What is this? Shep thinks he's hijacking the VRWC? Mobilize the 1st and 2nd Goldwater Corps immediately! Dissent cannot be tolerated! Find the hippie sympathyzer and shoot him down like a dog!
Any city gets what it admires, will pay for, and, ultimately, deserves…We want and deserve tin-can architecture in a tinhorn culture. And we will probably be judged not by the monuments we build but by those we have destroyed.--Ada Louise Huxtable, "Farewell to Penn Station", New York Times editorial, 30 October 1963 X-Ray Blues
RedImperator wrote:What is this? Shep thinks he's hijacking the VRWC? Mobilize the 1st and 2nd Goldwater Corps immediately! Dissent cannot be tolerated! Find the hippie sympathyzer and shoot him down like a dog!
Wha?
WTF?
You dare speak to the Grand Wizard of the Ku Klux Klan in America
that way?
I've done more for the vast right-wing conspiracy than you young
whippersnappers! All you do is sit around and drink the blood of
welfare mothers...my goons have kept the white man on top
for nearly a century, even before you were a gleam in your
daddy's eye!
"If scientists and inventors who develop disease cures and useful technologies don't get lifetime royalties, I'd like to know what fucking rationale you have for some guy getting lifetime royalties for writing an episode of Full House." - Mike Wong
"The present air situation in the Pacific is entirely the result of fighting a fifth rate air power." - U.S. Navy Memo - 24 July 1944
Vast, Secret Right Wing Conspiracy Siezes Control "Of Course This Means We're No Longer 'Secret'" Says Leader
Stadtsgradburg, AP Wire-- Control of the government was siezed today by a vast, secret right-wing conspiracy, said conspiracy leader MK Sheppard at a formal press briefing within the Cheyenne Mountain Facility of NORAD, in Colorado.
"We control the armed forces, the militant groups, and the economy," Sheppard confirmed, "we control the horizontal. We control the vertical, too. Do not attempt to adjust your television."
All over the country, right-wingers celebrated their secret, conspiratorical victory by burning copies of the book "Iron John" and drawing funky handlebar mustaches on pictures of syndicated liberal columnist Molly Ivens.
"I've waited for this day for all of my life," said NRA member Phil McCracken, choking back sobs of joyous emotion, "I can now proudly drive my SUV to WalMart and get a new color TV for my trailer. I also got a new gun for my wife," he said, a smile beaming across his face, "Best trade I ever made."
All over, Bloods, Crips, the KKK and the Black Panthers lined up to receive wads of cash from Jewish bankers wearing "Kahane was Right" t-shirts. Each wad of cash was dipped in blood before being distributed. "It gives the cash such a crisp, new feel when it dries," explained Coyote Shyster, "Hey, would you like a 'Property of the Illuminati' T-shirt? They're two for the price of one in the Gift Shop."
When asked about his future plans for the Democratic Party-- much of which had been rounded up and placd in camps in Waco, Texas-- Sheppard just cackled evilly from beneath the cowl of his black robe. A strongman, rumored to be the renegade criminal ninja known only as "Sea Skimmer", then pushed reporters back. "No more questions," he ordered.
Hippie leaders were asked for comment, but only one spokesman could be found in the dizzying haze of marijuana smoke. The stoned and jobless drifter, known only by the inistials Q.S., when asked his opinion on the vast right-wing takeover, had only the following quote--
"Whooaah, dude. Check it out. That tree is humping an elephant."
Something about Libertarianism always bothered me. Then one day, I realized what it was:
Libertarian philosophy can be boiled down to the phrase, "Work Will Make You Free."
In Libertarianism, there is no Government, so the Bosses are free to exploit the Workers.
In Communism, there is no Government, so the Workers are free to exploit the Bosses.
So in Libertarianism, man exploits man, but in Communism, its the other way around! If all you want to do is have some harmless, mindless fun, go H3RE INST3ADZ0RZ!! Grrr! Fight my Brute, you pansy!
"If scientists and inventors who develop disease cures and useful technologies don't get lifetime royalties, I'd like to know what fucking rationale you have for some guy getting lifetime royalties for writing an episode of Full House." - Mike Wong
"The present air situation in the Pacific is entirely the result of fighting a fifth rate air power." - U.S. Navy Memo - 24 July 1944
I am, disturbed, at your lack of notice of the one who controls the vast VRWC nuclear supply and military.
*calls Skimmer: Yes, we have a dissident who refuses to acknowledge the great VRWC Air Force. Would you like to drag him to a re-education camp or would you like me to simply do away with him with a tac-nuke?*
*snaps a poor social security-receiving senior's neck and drinks the vitae from its still-twitching form*
BoTM / JL / MM / HAB / VRWC / Horseman
I'm studying for the CPA exam. Have a nice summer, and if you're down just sit back and realize that Joe is off somewhere, doing much worse than you are.
Nathan F wrote:I am, disturbed, at your lack of notice of the one who controls the vast VRWC nuclear supply and military.
*calls Skimmer: Yes, we have a dissident who refuses to acknowledge the great VRWC Air Force. Would you like to drag him to a re-education camp or would you like me to simply do away with him with a tac-nuke?*
*Guards and operators of the nuclear missle silos and tactical bomb storage depots reveal the the colored triangle of the Amerikan Amored Corps. Those guard and operators loyal to Mr. "F" are swiftly dealt with.
Sheppard: we have VRWC Nuklar Control, over and out to all Y'all.
