so-called "biblical prophecy"
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- Guardsman Bass
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so-called "biblical prophecy"
Hey,
While meandering in the public library, I happened to see a book sitting on the table called something like the "Bible Code," written by a journalist. I glanced in it, and noticed that it supposedly showed that in the text are shown events that will occur thousands of years later. For example, on one page, it shows that in the Hebrew, you can find the words "McVeigh" and other words such as the date of the Oklahoma bombing and such. I think it is bs; it seemed more like they ran the entire bible through a computer until they came up with every possible combination of letters, so that it seemed like there was prophecy.
While meandering in the public library, I happened to see a book sitting on the table called something like the "Bible Code," written by a journalist. I glanced in it, and noticed that it supposedly showed that in the text are shown events that will occur thousands of years later. For example, on one page, it shows that in the Hebrew, you can find the words "McVeigh" and other words such as the date of the Oklahoma bombing and such. I think it is bs; it seemed more like they ran the entire bible through a computer until they came up with every possible combination of letters, so that it seemed like there was prophecy.
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- Master of Ossus
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Actually, the Bible code uses only the most original texts available (Dead Sea scrolls). It is still crap.
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And "Nedal Nib Amaso" spelled backwards is "Osama bin Laden!" It was so obvious all along. Why didn't we see the these signs? They were right there in front of us all this time!RayCav of ASVS wrote:Wouldn't that be "Nedal Nib Amaso!"?
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The "Biblical Code" is proof that it's always easy to find ways to construct prophecy after the fact.
They never use these codes to accurately predict events BEFORE they happen, yet they still have the gall to call them "prophecies".
They never use these codes to accurately predict events BEFORE they happen, yet they still have the gall to call them "prophecies".
"It's not evil for God to do it. Or for someone to do it at God's command."- Jonathan Boyd on baby-killing
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"you guys are fascinated with the use of those "rules of logic" to the extent that you don't really want to discussus anything."- GC
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Either that, or they make glaringly obvious predictions. It's a well-known historical fact that all nations will eventually fall, and yet the Bible thumpers act as if the Bible's prediction that certain nations will fall is proof of its infallibility.
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Re: so-called "biblical prophecy"
You got it. There is a method to the madness, but it has more to do with random chance than profecy. You can get the same predictions from any text, as long as it is long enough.Guardsman Bass wrote:Hey,
While meandering in the public library, I happened to see a book sitting on the table called something like the "Bible Code," written by a journalist. I glanced in it, and noticed that it supposedly showed that in the text are shown events that will occur thousands of years later. For example, on one page, it shows that in the Hebrew, you can find the words "McVeigh" and other words such as the date of the Oklahoma bombing and such. I think it is bs; it seemed more like they ran the entire bible through a computer until they came up with every possible combination of letters, so that it seemed like there was prophecy.
http://skepdic.com/bibcode.html
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I've spoken to the kind of people who look for and make these bible-to-real events connections. When I scoffed at the bible's ability to make predictions on (as was the fashion at the time) the attack on the World Trade Centre buildings, he said that the bible had this prophesy for 2000 years, and we'd just failed to pay enough attention to the bible to make the connections. In his mind, this was proof that we need to pay even *closer* attention to the bible.
And now, there's talk about editing the bible to 'bring it up to speed' with the modern world. Does this involve a giant disclaimer warning on the cover? Not a chance, bub.
...Hey, wait...that's what we need to do. We need to start printing bibles the way they do cigarette boxes. With a giant warning label on it like, "The Surgeon General has determined that you internalizing the contents of this book may cause the Surgeon General to laugh himself into a fucking coma as he sits at home sipping martinis and wondering how you people can be so stupid as to believe this stuff, and in fact would just as soon you suck back a couple of unfiltered Camels, because he figures there's less harm from second-hand smoke as from you doing anything in the name of this book or the characters therein."
And now, there's talk about editing the bible to 'bring it up to speed' with the modern world. Does this involve a giant disclaimer warning on the cover? Not a chance, bub.
...Hey, wait...that's what we need to do. We need to start printing bibles the way they do cigarette boxes. With a giant warning label on it like, "The Surgeon General has determined that you internalizing the contents of this book may cause the Surgeon General to laugh himself into a fucking coma as he sits at home sipping martinis and wondering how you people can be so stupid as to believe this stuff, and in fact would just as soon you suck back a couple of unfiltered Camels, because he figures there's less harm from second-hand smoke as from you doing anything in the name of this book or the characters therein."
Note: I'm semi-retired from the board, so if you need something, please be patient.
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I remember once reading about how codes derived from a telephone book revealed several accurate prophecies about Bill Gates.
All hail the holy telephone books
All hail the holy telephone books
Evil Horseman, ready to torment the damned!
YOU SHALL BE AS GODS
YOU SHALL BE AS GODS
YOU SHALL BE AS GODS
Am I annoying you yet?
YOU SHALL BE AS GODS
YOU SHALL BE AS GODS
YOU SHALL BE AS GODS
YOU SHALL BE AS GODS
Am I annoying you yet?
YOU SHALL BE AS GODS
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One of the things that they harped on was that if the Bible was compressed into a single, very long word, and then they took every eleven letters (or so), they could spell "Yitzak Rabin." In the same part of the Bible, if you took a completely different number and then counted out those letters, you could get the words, "Assassin will assassinate." How is that a prophecy? It doesn't even make sense. True codes are written in a consistent cipher. Also, part of the reason why they have not found such coincidences in other long works is that all of the other works they used have been in English. In Hebrew, words can be formed by almost any combination of letters, and so randomly generating words should be far easier to do with a Hebrew text than with an English or even a German one. Of course they will find more words in a Hebrew book than they would in an English one.
