Some critism wanted

AMP: sci-fi art, regular art, pictures, photos, comics, music, etc.

Moderator: Beowulf

Post Reply
User avatar
Lord Revan
Emperor's Hand
Posts: 12229
Joined: 2004-05-20 02:23pm
Location: Zone:classified

Some critism wanted

Post by Lord Revan »

this is a drawing I made (just to be clear I made this mostly to pass time between classes), but I'd like if you be willing to give your opinions and contructive critism for it.
Image
Oh and in case you're wondering I made this with a pencil.
I may be an idiot, but I'm a tolerated idiot
"I think you completely missed the point of sigs. They're supposed to be completely homegrown in the fertile hydroponics lab of your mind, dried in your closet, rolled, and smoked...
Oh wait, that's marijuana..."Einhander Sn0m4n
User avatar
LadyTevar
White Mage
White Mage
Posts: 23337
Joined: 2003-02-12 10:59pm

Re: Some critism wanted

Post by LadyTevar »

I am no artist, but I'll try.

At first look, the brick wall on the left doesn't look right to me. The brick wall doesn't seem to be drawn at the same angle/point of view as the rest of the picture. It's confusing, and while the right (solid) wall looks 3-d, the brick wall doesn't.

In the background, the clouds look nice, but there mountains are too fuzzy. They should have more detail, because they're closer than the clouds. Sharper lines, angular shadows to show ridge-lines and contours. Think Bob Ross painting his mountains.
Image
Nitram, slightly high on cough syrup: Do you know you're beautiful?
Me: Nope, that's why I have you around to tell me.
Nitram: You -are- beautiful. Anyone tries to tell you otherwise kill them.

"A life is like a garden. Perfect moments can be had, but not preserved, except in memory. LLAP" -- Leonard Nimoy, last Tweet
User avatar
Lord Revan
Emperor's Hand
Posts: 12229
Joined: 2004-05-20 02:23pm
Location: Zone:classified

Re: Some critism wanted

Post by Lord Revan »

Yeah I know the prespective is a bit of, getting that right can be an issue for me and currently trying to fix it, though I'm guessing I was too conserned at getting the broken parts look right to get prespective fixed.

though I can see what say about mountains.
I may be an idiot, but I'm a tolerated idiot
"I think you completely missed the point of sigs. They're supposed to be completely homegrown in the fertile hydroponics lab of your mind, dried in your closet, rolled, and smoked...
Oh wait, that's marijuana..."Einhander Sn0m4n
User avatar
Batman
Emperor's Hand
Posts: 16389
Joined: 2002-07-09 04:51am
Location: Seriously thinking about moving to Marvel because so much of the DCEU stinks

Re: Some critism wanted

Post by Batman »

Actually it looks fine to me. We don't know the 'camera angle' or how far from the scene it is. The mountains being diffuse works for me because guess what? The air isn't always clear.
'Next time I let Superman take charge, just hit me. Real hard.'
'You're a princess from a society of immortal warriors. I'm a rich kid with issues. Lots of issues.'
'No. No dating for the Batman. It might cut into your brooding time.'
'Tactically we have multiple objectives. So we need to split into teams.'-'Dibs on the Amazon!'
'Hey, we both have a Martian's phone number on our speed dial. I think I deserve the benefit of the doubt.'
'You know, for a guy with like 50 different kinds of vision, you sure are blind.'
User avatar
The_Saint
Jedi Knight
Posts: 798
Joined: 2007-05-05 04:13am
Location: Under Down Under

Re: Some critism wanted

Post by The_Saint »

I thought mountains vs clouds looked fine... as Batman said: the air isn't always clear and so at great distance you'd expect a bit of diffuse light around the edges...

I think the bit I find troubling with the wall angle/perspective its that it's vertically compressed relative to human field of view. The horizon line sorta suggests that it's level with the viewers eyeline but the angle of the walls at the bottom of the picture has them appear to almost be below the viewer.
All people are equal but some people are more equal than others.
User avatar
madd0ct0r
Sith Acolyte
Posts: 6259
Joined: 2008-03-14 07:47am

Re: Some critism wanted

Post by madd0ct0r »

the wall on the right casts a shadow but wall on left does not. The wall on left has blocks stacked in simple vertical shifts. Normally you'd expect a staggered brickwork pattern. The lines between the blocks on the face of the left wall are too straight/thin. Individually placed blocks would have a little more ripple to them. The lines on top of the wall are not following the perspective rules of the rest of the drawing.

The 'roof frame' beams on the right hand side are slanted correctly and with correct perspective. The angle they come in at means they'd be pushing down and sideays under gravity. There's no fastening, notching, ties or local wall thickening there, so the overall effect is that they are weightless.


the crack in the earth at the center is incorrect. The shape of the crack indicates the earth is shrinking, but if it was you'd expect a continuous pattern of it up to wards the camera, loosely based on a voroni distribution. (draw dots on very rough perspective grid or hexagon spacing, draw cracks along the lines of equal distance between two dots. Gives you patterns that look like https://www.deviantart.com/compasslogic ... -441462053 or (without perspective) http://www.clker.com/cliparts/f/9/c/0/1 ... th%201.jpg ) That applies for a consistent soil under roughly equal shrinkage (clay content drying in the sun)

Single cracks like you have shown might appear due to something happening underneath the surface, but for that reason they tend to be longer and deeper and normally show a slight relative vertical movement: https://phys.org/news/2016-02-mysteriou ... op-up.html
"Aid, trade, green technology and peace." - Hans Rosling.
"Welcome to SDN, where we can't see the forest because walking into trees repeatedly feels good, bro." - Mr Coffee
User avatar
TimothyC
Of Sector 2814
Posts: 3793
Joined: 2005-03-23 05:31pm

Re: Some critism wanted

Post by TimothyC »

I'm not all that good at hand shading myself, but on the wall, and in the shadow of the wall, you shaded in the edge win a different direction than most of the shading, which looks a bit off? It might have just stuck out because the rest had a uniform stroke direction.
"I believe in the future. It is wonderful because it stands on what has been achieved." - Sergei Korolev
Post Reply