Who would you elect god

SLAM: debunk creationism, pseudoscience, and superstitions. Discuss logic and morality.

Moderator: Alyrium Denryle

Asst. Asst. Lt. Cmdr. Smi
What Kind of Username is That?
Posts: 9254
Joined: 2002-07-10 08:53pm
Location: Back in PA

Post by Asst. Asst. Lt. Cmdr. Smi »

Me, of course. I say that because I'll do anything for tax-exempt status and the tithing of the gullible masses. Either that or the genitals of the opposite sex, since a good number of people worship them already.
BotM: Just another monkey|HAB
User avatar
Queeb Salaron
Jedi Council Member
Posts: 2337
Joined: 2003-03-12 12:45am
Location: Left of center.

Post by Queeb Salaron »

I got you all beat.

Bill Cosby for God.
Proud owner of The Fleshlight
G.A.L.E. Force - Bisexual Airborn Division
SDnet Resident Psycho Clown

"I hear and behold God in every object, yet I understand God not in the least, / Nor do I understand who there can be more wonderful than myself."
--Whitman

Fucking Funny.
User avatar
Admiral Johnason
Sith Devotee
Posts: 2552
Joined: 2003-01-11 05:06pm
Location: The Rebel cruiser Defender

Post by Admiral Johnason »

Me and then my friend Curtis for Vice God. Darth Wong can head up the angels.
Liberals for Nixon in 3000: Nixon... with carisma and a shiny robot body.

never negoiate out of fear, but never fear to negoiate.

Captian America- Justice League

HAB submarine commander-
"We'll break you of your fear of water."
User avatar
Alyrium Denryle
Minister of Sin
Posts: 22224
Joined: 2002-07-11 08:34pm
Location: The Deep Desert
Contact:

Post by Alyrium Denryle »

As Mnister of Sin. I move to nominate Durandal for the position of God.
GALE Force Biological Agent/
BOTM/Great Dolphin Conspiracy/
Entomology and Evolutionary Biology Subdirector:SD.net Dept. of Biological Sciences


There is Grandeur in the View of Life; it fills me with a Deep Wonder, and Intense Cynicism.

Factio republicanum delenda est
User avatar
Wicked Pilot
Moderator Emeritus
Posts: 8972
Joined: 2002-07-05 05:45pm

Post by Wicked Pilot »

Image

This Guy
The most basic assumption about the world is that it does not contradict itself.
User avatar
Darth Wong
Sith Lord
Sith Lord
Posts: 70028
Joined: 2002-07-03 12:25am
Location: Toronto, Canada
Contact:

Post by Darth Wong »

Alyrium Denryle wrote:As Mnister of Sin. I move to nominate Durandal for the position of God.
You already worship him, and for highly non-religious reasons :)
Image
"It's not evil for God to do it. Or for someone to do it at God's command."- Jonathan Boyd on baby-killing

"you guys are fascinated with the use of those "rules of logic" to the extent that you don't really want to discussus anything."- GC

"I do not believe Russian Roulette is a stupid act" - Embracer of Darkness

"Viagra commercials appear to save lives" - tharkûn on US health care.

http://www.stardestroyer.net/Mike/RantMode/Blurbs.html
User avatar
Alyrium Denryle
Minister of Sin
Posts: 22224
Joined: 2002-07-11 08:34pm
Location: The Deep Desert
Contact:

Post by Alyrium Denryle »

shut up! *paranoid glance* *whispers*They are not supposed to know that
Last edited by Alyrium Denryle on 2003-04-27 10:16pm, edited 1 time in total.
GALE Force Biological Agent/
BOTM/Great Dolphin Conspiracy/
Entomology and Evolutionary Biology Subdirector:SD.net Dept. of Biological Sciences


There is Grandeur in the View of Life; it fills me with a Deep Wonder, and Intense Cynicism.

Factio republicanum delenda est
User avatar
Frank Hipper
Overfiend of the Superego
Posts: 12882
Joined: 2002-10-17 08:48am
Location: Hamilton, Ohio?

Post by Frank Hipper »

Queeb Salaron wrote:I got you all beat.

Bill Cosby for God.
HAH! Like I'm not an atheist already!
Image
Life is all the eternity you get, use it wisely.
User avatar
pellaeons_scion
Jedi Knight
Posts: 601
Joined: 2002-09-25 10:07pm
Location: one shoebox among a whole host of shoeboxes

Post by pellaeons_scion »

Im voting for the mold in the bottom of my Coffee mug...

It is wise and all knowing...and moves in mysterious ways sometimes. And truly doesnt give a shit about humanity.

Amply qualified for the position of God :D
If apathy could be converted to energy, Australia would have an Unlimited power source.
User avatar
Hamel
Sith Marauder
Posts: 3842
Joined: 2003-02-06 10:34am
Contact:

Post by Hamel »

Queeb Salaron wrote:I got you all beat.