Formerly the artist known as Captain Lennox
"To myself I am only a child playing on the beach, while vast oceans of truth lie undiscovered before me." - Sir Isaac Newton
Nathan F wrote:I am, disturbed, at your lack of notice of the one who controls the vast VRWC nuclear supply and military.
*calls Skimmer: Yes, we have a dissident who refuses to acknowledge the great VRWC Air Force. Would you like to drag him to a re-education camp or would you like me to simply do away with him with a tac-nuke?*
*Guards and operators of the nuclear missle silos and tactical bomb storage depots reveal the the colored triangle of the Amerikan Amored Corps. Those guard and operators loyal to Mr. "F" are swiftly dealt with.
Sheppard: we have VRWC Nuklar Control, over and out to all Y'all.
You have misunderstood me, my good Captain. I am fighting in support of the VRWC, not against, for the good of us all. I consider the good Shep a comrade in arms, not only in the glorious HAB, but also in the righteous VRWC.
Nathan F wrote:I am, disturbed, at your lack of notice of the one who controls the vast VRWC nuclear supply and military.
*calls Skimmer: Yes, we have a dissident who refuses to acknowledge the great VRWC Air Force. Would you like to drag him to a re-education camp or would you like me to simply do away with him with a tac-nuke?*
*Guards and operators of the nuclear missle silos and tactical bomb storage depots reveal the the colored triangle of the Amerikan Amored Corps. Those guard and operators loyal to Mr. "F" are swiftly dealt with.
Sheppard: we have VRWC Nuklar Control, over and out to all Y'all.
You have misunderstood me, my good Captain. I am fighting in support of the VRWC, not against, for the good of us all. I consider the good Shep a comrade in arms, not only in the glorious HAB, but also in the righteous VRWC.
Yeh, sure I knew that. *Walks away with a gun pointed at his head* Yeaaah
Formerly the artist known as Captain Lennox
"To myself I am only a child playing on the beach, while vast oceans of truth lie undiscovered before me." - Sir Isaac Newton
Ya'll might have the guns, beer, pr0n and tanks and aer-o-planes, but I have the nuclear launch codes! Slipped off with the Football while Shep was launching his silly coup!
You might have the nukes, but they ain't launchin' without ME
You might have the nukes, but they ain't launchin' without ME
No matter. Our slicers will reprogram the codes.
Then your failure will be complete.
"You say that it is your custom to burn widows. Very well. We also have a custom: when men burn a woman alive, we tie a rope around their necks and we hang them. Build your funeral pyre; beside it, my carpenters will build a gallows. You may follow your custom. And then we will follow ours."- General Sir Charles Napier
You have fallen for the bait. Those codes are self destruct codes for the two nuclear warheads that are attached to the vehicle you are currently riding in.
Fellow Right Wingers, the dissident has been dealt with.
We may now continue on our campaign of right-wing conservatism through the ranks of the evil liberal hippies!
weemadando wrote:As thread author can I request that the hijack be dealt with leaving this thread for sarcastic news articles, what ever their bent may be?
21 Megaton Explosion Devastates Tasmania
Today, in a strange twist, a 21 megaton thermonuclear explosion ripped
through the island of Tasmania, killing all wildlife, and strangely enough,
there was only one casualty: Anders Russel.
Rumor from the United States says that Führer Sheppard accidentially
sneezed and hit the Button while playing with the briefcase...
"If scientists and inventors who develop disease cures and useful technologies don't get lifetime royalties, I'd like to know what fucking rationale you have for some guy getting lifetime royalties for writing an episode of Full House." - Mike Wong
"The present air situation in the Pacific is entirely the result of fighting a fifth rate air power." - U.S. Navy Memo - 24 July 1944
weemadando wrote:As thread author can I request that the hijack be dealt with leaving this thread for sarcastic news articles, what ever their bent may be?
We at SD.Net are sorry for this thread Hijack, please hand over your valubles and any cash you may be carrying and normal service will be restored as soon as possible. Thank you for your cooperation.
Via money Europe could become political in five years" "... the current communities should be completed by a Finance Common Market which would lead us to European economic unity. Only then would ... the mutual commitments make it fairly easy to produce the political union which is the goal"
weemadando wrote:As thread author can I request that the hijack be dealt with leaving this thread for sarcastic news articles, what ever their bent may be?
We at SD.Net are sorry for this thread Hijack, please hand over your valubles and any cash you may be carrying and normal service will be restored as soon as possible. Thank you for your cooperation.
Of course, any funds taken in will be distributed to the VRCW war efforts, and your donation is also tax deductable.
Andrew J. wrote:Damn! When right-wingers and left-wingers fight they always leave a huge fucking mess, and do you know who has to clean it up? Moderates, that's who!
The power of the middle compels you!
No, it doesn't. The Great Leader has exiled you to a camp for politikal prisoners.
Formerly the artist known as Captain Lennox
"To myself I am only a child playing on the beach, while vast oceans of truth lie undiscovered before me." - Sir Isaac Newton
Andrew J. wrote:Damn! When right-wingers and left-wingers fight they always leave a huge fucking mess, and do you know who has to clean it up? Moderates, that's who!
The power of the middle compels you!
Mess? There will be no 'mess' when the VRWC takes on the pothead hippie liberals! Their rotten fruit can do no harm to our nuclear power and armored divisions. The only mess will be scraping their thrown fruit from the paint of our armor after we have leveled all resistance.