design a religion

Singular Quartet · Post by **Singular Quartet** » 2003-06-13 10:23pm

Actaully, there already is a Church of the Machine. Their members are called the Gundamned, and they worship Gundam models.

As to a religion I would design... hmm...

Can't really think of one. If I was hard pressed, I'd probably base it around Lovecraftian mythos or the Chaos gods, and lead crusades against whoever happened to be around.

Lonestar · Post by **Lonestar** » 2003-06-13 10:36pm

Okay, check this out. How about the Cult of the Nice Guy(tm). Although nominally the Nice Guy(tm) will be God's son, his primary message is that people should be good neighbors. He continues this message until the Italians make a martyr of him by stapling him to a tree.

Well?

Sindai · Post by **Sindai** » 2003-06-13 11:13pm

Simon H.Johansen wrote:
Darth Wong wrote:The church of Me, where everyone must give 10% of their income to Me.
L. Ron Hubbard already made his own version of that. It's called "Scientology".

Nah, Wong is letting his followers off lightly compared to Hubbard.

darthdavid · Post by **darthdavid** » 2003-06-13 11:30pm

The curch of running into walls

(affter my followers pass out from a vigorous worship session they'll be making a hefty non-voluntary donation to the church)

SpacedTeddyBear · Post by **SpacedTeddyBear** » 2003-06-14 12:16am

Money is the ultimate religion. We spend a majority of our lives trying to earn more and more of it. Unlike god that requires you to take one measly day of the week off to worship him, Money requires you to spend as much time as you possibly can to earn it. Money provides food, clothes, the roof over your head, the nessesities (Sp?) in life, the luxuries in life and etc. And like any other religion, people kill for it, they do stupid things for it. Plus there is no universal definition of what money means, so most likely there will be conflict to what is the true form of money.

Lets take a look at U.S currency. You have
Ben Franklin $100 bill. The Almighty one.
Ulysses S. Grant $50 bill. Franklin's bitch in tow.
Andrew Jackson $20 bill. The most popular of all the gods. Champion of the white collar people.
Then you have Johnson and Lincoln $10 and $5 bills respectively. Haven't thought of anything for them.
And finally we have good ol George Washington for the $1 bill. God of strippers.

SirNitram · Post by **SirNitram** » 2003-06-14 12:20am

Obviously, I need add nothing to this thread except myself, as I already have a small religion based around me.

Post by **weemadando** » 2003-06-14 12:35am

Lonestar wrote:Okay, check this out. How about the Cult of the Nice Guy(tm). Although nominally the Nice Guy(tm) will be God's son, his primary message is that people should be good neighbors. He continues this message until the Italians make a martyr of him by stapling him to a tree.

Well?

Scarily enough this varient without any knowledge of world events sounds the least likely to succeed. I mean, the entire premise is just stupid!

Peregrin Toker · Post by **Peregrin Toker** » 2003-06-14 01:04am

BTW, what about the Cult of the Kitten?

Brother-Captain Gaius · Post by **Brother-Captain Gaius** » 2003-06-14 02:55am

I designed a religion, about a year ago. I forget exactly what we called it, but basically I was the divine authority in our material world as DM. There were quite a few rules and regulations, and our holy water was the blessed Mountain Dew, for it brings life.

Dogma:
Never look over the Most Holy DM Screen, for thou shall burn in the fires of the Abyss if thy gaze should wander.
Never touch, nor look upon, the Most Holy Guardian of the Most Holy DM Screen, and all within its dominion. The Guardian shall be rotated as pertaining to the whims of the Most Holy DM. All shall pay homage to thy First Holy Guardian of thy Domain, thy "AH-64D Apache Longbow model". Forever may it remain blessed, pay no heed to the Demons of Cat, for though they destroy That Which Is Holy, they may never destroy Its Magnificent Aura of "DONT FUCKING TOUCH THE DM SCREEN".
Revere thy Most Holy DM, for His Will is supreme, and His Judgement ever virtuous.
Revere thy Most Holy Mountain Dew, for it brings Life, and purges thy soul of the impurities of the School.
Never shall one fake thy die roll, nor shall one ever cheat in such a fashion, for the DM sees all, and Eternal Death shall be swift.

The Duchess of Zeon · Post by **The Duchess of Zeon** » 2003-06-14 05:11am

A Neo-Stoic Philosophy. Particularly if it was a State "religion" for a country I ruled.

Darth Yoshi · Post by **Darth Yoshi** » 2003-06-14 06:35pm

How, pray tell, does one join the Cult of the Kitten?

Declare that there is some powerful force in charge of the universe
Unfortunately, this "Force™" is not all powerful or all knowing
That's where we come in. As avatars of this "Force™," we are in charge of seeking knowledge, and sharing it with the universe
Every 3rd day, we get to cut back and relax as long as no damage--psychological, physical, or property wise--occurs as a result

Post by **Alyrium Denryle** » 2003-06-14 06:46pm

SirNitram wrote:Obviously, I need add nothing to this thread except myself, as I already have a small religion based around me.

All shall give praise to my master. The WONG is dreat, the DURANDAL is great, but the NITRAM is also great, and shall lay waste upon the magically barren, save those who honor him.

Yogi · Post by **Yogi** » 2003-06-15 03:29am

Personally, Zen Bhuddism looks fine the way it is. Be nice to other people, and that is good. Oh, and being too greedy is never good.

That, or dedicate a church to Charlene Masuhara, my High School Guidance and Career Counceler. She has made more miracles than all the world's religons combined.

Soulman · Post by **Soulman** » 2003-06-15 09:32am

Maybe one of us could setup a nice website and see if we can get many believers, then once we have at least a few thousand declare it all to be a joke, write a book about it and have some interviews on TV. It would be kick-ass.