Worst songs of all time?

UltraViolence83 · Post by **UltraViolence83** » 2003-06-06 05:12am

"Whooo let the dogs out? Woof! Woof! Woof Woof Woof!"

"If you wannabe my lover..."

"Keep on rollin' rollin' rollin' rollin' ad infinitum"

"With arms wiiiiideee oopoppPPPPEeEeENnnnnEnn..."

Mariah Carey. Her shrill screams cry the banshees to sleep.

Kid Rock. Bad enough trying to be rap as it is, but I just can't stand such self-promotion in songs when there's no substance to back it up. "I'm a cowboy!" Hey, dumbass, you're from Detroit.

Usher. The guy is hideously ugly, in a monkey sort of way. His 5 minute-long song was played on MTV at least twice an hour while I was trying to find some rock videos to record.

Boba Fett · Post by **Boba Fett** » 2003-06-06 05:32am

innerbrat wrote:And If I could Turn Back Time is a great little pop ballad, IMO. So there.

You mean the one from Cher?

I love that song, especially the lyrics because it's very-very rare to hear those words from a woman...

"Too proud to tell you I was sorry..."

Darth Gojira · Post by **Darth Gojira** » 2003-06-06 07:26am

Frank Hipper wrote:This has been done before, but it was so long ago I doubt that anybody'll mind. It's just too fun of a subject.

My vote goes to "MacArthur Park". Nightmarishly bad.

"Someone left the cake out
in the rain....."
*vomits*

"I don't know that I can TAKE it
Cause it took so long to BAKE it,
And I'll never have that recipe againnnnnn"
Oh nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo(X10)"
Dave Barry was right. "MacArthur Park" is definatly on the top 10 pre-90's worst songs. I even have a wave file, for comic value. At least you can parody it. Unlike a pop tune, where you risk having your face smashed in by PO'd classmates.

Peregrin Toker · Post by **Peregrin Toker** » 2003-06-06 09:55am

"Pleasure Slave." ManOwar should be Embarassed with a capital E.

When a song can embarass even ManOwar, probably the cheesiest band in existance, you know it's bad.

Post by **haas mark** » 2003-06-06 09:59am

This song (dunno by whom) that the only words are, "I'm getting closer to my home."

~ver

Peregrin Toker · Post by **Peregrin Toker** » 2003-06-06 10:04am

By the way, I'm sure that pretty much anything by Westlife or similar groups are in the running for "worst songs ever."

InnerBrat · Post by **InnerBrat** » 2003-06-06 10:39am

Boba Fett wrote:
innerbrat wrote:And If I could Turn Back Time is a great little pop ballad, IMO. So there.
You mean the one from Cher?

I love that song, especially the lyrics because it's very-very rare to hear those words from a woman...

"Too proud to tell you I was sorry..."

No, the Aqua song. Why would I mention a Cher song in a post defendig Aqua?

If only I could turn back time
If only I could say what I still hide

With the video on the Tube.

Post by **Vympel** » 2003-06-06 12:37pm

Anything by Silverchair. Meaningless gibberish masquerading as poetry, that tripe is.

Post by **Dalton** » 2003-06-06 12:58pm

There aren't any particular songs that I really hate.

Peregrin Toker · Post by **Peregrin Toker** » 2003-06-06 03:08pm

Vympel wrote:Anything by Silverchair. Meaningless gibberish masquerading as poetry, that tripe is.

Silverchair, though their music is quite bland, is tolerable. No, there's far worse music out there!

Lord Pounder · Post by **Lord Pounder** » 2003-06-06 03:37pm

Damaramu wrote:OH, remember this fucking piece of aural shit?

LFO - Summer Girls
New Kids on the Block had a Bunch of Hits
Chinese Food Makes Me Sick
And I think its fly when girls stop by for the summer (for the summer)
I Like girls that wear Abercrombie and Fitch
I'd take her if I had one wish
But she's been gone since that Summer

Eminem did i good piss take on that on the track "I'm Just Marshall Mathers"

New kids on the block sucked a bunch of dicks,
Boy girl groups make me sick,
and i can't wait till i see all you faggots in public,
I'm gonna love it.

Hate the man, love them lyrics.

thecreech · Post by **thecreech** » 2003-06-06 03:42pm

Oh also another song i hate is by the talentless hack nelly, The song that goes "mama mama e i e i uh ho". Damn that song sucks nuts. All of his songs do

Lord Pounder · Post by **Lord Pounder** » 2003-06-06 03:46pm

Ali G's Me Julie just got on my nipple nuts. I hate that guy and i hate that song. Reverse Racism is NOT OK.

Asst. Asst. Lt. Cmdr. Smi · Post by **Asst. Asst. Lt. Cmdr. Smi** » 2003-06-06 05:51pm

Damaramu wrote:OH, remember this fucking piece of aural shit?

LFO - Summer Girls
New Kids on the Block had a Bunch of Hits
Chinese Food Makes Me Sick
And I think its fly when girls stop by for the summer (for the summer)
I Like girls that wear Abercrombie and Fitch
I'd take her if I had one wish
But she's been gone since that Summer

Dumbest. Lyrics. Ever.

