Boys don't cook

[Rob Wilson]

bah! amatuer!
chris' chicken parm

well tenderized breasts (a chicken's, not zaia's) pound them with a tenderizer hammer thingie until they are flat.
dip them in an egg wash and into flour, back into the egg wash and then into a breadcrum/seasoning mix (availablt at the local market).
fry in extra virgin olive oil at about 350-375 degrees F until golden brown.

prep the sauce. all you realy need are some fresh roma tomatoes and basil with a pinch of salt and a few cloves of garlic. dice the tomatoes, drain away the excess liquida nd warm in a saucepan. add basil salt and FINELY chopped garlic cloves. you really want to just warm the mixture, don't let it simmer too long.

place chicken on broiling pan, cover with tomato mixture as well as provolone and motzzerella cheeses. broil until cheese is melted and bubbly.

serve with marinated artichoke, salad and some nice crusty sicillian bread!

Do you use a premixed seasoned Breadcrumb dressing or do you season your own? The preseasoned stuff tends to be bland in my experience. And what is this obsession everyone here has for putting tomatoes in everything, they're just big lumps of tasteless pap once cooked. The only Good thing connected with tomatoes is Ketchup and most of that flvour is artificial. Thankfully i don't have to add the salad bit either.

For an interesting alternative place the chicken under the grill for the last minute of cooking, addss a nice crispy textured coating to the outer cheese with the melted cheese underneath. Also don't forget to prick the chicken with the fork before adding the cheese as it allows the cheese to be partially absorbed by th chicken rather than just sitting on the breadcrumb outer.

[Rob Wilson]

This is tres yummy for the summertime. And a bit gourmet.

Loster Salad

3 cups cooked lobster meat
1/2 cup finely chopped celery
1/2 cup mayonnaise (light mayo or Miracle Whip yummy too)
1 1/2 tablespoons heavy cream
salt to taste
1 head Bibb lettuce

Cut the lobster meat into large, bite-size pieces, place them in a bowl, and add the celery. Blend the mayonnasie and cream in a small bowl, then gently combine with the lobster, toss to mix, and add salt. Arrange a bed of lettuce leaves and put the loster salad on top (ooh la la, fancy-shmancy!).

Serves four. Mmmmmmm.....

Sounds nice, but Lobsters are a bit on the scarce side over here, and stupidly expensive.

[Iceberg]

This is tres yummy for the summertime. And a bit gourmet.

Loster Salad

3 cups cooked lobster meat
1/2 cup finely chopped celery
1/2 cup mayonnaise (light mayo or Miracle Whip yummy too)
1 1/2 tablespoons heavy cream
salt to taste
1 head Bibb lettuce

Cut the lobster meat into large, bite-size pieces, place them in a bowl, and add the celery. Blend the mayonnasie and cream in a small bowl, then gently combine with the lobster, toss to mix, and add salt. Arrange a bed of lettuce leaves and put the loster salad on top (ooh la la, fancy-shmancy!).

Serves four. Mmmmmmm.....

Sounds nice, but Lobsters are a bit on the scarce side over here, and stupidly expensive.

How expensive is "stupidly"? They're ten bucks a pound in Winona.

[Iceberg]

Hey, I know that most of the guys reading this aren't going to want to go gourmet. They want something simple and tasty. Ta-da!

Well, you're tasty but you don't seem all that simple...

*chuckles and kisses Ice's cheek* True, not simple, but neither am I gourmet....somewhere around the complexity of a complex carbohydrate, methinks.

*recovers from blush-induced incoherence* Gourmet is good for impressing a date, but I can't justify doing it just for myself...

[Ghost Rider]

Well for us...it's not too bad(I can go to the Fish market) but it's only certain times of the season can I get Lobster.

[Rob Wilson]

You know, I don't want to derail this topic again, but as I walk around my house, I keep looking down at my breasts, trying to figure out what's so scary about them. They just look pleasantly round and cuddly to me.

