Children and sex

[Shrykull]

When should you teach your kids about it? Anyone here ever been real liberal and taught them the truth right from the beginning, I know a woman who did. Kids can understand masturbation, a lot of them even do it, but not, I guess, being attracted to the opposite sex yet.

[jegs2]

When should you teach your kids about it? Anyone here ever been real liberal and taught them the truth right from the beginning, I know a woman who did. Kids can understand masturbation, a lot of them even do it, but not, I guess, being attracted to the opposite sex yet.

My parents told my sister and me of the mechanics of sexual intercourse when we were about nine and 10 respectively. Of course, that was in the late 70's, and things have changed considerably since then, so I'd recommend the same for children of seven or eight. Otherwise, they'll hear of it from their classmates in school beforehand.

[Exonerate]

When should you teach your kids about it? Anyone here ever been real liberal and taught them the truth right from the beginning, I know a woman who did. Kids can understand masturbation, a lot of them even do it, but not, I guess, being attracted to the opposite sex yet.

My parents told my sister and me of the mechanics of sexual intercourse when we were about nine and 10 respectively. Of course, that was in the late 70's, and things have changed considerably since then, so I'd recommend the same for children of seven or eight. Otherwise, they'll hear of it from their classmates in school beforehand.

Seconded. I first heard about it in second grade, about a guy who talked about once he turned on the TV and saw a guy and woman having sex... At the time, we just thought "Huh? That's weird."

Of course, my parents never discussed it, so I learned most of it from school (Both classes and friends)

[Sriad]

When should you teach your kids about it? Anyone here ever been real liberal and taught them the truth right from the beginning, I know a woman who did. Kids can understand masturbation, a lot of them even do it, but not, I guess, being attracted to the opposite sex yet.

In the event that I ever spawn young, I plan to teach them about sex the same way my parents taught me; buy the curious youngsters a bunch of science-y books including a few about human biology. With big pictures, because kids love pictures.

[kojikun]

Give your kid a playboy or two and a playgirl or two. neither of them have actual sex, so its just a slight bit more revealing then da Vinci or Michelangelo. That along with the sciency stuff and the kids will know exactly whats what.

[Trytostaydead]

I learned around 8 or 9 I believe.. I forget.

[Sokar]

When should you teach your kids about it? Anyone here ever been real liberal and taught them the truth right from the beginning, I know a woman who did. Kids can understand masturbation, a lot of them even do it, but not, I guess, being attracted to the opposite sex yet.

Well , I don't yet have young, but from my own childhood I can say that the best time to teach them about it is when they start to ask questions, or engage in sexual behaiviors in potentially innapropriate times or places.
My own parents were always very open about sexuality, when I discovered that rubbing my wee pecker felt good they explained that it was fine to do and do as often as I cared to , as long as I wasn't doing it in public. Mind you it wasn't couched as being shameful, but something that was personal , special and done in private , or with others who were special to you. Sexual pleasure was something to be enjoyed rather than feel bad about. I always felt bad for many of my school mates as they would regale stories of being caught and punished, often severly, for any hint of sexual expression. I've long felt that I have a healthy sexual attitude free of true hangups, oddball fetishes or compulsions(the ones I do have I know the why and wherefor of them )

Best advice I can give -
1. Answer questions truthfully, but don't give more information than is necessary for a given age, or use terms that are too advanced.

2. Never make it into a shameful act, sexual pleasure is onr of the cornerstones seperating humanity from the lesser beasts of nature and to make something so wonderful into an act of shame or fear is a travesty.


Oh, glad you liked that quote Shrykull, I feel special now

[Sokar]

Give your kid a playboy or two and a playgirl or two. neither of them have actual sex, so its just a slight bit more revealing then da Vinci or Michelangelo. That along with the sciency stuff and the kids will know exactly whats what.

Awful idea there kojikun, the images and ideas conveyed in your average Playboy or Playgirl offers up only idealized and HIGHLY styalized sexual images that have little or nothing to do with the real world of human intamacy.

[Sebastin]

I agree with Sokar here. Kids can understand very well that sex is something perfectly normal and they should be told about it as soon they get courious about it.

My parents told me about sex when I was 6 or 7 years old and by age ten I technicaly already had sex with two different girls. I say technicaly because I don´t count it as my first since neither of us really understood the significance of it and it had nothing to do with emotions. More like a secret play reserved for really good friends. But fun.

[Sokar]

My parents told me about sex when I was 6 or 7 years old and by age ten I technicaly already had sex with two different girls. I say technicaly because I don´t count it as my first since neither of us really understood the significance of it and it had nothing to do with emotions. More like a secret play reserved for really good friends. But fun.

