of around 30 degrees Fahrenheit, so we get a lot of slush per unit of snow.
Of course, we also have the tremendous advantage of winter rains that wash away accumulated ice and snow quite neatly- it doesn't always happen but it happens often enough to help.
We get it fairly often in the DC area relative to other kinds of winter precipitation, but that's mostly because it only rarely gets well below freezing around here. We spend most of the winter in conditions where there is a lot of precipitation falling out of the sky at temperatures of around 30 degrees Fahrenheit, so we get a lot of slush per unit of snow.
Of course, we also have the tremendous advantage of winter rains that wash away accumulated ice and snow quite neatly- it doesn't always happen but it happens often enough to help.
This space dedicated to Vasily Arkhipov
Re: MORE Conversations From the Professional Front Lines
YOUR DRIVER: So, it's got to be this one, right?
DRUNK GUY: No, this isn't it. I need you to take me to the Marriott downtown!
YOUR DRIVER: Look, pal, we've been to every Marriott downtown. I took you to the City Center Marriott, the Courtyard Marriott, and both Residence Inn Marriotts. This one is the next closest; we're not even downtown anymore. Are you sure it's downtown?
DRUNK GUY: Yeah!
YOUR DRIVER: And you're sure it's a Marriott?
DRUNK GUY: Yes! Just take me to the downtown Marriott!
YOUR DRIVER: That's what I'm trying to do... Can you describe the building at all?
DRUNK GUY: It has a big pink sign that says "HOTEL" on it. You're the cab driver, how hard is this? Just find it!
YOUR DRIVER: Okay, the only hotel with a big pink sign that just says hotel anywhere near downtown is the Ramada on Speer and Zuni...
DRUNK GUY: That's it! I'm staying at the Ramada Marriott!
DRUNK GUY: No, this isn't it. I need you to take me to the Marriott downtown!
YOUR DRIVER: Look, pal, we've been to every Marriott downtown. I took you to the City Center Marriott, the Courtyard Marriott, and both Residence Inn Marriotts. This one is the next closest; we're not even downtown anymore. Are you sure it's downtown?
DRUNK GUY: Yeah!
YOUR DRIVER: And you're sure it's a Marriott?
DRUNK GUY: Yes! Just take me to the downtown Marriott!
YOUR DRIVER: That's what I'm trying to do... Can you describe the building at all?
DRUNK GUY: It has a big pink sign that says "HOTEL" on it. You're the cab driver, how hard is this? Just find it!
YOUR DRIVER: Okay, the only hotel with a big pink sign that just says hotel anywhere near downtown is the Ramada on Speer and Zuni...
DRUNK GUY: That's it! I'm staying at the Ramada Marriott!
"Do I really look like a guy with a plan? Y'know what I am? I'm a dog chasing cars. I wouldn't know what to do with one if I caught it! Y'know, I just do things..." --The Joker
Re: MORE Conversations From the Professional Front Lines
VERY DRUNK STRIPPER: The cops are here! Why did you call the cops on me!?
YOUR DRIVER: Uh, I not only didn't call the cops, but also objected to you doing it.
VERY DRUNK STRIPPER: But I'm on felony probation! Now I'm going back to jail, asshole!
YOUR DRIVER: Again, I am not the asshole here, and in fact tried to stop you. You created this situation, and now you have to deal with it.
VERY DRUNK STRIPPER: I'm not getting out of the car until they're gone!
YOUR DRIVER: They're not going to leave until you get out. Here's what you need to do: One, pull your shit together. Two, pay me what you owe me. Three, get out of the car and walk to your apartment without stumbling like you're fucking wasted. Got it?
VERY DRUNK STRIPPER: Yeah. Here's thirty bucks, is that enough?
YOUR DRIVER: That's fine. Ready?
VERY DRUNK STRIPPER: Yeah, thanks. You're the greatest, sweetheart. [gets out of the cab and promptly falls flat on her face, dumping the contents of her purse everywhere]
YOUR DRIVER: [facepalm]
YOUR DRIVER: Uh, I not only didn't call the cops, but also objected to you doing it.
VERY DRUNK STRIPPER: But I'm on felony probation! Now I'm going back to jail, asshole!
YOUR DRIVER: Again, I am not the asshole here, and in fact tried to stop you. You created this situation, and now you have to deal with it.
VERY DRUNK STRIPPER: I'm not getting out of the car until they're gone!
YOUR DRIVER: They're not going to leave until you get out. Here's what you need to do: One, pull your shit together. Two, pay me what you owe me. Three, get out of the car and walk to your apartment without stumbling like you're fucking wasted. Got it?
VERY DRUNK STRIPPER: Yeah. Here's thirty bucks, is that enough?
YOUR DRIVER: That's fine. Ready?
