More Baptist Bullshit

Psycho Smiley · Post by **Psycho Smiley** » 2003-05-16 08:16pm

OK, not all the baptist retards are confined to the states. I live in Ontario (Canada) and in front of a baptist church under construction reads a sign:

If evolution is true, then why do mothers still only have two hands?

OK, ignorance of what evolution is is one thing, but this is complete and utter bullshit! Words really fail me.

SyntaxVorlon · Post by **SyntaxVorlon** » 2003-05-16 08:21pm

If a girl was born with a third arm to one of the parishoners, the minister would likely smash it with a rock for being and abomination.

Saurencaerthai · Post by **Saurencaerthai** » 2003-05-16 08:30pm

Mothers (in my experiance) tend to be able to perform like they have four.

Psycho Smiley · Post by **Psycho Smiley** » 2003-05-16 08:30pm

Come now, SyntaxVorlon, we can't have anything that even appears to validate that satanic science-cult of evolution, now can we?

[edited because I can't remember to indicate who I'm talking to

]

Post by **LadyTevar** » 2003-05-16 08:31pm

Psycho Smiley wrote:OK, not all the baptist retards are confined to the states. I live in Ontario (Canada) and in front of a baptist church under construction reads a sign:

If evolution is true, then why do mothers still only have two hands?

OK, ignorance of what evolution is is one thing, but this is complete and utter bullshit! Words really fail me.

Please, please tell me it's a SOUTHERN Baptist sect, not my own American Baptist?

Asst. Asst. Lt. Cmdr. Smi · Post by **Asst. Asst. Lt. Cmdr. Smi** » 2003-05-16 08:38pm

I'm thinking it was some sort of joke, but it's still a misconception of evolution. Under that logic, humans should have wings after ages of wanting to fly.

HemlockGrey · Post by **HemlockGrey** » 2003-05-16 08:39pm

Suggested response:

Because it hates you

Psycho Smiley · Post by **Psycho Smiley** » 2003-05-16 08:42pm

Asst. Asst. Lt. Cmdr. Smi wrote:I'm thinking it was some sort of joke....

After the constant barrage of bullshit they post there, I don't think so. This example, however, just had to be shared. I flat out couldn't believe that anyone would put that up, at least so far from the southern States.

Andrew J. · Post by **Andrew J.** » 2003-05-16 10:44pm

That's...that's...what the hell does it have to do with anything?

Joe · Post by **Joe** » 2003-05-16 10:47pm

A better response would be "If Creation is true, then why didn't God design mothers to be able to raise children more efficiently?"

Johonebesus · Post by **Johonebesus** » 2003-05-16 11:46pm

Durran Korr wrote:A better response would be "If Creation is true, then why didn't God design mothers to be able to raise children more efficiently?"

Simple, because God cursed Adam and Eve when He expelled them from Eden. It's in the BIble; read it for yourself.

That's the typical response to any argument against rational design.

Joe · Post by **Joe** » 2003-05-16 11:52pm

Johonebesus wrote:
Durran Korr wrote:A better response would be "If Creation is true, then why didn't God design mothers to be able to raise children more efficiently?"
Simple, because God cursed Adam and Eve when He expelled them from Eden. It's in the BIble; read it for yourself.

That's the typical response to any argument against rational design.

Ah, but pre-Original Sin Eve was no different anatomically than the average modern woman. The only significant difference, IIRC, is that the process of giving birth before Original Sin would be painless (God cursed woman with painful childbirth after the fall). Eve did not have the extra limbs that God should have given to a species that he favored.

Johonebesus · Post by **Johonebesus** » 2003-05-17 12:20am

Durran Korr wrote:Ah, but pre-Original Sin Eve was no different anatomically than the average modern woman. The only significant difference, IIRC, is that the process of giving birth before Original Sin would be painless (God cursed woman with painful childbirth after the fall). Eve did not have the extra limbs that God should have given to a species that he favored.