I too experimented fairly early, my parents had a number of neo-hippy friends , including a woman and her daughter who was about 6mons younger than me, we just did normal kid stuff 90% of the time but we sex played fairly often as well. Neiether of us thought it wrong, it sure as hell felt good, and her mother was cool with it. Later she told me , onece we were older, that she'd nearly interrupted us a couple of times , but knew there was on harm being done as we were both good friends and equaly willing and eager.

I really think that we as a society are hampered in the worst way by the legacy of the Victorian and Puritanical roots of much of our culture. People's lives are easily and horrifically crippled due to sexual trauma or stigma and otherwise productive individuals are often ruined because they have all the perfectly natural human urges, but have been taught that thoes very same urges are bad, evil , sinful , pick your perjoative, so thwey are caught in a vicious Catch-22. IMHO we should all just relax, sex(hetero, homo or bi, its all good in my book) should be seen as a normal thing , as natural as eating and breathing, if we could do this I really think we could effect a socital change for the better.

[Sir Sirius]

I think I was ten when I asked my mother about sex, I knew something about the subject before that, but this was the first time I actualy brought the subject up with my parents. She explained the whole thing (including intercourse, prophylactics, homosexuality, pregnancy, birth and STDs) just as thoroughly as an MD can.

The lecture lasted for a couple of hours and I didn't really understand half of what she said, but I knew more about the subject after that then any of my friends, including a whole lot of Latin terms.

Mom later (like ten years later) told me that she had sort of panicked when I brought the subject up and that she had resorted to her medical training as a kind of a refuge. She said that she had later regretted going in to that much detail, but I don't think that she did any harm in doing so, I had much fun that year telling my friends what I had learned.

[InnerBrat]

My mother was always a little embarrassed by the subject, so I nevr really had the talk - there was a 'you know how to put a tampon in, right?' tal;k at 14, which lasted all of 5 minutes.
Then at 16, she fousn a condom in my bag, and asked me if I needed advice, to which I said no.

She knew I was intelligent, sensible, and well read, so she trusted me to pick it up.

[Queeb Salaron]

Teach the kids when they start washing their own bedsheets to avoid the embarassment that follows wet dreams, or when she starts talking about boys. ::Shrugs:: I figure that's as good a time as any.

[Einhander Sn0m4n]

Give your kid a playboy or two and a playgirl or two. neither of them have actual sex, so its just a slight bit more revealing then da Vinci or Michelangelo. That along with the sciency stuff and the kids will know exactly whats what.

Awful idea there kojikun, the images and ideas conveyed in your average Playboy or Playgirl offers up only idealized and HIGHLY styalized sexual images that have little or nothing to do with the real world of human intamacy.

Agreed, Sokar. Bad call Koji...

[kojikun]

ok, maybe no playboy, amateur porn, then its REALISTIC.

who wants to donate to the collection? >D

[Gandalf]

I was tought all the basics at the age of 7.

[Einhander Sn0m4n]

ok, maybe no playboy, amateur porn, then its REALISTIC.

who wants to donate to the collection? >D

Dood, Look what you are saying: YOU ARE ADVOCATING SHOWING PORN TO UNDERAGE CHILDREN!!!

[Spanky The Dolphin]

Kojikun doesn't know how to interact with children, let alone people his own age.

He might think it's funny, but it just shows that he truly has no idea how to communicate with others.

Just ignore him.

[Einhander Sn0m4n]

Kojikun doesn't know how to interact with children, let alone people his own age.

Just ignore him.

Ah ok... I reported him to a Supermod anyway. Sorry to burden you with this shit, Dalton, but I've had it. Good night, peepz, I'm goin ta bed...

[Dalton]

Koji, you know better than to tweak Ein and Spanky.

[Stormbringer]

No more crap out of anyone you hear me?

[SyntaxVorlon]

As said above, the appropriate age is roughly 7-8.
Children at this age are going to be adults in a scant decade, they will be legal adults, 5 years before that they will be biological adults. The goal is to have them become mature adults between when they become biologically and legally so.
While you're at it, try and teach them another language, they're at the age when they'll be most receptive to it, and it'll help them in countless ways further down the road.

[Einhander Sn0m4n]

No more crap out of anyone you hear me?

Roger that, Red Leader.

[kojikun]

showing a child a picture of a nude person is no different then showing a child a picture of Michelangelo's David, only the guy in the picture might have a hardon. I'm not sure why you make the distinction, we've had 50 million "porn vs art" threads and everyones pretty much agreed that the difference is in your mind.

So how is David any less vulger then a photograph, besides real-vs-marble?

*edit*

I'm going to add to this real quick.

Mike is showing his little kid BLACK HAWK DOWN, with DEATH and VIOLENCE, so that his kid knows about real war and fighting , and you applaud, and yet youre saying that its fucked up to show two people having sex, one of the most fun and pleasurable activities ever.

I'm sorry, when did death and violence become less DAMAGING then fun and pleasure?

[XaLEv]

They may be referring to legal issues rather than moral ones here, koji.