VERY DRUNK STRIPPER: Yeah, thanks. You're the greatest, sweetheart. [gets out of the cab and promptly falls flat on her face, dumping the contents of her purse everywhere]
YOUR DRIVER: [facepalm]
"Do I really look like a guy with a plan? Y'know what I am? I'm a dog chasing cars. I wouldn't know what to do with one if I caught it! Y'know, I just do things..." --The Joker
Re: MORE Conversations From the Professional Front Lines
Did she call the cops? Or get their attention somehow? Or were they just randomly outside her apartment?
Re: MORE Conversations From the Professional Front Lines
She totally called them, in my back seat, after I told her not to. Her friends weren't home, so she dialed 911 and said they were locking her out and holding her possessions hostage for the purpose of extortion (she doesn't have keys to the place) instead of waiting for them like a reasonable person, because she is apparently in tremendous debt to them and/or a fucking paranoid lunatic. Then she told me that she'd dropped her money where I picked her up, so I tried to race the cops and anyone else who happened by to that location, and to race the cops back, so I could get paid, but we didn't make it back before they arrived. By that time, she had forgotten calling them.
"Do I really look like a guy with a plan? Y'know what I am? I'm a dog chasing cars. I wouldn't know what to do with one if I caught it! Y'know, I just do things..." --The Joker
Re: MORE Conversations From the Professional Front Lines
MY FAVORITE HOMELESS GUY: Hi, there, my friend! Why is a pick-pocket the opposite of a peeping Tom?
YOUR DRIVER: Hey, [Favorite Homeless Guy], long time, no see! I dunno, why?
MY FAVORITE HOMELESS GUY: Well, a pick-pocket snatches watches...
YOUR DRIVER: Nice. I found you some smokes. They're probably stale, by now, but they're all yours if you want 'em. What happened to you anyway?
MY FAVORITE HOMELESS GUY: Thank you very much! I had to go away for a while.
YOUR DRIVER: You? Seriously? What for?
MY FAVORITE HOMELESS GUY: I dunno, I guess they decided I needed a vacation...
YOUR DRIVER: Hey, [Favorite Homeless Guy], long time, no see! I dunno, why?
MY FAVORITE HOMELESS GUY: Well, a pick-pocket snatches watches...
YOUR DRIVER: Nice. I found you some smokes. They're probably stale, by now, but they're all yours if you want 'em. What happened to you anyway?
MY FAVORITE HOMELESS GUY: Thank you very much! I had to go away for a while.
YOUR DRIVER: You? Seriously? What for?
MY FAVORITE HOMELESS GUY: I dunno, I guess they decided I needed a vacation...
"Do I really look like a guy with a plan? Y'know what I am? I'm a dog chasing cars. I wouldn't know what to do with one if I caught it! Y'know, I just do things..." --The Joker
Re: MORE Conversations From the Professional Front Lines
At the Call Center, we have two types of computerized calls. One is auto-dial, where all we have to do is wait for someone to pick up the other end. The other is manual dial, and leads to this interesting little conversation.
Co-Worker: So, is this sample auto-dial?
Supervisor 1: Yep, you're all good.
Supervisor 2: Yeah, no need for a hand-job.
All those in earshot break down laughing.
Co-Worker: So, is this sample auto-dial?
Supervisor 1: Yep, you're all good.
Supervisor 2: Yeah, no need for a hand-job.
All those in earshot break down laughing.
Me: Nope, that's why I have you around to tell me.
Nitram: You -are- beautiful. Anyone tries to tell you otherwise kill them.
"A life is like a garden. Perfect moments can be had, but not preserved, except in memory. LLAP" -- Leonard Nimoy, last Tweet
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Broomstick
- Emperor's Hand
- Posts: 28830
- Joined: 2004-01-02 07:04pm
- Location: Industrial armpit of the US Midwest
Re: MORE Conversations From the Professional Front Lines
It's the day before Superbowl Day...
OMIGOD OMIGOD QUICK BUY BEER BUY BOOZE BUY SNACK FOOD BUY BEER BUY DEEP FRIED CHICKEN PARTS BUY BEER BUY MORE BEER ....!
Holy fuck, people are batshit crazy!
OMIGOD OMIGOD QUICK BUY BEER BUY BOOZE BUY SNACK FOOD BUY BEER BUY DEEP FRIED CHICKEN PARTS BUY BEER BUY MORE BEER ....!
Holy fuck, people are batshit crazy!
A life is like a garden. Perfect moments can be had, but not preserved, except in memory. Leonard Nimoy.
Now I did a job. I got nothing but trouble since I did it, not to mention more than a few unkind words as regard to my character so let me make this abundantly clear. I do the job. And then I get paid.- Malcolm Reynolds, Captain of Serenity, which sums up my feelings regarding the lawsuit discussed here.
