Weird Shit From The Bible!

SLAM: debunk creationism, pseudoscience, and superstitions. Discuss logic and morality.

Moderator: Alyrium Denryle

Enforcer Talen
Warlock
Posts: 10285
Joined: 2002-07-05 02:28am
Location: Boston
Contact:

Post by Enforcer Talen »

but if he enjoys it, she is unclean, and to be stoned.
Image
This day is Fantastic!
Myers Briggs: ENTJ
Political Compass: -3/-6
DOOMer WoW
"I really hate it when the guy you were pegging as Mr. Worst Case starts saying, "Oh, I was wrong, it's going to be much worse." " - Adrian Laguna
JodoForce
Village Idiot
Posts: 1084
Joined: 2003-02-15 04:27am

Post by JodoForce »

weirdest thing to me is how you have read enough of the book to come up with these. :shock:
User avatar
Darth Wong
Sith Lord
Sith Lord
Posts: 70028
Joined: 2002-07-03 12:25am
Location: Toronto, Canada
Contact:

Post by Darth Wong »

JodoForce wrote:weirdest thing to me is how you have read enough of the book to come up with these. :shock:
If you read the Bible early and often in your life, you are probably a believer. If you wait until you became an adult with critical thinking skills and then read the Bible, you are probably a strong unbeliever :)

In my case, I read the Bible because I wanted to investigate the religion because my wife subscribed to it at the time. I didn't like what I saw, so here we are.
Image
"It's not evil for God to do it. Or for someone to do it at God's command."- Jonathan Boyd on baby-killing

"you guys are fascinated with the use of those "rules of logic" to the extent that you don't really want to discussus anything."- GC

"I do not believe Russian Roulette is a stupid act" - Embracer of Darkness

"Viagra commercials appear to save lives" - tharkûn on US health care.

http://www.stardestroyer.net/Mike/RantMode/Blurbs.html
Raoul Duke, Jr.
BANNED
Posts: 3791
Joined: 2002-09-25 06:59pm
Location: Suckling At The Teat Of Missmanners

Post by Raoul Duke, Jr. »

Darth Wong wrote:
JodoForce wrote:weirdest thing to me is how you have read enough of the book to come up with these. :shock:
If you read the Bible early and often in your life, you are probably a believer. If you wait until you became an adult with critical thinking skills and then read the Bible, you are probably a strong unbeliever :)

In my case, I read the Bible because I wanted to investigate the religion because my wife subscribed to it at the time. I didn't like what I saw, so here we are.
BTW, Mike, want to thank you for having a link to the Skeptic's Annotated Bible on the site -- flat-out dead fuckin' hilarious! Is there anywhere where you can buy a hardcopy version? I have a friend whose birthday is coming up.
User avatar
DPDarkPrimus
Emperor's Hand
Posts: 18399
Joined: 2002-11-22 11:02pm
Location: Iowa
Contact:

Post by DPDarkPrimus »

I was flipping through Leviticus today for some reason, and I noticed a BIG contradicton, in the sections about unclean foods.

First, it says only to eat land animals that have fully split hooves and that chew the cud. Later, it says that all animals of the land are unclean. So... how does that work?
Mayabird is my girlfriend
Justice League:BotM:MM:SDnet City Watch:Cybertron's Finest
"Well then, science is bullshit. "
-revprez, with yet another brilliant rebuttal.
JodoForce
Village Idiot
Posts: 1084
Joined: 2003-02-15 04:27am

Post by JodoForce »

DPDarkPrimus wrote:I was flipping through Leviticus today for some reason, and I noticed a BIG contradicton, in the sections about unclean foods.

First, it says only to eat land animals that have fully split hooves and that chew the cud. Later, it says that all animals of the land are unclean. So... how does that work?
Probably different contexts, or something like 'all animals of the land are unclean but if you had to eat one of those...' :)
In my case, I read the Bible because I wanted to investigate the religion because my wife subscribed to it at the time
Don't tell me you managed to dissuade her from her religion! :shock: :shock:
User avatar
Darth Wong
Sith Lord
Sith Lord
Posts: 70028
Joined: 2002-07-03 12:25am
Location: Toronto, Canada
Contact:

Post by Darth Wong »

JodoForce wrote:
Darth Wong wrote:In my case, I read the Bible because I wanted to investigate the religion because my wife subscribed to it at the time
Don't tell me you managed to dissuade her from her religion! :shock: :shock:
There was no campaign to do so. We had a nice arrangement worked out where I wouldn't try to convert her, she wouldn't try to convert me, the kids would go to Sunday School with her, and I would be free to tell them what I think of religious dogma the other 6 days of the week.

But over time, due to her own research, she ended up dropping the religion. To be more specific, she tried to research the historical origins of the Bible; who wrote it, who collected the manuscripts, how it was assembled, who decided what would be in and what wouldn't, etc. And after doing this research, she decided she could not follow this book any more.