Well, I'll have to verify that for my - nah too easy.

Pleasantly round and cuddly is nice, but do they bounce well? - nah, too reminiscient of Dargos's missing sig.

Any chance of Photo evidence - nah, been done before.

Jumps on breasts to sav - nah, getting old fast.

*cuddles Zaia* don't ever change, we like you just the way you are, no matter how scared Eleas may get. - Yeah, that'll do nicely.

[Iceberg]

You know, I don't want to derail this topic again, but as I walk around my house, I keep looking down at my breasts, trying to figure out what's so scary about them. They just look pleasantly round and cuddly to me.

Well, I'll have to verify that for my - nah too easy.

Pleasantly round and cuddly is nice, but do they bounce well? - nah, too reminiscient of Dargos's missing sig.

Any chance of Photo evidence - nah, been done before.

Jumps on breasts to sav - nah, getting old fast.

*cuddles Zaia* don't ever change, we like you just the way you are, no matter how scared Eleas may get. - Yeah, that'll do nicely.

Yeah, what he said. And make it a double for me.

[Rob Wilson]

Sounds nice, but Lobsters are a bit on the scarce side over here, and stupidly expensive.

How expensive is "stupidly"? They're ten bucks a pound in Winona.

About £30 ($48 approx) for a small Lobster. Crab meats cheap though, but not as tasty or textured when cooked.

[Zaia]

Sounds nice, but Lobsters are a bit on the scarce side over here, and stupidly expensive.

How expensive is "stupidly"? They're ten bucks a pound in Winona.

About £30 ($48 approx) for a small Lobster. Crab meats cheap though, but not as tasty or textured when cooked.

Well, substitue crab meat, then, and imagine it tasting a bit nicer than it actually does.

*laughs and cuddles Rob Wilson & Iceberg* Thanks, guys. You picked a perfect day for this.

[Iceberg]

Sounds nice, but Lobsters are a bit on the scarce side over here, and stupidly expensive.

How expensive is "stupidly"? They're ten bucks a pound in Winona.

About £30 ($48 approx) for a small Lobster. Crab meats cheap though, but not as tasty or textured when cooked.

Well, an average lobster that we get is a pound and a half to two pounds, so that's fifteen-twenty bucks for a meal, BEFORE you count in the strained corn sauce made with drawn butter, the fluffy baked potatoes and the veggies.

Of course, the rewards afterward for sharing this lovely meal are quite worth it.

[EmperorMing]

I *can* cook; I'm just lazy. Besides, my roomate likes to cook so much, I buy the food and let him prepare it...

[Ghost Rider]

About £30 ($48 approx) for a small Lobster. Crab meats cheap though, but not as tasty or textured when cooked.

Well, an average lobster that we get is a pound and a half to two pounds, so that's fifteen-twenty bucks for a meal, BEFORE you count in the strained corn sauce made with drawn butter, the fluffy baked potatoes and the veggies.

Of course, the rewards afterward for sharing this lovely meal are quite worth it. [/quote]

Hopeful rewards, usually I've just gotten my cats licking my fingers .

[El Moose Monstero]

Jamie Oliver

Arrrgh, don't mention tht twats name. It is the anti-christ lisping in the ears of everyone, making it's terible incantation "Pukka, Pukka, Pukka, Sweet."

I kinda liked his show until I realized that nobody who hasn't attended a cooking school could actually prepare some of the food he was making on his show. That kind of stuff kinda bugs me.

Yeh, I know what you mean, I think Jamie Oliver was a sort of cross between your basic cooking programmes such as Delia Smith's stuff, which you can actually do with relatively little fuss, and things like Gordon Ramsey's stuff, which is blindingly complicated and too poncy to do for anyone to cook as a regular meal.

To be honest, I'd be surprised if anyone who watched his (Oliver's) shows actually went grabbing for a pen when he went through the recipe on TV, the shows were more about lifestyle and food pornography. If you actually wanted to cook anything from his stuff, then you buy the recipe books, which I might add, are 50% lifestyle and glossy pictures of what it should look like when cooked by a grade-a chef.