If a free society cannot help the many who are poor, it cannot save the few who are rich. - John F. Kennedy
Sam Vimes Theory of Economic Injustice
Now I did a job. I got nothing but trouble since I did it, not to mention more than a few unkind words as regard to my character so let me make this abundantly clear. I do the job. And then I get paid.- Malcolm Reynolds, Captain of Serenity, which sums up my feelings regarding the lawsuit discussed here.
If a free society cannot help the many who are poor, it cannot save the few who are rich. - John F. Kennedy
Sam Vimes Theory of Economic Injustice
Re: MORE Conversations From the Professional Front Lines
Yeah, this is why I stocked up on food and beer a week ago. To say that Denver has turned into a zoo full of shit-flinging monkeys this weekend would be an insult to both zoos and shit-flinging monkeys.
"Do I really look like a guy with a plan? Y'know what I am? I'm a dog chasing cars. I wouldn't know what to do with one if I caught it! Y'know, I just do things..." --The Joker
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Broomstick
- Emperor's Hand
- Posts: 28830
- Joined: 2004-01-02 07:04pm
- Location: Industrial armpit of the US Midwest
Re: MORE Conversations From the Professional Front Lines
Indiana is dry (sort of) on Sundays. While normally I think this is stupid, at least for today we'll have fewer wannabe drunks (they'll be hopping the state border to Illinois instead). I expect the morning will remain busy, with business falling off sharply when the pre-game starts.
Several fender-benders in the store parking lot yesterday - seriously, people slow the fuck down and chill.
Several fender-benders in the store parking lot yesterday - seriously, people slow the fuck down and chill.
A life is like a garden. Perfect moments can be had, but not preserved, except in memory. Leonard Nimoy.
Now I did a job. I got nothing but trouble since I did it, not to mention more than a few unkind words as regard to my character so let me make this abundantly clear. I do the job. And then I get paid.- Malcolm Reynolds, Captain of Serenity, which sums up my feelings regarding the lawsuit discussed here.
If a free society cannot help the many who are poor, it cannot save the few who are rich. - John F. Kennedy
Sam Vimes Theory of Economic Injustice
Now I did a job. I got nothing but trouble since I did it, not to mention more than a few unkind words as regard to my character so let me make this abundantly clear. I do the job. And then I get paid.- Malcolm Reynolds, Captain of Serenity, which sums up my feelings regarding the lawsuit discussed here.
If a free society cannot help the many who are poor, it cannot save the few who are rich. - John F. Kennedy
Sam Vimes Theory of Economic Injustice
Re: MORE Conversations From the Professional Front Lines
YOUR DRIVER: Good evening, this is your taxi driver. They're telling me that you're at 21st and Blake, is that correct?
OTHER DRIVER: What? Nah, I'm driving cab #541. Did dispatch give you this number for a customer?
YOUR DRIVER: Of course they did. I think they drink on the job up there. Fuck! This was my first call in like an hour.
OTHER DRIVER: Yeah, it's dead out. I just got off the phone with them because my passenger got arrested. Must've confused them. Forty-two bucks, that guy owed me.
YOUR DRIVER: That's some bullshit. Anyway, I've got to call those clowns and tell them they fucked up again. Good luck out there, amigo.
OTHER DRIVER: Yeah, you have a lovely evening.
OTHER DRIVER: What? Nah, I'm driving cab #541. Did dispatch give you this number for a customer?
YOUR DRIVER: Of course they did. I think they drink on the job up there. Fuck! This was my first call in like an hour.
OTHER DRIVER: Yeah, it's dead out. I just got off the phone with them because my passenger got arrested. Must've confused them. Forty-two bucks, that guy owed me.
YOUR DRIVER: That's some bullshit. Anyway, I've got to call those clowns and tell them they fucked up again. Good luck out there, amigo.
OTHER DRIVER: Yeah, you have a lovely evening.
"Do I really look like a guy with a plan? Y'know what I am? I'm a dog chasing cars. I wouldn't know what to do with one if I caught it! Y'know, I just do things..." --The Joker
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FaxModem1
- Emperor's Hand
- Posts: 7700
- Joined: 2002-10-30 06:40pm
- Location: In a dark reflection of a better world
Re: MORE Conversations From the Professional Front Lines
EMAIL FROM HEADQUARTERS: Congratulations on joining our organization. You are expected to be in San Diego by the 22nd of February.
ME: Can do.
EMAIL: Now, since you reside in the Dallas area, we'll have your training for this job in Dallas.
ME: Sounds fine.
EMAIL: Please be informed that the training will be March 1st through the 4th in Dallas, TX.
ME: Wait a minute.
ME: Can do.
EMAIL: Now, since you reside in the Dallas area, we'll have your training for this job in Dallas.
ME: Sounds fine.
EMAIL: Please be informed that the training will be March 1st through the 4th in Dallas, TX.
ME: Wait a minute.