Bill Cosby for God.
Har har har *points to avatar*

Elect mah cawk for vice-gawd
"Right now we can tell you a report was filed by the family of a 12 year old boy yesterday afternoon alleging Mr. Michael Jackson of criminal activity. A search warrant has been filed and that search is currently taking place. Mr. Jackson has not been charged with any crime. We cannot specifically address the content of the police report as it is confidential information at the present time, however, we can confirm that Mr. Jackson forced the boy to listen to the Howard Stern show and watch the movie Private Parts over and over again."
User avatar
Alyrium Denryle
Minister of Sin
Posts: 22224
Joined: 2002-07-11 08:34pm
Location: The Deep Desert
Contact:

Post by Alyrium Denryle »

though i Would prefer Durandal for godhood, I find it insulting that no one has nominated me yet.
GALE Force Biological Agent/
BOTM/Great Dolphin Conspiracy/
Entomology and Evolutionary Biology Subdirector:SD.net Dept. of Biological Sciences


There is Grandeur in the View of Life; it fills me with a Deep Wonder, and Intense Cynicism.

Factio republicanum delenda est
Rathark
Padawan Learner
Posts: 476
Joined: 2002-07-10 11:43pm
Location: Not here.

Post by Rathark »

Straha wrote:And where is this invisible dragon?
<-------!!!!!!!!
User avatar
Sea Skimmer
Yankee Capitalist Air Pirate
Posts: 37390
Joined: 2002-07-03 11:49pm
Location: Passchendaele City, HAB

Post by Sea Skimmer »

You're all crazy. Anything living could have all sorts of insane ideas and plans in its head. I'm voting in favor of a moderate sized polished iron ball.
"This cult of special forces is as sensible as to form a Royal Corps of Tree Climbers and say that no soldier who does not wear its green hat with a bunch of oak leaves stuck in it should be expected to climb a tree"
— Field Marshal William Slim 1956
Johonebesus
Jedi Master
Posts: 1487
Joined: 2002-07-06 11:26pm

Post by Johonebesus »

Nova Andromeda wrote:--As a loyal subject of the true gods I must inform everyone of their place in life. You see we were put on the planet for only one reason: to serve cats! I find it amazing people don't recognize this fact! Since my current goddess is Galadriel I will of course vote for her as Supreme Goddess of Cuteness(TM).
Hear! Hear! Why would anyone want a dog? They're too needy. A dog god would require all kinds of attention, but a cat, on the other hand, only requires a basic amount of care plus the obvious respect due any Higher Being. Really, which would you rather have, a god that demands attention at every whim or a god that sleeps 18 hours a day?

And my Flash could take on Fuzzy anyday.
"Can you eat quarks? Can you spread them on your bed when the cold weather comes?" -Bernard Levin

"Sir: Mr. Bernard Levin asks 'Can you eat quarks?' I estimate that he eats 500,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,001 quarks a day...Yours faithfully..." -Sir Alan Cottrell


Elohim's loving mercy: "Hey, you, don't turn around. WTF! I said DON'T tur- you know what, you're a pillar of salt now. Bitch." - an anonymous commenter
Raoul Duke, Jr.
BANNED
Posts: 3791
Joined: 2002-09-25 06:59pm
Location: Suckling At The Teat Of Missmanners

Post by Raoul Duke, Jr. »

Kaalimukifunosigataminozaradonar Foss. a.k.a., Aloysius Valdez, a.ka. Not The Coffee Guy, and his running-mate The Holy Toaster.

Or my cat.
User avatar
Lord of the Farce
Jedi Council Member
Posts: 2198
Joined: 2002-08-06 10:49am
Location: Melbourne, Australia
Contact:

Post by Lord of the Farce »

Rathark wrote:
Straha wrote:And where is this invisible dragon?
<-------!!!!!!!!
The key work is "Invisible"... "Invisible!"
"Intelligent Design" Not Accepted by Most Scientists
User avatar
Lord of the Farce
Jedi Council Member
Posts: 2198
Joined: 2002-08-06 10:49am
Location: Melbourne, Australia
Contact:

Post by Lord of the Farce »

Johonebesus wrote:Hear! Hear! Why would anyone want a dog? They're too needy. A dog god would require all kinds of attention, but a cat, on the other hand, only requires a basic amount of care plus the obvious respect due any Higher Being. Really, which would you rather have, a god that demands attention at every whim or a god that sleeps 18 hours a day?
You kidding us? I mean, would you trade enslavement to the every whim of some sadistic God(s) for the enslavement to the every whim of another sadistic God?
"Intelligent Design" Not Accepted by Most Scientists
Johonebesus
Jedi Master
Posts: 1487
Joined: 2002-07-06 11:26pm

Post by Johonebesus »

Lord of the Farce wrote:You kidding us? I mean, would you trade enslavement to the every whim of some sadistic God(s) for the enslavement to the every whim of another sadistic God?
A. It's the lesser of two evils. If we have to have a god, a cat would be far less demanding than a dog. I bet Flash doesn't ask for nearly as much as Cookie.

