Chick is getting rapture ready!

InnerBrat · Post by **InnerBrat** » 2003-05-02 12:31pm

I'm amused by the returning characters. not only is Bob the Porno CHristian in evey tract nowadays - Mary Ann's brother was converted from Catholicism in an earlier tract.

(I read these things too much, don't I?)

Admiral Valdemar · Post by **Admiral Valdemar** » 2003-05-02 12:33pm

innerbrat wrote:I'm amused by the returning characters. not only is Bob the Porno CHristian in evey tract nowadays - Mary Ann's brother was converted from Catholicism in an earlier tract.

(I read these things too much, don't I?)

Poor innerbrat, your brain must ache.

Stravo · Post by **Stravo** » 2003-05-02 12:33pm

innerbrat wrote:I'm amused by the returning characters. not only is Bob the Porno CHristian in evey tract nowadays - Mary Ann's brother was converted from Catholicism in an earlier tract.

(I read these things too much, don't I?)

Hey, there's more continuity in Chick Tracts than B&B Trek these days.

Glocksman · Post by **Glocksman** » 2003-05-02 01:06pm

Stravo wrote:

Hey, there's more continuity in Chick Tracts than B&B Trek these days.

Heh..

Chick Trek, The Next Generation

Perhaps someone who is blessed with the ability to write exellent stories

ought to write a parody of Trek featuring Chick and Chick characters.

Just so long as it doesn't interfere with chapters to StarCrossed.

InnerBrat · Post by **InnerBrat** » 2003-05-02 02:33pm

Admiral Valdemar wrote:
innerbrat wrote:I'm amused by the returning characters. not only is Bob the Porno CHristian in evey tract nowadays - Mary Ann's brother was converted from Catholicism in an earlier tract.

(I read these things too much, don't I?)
Poor innerbrat, your brain must ache.

My brain always aches. I work it too hard
But I got a first today, so it hurts for a good cause.

Iceberg · Post by **Iceberg** » 2003-05-02 02:43pm

innerbrat wrote:I'm amused by the returning characters. not only is Bob the Porno CHristian in evey tract nowadays - Mary Ann's brother was converted from Catholicism in an earlier tract.

(I read these things too much, don't I?)

Yeah, you do.

Iceberg · Post by **Iceberg** » 2003-05-02 03:19pm

Jack's older tracts were much better than these modern messes. Sure, they were hate-filled, ignorant and really, REALLY crappy, but he knew how to get to a point, make it, and end the tract.

I'm SO tempted to put "Satanic Vatican Pope-Worshipping Enslaver of Millions" in my sig line.

Asst. Asst. Lt. Cmdr. Smi · Post by **Asst. Asst. Lt. Cmdr. Smi** » 2003-05-02 10:42pm

I see the effects of aging have hit Chick over the years. He's gone from bigoted and narrow-minded, to bigoted, narrow-minded, paranoid, and nonsensical. And the tracts pretty much repeat themself: Gay/Jew/Muslim/Catholic/Buddist/D&D player are saved by either some really religous guy that pops in at the right time, someone that looks like the star of a bad prono (perhaps both), and everyone's happy.

Iceberg · Post by **Iceberg** » 2003-05-02 10:49pm

I think Jack wishes he were Catholic. Think about it - everybody except for the Catholic Church are dupes of a greater conspiracy, headed by the Pope and the Vatican.

That means Catholics are the only people that he thinks are smart enough to be truly evil! WOOHOO!

HemlockGrey · Post by **HemlockGrey** » 2003-05-02 11:12pm

Hey, recurring characters are fine, but when are we going to see some major story arcs?

Yuri Prime · Post by **Yuri Prime** » 2003-05-02 11:40pm

Chick logic hurts my brain... It's so far fetched and blatently wrong.

Peregrin Toker · Post by **Peregrin Toker** » 2003-05-03 01:55am

This one felt like a bad religious propaganda.... oh wait, it IS bad religious propaganda.

Peregrin Toker · Post by **Peregrin Toker** » 2003-05-03 01:56am

innerbrat wrote:I'm amused by the returning characters. not only is Bob the Porno CHristian in evey tract nowadays - Mary Ann's brother was converted from Catholicism in an earlier tract.

