Damnit, now I"m a redneck officially...

[MKSheppard]

Half the cars outside our house don't work for some reason or another...

now all I need is a bunch of cinderblocks

*gets up to go push a car out of the driveway*

[Montcalm]

bringing a keg and start celebrating "HEE HAW" BANG BANG.

[Admiral Valdemar]

Rocking chair + shotgun + chewing straw = teh sh1t.

[Crayz9000]

Half the cars outside our house don't work for some reason or another...

now all I need is a bunch of cinderblocks

*gets up to go push a car out of the driveway*

Think you've got it bad? We have around 8 cars, only three of which are currently in driveable status. The others run, but all have something that needs fixing before they can be driven again... a truck with an annoying radiator leak, an Olds Starfire with a power steering hose that needs changing, a station wagon that needs an engine change, a motorhome with half the interior torn out...

However, we don't use cinderblocks. Too dangerous

[TrailerParkJawa]

You are an uber redneck if one of those cars is brown with and orange door or hood.

[Crayz9000]

Well, we still need to repaint the hood of one of our trucks. It's yellow, the truck is blue...

Although it doesn't look quite as bad as some cars I've seen here in the LA area. I mean, I've seen cars where almost every body panel is from a different car...

[Sea Skimmer]

*gets up to go push a car out of the driveway*

Onto your lawn?

[Dalton]

*gets up to go push a car out of the driveway*

Onto your lawn?

Well, he does have to make enough room to roll his house down to the street.

[Vympel]

We have five cars which all function perfectly. The fact that the house is waterfront and we have a boatshed obviously excludes me from redneck status of any kind. Life is good.

[MKSheppard]

Well, he does have to make enough room to roll his house down to the street.

That'd be hard seeing as our house is a fixed structure with a basement

But anyway, that was fucking funny Dalton, LOL

[Ghost Rider]

Now alls ya gotta do is get some roadkill vittles.

And living in an apartment sorta precludes the whole redneck bit...though I'm sure I can acquire the arsenal in short order(just go out on midnight rummaging)

[MKSheppard]

Co4rrection, just fixed the car, whee!

Stupid mother doesn't realize that when you jump start a dead car,
you connect the NEGATIVE jumper to the dead car's engine block,
not the negative terminal on the dead car

[NeoGoomba]

I was a redneck for a good half hour once. My old TV blew, and I grabbed the 27 inch from the basement and put it on top of my old one. After I while I realized what I had done and threw the broken one away. I never felt so low in my life...

[Dalton]

Well, he does have to make enough room to roll his house down to the street.

That'd be hard seeing as our house is a fixed structure with a basement

But anyway, that was fucking funny Dalton, LOL

Hyuck hyuck.

[Jaris Merc]

Ok I have in my yard-
5 Trucks
1 large trailer for hauling the tractor and heavy euipment * such as 105 mm howitzer j/k*
1 small work trailer
1 small tilt trailer
1 Air boat
1 John Boat
A pile of fence boards
2 sheds full of god knows what

Pets-
2 mutt dogs one part coyote named Rosco * which we captured wild and still is kindive* coyote dog is father or whatever to second dog named Honey got bit in the head at a a early age which caused that dog to be stupid and have a eating disorder... but the messed up dog likes to hunt and kill stuff!

1 cat... used to have 2 but MY parents backed over the old one.... the living cat is named Moose the dead one was named Shit Head * no kidding*

What will always be found in my back yard at all times-

at LEAST 20 dollars worth of brass ammo casings for 22 LR, 9*18 Makrov, 44 Mag., and probly a .270 case or two.... at least 2 dead squirrels and a rat or various pieces of birds * we have a bird feeder to bait them up so the dogs can catch them* ......
Last week the dogs captured a possum * sp* and ate its guts but left the rest... which after 2 days smelled really bad... So i walk into the back yard and look over and theres these vultures in our neighbors tree looking in our yard... so im like WTF... All of a sudden one of the vultures swoops down to land and out of no where my freaking coyote dog leaps out from hiding and is biting at the buzzard while both the dog and buzzard * vulture* are in the air ...... the vulture pulls up in time and the dog missed * thank god* and i didnt have to wash any buzzard puke off the dog and didnt have to bury any thing.



Well If im not a red neck... I dont know what is.... Well wait can comp nerds and SW nerds be red necks.... * wonders*


We will never know....

[Asst. Asst. Lt. Cmdr. Smi]

You're not a true redneck until you give up on the cars, push them onto your lawn to let them rust, and use them as guest cottages.

[Mutant Headcrab]

All you need really is a bugzapper and a six pack. Tell me you wouldn't happen to have any dogs that are of the hound or mongrel variety, would you?

[Lonestar]

You and a relative need to sit on the porch playing "Duelling Banjos".

[The Yosemite Bear]

Co4rrection, just fixed the car, whee!

Stupid mother doesn't realize that when you jump start a dead car,
you connect the NEGATIVE jumper to the dead car's engine block,
not the negative terminal on the dead car

That's OK I know from a press confrence in '92 that neighter does our president.

[Asst. Asst. Lt. Cmdr. Smi]

You and a relative need to sit on the porch playing "Duelling Banjos".

And they need to be married, of course.

[Andrew J.]

You're only a redneck just now? Hell, I thought Jeff Foxworthy got all of his material by watching you!

[TrailerParkJawa]

Just curious, but for those of you with run down cars in your house, are there no rules against this in your community. Ive noticed in the new housing developments, there are rules that you cant have an unworking car in the street. Some dont even let you have it in the driveway. I can understand the street, the the driveway seems excessive. Anyway, its pretty common. Some areas are reasonable, my old neighborhood was reasonable. As long as the car was well maintained (ie no wires hanging out, dents, etc ) nobody would bug you. But my friends fricking house was insane. If you park a car on the street for 3 consecutive days they would tow it.

[Gandalf]

Is your name, or the name of any of you close friends, Jed?

[Robert Treder]

By the vehicle criteria, I'm the opposite of a redneck.

My family has three vehicles, none of them American-made (BMW, Subaru, Toyota). Furthermore, they are all in working condition, are clean, and we don't know how they work or how to fix them. The situation is the very antithesis of redneckity.

[TrailerParkJawa]

By the vehicle criteria, I'm the opposite of a redneck.

My family has three vehicles, none of them American-made (BMW, Subaru, Toyota). Furthermore, they are all in working condition, are clean, and we don't know how they work or how to fix them. The situation is the very antithesis of redneckity.

If this was the 1980's Id call your family Yuppies!