[Iceberg]

Arrrgh, don't mention tht twats name. It is the anti-christ lisping in the ears of everyone, making it's terible incantation "Pukka, Pukka, Pukka, Sweet."

I kinda liked his show until I realized that nobody who hasn't attended a cooking school could actually prepare some of the food he was making on his show. That kind of stuff kinda bugs me.

Yeh, I know what you mean, I think Jamie Oliver was a sort of cross between your basic cooking programmes such as Delia Smith's stuff, which you can actually do with relatively little fuss, and things like Gordon Ramsey's stuff, which is blindingly complicated and too poncy to do for anyone to cook as a regular meal.

To be honest, I'd be surprised if anyone who watched his (Oliver's) shows actually went grabbing for a pen when he went through the recipe on TV, the shows were more about lifestyle and food pornography. If you actually wanted to cook anything from his stuff, then you buy the recipe books, which I might add, are 50% lifestyle and glossy pictures of what it should look like when cooked by a grade-a chef.

"Good Eats" is an excellent cooking program in the States, on Food Network. Host Alton Brown shows you the science and art of cooking. It's like "Bill Nye: the Science Guy" that you can eat. I like it Very Much(tm).

Wednesdays and Saturdays at 9PM and 12PM ET; Sundays at 6:30PM ET.

[neoolong]

The recipes for the tv shows on Food Network are on the site anyways. For the most part.

[Alex Moon]

I kinda liked his show until I realized that nobody who hasn't attended a cooking school could actually prepare some of the food he was making on his show. That kind of stuff kinda bugs me.

Yeh, I know what you mean, I think Jamie Oliver was a sort of cross between your basic cooking programmes such as Delia Smith's stuff, which you can actually do with relatively little fuss, and things like Gordon Ramsey's stuff, which is blindingly complicated and too poncy to do for anyone to cook as a regular meal.

To be honest, I'd be surprised if anyone who watched his (Oliver's) shows actually went grabbing for a pen when he went through the recipe on TV, the shows were more about lifestyle and food pornography. If you actually wanted to cook anything from his stuff, then you buy the recipe books, which I might add, are 50% lifestyle and glossy pictures of what it should look like when cooked by a grade-a chef.

"Good Eats" is an excellent cooking program in the States, on Food Network. Host Alton Brown shows you the science and art of cooking. It's like "Bill Nye: the Science Guy" that you can eat. I like it Very Much(tm).

Wednesdays and Saturdays at 9PM and 12PM ET; Sundays at 6:30PM ET.

I love that show. It's too bad that my cable in the dorms doesn't get that channel, because that show was so cool!

[neoolong]

Yeah Good Eats was good. Until I lost my cable.

You can find his recipes on foodtv.com though.

[Kelly Antilles]

*wipes tears from eyes* Oh my god... you guys... I've never laughed so hard. I really needed that...

[Col. Crackpot]

bah! amatuer!
chris' chicken parm

well tenderized breasts (a chicken's, not zaia's) pound them with a tenderizer hammer thingie until they are flat.
dip them in an egg wash and into flour, back into the egg wash and then into a breadcrum/seasoning mix (availablt at the local market).
fry in extra virgin olive oil at about 350-375 degrees F until golden brown.

prep the sauce. all you realy need are some fresh roma tomatoes and basil with a pinch of salt and a few cloves of garlic. dice the tomatoes, drain away the excess liquida nd warm in a saucepan. add basil salt and FINELY chopped garlic cloves. you really want to just warm the mixture, don't let it simmer too long.

place chicken on broiling pan, cover with tomato mixture as well as provolone and motzzerella cheeses. broil until cheese is melted and bubbly.

serve with marinated artichoke, salad and some nice crusty sicillian bread!

