George W. Bush's Resume

[Iceberg]

http://www.buzzflash.com/contributors/0 ... esume.html

George W. Bush Resume

Past work experience:

• Ran for congress and lost.
• Produced a Hollywood slasher B movie.
• Bought an oil company, but couldn't find any oil in Texas, company went bankrupt shortly after I sold all my stock.
• Bought the Texas Rangers baseball team in a sweetheart deal that took land using tax-payer money. Biggest move: Traded Sammy Sosa to the Chicago White Sox.
• With fathers help (and his name) was elected Governor of Texas.

Accomplishments:

• Changed pollution laws for power and oil companies and made Texas the most polluted state in the Union. Replaced Los Angeles with Houston as the most smog ridden city in America. Cut taxes and bankrupted the Texas government to the tune of billions in borrowed money. Set record for most executions by any Governor in American history.
• Became president after losing the popular vote by over 500,000 votes, with the help of my fathers appointments to the Supreme Court.

Accomplishments as president:

• Attacked and took over two countries.
• Spent the surplus and bankrupted the treasury.
• Shattered record for biggest annual deficit in history.
• Set economic record for most private bankruptcies filed in any 12 month period.
• Set all-time record for biggest drop in the history of the stock market.
• First president in decades to execute a federal prisoner.
• First president in US history to enter office with a criminal record.
• First year in office set the all-time record for most days on vacation by any president in US history.
• After taking the entire month of August off for vacation, presided over the worst security failure in US history.
• Set the record for most campaign fund-raising trips than any other president in US history.
• In my first two years in office over 2 million Americans lost their job.
• Cut unemployment benefits for more out of work Americans than any president in US history.
• Set the all-time record for most foreclosures in a 12 month period.
• Appointed more convicted criminals to administration positions than any president in US history.
• Set the record for the least amount of press conferences than any president since the advent of television.
• Signed more laws and executive orders circumventing the Constitution than any president in US history.
• Presided over the biggest energy crises in US history and refused to intervene when corruption was revealed.
• Presided over the highest gasoline prices in US history and refused to use the national reserves as past presidents have.
• Cut healthcare benefits for war veterans.
• Set the all-time record for most people worldwide to simultaneously take to the streets to protest me (15 million people), shattering the record for protest against any person in the history of mankind. (http://www.hyperreal.org/~dana/marches/)
• Dissolved more international treaties than any president in US history.
• My presidency is the most secretive and un-accountable of any in US history.
• Members of my cabinet are the richest of any administration in US history. (the 'poorest' multi-millionaire, Condoleeza Rice has an Chevron oil tanker named after her).
• Had more states to simultaneously go bankrupt than any president in the history of the United States.
• Presided over the biggest corporate stock market fraud of any market in any country in the history of the world.
• Created the largest government department bureaucracy in the history of the United States.
• Set the all-time record for biggest annual budget spending increases, more than any president in US history.
• First president in US history to have the United Nations remove the US from the human rights commission.
• First president in US history to have the United Nations remove the US from the elections monitoring board.
• Removed more checks and balances, and have the least amount of congressional oversight than any presidential administration in US history.
• Rendered the entire United Nations irrelevant.
• Withdrew from the World Court of Law.
• Refused to allow inspectors access to US prisoners of war and by default no longer abide by the Geneva Conventions.
• First president in US history to refuse United Nations election inspectors (during the 2002 US elections).
• All-time US (and world) record holder for most corporate campaign donations.
• My biggest life-time campaign contributor presided over one of the largest corporate bankruptcy frauds in world history (Kenneth Lay, former CEO of Enron Corporation).
• Spent more money on polls and focus groups than any president in US history.
• First president in US history to unilaterally attack a sovereign nation against the will of the United Nations and the world community.
• First president to run and hide when the US came under attack (and then lied saying the enemy had the code to Air Force 1)
  [* First US president to establish a secret shadow government.
• Took the biggest world sympathy for the US after 911, and in less than a year made the US the most resented country in the world (possibly the biggest diplomatic failure in US and world history).
• With a policy of 'dis-engagement' created the most hostile Israeli-Palestine relations in at least 30 years.
• Fist US president in history to have a majority of the people of Europe (71%) view my presidency as the biggest threat to world peace and stability.
• First US president in history to have the people of South Korea more threatened by the US than their immediate neighbor, North Korea.
• Changed US policy to allow convicted criminals to be awarded government contracts.
• Set all-time record for number of administration appointees who violated US law by not selling huge investments in corporations bidding for government contracts.
• Failed to fulfill my pledge to get Osama Bin Laden 'dead or alive'.
• Failed to capture the anthrax killer who tried to murder the leaders of our country at the United States Capitol building. After 18 months I have no leads and zero suspects.
• In the 18 months following the 911 attacks I have successfully prevented any public investigation into the biggest security failure in the history of the United States.
• Removed more freedoms and civil liberties for Americans than any other president in US history.
• In a little over two years created the most divided country in decades, possibly the most divided the US has ever been since the civil war.
• Entered office with the strongest economy in US history and in less than two years turned every single economic category heading straight down.

