Sex in the holodeck = jiz on the floor later?

Eleas · Post by **Eleas** » 2003-06-27 09:00am

neoolong wrote:
Eleas wrote:
neoolong wrote: Because holodecks also use replicators.
So you mean if you're used as a target for bukkake, you'll still have the topping when you get on the bridge?
Only if semen is replicated.

Ah, the wonders of modern technology. Holoporn - where no man has come before!

Superman · Post by **Superman** » 2003-06-27 09:03am

I have one for you. How did Data take that piece of paper that Moriarty drew on out of the holodeck? Remember that?

I once read that was a mistake and that they changed the ending.

neoolong · Post by **neoolong** » 2003-06-27 12:30pm

Superman wrote:I have one for you. How did Data take that piece of paper that Moriarty drew on out of the holodeck? Remember that?

I once read that was a mistake and that they changed the ending.

Uh, that was replicated also.

I don't think that anything that we see come out of the holodeck was really complex enough to not have been replicated.

XaLEv · Post by **XaLEv** » 2003-06-27 06:52pm

<RogueIce> SD.Net on a Fed ship? *shudder*
<Mitth`raw`nuruodo> lol
<RogueIce> And Sex in the holodeck? Craziness...
<Mitth`raw`nuruodo> buttons would explode at random times
<XaLEv> do starfleet holowhores have holographic pink foam?

Mitth`raw`nuruodo · Post by **Mitth`raw`nuruodo** » 2003-06-27 08:19pm

XaLEv wrote:<RogueIce> SD.Net on a Fed ship? *shudder*
<Mitth`raw`nuruodo> lol
<RogueIce> And Sex in the holodeck? Craziness...
<Mitth`raw`nuruodo> buttons would explode at random times
<XaLEv> do starfleet holowhores have holographic pink foam?

/me prepares to repost that entire conversation

Jeremy · Post by **Jeremy** » 2003-06-27 09:51pm

(that squirming wormy shit)

You mean Wesley?

Raoul Duke, Jr. · Post by **Raoul Duke, Jr.** » 2003-06-28 01:07am

Wait a minute, similar question, different angle:

You know, when they run the Dixon Hill simulations, they have to crap (when they have to crap) in toilets.

Now, obviously, it doesn't go very far through pipes before it gets dematerialized, broken down into base components and stored -- but where do you suppose it gets stored? The replicator system, or the Holodeck?

Can Starfleet computers discriminate between stock matter and human feces? Who had the happy job of programming that capability into the computers?

neoolong · Post by **neoolong** » 2003-06-28 01:28am

Raoul Duke, Jr. wrote:Wait a minute, similar question, different angle:

You know, when they run the Dixon Hill simulations, they have to crap (when they have to crap) in toilets.

Now, obviously, it doesn't go very far through pipes before it gets dematerialized, broken down into base components and stored -- but where do you suppose it gets stored? The replicator system, or the Holodeck?

Can Starfleet computers discriminate between stock matter and human feces? Who had the happy job of programming that capability into the computers?

I believe that it was established in Enterprise that fecal matter was reused.

Trip mentioning something about making shoes or something with it.

Raoul Duke, Jr. · Post by **Raoul Duke, Jr.** » 2003-06-28 02:09am

neoolong wrote:
Raoul Duke, Jr. wrote:Wait a minute, similar question, different angle:

You know, when they run the Dixon Hill simulations, they have to crap (when they have to crap) in toilets.

Now, obviously, it doesn't go very far through pipes before it gets dematerialized, broken down into base components and stored -- but where do you suppose it gets stored? The replicator system, or the Holodeck?

Can Starfleet computers discriminate between stock matter and human feces? Who had the happy job of programming that capability into the computers?
I believe that it was established in Enterprise that fecal matter was reused.

Trip mentioning something about making shoes or something with it.

Well, yeah, I knew about the whole food to shite to shoes system. My question is, how does the computer retrieve poo from the holodeck and get it to the right system to make table napkins out of it again?

Superman · Post by **Superman** » 2003-06-28 02:25am

In that case, the Voyager computer should have recycled the crew and ship itself... Since it is all shit, too!

neoolong · Post by **neoolong** » 2003-06-28 04:14am

Raoul Duke, Jr. wrote:Well, yeah, I knew about the whole food to shite to shoes system. My question is, how does the computer retrieve poo from the holodeck and get it to the right system to make table napkins out of it again?

Probably transporters. Just site to site transport it to the rest of the raw material to be used for replication.

Dooey Jo · Post by **Dooey Jo** » 2003-06-28 11:14am

Well, they probably sends the cum into subspace. Nice and clean. Could get horrible sideeffects, though. Just imagine what could happen if you used a cum-filled subspace for communication

. Or if they created a rift in subspace so everything comes out into normal space...

