FUCK!!!
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FUCK!!!
Imagine for a moment that you just found out you may have a short time to live. That pain inside you wasnt just your imagination but something real. You suspected it but casted it aside as another paranioa. Several years ago you were put on medication. Since then the dosage has been doubled twise and the pills get bigger and bigger. Yet each time your lab report comes in the numbers keep getting worse and worse. You're not scared but you don't know what to do now. What would you do? Who would you tell? Would you pray for a mircale? Would you seek redemption? Would you live out your dreams? Would you cry? Or would you smile and do nothing?
That would be the infamous Peter's away message. He's an 18 year old diabetic. And one of my "brothers" (for those of you that don't understand, it's a surrogate family-by choice type thing). My day has gone to shit.
That would be the infamous Peter's away message. He's an 18 year old diabetic. And one of my "brothers" (for those of you that don't understand, it's a surrogate family-by choice type thing). My day has gone to shit.
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What type of diabeties is it?
It is posible to live with it, but requires very tight control if it is the worse variety(Insulin dependent diabeties) .
My father is an insulin dependent diabetic, and I have an elevated risk of developing it.
It is posible to live with it, but requires very tight control if it is the worse variety(Insulin dependent diabeties) .
My father is an insulin dependent diabetic, and I have an elevated risk of developing it.
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That honestly suck.
I hope Peter does get well in some way...and best of luck.
I hope Peter does get well in some way...and best of luck.
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He's got insulin-dependent diabetes. I'm just scared that one day before we ever get to meet, he'll not be there. We've known each other as long as I've been on the board, and he's grown to be one of my closest friends.. hell, he has even been one to stel my heart for a time. He's really, really close to me. Although we talked some last night, I still am agitated a bit by it. It makes me nervous to know someone, and have them be that close, and then to know that they might be gone sometime.
And now I think I know the answer to one of my dreams.. and it hurts. A lot.
And now I think I know the answer to one of my dreams.. and it hurts. A lot.
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Unfortunately, in my experience dreams can sometimes be more than dreams. Verilon, I feel for you. Although my situation is way different than yours, I understand your pain of knowing that you care for someone so intensely and feel them slipping away. You want to make the most of your time, but there is a distance, be it palpable or otherwise, that keeps you from being able to. I'm going through that myself, so I know your pain all to well.verilon wrote:He's got insulin-dependent diabetes. I'm just scared that one day before we ever get to meet, he'll not be there. We've known each other as long as I've been on the board, and he's grown to be one of my closest friends.. hell, he has even been one to stel my heart for a time. He's really, really close to me. Although we talked some last night, I still am agitated a bit by it. It makes me nervous to know someone, and have them be that close, and then to know that they might be gone sometime.
And now I think I know the answer to one of my dreams.. and it hurts. A lot.
If I could offer my suggestion...enjoy whatever time there is left, and don't let that fall away. Because if it does go, you may never be able to get it back again.
"And as I promised, I said I would read from the bible..." "...And if we could turn our bible to Pslams..."Happy shall he be that taketh and dasheth thy little ones against the stones." (Pslams 137:9) So let me ask you a question? Who is the worst influence, God or Marilyn Manson?" "God!" "And if that's not the best fucking example, God HIMSELF killed his own MOTHER FUCKING SON!"-Marilyn Manson
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Achieved ultimate Doom (post 666) on Mon Aug 18, 2003 10:38 pm
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Achieved ultimate Doom (post 666) on Mon Aug 18, 2003 10:38 pm
...
[hugs]
....
There's really nothing I can say, sorry, Ver.
[hugs]
....
There's really nothing I can say, sorry, Ver.
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First off, thank you for your support. As for the dreams, many a time, my dreams are more than dreams. And that is why it hurts so much.Lord_Xerxes wrote:Unfortunately, in my experience dreams can sometimes be more than dreams. Verilon, I feel for you. Although my situation is way different than yours, I understand your pain of knowing that you care for someone so intensely and feel them slipping away. You want to make the most of your time, but there is a distance, be it palpable or otherwise, that keeps you from being able to. I'm going through that myself, so I know your pain all to well.verilon wrote:He's got insulin-dependent diabetes. I'm just scared that one day before we ever get to meet, he'll not be there. We've known each other as long as I've been on the board, and he's grown to be one of my closest friends.. hell, he has even been one to stel my heart for a time. He's really, really close to me. Although we talked some last night, I still am agitated a bit by it. It makes me nervous to know someone, and have them be that close, and then to know that they might be gone sometime.
And now I think I know the answer to one of my dreams.. and it hurts. A lot.
If I could offer my suggestion...enjoy whatever time there is left, and don't let that fall away. Because if it does go, you may never be able to get it back again.
I want to try to make the best time that we can, but it's right now the fact that he's in California and I'm in New Mexico. We've never met IRL, but we've known each other for almost seven months, now. Our relationship with each other, our bond, has grown stronger with each passing day. If anything should happen to him, the one thing I want to have happen before that is to meet him. And to give him his one wish ~ to cuddle. [sighs] It's funny to think that we've already made some plans for when we do meet up, lol. And to know that something will tear him from me before anyone should.. that hurts more than anything.
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Hey, it's all good. There's really not much *to* say. =/innerbrat wrote:...
[hugs]
....
There's really nothing I can say, sorry, Ver.