Records and References:

• At least one conviction for drunk driving in Maine (Texas driving record has been erased and is not available).
• AWOL from National Guard and Deserted the military during a time of war.
• Refuse to take drug test or even answer any questions about drug use.
• All records of my tenure as governor of Texas have been spirited away to my fathers library, sealed in secrecy and un-available for public view.
• All records of any SEC investigations into my insider trading or bankrupt companies are sealed in secrecy and un-available for public view.
• All minutes of meetings for any public corporation I served on the board are sealed in secrecy and un-available for public view.
• Any records or minutes from meetings I (or my VP) attended regarding public energy policy are sealed in secrecy and un-available for public review.
• For personal references please speak to my daddy or uncle James Baker (They can be reached at their offices of the Carlyle Group for war-profiteering.)

[Illuminatus Primus]

Though some of it is left wing delusional bullshit (not that I'm suprised).

Such as the whining about the UN and such and the Committees.

Yeah, such a loss to pulled off the Human Rights Committee and replaced with Libya and Cuba.

[Wicked Pilot]

Some of those critisms look legitimate, others do not. I predict this will be a very long thread. Good bye.

[Stormbringer]

Shut up with the whining about the election already. He won fair and square. The buget surplus was accounting tricks and wishful thinking. The econmy tanking because it was built of the same sort of accounting tricks and wishful thinking as the budget surplus. We fought and won two just wars, both of which actually did a world of good for the countries they were fought against.

Go back to masturbating to Ralph Nader's campaign speeches.

[Tribun]

Good job, Doublewju!

You are truely the most incompetent and dangerous president in the entire history of the US!

[Joe]

The War on Terror has been successful so far (the verdict is still out on Iraq though, to be fair) and it was the Clinton economy, not the Bush economy, that went boom when Bush took office.

I don't think I ought to participate in this thread, because it's a fucking flamepit waiting to happen.

[HemlockGrey]

I think it can be safely said that George W. Bush ranks as one of the worst diplomats in the history of the world.

[Hamel]

Some of this stuff was already debunked (although some of the debunking was so nitpicky as to be irrelevant)

[Dahak]

The War on Terror is just a nicely directed running gag.
The only thing it acchieved is to restrict the freedoms of the people, and some nice fireworks.

[Stormbringer]

I think it can be safely said that George W. Bush ranks as one of the worst diplomats in the history of the world.

I can think of a few worse. But he's got to be one of the worst the US has had in long time, possibly ever.

[Stravo]

And you know what....he still accomplished more than most of us ever will so why not just STFU and go find some relevant attacks instead of this whiney little bullshit.

[Stormbringer]

The War on Terror is just a nicely directed running gag.
The only thing it acchieved is to restrict the freedoms of the people, and some nice fireworks.

And clearing out the Taliband and Al-Queda was just fireworks? What about clearing out a number of affiliated groups in other nations?

Just because you want it to be a failure doesn't make it so.

[Tribun]

And you know what....he still accomplished more than most of us ever will so why not just STFU and go find some relevant attacks instead of this whiney little bullshit.

Hahaha.....

That you can say of all poloticans. And he is only in his current position because of his rich and influencial daddy. Otherwise, Doublewju would be sure and unemployed homless on the streets of Huston or Dallas.

[Joe]

The War on Terror is just a nicely directed running gag.
The only thing it acchieved is to restrict the freedoms of the people, and some nice fireworks.

And destroying al-Qaeda's base of operations, and killing a lot of al-Qaeda members, and decreasing al-Qaeda recruitment, and striking fear into the hearts of countries who would support terror (the ease with which we moved through Iraq is not going to be encouraging any more Middle Eastern countries to piss us off).

Despite some pretty draconian stuff on the books civil rights are still pretty secure in America, by the way.

[Stravo]

And you know what....he still accomplished more than most of us ever will so why not just STFU and go find some relevant attacks instead of this whiney little bullshit.

Hahaha.....

That you can say of all poloticans. And he is only in his current position because of his rich and influencial daddy. Otherwise, Doublewju would be sure and unemployed homless on the streets of Huston or Dallas.

And you wouldn't take advantage if you had an influential daddy? Yeah OK.

[Dahak]

The War on Terror is just a nicely directed running gag.
The only thing it acchieved is to restrict the freedoms of the people, and some nice fireworks.

And clearing out the Taliband and Al-Queda was just fireworks? What about clearing out a number of affiliated groups in other nations?

Just because you want it to be a failure doesn't make it so.

The Taliban an dAl_Qaeda are still around, now they've just not centered in one spot.
Beheading one organization doesn't solve the underlying cause for creating it in the first place.