"Sometimes I think you WANT us to fail." "Shut up, just shut up!" -Two Guys from Kabul
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"one soler flar can vapririze the planit or malt the nickl in lass than millasacit" -Bagara1000
"Happiness is just a Flaming Moe away."
Latinum Star Recipient; Hacker's Cross Award Winner
"one soler flar can vapririze the planit or malt the nickl in lass than millasacit" -Bagara1000
"Happiness is just a Flaming Moe away."
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God must really hate us then. I mean, it's in the bible it's got to be true.Wicked Pilot wrote: In the NIV version, if you take the 60th, 95th, 99th, 249th, 273rd, 331st, and 455th letters of Genesis and spell them out, you get "fuck you."
Coincidence? I don't think so.
LOL
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Take a look at this:
http://cs.anu.edu.au/~bdm/dilugim/moby.html
It's the results of a similar analysis on Moby Dick. Fun, fun, fun!
http://cs.anu.edu.au/~bdm/dilugim/moby.html
It's the results of a similar analysis on Moby Dick. Fun, fun, fun!
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- Wicked Pilot
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What do 1874, 1914, 1917, and 1975 have in common? They're dates the Jehova Wittnesses predicted Christ would return. Obviously they were wrong.
The JW leadership explained that it was all a big test and the reason Christ didn't come was because the JWs expected him!
The JW leadership explained that it was all a big test and the reason Christ didn't come was because the JWs expected him!
The most basic assumption about the world is that it does not contradict itself.
Next of Kin wrote:I don't understand why Christians look for signs of the end days. The bible states that no one will know!
The funny thing is that supposedly Christ was going to return during the lifetimes of the Apostles (that's what they expected), but my favorite has to be Revelations. It's supposed to be a prophecy about the end times to come right?
Wrong, it may have been intended as a prophecy of sorts but it was just Christians writing smack about Nero and Rome and how they were going to go down (once again right then not 2000 years later). All of this is wrapped up in a bunch of symbolism to sound cool and probably protect the asses of those who were spouting off about it but it sure isn't something that is going to happen in our future.
Monty Python's: The Life of Brian has some pretty hilarious stuff making fun of all the religious sects who wrote their own "manifestos" about getting rid of the Romans and taking over the world. Of course none of them had any hope of backing it up so they had to hope that God would do it for them.
The Dead Sea scrolls, besides having the oldest version of the Bible, also have some stuff by a sect that talks smack on how they are even better than the typical Jew living in Jerusalem and that one day they will conquer all and take back Jerusalem. Smack talking was and is a big part of religion, kind of a way to draw people in.
By the pricking of my thumb,
Something wicked this way comes.
Open, locks,
Whoever knocks.
Something wicked this way comes.
Open, locks,
Whoever knocks.
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I saw an ad in my newspaper that used increasing numbers of natural disasters, and moral issues as "proof" of the second coming of Christ. Even funnier are those JWs that use current events as "proof" of the apocalypse. Ooh, we can clone a sheep! Oh no, we'll all be smited!
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I had a class dealing with technological societal issues last year, so we touched on cloning. I pretty much systematically dismantled all the anti-cloning arguments that people put forth, but this one girl was actually afraid that, if we cloned a human, Jesus Christ would come down and give us all a big slap on the wrist.
I did my best to keep from laughing my balls off.
I did my best to keep from laughing my balls off.
Damien Sorresso
"Ever see what them computa bitchez do to numbas? It ain't natural. Numbas ain't supposed to be code, they supposed to quantify shit."
- The Onion
"Ever see what them computa bitchez do to numbas? It ain't natural. Numbas ain't supposed to be code, they supposed to quantify shit."
- The Onion
I think it's similar to people putting stock into prophecies by Nostradameus. That is, some folks are scared of the unknown and are looking for answers, any answers, in order to feel safe. In this case, the "unknown" being the future.I don't understand why Christians look for signs of the end days. The bible states that no one will know! - Next of Kin
One time I was in a Christian chat room and was talking to one fellow. Far be it for me to cut someone down but this poor guy was becoming more strident about the "end of the world". This was a short time after 9-11. He was convinced that the New York Yankees would beat the Arizona Diamondbacks for the World series. He was convinced that the Yankees symbolized the force of good and that the Diamondbacks were evil. Snakes are evil, right?
I never found out what happened to him after Arizona won.
XPViking
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Perhaps he preached the end of the world again, and then killed himself? I would say the Yankees are evil with winning 25 World Series games, and having the highest paid players in the league.XPViking wrote:I don't understand why Christians look for signs of the end days. The bible states that no one will know! - Next of Kin
I never found out what happened to him after Arizona won.
XPViking
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Well, it looks like the jig is up. The Christians are onto the plot. Might as well come clean ...
OK, it's all true. The end times are coming, and ... I'm the AntiChrist
OK, it's all true. The end times are coming, and ... I'm the AntiChrist
"It's not evil for God to do it. Or for someone to do it at God's command."- Jonathan Boyd on baby-killing
"you guys are fascinated with the use of those "rules of logic" to the extent that you don't really want to discussus anything."- GC
"I do not believe Russian Roulette is a stupid act" - Embracer of Darkness
"Viagra commercials appear to save lives" - tharkûn on US health care.
http://www.stardestroyer.net/Mike/RantMode/Blurbs.html
"you guys are fascinated with the use of those "rules of logic" to the extent that you don't really want to discussus anything."- GC
"I do not believe Russian Roulette is a stupid act" - Embracer of Darkness
"Viagra commercials appear to save lives" - tharkûn on US health care.
http://www.stardestroyer.net/Mike/RantMode/Blurbs.html