Seriously, I have random thoughts more coherent than those lyrics.

As for bad songs, I'll get specific:

"One Step Closer"- Linkin Park- It's just overall obnoxiously loud. My ears hurt.

"Obsession"- Papa Roach- The overall vocals and music itself both stink (Even more so than "One Step Closer"), and the song trying to make up for it by making every other word "Fuck", or "Shit" doesn't help. Papa Roach should be fumigated for it.

That song by Ashanti- Sure, it wasn't that bad the first 200 times, but being one of the most overplayed songs of it's time brought it down to this level.

One of the songs from Ludacris- They weren't all that talented and creative to begin with, but the song in question made all their other work sound decent. I mean, who wouldn't beg for something else to play when they got to the annoyingly high howling and dumb lyrics?

What makes a bad song? In my opinion, there are 4 factors.

Frequency of being played- Even a good song can be hated by people if it's played too much by the radio stations. Once you hear it too much, then it gets on your nerves.

Vocals- The melody of a song can sound good, but be destroyed completely when you have some talentless hack with a grating voice singing. In my opinion, Creed's music would be decent if someone that didn't sound like they were gurgling water was singing.

The music itself- Lots of songs have melodies that sound really bad (And even worse, some get stuck in your head). They can either lack rhythym, or be extremely obnoxius with the notes chosen.

Lyrics- Not as big as a factor as the other three, but dumb, nonsensical, or whiny lyrics can bring a song down.

IRG CommandoJoe · Post by **IRG CommandoJoe** » 2003-06-06 08:34pm

Darth Pounder wrote:Ali G's Me Julie just got on my nipple nuts. I hate that guy and i hate that song. Reverse Racism is NOT OK.

Why bother even calling it reverse racism? It should just be called racism, right?

Peregrin Toker · Post by **Peregrin Toker** » 2003-06-07 01:25pm

IRG CommandoJoe wrote:
Darth Pounder wrote:Ali G's Me Julie just got on my nipple nuts. I hate that guy and i hate that song. Reverse Racism is NOT OK.
Why bother even calling it reverse racism? It should just be called racism, right?

I've never even heard of that song, but how is it "reverse racist"??

Lord Pounder · Post by **Lord Pounder** » 2003-06-07 04:20pm

Simon H.Johansen wrote:
IRG CommandoJoe wrote:
Darth Pounder wrote:Ali G's Me Julie just got on my nipple nuts. I hate that guy and i hate that song. Reverse Racism is NOT OK.
Why bother even calling it reverse racism? It should just be called racism, right?
I've never even heard of that song, but how is it "reverse racist"??

A Jewish guy dressed as a black guy mouthing off to and insulting white people. His catch phrase is Boayakasha which i was told is swahili for "death to whites" though i may be wrong on the last part.

Peregrin Toker · Post by **Peregrin Toker** » 2003-06-07 05:02pm

Darth Pounder wrote:
Simon H.Johansen wrote:
IRG CommandoJoe wrote: Why bother even calling it reverse racism? It should just be called racism, right?
I've never even heard of that song, but how is it "reverse racist"??
A Jewish guy dressed as a black guy mouthing off to and insulting white people. His catch phrase is Boayakasha which i was told is swahili for "death to whites" though i may be wrong on the last part.

That's pretty tame compared to all those Nazi Metal bands from Eastern Europe.

Einhander Sn0m4n · Post by **Einhander Sn0m4n** » 2003-06-07 05:46pm

theheap wrote:Oh also another song i hate is by the talentless hack nelly, The song that goes "mama mama e i e i uh ho". Damn that song sucks nuts. All of his songs do

AAGGHH!!! I FORGOT ABOUT NELLY!!!

Where the fuck is my shotgun!?

Peregrin Toker · Post by **Peregrin Toker** » 2003-06-08 03:19am

Einhander Sn0m4n wrote:Where the fuck is my shotgun!?

Can't you just use your railgun instead?

Lord Pounder · Post by **Lord Pounder** » 2003-06-08 06:39pm

Anything by S Club 7. I can look at them all day. Rachel and Bradley are my dream 3-some but really they are the worst group ever.

Post by **haas mark** » 2003-06-08 10:19pm

Vympel wrote:Anything by Silverchair. Meaningless gibberish masquerading as poetry, that tripe is.

~ver

Montcalm · Post by **Montcalm** » 2003-06-08 10:26pm

Everything by Celine Dion,even her early french ones.

Hethrir · Post by **Hethrir** » 2003-06-09 12:31am

Darth Pounder wrote:Ali G's Me Julie just got on my nipple nuts. I hate that guy and i hate that song. Reverse Racism is NOT OK.

Ali G is teh funny!

I take it you are from US? It seems you do not share the same humour as the rest of the world.

Einhander Sn0m4n · Post by **Einhander Sn0m4n** » 2003-06-09 01:41am

Simon H.Johansen wrote:
Einhander Sn0m4n wrote:Where the fuck is my shotgun!?

Can't you just use your railgun instead?

Sometimes I get in the mood for some Point-Blank-Range In-Your-Face Splatterpunk Gibbage...