[Stravo]

The War on Terror is just a nicely directed running gag.
The only thing it acchieved is to restrict the freedoms of the people, and some nice fireworks.

And clearing out the Taliband and Al-Queda was just fireworks? What about clearing out a number of affiliated groups in other nations?

Just because you want it to be a failure doesn't make it so.

The Taliban an dAl_Qaeda are still around, now they've just not centered in one spot.
Beheading one organization doesn't solve the underlying cause for creating it in the first place.

Hmmm...that smells suspiciously like one of those "You asked for it" arguments brewing right under the surface.

[Illuminatus Primus]

And you know what....he still accomplished more than most of us ever will so why not just STFU and go find some relevant attacks instead of this whiney little bullshit.

What'd you expect of Iceberg?

[HemlockGrey]

And you know what....he still accomplished more than most of us ever will so why not just STFU and go find some relevant attacks instead of this whiney little bullshit.

Bullshit. Just because someone accomplished something doesn't make them immune to criticism; if it did we better all shut up and let Fearless Leader rule our lives. One of the fulcrums of democracy is a populace who will take any opportunity to criticize the shit out of their leader.

Bush did fuck up diplomatically. I supported the war but I am apalled at how badly Bush manhandled it. He's single-handedly got all of Europe up in arms over it. People in South Korea are protesting against him, for God's sake! I'm not saying that these South Koreans aren't idiots, but it takes a very special brand of incompentence to inspire fear in longtime allies of the US through actions taken half a world away.

[Stormbringer]

The Taliban an dAl_Qaeda are still around, now they've just not centered in one spot.
Beheading one organization doesn't solve the underlying cause for creating it in the first place.

It takes time to eradicate a movement like that, especially a group of highly fanatical loonies. But the fact remains that we have done a great deal damage and have done a great deal to cripple them.

And you're really an asshole if you suggest that those thousands of innocents who died and their families deserved it because of US policy.

[Dahak]

The Taliban an dAl_Qaeda are still around, now they've just not centered in one spot.
Beheading one organization doesn't solve the underlying cause for creating it in the first place.

It takes time to eradicate a movement like that, especially a group of highly fanatical loonies. But the fact remains that we have done a great deal damage and have done a great deal to cripple them.

And you're really an asshole if you suggest that those thousands of innocents who died and their families deserved it because of US policy.

Asshole? How...pathetic.

In a war people die. (TM)
Istn't that a highly fancied argument out there and especially amongst Americans?

Beheading on head of the Medusa won't kill it. Terrorism isn't something localized, with a clear border. Sooner, or later, it will come back. And again. And again. Until there's a reason for people to become terrorist.

[Joe]

I think it can be safely said that George W. Bush ranks as one of the worst diplomats in the history of the world.

Of course he's a bad diplomat. Not that we need a good diplomat in office right now, we just need to tell the rest of the world what we're going to do and let them decide whether they want to support us or not. He's pursuing the right course with foreign policy, and that's what matters.

I also applaud a few of the things on this "resume," especially being kicked out of the UN Humans Rights Commission (wouldn't want to be in the same league as Libya, anyway) and pulling out of the World Court.

[Stravo]

And you know what....he still accomplished more than most of us ever will so why not just STFU and go find some relevant attacks instead of this whiney little bullshit.

Bullshit. Just because someone accomplished something doesn't make them immune to criticism; if it did we better all shut up and let Fearless Leader rule our lives. One of the fulcrums of democracy is a populace who will take any opportunity to criticize the shit out of their leader.

Bush did fuck up diplomatically. I supported the war but I am apalled at how badly Bush manhandled it. He's single-handedly got all of Europe up in arms over it. People in South Korea are protesting against him, for God's sake! I'm not saying that these South Koreans aren't idiots, but it takes a very special brand of incompentence to inspire fear in longtime allies of the US through actions taken half a world away.

OMG you mean we NEVER had a president that decided that what the country needs is more important than placating some so called allies? Every president has a right to forge the diplomatic policy he feels is best for the country and I would think that right now the American people's foremost thought is security and making sure we don't have another 9/11 not whether South Korea is *GASP* offended at us.

Much like Mayo in an Officer and a Gentlemen They have no where else to go.

[Joe]

Beheading on head of the Medusa won't kill it. Terrorism isn't something localized, with a clear border. Sooner, or later, it will come back. And again. And again. Until there's a reason for people to become terrorist.

Then we'll just bomb and kill them. Again, and again, and again, until they have had enough.

And your argument here would be stronger if the terrorists in question were coming out of countries like Iraq, that have actually suffered from U.S. foreign policy, or even Palestine. On the contrary, most terrorists come from Saudi Arabia, a country that we have supported in the past.

[Tribun]

It is futile, to chop off a head, when your enemy is a Hydra.