Taking a Dump at other peoples houses

YT300000 · Post by **YT300000** » 2003-07-11 07:44pm

Wicked Pilot wrote:I went through three years of middle school, and four years of high school without ever taking a dump in the public restrooms. Somebody give me a medal!

Ha! In my entire life, I have never had a shit outside of my house! Even back when I was in daipers!

thecreech · Post by **thecreech** » 2003-07-11 07:51pm

YT300000 wrote:
Wicked Pilot wrote:I went through three years of middle school, and four years of high school without ever taking a dump in the public restrooms. Somebody give me a medal!
Ha! In my entire life, I have never had a shit outside of my house! Even back when I was in daipers!

So you have never gone out of state on a road trip or had to go to another city?

YT300000 · Post by **YT300000** » 2003-07-11 07:53pm

thecreech wrote:So you have never gone out of state on a road trip or had to go to another city?

That is the sad truth.

thecreech · Post by **thecreech** » 2003-07-11 07:58pm

YT300000 wrote:
thecreech wrote:So you have never gone out of state on a road trip or had to go to another city?
That is the sad truth.

Wow you have never been outside your city! Dude get out and take a road trip

Galvatron · Post by **Galvatron** » 2003-07-12 04:00pm

YT300000 wrote:Ha! In my entire life, I have never had a shit outside of my house! Even back when I was in daipers!

Learn to shit away from home. It's quite liberating.

Xenophobe3691 · Post by **Xenophobe3691** » 2003-07-12 04:59pm

YT300000 wrote:
thecreech wrote:So you have never gone out of state on a road trip or had to go to another city?
That is the sad truth.

Wow...that's a totally different life than mine.

First time I shat outside the home? I don't know, I don't remember that far back

Post by **Darth Wong** » 2003-07-12 07:32pm

The idea of someone being shackled to a small radius around his home by a fear of public restrooms strikes me as uniquely ludicrous.

YT300000 · Post by **YT300000** » 2003-07-12 08:12pm

Darth Wong wrote:The idea of someone being shackled to a small radius around his home by a fear of public restrooms strikes me as uniquely ludicrous.

Not fear of washrooms, its just I've never been away from my house for more than a week.

I went to camp for a week, and I just somehow couldn't pick a crap. I don't know why.

Rye · Post by **Rye** » 2003-07-12 08:14pm

Darth Wong wrote:The idea of someone being shackled to a small radius around his home by a fear of public restrooms strikes me as uniquely ludicrous.

You wouldn't if you've ever visited Bolton. See desperado and Trainspotting toilets for references.

Post by **Darth Wong** » 2003-07-12 08:17pm

Rye wrote:
Darth Wong wrote:The idea of someone being shackled to a small radius around his home by a fear of public restrooms strikes me as uniquely ludicrous.
You wouldn't if you've ever visited Bolton. See desperado and Trainspotting toilets for references.

Then go into a group of trees, squat, and bring toilet paper with you. Human beings didn't evolve with toilets, you know.

Post by **Darth Wong** » 2003-07-12 08:18pm

YT300000 wrote:
Darth Wong wrote:The idea of someone being shackled to a small radius around his home by a fear of public restrooms strikes me as uniquely ludicrous.
Not fear of washrooms, its just I've never been away from my house for more than a week.

I went to camp for a week, and I just somehow couldn't pick a crap. I don't know why.

If you've gone a week without taking a shit, you should see a doctor because something's wrong with you.

YT300000 · Post by **YT300000** » 2003-07-12 08:20pm

Darth Wong wrote:If you've gone a week without taking a shit, you should see a doctor because something's wrong with you.

Turned out the food had something in it, like Imodium. No one in the whole building used the toilets that week.

Post by **Darth Wong** » 2003-07-12 08:51pm

YT300000 wrote:
Darth Wong wrote:If you've gone a week without taking a shit, you should see a doctor because something's wrong with you.
Turned out the food had something in it, like Imodium. No one in the whole building used the toilets that week.

They drugged your food without telling you? That is highly unethical. What if someone there had a negative reaction to the stuff?

YT300000 · Post by **YT300000** » 2003-07-12 10:50pm

Darth Wong wrote:
YT300000 wrote:
Darth Wong wrote:If you've gone a week without taking a shit, you should see a doctor because something's wrong with you.
Turned out the food had something in it, like Imodium. No one in the whole building used the toilets that week.
They drugged your food without telling you? That is highly unethical. What if someone there had a negative reaction to the stuff?

No, it was some natural ingredient in the food. And all our Acknowledgement Of Risk forms said that no one had allergies.

Arthur_Tuxedo · Post by **Arthur_Tuxedo** » 2003-07-13 12:34am

YT300000 wrote:No, it was some natural ingredient in the food. And all our Acknowledgement Of Risk forms said that no one had allergies.