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Anytime, ver, Anytime. I know what you're saying about the dreams being more...I've had that experience a lot. I just hope you get through this thing intact. I know how hard this can be. In my situation, the person I want to be with is right infront of me, and close by, but I cannot have her. And that's killing me. So you might say, I'm walking down a very similiar road to the one you are.verilon wrote:First off, thank you for your support. As for the dreams, many a time, my dreams are more than dreams. And that is why it hurts so much.Lord_Xerxes wrote:Unfortunately, in my experience dreams can sometimes be more than dreams. Verilon, I feel for you. Although my situation is way different than yours, I understand your pain of knowing that you care for someone so intensely and feel them slipping away. You want to make the most of your time, but there is a distance, be it palpable or otherwise, that keeps you from being able to. I'm going through that myself, so I know your pain all to well.verilon wrote:He's got insulin-dependent diabetes. I'm just scared that one day before we ever get to meet, he'll not be there. We've known each other as long as I've been on the board, and he's grown to be one of my closest friends.. hell, he has even been one to stel my heart for a time. He's really, really close to me. Although we talked some last night, I still am agitated a bit by it. It makes me nervous to know someone, and have them be that close, and then to know that they might be gone sometime.
And now I think I know the answer to one of my dreams.. and it hurts. A lot.
If I could offer my suggestion...enjoy whatever time there is left, and don't let that fall away. Because if it does go, you may never be able to get it back again.
I want to try to make the best time that we can, but it's right now the fact that he's in California and I'm in New Mexico. We've never met IRL, but we've known each other for almost seven months, now. Our relationship with each other, our bond, has grown stronger with each passing day. If anything should happen to him, the one thing I want to have happen before that is to meet him. And to give him his one wish ~ to cuddle. [sighs] It's funny to think that we've already made some plans for when we do meet up, lol. And to know that something will tear him from me before anyone should.. that hurts more than anything.
Make your plans, and try to carry them through. If you don't follow through with them, even if they seem fleeting in the face of everything, you will regret it. Trust me.
"And as I promised, I said I would read from the bible..." "...And if we could turn our bible to Pslams..."Happy shall he be that taketh and dasheth thy little ones against the stones." (Pslams 137:9) So let me ask you a question? Who is the worst influence, God or Marilyn Manson?" "God!" "And if that's not the best fucking example, God HIMSELF killed his own MOTHER FUCKING SON!"-Marilyn Manson
"Don't fuck with a Jedi Master, son..." -M.H in J.A.S.B.S.B
Achieved ultimate Doom (post 666) on Mon Aug 18, 2003 10:38 pm
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Achieved ultimate Doom (post 666) on Mon Aug 18, 2003 10:38 pm
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PM me about the dream thing.. I'd like to talk with you more about that..Lord_Xerxes wrote:Anytime, ver, Anytime. I know what you're saying about the dreams being more...I've had that experience a lot. I just hope you get through this thing intact. I know how hard this can be. In my situation, the person I want to be with is right infront of me, and close by, but I cannot have her. And that's killing me. So you might say, I'm walking down a very similiar road to the one you are.
Trust me, I'm doing all I can to pull through with them.. it's just a matter of getting a job (which is near impossible to do here). I just don't want him to be gone before I ever get a chance to meet him. And I know it won't happen that I won't meet him.. it's just a fear..Make your plans, and try to carry them through. If you don't follow through with them, even if they seem fleeting in the face of everything, you will regret it. Trust me.
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PM me about the dream thing.. I'd like to talk with you more about that..verilon wrote:Lord_Xerxes wrote:Anytime, ver, Anytime. I know what you're saying about the dreams being more...I've had that experience a lot. I just hope you get through this thing intact. I know how hard this can be. In my situation, the person I want to be with is right infront of me, and close by, but I cannot have her. And that's killing me. So you might say, I'm walking down a very similiar road to the one you are.
Do you have AIM, ver? AsheCole666
Drop me an IM if you do. Easier that way.
I definetly understand your fears. I'm living them day to day.
"And as I promised, I said I would read from the bible..." "...And if we could turn our bible to Pslams..."Happy shall he be that taketh and dasheth thy little ones against the stones." (Pslams 137:9) So let me ask you a question? Who is the worst influence, God or Marilyn Manson?" "God!" "And if that's not the best fucking example, God HIMSELF killed his own MOTHER FUCKING SON!"-Marilyn Manson
"Don't fuck with a Jedi Master, son..." -M.H in J.A.S.B.S.B
Achieved ultimate Doom (post 666) on Mon Aug 18, 2003 10:38 pm
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Achieved ultimate Doom (post 666) on Mon Aug 18, 2003 10:38 pm
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Dunno if he's tried that. But I do know that he's on a kidney pump. =/Kreshna Aryaguna Nurzaman wrote:How about alternative medicine, ver? I heard certain types of herbs can help diabetes patient to some extent.
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I'm insulin dependant/type 1 myself, and kidney failure scares the piss out of me. A friend of mine whose kidneys failed said he was the only non-diabetic in dialysis(s/p?).verilon wrote:Dunno if he's tried that. But I do know that he's on a kidney pump. =/Kreshna Aryaguna Nurzaman wrote:How about alternative medicine, ver? I heard certain types of herbs can help diabetes patient to some extent.
Herbal remedies wouldn't be much help at this stage of the game.
Life is all the eternity you get, use it wisely.
Whatever you do, don't let him start spending tens of thousands on Mexican Clinics. There's a reaosn that kind of thing is illegal in the US, y'know.Kreshna Aryaguna Nurzaman wrote:How about alternative medicine, ver? I heard certain types of herbs can help diabetes patient to some extent.
Personally, I do think a lot of 'alternative mediciines' are placebos at best. Make sure he knows what he's putting inot his body.
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