Prayers

OT: anything goes!

Moderator: Edi

Post Reply
User avatar
Drach
Padawan Learner
Posts: 164
Joined: 2003-05-20 02:53am

Prayers

Post by Drach »

Before I lay me down to sleep,

I pray for a man, who's not a creep,

One who's handsome, smart and strong,

One who loves to listen long,

One who thinks before he speaks,

When he says he'll call, he won't wait weeks.

I pray that he is gainfully employed,

when I spend his cash, he won't be annoyed.

Pulls out my chair and opens my door,

massages my back and begs to do more.

Oh! Send me a man who'll make love to my mind,

and knows what to answer to "How big is my behind?"

I pray that this man will love me to no end,

And never attempt to hit on my friend.

And as I kneel and pray by my bed,

I look at the creep you sent me instead.

Amen.



MALE PRAYER

I pray for a deaf-mute nymphomaniac with huge boobs

who owns a liquor store.

Amen.
User avatar
Batman
Emperor's Hand
Posts: 16450
Joined: 2002-07-09 04:51am
Location: Seriously thinking about moving to Marvel because so much of the DCEU stinks

Post by Batman »

LOL!! Very funny.
'Next time I let Superman take charge, just hit me. Real hard.'
'You're a princess from a society of immortal warriors. I'm a rich kid with issues. Lots of issues.'
'No. No dating for the Batman. It might cut into your brooding time.'
'Tactically we have multiple objectives. So we need to split into teams.'-'Dibs on the Amazon!'
'Hey, we both have a Martian's phone number on our speed dial. I think I deserve the benefit of the doubt.'
'You know, for a guy with like 50 different kinds of vision, you sure are blind.'
User avatar
Gandalf
SD.net White Wizard
Posts: 16367
Joined: 2002-09-16 11:13pm
Location: A video store in Australia

Post by Gandalf »

LOL!
:lol: :lol: :lol:
"Oh no, oh yeah, tell me how can it be so fair
That we dying younger hiding from the police man over there
Just for breathing in the air they wanna leave me in the chair
Electric shocking body rocking beat streeting me to death"

- A.B. Original, Report to the Mist

"I think it’s the duty of the comedian to find out where the line is drawn and cross it deliberately."
- George Carlin
User avatar
Hethrir
Jedi Master
Posts: 1095
Joined: 2003-03-25 05:37am
Location: Brisbane, Australia
Contact:

Post by Hethrir »

Hey! That requested prayer person is me ;)
User avatar
Batman
Emperor's Hand
Posts: 16450
Joined: 2002-07-09 04:51am
Location: Seriously thinking about moving to Marvel because so much of the DCEU stinks

Post by Batman »

Hethrir wrote:Hey! That requested prayer person is me ;)
I wonder what side of the force delusions lead to...
'Next time I let Superman take charge, just hit me. Real hard.'
'You're a princess from a society of immortal warriors. I'm a rich kid with issues. Lots of issues.'
'No. No dating for the Batman. It might cut into your brooding time.'
'Tactically we have multiple objectives. So we need to split into teams.'-'Dibs on the Amazon!'
'Hey, we both have a Martian's phone number on our speed dial. I think I deserve the benefit of the doubt.'
'You know, for a guy with like 50 different kinds of vision, you sure are blind.'
User avatar
Queeb Salaron
Jedi Council Member
Posts: 2337
Joined: 2003-03-12 12:45am
Location: Left of center.

Post by Queeb Salaron »

Hethrir wrote:Hey! That requested prayer person is me ;)
You're a deaf-mute nymphomaniac with huge boobs who owns a liquor store?

You know, I've always loved you...
Proud owner of The Fleshlight
G.A.L.E. Force - Bisexual Airborn Division
SDnet Resident Psycho Clown

"I hear and behold God in every object, yet I understand God not in the least, / Nor do I understand who there can be more wonderful than myself."
--Whitman

Fucking Funny.
Asst. Asst. Lt. Cmdr. Smi
What Kind of Username is That?
Posts: 9254
Joined: 2002-07-10 08:53pm
Location: Back in PA

Post by Asst. Asst. Lt. Cmdr. Smi »

Hey, how did you find out that last prayer? I say it every night!
BotM: Just another monkey|HAB
User avatar
Kuja
The Dark Messenger
Posts: 19322
Joined: 2002-07-11 12:05am
Location: AZ

Post by Kuja »

Snarf! :lol:
Image
JADAFETWA
Post Reply