something about captain planet...

LordShaithis · Post by **LordShaithis** » 2003-07-11 05:23am

Everyone knows the fifth element is... uh... love! Or a hot chick dressed in tape who speaks gibberish... whatever...

generator_g1 · Post by **generator_g1** » 2003-07-11 05:35am

Our world in in peril...
Gaia, spirit of the Earth, can longer stand the destruction
plaguing our planet...
She sends 5 magic rings to 5 special young people...
For Kwame in Africa, with the power of Earth
From North America, Wheeler with the power of fire
From Europe, Linka with the power of wind
From Asia, Gi with the power of water
From South America, Mati with the power of heart...
When the 5 powers combine, they summon Earth's greatest
champion...Captain Planet!

generator_g1 · Post by **generator_g1** » 2003-07-11 05:39am

Alyrium Denryle wrote:Captain Planet, he's our hero, gonna take poluttion down to zero. He's our powers magnified, and he's fighting on the planet's side... "By your powers combined I am Captain Planet!"

You forgot...

We're the Planeteers, you can be one too!
Cause saving our planet is the thing to do!
Looting and polluting is not the way...
Here's what Captain Planet has to say..

"The power is yours!"

Slartibartfast · Post by **Slartibartfast** » 2003-07-11 05:43am

Damn article, I read it and now I find that I like the show. Bastards!

Post by **Steve** » 2003-07-20 03:29am

The show had enough celebrity voices....

David Warner, Meg Ryan, Ed Asner, Whoopi Goldberg, Margot Kidder, Louis Gossett Jr., Martin Sheen, Tim Curry....

And LeVar Burton for the African kid.

Bah, Captain Planet was a boy scout pussy, but Captain Pollution was fuckin' hilarious with that "evil surfer dude" voice.

El Moose Monstero · Post by **El Moose Monstero** » 2003-07-20 09:22am

We have this theory going, that all the real elements had uses, but the Heart ring was really only good for a handful of things, monkey butlers, slavery and certain actions still punishable by UK law... the horror, the horror.

Companion Cube · Post by **Companion Cube** » 2003-07-20 11:54am

Death from the Sea wrote:
Alyrium Denryle wrote:*SMACK*
Hey! that hurt....

Hey look before there was the Star Wars kid, there was this fat guy.....

http://www.mid.tec.sc.us/humanities/images/cap1.jpg

as seen here
http://www.mid.tec.sc.us/humanities/gre ... l_2001.htm

MY EYES!

Post by **Ghost Rider** » 2003-07-20 11:57am

The_Lumberjack wrote:We have this theory going, that all the real elements had uses, but the Heart ring was really only good for a handful of things, monkey butlers, slavery and certain actions still punishable by UK law... the horror, the horror.

Well he always did have that monkey on his shoulder....hmmm

neoolong · Post by **neoolong** » 2003-07-20 12:10pm

The_Lumberjack wrote:We have this theory going, that all the real elements had uses, but the Heart ring was really only good for a handful of things, monkey butlers, slavery and certain actions still punishable by UK law... the horror, the horror.

Monkey knife fights?

darthdavid · Post by **darthdavid** » 2003-07-20 01:35pm

Chimp love slaves

neoolong · Post by **neoolong** » 2003-07-20 04:30pm

darthdavid wrote:Chimp love slaves

No offense, but I'd rather have monkey knife fights than a chimp love slave.

But, what you do with your monkey is your own business.

neoolong · Post by **neoolong** » 2003-07-20 04:32pm

generator_g1 wrote: Our world in in peril...
Gaia, spirit of the Earth, can longer stand the destruction
plaguing our planet...
She sends 5 magic rings to 5 special young people...
For Kwame in Africa, with the power of Earth
From North America, Wheeler with the power of fire
From Europe, Linka with the power of wind
From Asia, Gi with the power of water
From South America, Mati with the power of heart...
When the 5 powers combine, they summon Earth's greatest
champion...Captain Planet!

