Anyone intrested in a "Fucked-up" SD/RPG?

[Typhonis 1]

Hey Mike* Tyler runs up*


What are ya doing we aint got time to download porn from the internet ! Look those idiots are going to come crawling after us and we need to get ready for em

[Micheal Ryans, Beta pilot]

"I'm not downloading porn Tyler. I'm trying to get an uplink to FLEETCOM, but if they want to try and stop me, let them."

As it happens, a pair of expendable ensigns came round the corner and nearly trod on Tyler, who proceeded to whack one over the head his UAM (Unknown Appearing Mallet) repeatedly.

The other made the mistake of trying to stop Mike from accessing the computer. Major error.

As soon as he tried, Mike broke his wrist effortlessly before tossing him into the nearest vent shaft.

"Communication transmitted to FLEETCOM. They advise unable to retrieve presently," Beowulf reported.

"Well damn. I guess we're just gonna have to have some fun with these wimps."

[Typhonis 1]

"I..am....not...a....door....mat "wham wham wham wham wham wham .


Tylr reaches behind him and pulls out a scoped .44 "Blam" A third ensing collapses bonelessly to the deck


You is unlucky punk

So what did your Fleet buddies say Mike?

[Micheal Ryans, Beta pilot]

"No ship in this area, and DUCK!"

Mike sprayed shredder ammo at four more sacrificial ensigns who obviously never learned about suppresion fire.

Unfortunately that left him with no loaded weapons when the next person, a nutcase with a tattoo across his forehead, charged into the corridor.

However Spartans were trained to be resourceful, so Mike took him on hand-to-hand.

With one punch he tore the guys heart out, then snapped his neck effortlessly.

"Don't screw with me bitch," he remarked harshly.

[Typhonis 1]

Hey Mike lookit this *Tyler hands him a phaser pistol*

What the hell is it? a friggin dildo or a shaving implement??

[Micheal Ryans, Beta pilot]

"Damned if I know. Looks like a whacked out razor, but I'd hate to fight using one. You couldn't aim worth a shit with it. Anyway, I'd guess these guys are gonna be pissed about us killing their friends, so we'd better go hide somewhere. And find Gouf, who knows what kind of trouble hes gotten himself into."

********************************

At this point, a supremely pissed-off Hunter was rampaging round one of the cargo bays.

It found a door that could be widened, and proceeded to do so. With a plasma cannon blast.

Fortunately for the Voyager crew, the Hunter found a group of S-8472 infiltrators present on the ship and brutally dismembered them.

That done, it wandered off looking for something else to kill.

[Typhonis 1]

one last thing

*Tyler setss a small box a kneecap level one one side of the hall and a smaller box on the other side,he hits a switch and backs away*OK lets go

[Micheal Ryans, Beta pilot]

"This will be good," Mike stated as they ran.

Then he stopped. They'd rounded the corner, only to come face to face with a Hunter.

"Oh shit," he shouted, scooping up Tyler and running like hell.

*****************************************************

The Hunter charged forward, chasing the Spartan and what its scanners had ID'd as an Earth squirrel.

This was going to be interesting.

[Typhonis 1]

Ok and JUMP whew hope your friend enjoys that little surprise

[Micheal Ryans, Beta pilot]

The light from the explosion whited out Mike's vision for a second, and when it cleared they were a long way away.

"That was close."

*************************************************************

The Hunter picked itself up.

Now it was PISSED.

The first person to cross its patth got a shield rammed through his gut.

[Typhonis 1]

So what was that thing?

[Micheal Ryans, Beta pilot]

"A Hunter. Fully armoured, with a plasma cannon integrated into its left arm. That blast probably only pissed it off."

Mike carried on running, praying the Hunter didn't follow them.

********************************************************

As it happened, said alien montrosity found its way to the bridge of Voyager.

It's first action was to smash open the door and vaporise Lameway with a plasma blast.

It then proceeded to raise hell on the rest of the bridge crew.

[Kuja]

Gouf looked at the massive machine standing in the corridor. *Damn,* he thought. *If that blast barely even hurt it, I'm fucked. Unless...* Reaching around to the small of his back, he drew his hilt, activating the blade of his heat saber. Closing his eye tightly, he whispered "Let's go," and dashed out into the corridor. The Hunter saw him coming, and aimed, but it was too slow. Gouf's heat saber plunged into the arm, damaging the plasma cannon. The Hunter reared, and Gouf used the opportunity to escape. Running down corridor after corridor, knocking over a dozen nameless ensigns, he finally was re-united with Mike and Tyler.

"Guys! he yelled. "There's some big machine running around killing people!"

[Micheal Ryans, Beta pilot]

"We know. We just tried to kill it. I suggest running like hell."

[Kuja]

"So that blast was you huh?" Then, Gouf noticed the comm console. "All RIGHT! Maybe I can use this thing to get a line off to Zeong."

"Who?"

"My commander." Gouf's fingers flew over the keyboard, finally coming to rest on the RETURN key.

A single line came back:

FEDDIES BLOCKING US. YOU'RE ON YOUR OWN. GOOD LUCK.

Gouf cursed. "Y'know, that plan about running like hell sounds pretty good right now."

[Typhonis 1]

hmmm rats the floor is carpeted . Wonder what the yokels running this crate are doing??

[Micheal Ryans, Beta pilot]

"Probably running their asses off to the nearest escape pods."

OOC: Iggie, my character wears an opaque visor. You wouldn't be able to tell whether or not he's raised an eyebrow.

[Typhonis 1]

Tyler hangs there as he is carried his mind working "where too now?? this ships engineering section? maybe a small craft hanger so we can blast the bastard into space?

[Kuja]

"Sounds like a good idea to me. Does that thing have and weapons besides the cannon? Cause I took that one out."

(Mike: post edited )

[Micheal Ryans, Beta pilot]

"Yeah. You get hit with that shield on its arm, and you won't be getting back up. I agree with the 'get the fuck out of here' plan. I've got a Slipstream-equipped Longsword fighter in the landing bay. If we move now we can make it!" (OOC:shameless Halo quote)

Mike ran like hell, hoping the bitches on this thing hadn't done anything to his ship.

[Kuja]

"Holy shit!" Gouf said as they reached Mike's fighter. Someone or something had really worked it over. Armor was scorched, wires had been cut loose, and the canopy was shattered. "Now what do we do?"

[Micheal Ryans, Beta pilot]

"Find the son-of-a-bitch that did it and give him a savage beating would be favourite."

Mike stalked away, shotgun out and loaded, ready to deliver some commissar-style justice.

[Typhonis 1]

" Hmmmm " Tyler hops down and runs over to a panel and opens it.


"time for some confusion" Zzzziiipppppp tinkletinkletinkletinkle

[Kuja]

"Well, I wouldn't trust any of the other shuttles around here with my life," Gouf grunted. "If that Hunter-thing smashed up your ship-" Then, he noticed Tyler hacking away at the wireing. "Hey, what're you doing?"

[Micheal Ryans, Beta pilot]

Mike found the person responsible, an irritating alien named Neelix.

His first action was to take out the little shits knees with one shell.

"Now, bitch, why the fuck did you mess up my fighter?"