Oh, but you can't question God's wisdom. Where were you when the world was formed, when the mountains were laid, etc., etc., whatever it says in Job? Since you aren't omniscient, you can't tell what's good and what isn't. Besides, how do you know Eve was anatomically the same as modern humans?

Seriously, there are Christians who would argue that Eve might have had four arms or some such nonsense. Most fundamentalists do not even know the Bible, they only know what their preachers tell them. If you try to approach them with reason, they end up basically sticking their fingers in their ears and singing. "La la, God is omniscient, you aren't, la di da, You can't tell what's best, la li, I'm not listening to the stupid heathen."

Darth Gojira · Post by **Darth Gojira** » 2003-05-17 08:03am

Fundies are a disease..........

Sir Sirius · Post by **Sir Sirius** » 2003-05-17 09:18am

...but fortunately the nice French Doctor Joseph Ignace Guillotin (1738 - 1814) invented the cure quite a while a go.

Darth Gojira · Post by **Darth Gojira** » 2003-05-17 09:21am

Sir Sirius wrote:...but fortunately the nice French Doctor Joseph Ignace Guillotin (1738 - 1814) invented the cure quite a while a go.

*starts playing "Le Marsielle"*

Enricko · Post by **Enricko** » 2003-05-17 11:26am

Can someone explain to me why do we still hear that humans cannot differentiate good from evil? Didn't we ate the fruit already? Did we not became sinful because we now know good from evil?

Wicked Pilot · Post by **Wicked Pilot** » 2003-05-17 12:37pm

If evilution is right, then why don't men have two penises?

DPDarkPrimus · Post by **DPDarkPrimus** » 2003-05-17 12:42pm

Wicked Pilot wrote:If evilution is right, then why don't men have two penises?

Better yet, "If evolution is right, then why don't men have orgasms like women?"

NapoleonGH · Post by **NapoleonGH** » 2003-05-17 01:13pm

DPDarkPrimus wrote: Better yet, "If evolution is right, then why don't men have orgasms like women?"

well you know the only "reason" why women have orgasms at all is because men do. The clitorus only exists so that when the fetus is diffentitated there can be a penis for men. A great essay on this (one of his best) comes from Dr. Stephen Jay Gould, in his collection "Bully for Brontosaurus" it is titled "Of Male Nipples and Clitoral Ripples" (apparently it was originally titled "Tits and Clits" but his wife said that would lead to too much confusion)

DPDarkPrimus · Post by **DPDarkPrimus** » 2003-05-17 02:38pm

NapoleonGH wrote: A great essay on this (one of his best) comes from Dr. Stephen Jay Gould, in his collection "Bully for Brontosaurus" it is titled "Of Male Nipples and Clitoral Ripples" (apparently it was originally titled "Tits and Clits" but his wife said that would lead to too much confusion)

Assuming it's legal, could you link me to a copy of the essay? I've always enjoyed reading Gould.

NapoleonGH · Post by **NapoleonGH** » 2003-05-17 02:47pm

dont have it on net got the book, should be at library near you (copywrite still exists btw)

GC · Post by GC » 2003-05-17 04:31pm

Psycho Smiley wrote:OK, not all the baptist retards are confined to the states. I live in Ontario (Canada) and in front of a baptist church under construction reads a sign:

If evolution is true, then why do mothers still only have two hands?

OK, ignorance of what evolution is is one thing, but this is complete and utter bullshit! Words really fail me.

[Foghorn Leghorn mode]

It's a JOKE son!
Humor!

For laughs, dont'chaknow?

(nice kid but he don't understand a word you say)

Laugh it up, boy!

It's a - I say it's a JOKE son!

[/Foghorn Leghorn mode]

Joe · Post by **Joe** » 2003-05-17 04:54pm

Quiet, troll.

Peregrin Toker · Post by **Peregrin Toker** » 2003-05-17 05:09pm

SyntaxVorlon wrote:If a girl was born with a third arm to one of the parishoners, the minister would likely smash it with a rock for being and abomination.

(Insert Warhammer 40K reference)

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