I find it amusing that despite coming from all over the world, everyone speaks damn good English.

Typhonis 1 · Post by **Typhonis 1** » 2003-07-20 05:25pm

OO the planeteers and the villans never thought to hire a guy with a scoped 30-06 to remove there problem

Darksider · Post by **Darksider** » 2003-07-20 05:52pm

Typhonis 1 wrote:OO the planeteers and the villans never thought to hire a guy with a scoped 30-06 to remove there problem

Who needs a gun, just trick captain retarded into flying over any major city. The smog and car fumes will do the rest

neoolong · Post by **neoolong** » 2003-07-20 09:09pm

Typhonis 1 wrote:OO the planeteers and the villans never thought to hire a guy with a scoped 30-06 to remove there problem

It's much easier to create crappy villains than to have to make a bunch of kids realistic, but yet able to beat evil masterminds time and time again.

Typhonis 1 · Post by **Typhonis 1** » 2003-07-20 09:11pm

hmmm maybe maybe not he has some resistance to polution.....cover his globe symbol with paint that needs thinner to remove

darthdavid · Post by **darthdavid** » 2003-07-20 10:29pm

Set up an eco mess at the russian dumping grounds for old nuclear subs. Even if the blue buffoon can live long enough to do any good the kids all get cancer and die in about a year.

darthdavid · Post by **darthdavid** » 2003-07-20 10:30pm

Oh and a comprimise. We have a monkey knife fight and the victor becomes the monkey love slave. Ok?

Mutant Headcrab · Post by **Mutant Headcrab** » 2003-07-21 12:02am

Or of course we could go for humorous methods of removing those sillt "eco-centric" ideas out of those dumb Planeteers. We should place them in the paths of extreme natural occurences of their own powers. For example:
Drop Kwamee(sp? Oh who cares...) off in the middle of an earthquake that's pretty damn high on the richter scale. Drop the asian chick either in front of a Tsunami or drop her into a violent whirpool. The russian chick can be left in the path of a class 3-4 tornado. For the dumb, white boy....ahhh leave him alone. He'd be too stupid to comprehend the lesson anyway. And for that little kid with the heart thingy....God, i don't know. What the hell would you do with him?

Anyway, the point is that if they survive, keyword: if, they will hopefully see how much nature can suck and begin to piss on nature with the rest of the polluting trash (which, judging from the cartoon, would be us).

RedImperator · Post by **RedImperator** » 2003-07-21 12:20am

Mutant Headcrab wrote:And for that little kid with the heart thingy....God, i don't know. What the hell would you do with him?

Sell him to a Thai whore house. He'll get all the "love" he can stand. Maybe they'll use biodegradable lube.

Typhonis 1 · Post by **Typhonis 1** » 2003-07-21 01:54am

force him to watch 5000 hours of Barney and Friends with Telletubbies on top

Typhonis 1 · Post by **Typhonis 1** » 2003-07-21 01:55am

As for Linka hmmm a little Spanish Fly in Wheelers fruit juice will take care of her

Crossover_Maniac · Post by **Crossover_Maniac** » 2003-07-21 04:43am

Durran Korr wrote:Ah, my favorite example of American eco-Stalinism, Captain Planet. That review kicks all kinds of ass, Spanky.

So, you see Captian Planet for what he truly is. Thank Heaven I'm not the only one.

Joe · Post by **Joe** » 2003-07-21 07:24am

RedImperator wrote:
Mutant Headcrab wrote:And for that little kid with the heart thingy....God, i don't know. What the hell would you do with him?
Sell him to a Thai whore house. He'll get all the "love" he can stand. Maybe they'll use biodegradable lube.

That's tasteless and disgusting. I approve.

darthdavid · Post by **darthdavid** » 2003-07-21 11:15pm

Nah posibility he might have fun. First you've got to infect all of the tai whores with stds. Then send him in. He'll be loved to death.