What do you do?

Post by **haas mark** » 2003-06-06 08:45am

Okay.. last night I got into a huge argument with the Rob, and now I'm tired, as I was treated like I have no emotions whatsoever, and I'm not supposed to care about myself, too. What does one do in this type of situation to "make it all better"? Do I play on his ego? Do I take the blame for something that wasn't really my fault, other than blowing up at him? [sighs] I don't know what to do, or how to resolve it..

~ver

Post by **Gandalf** » 2003-06-06 08:50am

The Rob?

Post by **haas mark** » 2003-06-06 08:56am

Gandalf wrote:The Rob?

The Rob. My Rob.

~ver

Zoink · Post by **Zoink** » 2003-06-06 09:26am

It depends on the individual and what you want happen. I will give my 2 cents if its of any help:

I don't know the situation personally, but some people can't be reasoned with in all situations, and sometimes it might be required to "bite the bullet" for the greater good. ie. I think I am right, but I will accept defeat/concessions/compromise in the interest of ending a conflict, because winning the conflict might not be worth what I lost.

Now although I said that, if you find yourself doing this a lot, its not too healthy. In that case you might want to continue to stick to your guns. Maybe agree to disagree if you can.

Post by **haas mark** » 2003-06-06 09:32am

Zoink wrote:It depends on the individual and what you want happen. I will give my 2 cents if its of any help:

I don't know the situation personally, but some people can't be reasoned with in all situations, and sometimes it might be required to "bite the bullet" for the greater good. ie. I think I am right, but I will accept defeat/concessions/compromise in the interest of ending a conflict, because winning the conflict might not be worth what I lost.

Unfortunately, I think that's probably what I may have to do..

Now although I said that, if you find yourself doing this a lot, its not too healthy. In that case you might want to continue to stick to your guns. Maybe agree to disagree if you can.

[sighs] It's not so much that, as I held a lot of emotional trust in him (a VERY hard thing for me to do, as you'd have noticed, had you been here for a few months..).

~ver

InnerBrat · Post by **InnerBrat** » 2003-06-06 11:12am

You're allowed to ignore me, as this is what I would do as opposed to any actual advice (you know the difference)

I think relationships have to be based on trust, and on a very solid foundation of 'everything really is all right'. So if you're not happy about how you've been treated, you should let him know and have it all blow up in a massive argument as long as you both sway how you feel and both end up knowing what the other wants. Then you can have make up sex.
Unfortunately, I'm not sure how this would work long distance, but I would wirte down everything you feel in a concise but detailed way, read over it to make sure you've said exactly what you really feel and in no way exaggerated, then email him.