Do you use a premixed seasoned Breadcrumb dressing or do you season your own? The preseasoned stuff tends to be bland in my experience. And what is this obsession everyone here has for putting tomatoes in everything, they're just big lumps of tasteless pap once cooked. The only Good thing connected with tomatoes is Ketchup and most of that flvour is artificial. Thankfully i don't have to add the salad bit either.

For an interesting alternative place the chicken under the grill for the last minute of cooking, addss a nice crispy textured coating to the outer cheese with the melted cheese underneath. Also don't forget to prick the chicken with the fork before adding the cheese as it allows the cheese to be partially absorbed by th chicken rather than just sitting on the breadcrumb outer.

actually Roma tomatoes are quite flavorfull compared to regular beefsteak tomatoes.....therefore not a flavorless pap after cooking. Also i use fresh sweet basil leaves, chopped coarsely, that with fresh garlic really complements the flavor of the tomato. As for the breading, i make my own breadcrumbs out of stale bread, garlic, basil, oregano, parsley and onion salt if i have time.

[Zaia]

*wipes tears from eyes* Oh my god... you guys... I've never laughed so hard. I really needed that...

[Col. Crackpot]

*wipes tears from eyes* Oh my god... you guys... I've never laughed so hard. I really needed that...

if you want i can tenderize your breasts with a hammer tenderizer thingie too...

[Ghost Rider]

*wipes tears from eyes* Oh my god... you guys... I've never laughed so hard. I really needed that...

if you want i can tenderize your breasts with a hammer tenderizer thingie too...

No tenderizing...that's just too painful

unless you're into that

[Sir Sirius]

Spaghetti Bolognese

olive oil
1 onion, chopped
1 carrot, chopped
1 cellery stick, chopped
3 garlic cloves
350 g ground beef
2 dl dry red wine
3 dl milk
400 g chopped tomatoes
2 Tbsp sun-dried tomato paste
1 Tsp dried basil
1 Tsp dried oregano
1 seeded and chopped fresh chili pepper
salt
black pepper
Parmesan cheese

- Heat 3-4 Tbsp of olive oil in a large sauce pan. Add the chopped onion, carrot, cellery and garlic cloves and cook for about 5 minutes.
- Add the minced beef and cook until browned.
- Add the red wine and cook over a low heat until all of the wine has evaporated.
- Add the milk and cook over a low heat until all of the milk has evaporated.
- Add the chopped tomatoes, sun-dried tomato paste, dried basil, dried oregano, chopped chili pepper, salt, black pepper and 1 dl of water and cook over the lowest heat for at least 1 hour, preferably for 2 or 3 hours. Add water if the sauce becomes too thick.
- Boil the Spaghetti in salted water until well done.
- Serve with Parmesan cheese.

[Kelly Antilles]

*wipes tears from eyes* Oh my god... you guys... I've never laughed so hard. I really needed that...

if you want i can tenderize your breasts with a hammer tenderizer thingie too...

*blink*
Trying not to leave me out, eh? Hm... *goes to think about it*

[Rob Wilson]

To be honest, I'd be surprised if anyone who watched his (Oliver's) shows actually went grabbing for a pen when he went through the recipe on TV, the shows were more about lifestyle and food pornography. If you actually wanted to cook anything from his stuff, then you buy the recipe books, which I might add, are 50% lifestyle and glossy pictures of what it should look like when cooked by a grade-a chef.

"Good Eats" is an excellent cooking program in the States, on Food Network. Host Alton Brown shows you the science and art of cooking. It's like "Bill Nye: the Science Guy" that you can eat. I like it Very Much(tm).

Wednesdays and Saturdays at 9PM and 12PM ET; Sundays at 6:30PM ET.

The best TV cook is Nigella Lawson, simply becuase you can imagine licking the dessert of her sweet and cuddly body

And Iceberg, on behalf of the Uk I'd like to apologise for the atrocities of Jamie Oliver and unleashing it on an unsuspecting nation... still makes up for you giving us the Golden Girls I suppose.