Well Jesus Christ! What if they were allergic and didn't know it? I didn't know I was allergic to Bactrum until I was in the emergency room with liver damage.

Lord Poe · Post by **Lord Poe** » 2003-07-13 11:58pm

Ok, heres a few "tails" of my fecal follies....

When you're a 400 pound Wookiee like I am, you scope out the handicapped stall. Because the other stall doors open IN, so you almost have to stand on the toilet to get out. And forget about having any ROOM to clean up if you don't kick Wally Wheelchair out of the big stall.

Man, I WISH I could use my own bathroom. 90% of the time, I'm at work or my fiancee's house when I've gotta bomb Hanoi. When I AM at home, I use matches. Sorry, but nothing smells worse to me than the aroma of potpourri and asspipe.

I have a ritual when using bathrooms away from home, which has been learned through many years of embarassing trial and error.

1) Check to see if the stall is clean.

2) Check to see if the stall has toilet paper.

3) Check to see if the toilet flushes, and doesn't stop up.

Then you paper the toilet like its a paper-mache project, along WITH the butt-shield. As you are dropping off your first passenger, employ the Mercy Flush.

The Mercy Flush is that social courtesy that you engage in so your stink doesn't flatten the next unfortunate victim to walk into the bathroom. This is also why you must test-flush the toilet beforehand. You don't want your turds kissing your behind as the stopped up toilet water rises while you're sitting down.

Galvatron · Post by **Galvatron** » 2003-07-14 12:01pm

I don't see what the big hang-up is. If I have to shit in the morning, I hold it until I get to work so I can "drop the kids off at the pool" on the company's dime.

aphexmonster · Post by **aphexmonster** » 2003-07-14 04:06pm

haha, im hella late with this, but hell no i couldn't do it xD ... i hate being polite or something. Whatever it is

Superman · Post by **Superman** » 2003-07-14 05:43pm

It's almost like some people seem to think that taking a dump is a sacred ritual that can only be performed in the temple of their bathroom at home. Jeez people! It's taking a crap not sacrificing a virgin to the porcelain gods!

Anyway, I can leave a loaf anywhere. Once I left a pile on the doorstep of my classroom at school. It was when I was in fifth grade. I went there at night, dropped trou and took a dump right on the doorstep. That showed that teacher! That's what she gets for giving me a C!

Post by **RogueIce** » 2003-07-14 05:51pm

Superman wrote:It's almost like some people seem to think that taking a dump is a sacred ritual that can only be performed in the temple of their bathroom at home. Jeez people! It's taking a crap not sacrificing a virgin to the porcelain gods!

*unties the virgin and releases the plunger*

Whoops.

Superman wrote:Anyway, I can leave a loaf anywhere. Once I left a pile on the doorstep of my classroom at school. It was when I was in fifth grade. I went there at night, dropped trou and took a dump right on the doorstep. That showed that teacher! That's what she gets for giving me a C!

That's, um...great. Good for you!

Mitth`raw`nuruodo · Post by **Mitth`raw`nuruodo** » 2003-07-14 05:53pm

Hrm, has anyone ever went to fart, but have it come out being something that's ...maybe just a little more? If so, has it ever come out a liquid? That happened to me recently. It was like i was taking a piss out of my butthole, and it was not fun.

YT300000 · Post by **YT300000** » 2003-07-14 07:57pm

Mitth-raw-nuruodo wrote:Hrm, has anyone ever went to fart, but have it come out being something that's ...maybe just a little more? If so, has it ever come out a liquid? That happened to me recently. It was like i was taking a piss out of my butthole, and it was not fun.

That happens whenever I'm really, really sick.

thecreech · Post by **thecreech** » 2003-07-14 08:06pm

Mitth-raw-nuruodo wrote:Hrm, has anyone ever went to fart, but have it come out being something that's ...maybe just a little more? If so, has it ever come out a liquid? That happened to me recently. It was like i was taking a piss out of my butthole, and it was not fun.

One time i had to fart really bad and i pushed really hard and farted loud but i thought i felt a nugget hit my boxers.I checked and the force of the fart was so powerful it just hit my boxers hard making me think that i had crapped in my pants. That was scary

Post by **AdmiralKanos** » 2003-07-15 04:57am

Mitth-raw-nuruodo wrote:Hrm, has anyone ever went to fart, but have it come out being something that's ...maybe just a little more? If so, has it ever come out a liquid? That happened to me recently. It was like i was taking a piss out of my butthole, and it was not fun.

That's diarrhea.

salm · Post by **salm** » 2003-07-15 09:35am

Slartibartfast wrote:There ARE deodorizers for bathrooms. They work pretty well.

there ARE fucking WINDOWS you can open!!!