Actually, most tracts he makes today are part of a "Bible Bob" series!

neoolong · Post by **neoolong** » 2003-05-03 03:23am

Simon H.Johansen wrote:
innerbrat wrote:I'm amused by the returning characters. not only is Bob the Porno CHristian in evey tract nowadays - Mary Ann's brother was converted from Catholicism in an earlier tract.
Actually, most tracts he makes today are part of a "Bible Bob" series!

Cue the '70s porn music.

Peregrin Toker · Post by **Peregrin Toker** » 2003-05-03 08:21am

neoolong wrote:
Simon H.Johansen wrote:
innerbrat wrote:I'm amused by the returning characters. not only is Bob the Porno CHristian in evey tract nowadays - Mary Ann's brother was converted from Catholicism in an earlier tract.
Actually, most tracts he makes today are part of a "Bible Bob" series!
Cue the '70s porn music.

Given that Bible Bob looks like Freddie Mercury, wouldn't it be more appropiate to have a soundtrack by Queen??

Admiral Valdemar · Post by **Admiral Valdemar** » 2003-05-03 09:22am

Simon H.Johansen wrote:
neoolong wrote:
Simon H.Johansen wrote: Actually, most tracts he makes today are part of a "Bible Bob" series!
Cue the '70s porn music.
Given that Bible Bob looks like Freddie Mercury, wouldn't it be more appropiate to have a soundtrack by Queen??

You'd get 50 years in the slammer for defacing Queen like that anywhere else.

Grand Admiral Thrawn · Post by **Grand Admiral Thrawn** » 2003-05-03 10:11am

Wait, they put explosives AND sarin gas? That's like putting mustard gas on the tip of a nuke.

Darth Gojira · Post by **Darth Gojira** » 2003-05-03 11:23am

Grand Admiral Thrawn wrote:Wait, they put explosives AND sarin gas? That's like putting mustard gas on the tip of a nuke.

That's Chick for ya. Redundancy is the norm.

JodoForce · Post by **JodoForce** » 2003-05-03 11:37am

What? You telling me this is serious? And all the time I was reading down to see what mad joke they'll pop at the end! Gaaah!

Peregrin Toker · Post by **Peregrin Toker** » 2003-05-04 04:10am

Admiral Valdemar wrote:
Simon H.Johansen wrote:
neoolong wrote: Cue the '70s porn music.
Given that Bible Bob looks like Freddie Mercury, wouldn't it be more appropiate to have a soundtrack by Queen??
You'd get 50 years in the slammer for defacing Queen like that anywhere else.

SHAZBATT!!!

I should have known better! Well, at least Motorhead isn't going to make the soundtrack.... (unless tey have a really weird sense of humour)

Darth Servo · Post by **Darth Servo** » 2003-05-05 12:15pm

The fundies start crying, "the end is near" all the time and have been for centuries. Gets especially bad whenever a trajedy strikes (War on Iraq, 9-11, etc). Nothing new. I wish I had a dollar for every Fundy who said the first Gulf War 10 years ago was the start of Armeggedon.

Darth Gojira · Post by **Darth Gojira** » 2003-05-05 12:28pm

JodoForce wrote:What? You telling me this is serious? And all the time I was reading down to see what mad joke they'll pop at the end! Gaaah!

You haven't read many Chick tracts, have you?

Enforcer Talen · Post by **Enforcer Talen** » 2003-05-05 03:18pm

think of what he's missing!

tell us what you like. then we can find why it will send you to hell.

Stormbringer · Post by **Stormbringer** » 2003-05-05 03:25pm

JodoForce wrote:What? You telling me this is serious? And all the time I was reading down to see what mad joke they'll pop at the end! Gaaah!

Oh no, he's serious. He really does believe the world works this way. Jack Chick actually believes ever last bit of it. And if knowing there are people like that out there isn't enough to terrrify you as to the fate of the human race; the fact he can build a publishing business selling those things will.

Grand Admiral Thrawn · Post by **Grand Admiral Thrawn** » 2003-05-05 04:12pm

Ah, the one down side of nuclear weapons. They give people like Chick a way to claim the end is near!