B. Cats are more suited to godhood anyway. It is natural to serve cats. It is unnatural to serve dogs.

C. No offense to Wong, Fuzzy is very cute and I'm sure a fine companion, but I refuse to bow down to that little dust-mop thing. The domestic cat is still a powerful predator. It hasn't had tens of thousands of years of domestication as a slave to soften it up, and has suffered only a minimum of genetic manipulation through breeding. Like I said, even my cat could take on Fuzzy.
"Can you eat quarks? Can you spread them on your bed when the cold weather comes?" -Bernard Levin

"Sir: Mr. Bernard Levin asks 'Can you eat quarks?' I estimate that he eats 500,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,001 quarks a day...Yours faithfully..." -Sir Alan Cottrell


Elohim's loving mercy: "Hey, you, don't turn around. WTF! I said DON'T tur- you know what, you're a pillar of salt now. Bitch." - an anonymous commenter
User avatar
His Divine Shadow
Commence Primary Ignition
Posts: 12791
Joined: 2002-07-03 07:22am
Location: Finland, west coast

Post by His Divine Shadow »

Darth Wong wrote:
Howedar wrote:
Darth Wong wrote:Only if we need a genocidal butcher in charge. No thanks.

VOTE FUZZY!!!
I didn't say anything about his benevolence or lack thereof, just his astounding job experience ;)
Experience only counts as a bonus if you did a good job last time.

VOTE FUZZY!!!
http://www.stardestroyer.net/Mike/Famil ... Fuzzy3.jpg
I believe I shall vote for my cat Frida instead:
Image
Image
Image

Though it doesn't feel right to leave her sister out of it, I'd vote for 'em both.
Those who beat their swords into plowshares will plow for those who did not.
User avatar
Oddity
Padawan Learner
Posts: 232
Joined: 2002-07-09 09:33pm
Location: A place of fire and ice

Post by Oddity »

T-800 from 'Terminator II'.

'Hasta La Vista, Baby!"

Booom!

:twisted:
Supreme Ninja Hacker Mage Lord of the Internet | Evil Satanic Atheist
[img=left]http://www.geocities.com/johnny_nanonic/sig/sig.gif[/img] The best way to accelerate a Macintosh is at 9.8m sec sec.
User avatar
Queeb Salaron
Jedi Council Member
Posts: 2337
Joined: 2003-03-12 12:45am
Location: Left of center.

Post by Queeb Salaron »

His Divine Shadow wrote:Kitties
Caption: "Dinner for you and a friend. (Duct tape and acetylene torches not included.)"

Which reminds me: I'm hungry.




::Ducks and covers::
Proud owner of The Fleshlight
G.A.L.E. Force - Bisexual Airborn Division
SDnet Resident Psycho Clown

"I hear and behold God in every object, yet I understand God not in the least, / Nor do I understand who there can be more wonderful than myself."
--Whitman

Fucking Funny.
User avatar
His Divine Shadow
Commence Primary Ignition
Posts: 12791
Joined: 2002-07-03 07:22am
Location: Finland, west coast

Post by His Divine Shadow »

Queeb Salaron wrote:
His Divine Shadow wrote:Kitties
Caption: "Dinner for you and a friend. (Duct tape and acetylene torches not included.)"
Piss off.
Those who beat their swords into plowshares will plow for those who did not.
User avatar
Peregrin Toker
Emperor's Hand
Posts: 8609
Joined: 2002-07-04 10:57am
Location: Denmark
Contact:

Post by Peregrin Toker »

His Divine Shadow wrote:
Darth Wong wrote:
Howedar wrote: I didn't say anything about his benevolence or lack thereof, just his astounding job experience ;)
Experience only counts as a bonus if you did a good job last time.

VOTE FUZZY!!!
http://www.stardestroyer.net/Mike/Famil ... Fuzzy3.jpg
I believe I shall vote for my cat Frida instead:
Image
Image
Image

Though it doesn't feel right to leave her sister out of it, I'd vote for 'em both.
Electing a dog as supreme overlord is one thing, choosing a cat to do the job is even weirder.
"Hi there, would you like to have a cookie?"

"No, actually I would HATE to have a cookie, you vapid waste of inedible flesh!"
User avatar
His Divine Shadow
Commence Primary Ignition
Posts: 12791
Joined: 2002-07-03 07:22am
Location: Finland, west coast

Post by His Divine Shadow »

Electing a dog as supreme overlord is one thing, choosing a cat to do the job is even weirder.
No, it is the only logical conclusion.
Those who beat their swords into plowshares will plow for those who did not.
User avatar
Queeb Salaron
Jedi Council Member
Posts: 2337
Joined: 2003-03-12 12:45am
Location: Left of center.

Post by Queeb Salaron »

His Divine Shadow wrote:Piss off.
Get over yourself. It was a joke.
Proud owner of The Fleshlight
G.A.L.E. Force - Bisexual Airborn Division
SDnet Resident Psycho Clown

"I hear and behold God in every object, yet I understand God not in the least, / Nor do I understand who there can be more wonderful than myself."
--Whitman

Fucking Funny.
Post Reply