That was when my anti-creationism site went up. I sort of "held back" on that while she was still a churchgoer.
Image
"It's not evil for God to do it. Or for someone to do it at God's command."- Jonathan Boyd on baby-killing

"you guys are fascinated with the use of those "rules of logic" to the extent that you don't really want to discussus anything."- GC

"I do not believe Russian Roulette is a stupid act" - Embracer of Darkness

"Viagra commercials appear to save lives" - tharkûn on US health care.

http://www.stardestroyer.net/Mike/RantMode/Blurbs.html
User avatar
Peregrin Toker
Emperor's Hand
Posts: 8609
Joined: 2002-07-04 10:57am
Location: Denmark
Contact:

Post by Peregrin Toker »

Darth Wong wrote:That was when my anti-creationism site went up. I sort of "held back" on that while she was still a churchgoer.
Your wife used to be a creationist?
"Hi there, would you like to have a cookie?"

"No, actually I would HATE to have a cookie, you vapid waste of inedible flesh!"
User avatar
Setesh
Jedi Master
Posts: 1113
Joined: 2002-07-16 03:27pm
Location: Maine, land of the Laidback
Contact:

Post by Setesh »

speaking of Leviticus

Lev,5:3
Or if he touch the uncleanness of man, whatsoever uncleanness it be that a man shall be defiled withal, and it be hid from him; when he knoweth of it, then he shall be guilty

what the hell is 'uncleaness of man', the bible doesn't say and the SAB doesn't either
"Nobody ever inferred from the multiple infirmities of Windows that Bill Gates was infinitely benevolent, omniscient, and able to fix everything. " Argument against god's perfection.

My Snow's art portfolio.
Raoul Duke, Jr.
BANNED
Posts: 3791
Joined: 2002-09-25 06:59pm
Location: Suckling At The Teat Of Missmanners

Post by Raoul Duke, Jr. »

Setesh wrote:speaking of Leviticus

Lev,5:3
Or if he touch the uncleanness of man, whatsoever uncleanness it be that a man shall be defiled withal, and it be hid from him; when he knoweth of it, then he shall be guilty

what the hell is 'uncleaness of man', the bible doesn't say and the SAB doesn't either
Apparently, this is best translated with a pseudo-British accent...

Lev. 5:3 "Or if he rubs the man's filthy bits, whatever filthy bits that might be what gets his bits filthy, and then the other bloke hides his filthy bits; when he figures out he touched the other chap's filthy bits, he'll feel quite the shite after."
User avatar
Setesh
Jedi Master
Posts: 1113
Joined: 2002-07-16 03:27pm
Location: Maine, land of the Laidback
Contact:

Post by Setesh »

Raoul Duke, Jr. wrote:
Setesh wrote:speaking of Leviticus

Lev,5:3
Or if he touch the uncleanness of man, whatsoever uncleanness it be that a man shall be defiled withal, and it be hid from him; when he knoweth of it, then he shall be guilty

what the hell is 'uncleaness of man', the bible doesn't say and the SAB doesn't either
Apparently, this is best translated with a pseudo-British accent...

Lev. 5:3 "Or if he rubs the man's filthy bits, whatever filthy bits that might be what gets his bits filthy, and then the other bloke hides his filthy bits; when he figures out he touched the other chap's filthy bits, he'll feel quite the shite after."

you'd think they'd be less vague, after the 9 chapters of 'how to kill livestock for God'
"Nobody ever inferred from the multiple infirmities of Windows that Bill Gates was infinitely benevolent, omniscient, and able to fix everything. " Argument against god's perfection.

My Snow's art portfolio.
Raoul Duke, Jr.
BANNED
Posts: 3791
Joined: 2002-09-25 06:59pm
Location: Suckling At The Teat Of Missmanners

Post by Raoul Duke, Jr. »

Setesh wrote:
Raoul Duke, Jr. wrote:
Setesh wrote:speaking of Leviticus

Lev,5:3
Or if he touch the uncleanness of man, whatsoever uncleanness it be that a man shall be defiled withal, and it be hid from him; when he knoweth of it, then he shall be guilty

what the hell is 'uncleaness of man', the bible doesn't say and the SAB doesn't either
Apparently, this is best translated with a pseudo-British accent...

Lev. 5:3 "Or if he rubs the man's filthy bits, whatever filthy bits that might be what gets his bits filthy, and then the other bloke hides his filthy bits; when he figures out he touched the other chap's filthy bits, he'll feel quite the shite after."

you'd think they'd be less vague, after the 9 chapters of 'how to kill livestock for God'
The Bible tends to be more graphic with gore than with "filthy bits", I've noticed.
Post Reply