Raoul Duke, Jr. · Post by **Raoul Duke, Jr.** » 2003-06-28 12:10pm

Dooey Jo wrote:Well, they probably sends the cum into subspace. Nice and clean. Could get horrible sideeffects, though. Just imagine what could happen if you used a cum-filled subspace for communication . Or if they created a rift in subspace so everything comes out into normal space...

"Captain, sensors are picking up a... eww."
"What is it, Ensign!"
"Um... nothing, Captain."

Bug-Eyed Earl · Post by **Bug-Eyed Earl** » 2003-06-30 03:31am

FUTURE RANDAL: Want to know how much the average jizz mopper makes an hour?
FUTURE DANTE: What's a jizz mopper?
FUTURE RANDAL: Ever been in a holodeck?
FUTURE DANTE: Well, yeah.
FUTURE RANDAL: Ever done the bang-bang with a holo-chick?
FUTURE DANTE: Can't say I have.
FUTURE RANDAL: The great thing about it is you can fuck, fuck, and fuck some more and you don't even need a rubber. But after the program's over, the baby paste falls on the floor in a big sticky puddle. It's the jizz-mopper's job to clean it up. It's even worse idf they do it in hot water- what's left looks like egg-drop soup.
FUTURE DANTE: Can we not talk about this now?
FUTURE RANDAL: But do't you want to know how much a jizz-mopper makes?
FUTURE DANTE: They don't, because we live in a neo-communist state. They don't get paid, just like we don't get paid- humanity has "Evolved" beyond the need for money.
FUTURE RANDAL: Oh, right. (Beat) Makes me even happier I'm not a jizz-mopper.

Uraniun235 · Post by **Uraniun235** » 2003-06-30 05:48pm

Wouldn't that be something else they'd use things like the EMH Mark 1 for?

Solid Snake · Post by **Solid Snake** » 2003-06-30 06:37pm

Computer! Activate ESH mark VII!

Eleas · Post by **Eleas** » 2003-07-01 12:42am

SolidSnake wrote:Computer! Activate ESH mark VII!

"Please state the nature of the sexual emergency."
"...but... you're bald!"
"Why, thank you. I do shave regularly."
"Get away from me, you photonic freak!"

Jawawithagun · Post by **Jawawithagun** » 2003-07-01 06:03am

Raoul Duke, Jr. wrote: Can Starfleet computers discriminate between stock matter and human feces? Who had the happy job of programming that capability into the computers?

And who had the even happier job of Beta-Testing it?

YT300000 · Post by **YT300000** » 2003-07-01 12:14pm

Eleas wrote:
SolidSnake wrote:Computer! Activate ESH mark VII!
"Please state the nature of the sexual emergency."
"...but... you're bald!"
"Why, thank you. I do shave regularly."
"Get away from me, you photonic freak!"

I recommend 20 cc's of hard porn.

Baron Mordo · Post by **Baron Mordo** » 2003-07-01 12:24pm

Raoul Duke, Jr. wrote: Can Starfleet computers discriminate between stock matter and human feces?

Nope. But don't worry, it'll all come out in the wash.

EmperorMing · Post by **EmperorMing** » 2003-07-02 12:38am

Bug-Eyed Earl wrote: ...
FUTURE RANDAL: The great thing about it is you can fuck, fuck, and fuck some more and you don't even need a rubber. But after the program's over, the baby paste falls on the floor in a big sticky puddle. It's the jizz-mopper's job to clean it up. It's even worse idf they do it in hot water- what's left looks like egg-drop soup.
....

Egg drop soup?

Where's the barf smiley...!
So much for my dinner...

Raoul Duke, Jr. · Post by **Raoul Duke, Jr.** » 2003-07-02 02:48am

Baron Mordo wrote:
Raoul Duke, Jr. wrote: Can Starfleet computers discriminate between stock matter and human feces?
Nope. But don't worry, it'll all come out in the wash.

Don't you mean, 'It'll all come out as the wash"?

Raoul Duke, Jr. · Post by **Raoul Duke, Jr.** » 2003-07-02 02:50am

"Please state the nature of the janitorial emergency."
*plop*

"Ah. I see."

Death from the Sea · Post by **Death from the Sea** » 2003-07-08 03:10pm

Raoul Duke, Jr. wrote:"Please state the nature of the janitorial emergency."
*plop*

"Ah. I see."

hey that is stereo typing! not all holographic people perform menial jobs, some of them guilt trip their captain into giving them rights and privileges of real people

Raoul Duke, Jr. · Post by **Raoul Duke, Jr.** » 2003-07-08 03:52pm

Hologram abuse...

"Please state the--"
*plop*
"Ugh. Please state the nature of the--"
*plop*
"Stop it, can't you!"
*plop*