The Customer is Uniquely Stupid

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Drewcifer
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Post by Drewcifer »

When I was a waiter, I hated it when underage kids tried to trick me into serving them alcohol.

bubbly teen-age girl: I'll have a daquiri.

me: Can I see some ID, please?

bubbly girl: Oh, I wanted that virgin.

Riiiiiight.

The worst customer I've ever dealt with though was right after 9/11 when all the planes were still grounded. I was working for a paramedical company -- we took specimen samples for people applying for life insurance -- and one agent was upset that we couldn't get one of her client's specimens to the lab by overnight delivery. She didn't seem to care about what had happened, or the fucking fact that nothing was going cross country overnight, because there were no fucking planes flying. I really wanted to strangle that one, so goddamned self-absorbed and insensitive.
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Post by Dahak »

Spyder wrote:Where I work processing a card doesn't take any longer then processing cash so it doesn't worry me.

What does piss me off are cheques, or more specifically people who get pissed off with the various requirements for paying by check.

Some get pissed off when they find they have to fill out their contact details on the back, but grudingly do it. Some get pissed off because they need a valid form of ID, but either present it or get pissed off and leave...or demand to speak to the manager who smiles at them and repeats
everything I just told them.

One time this woman tried to pay by cheque but didn't have a valid form of ID. "Fucking hell, fuck this!" She yelled loud enough for everyone within 50ft to turn around and look at her. She then pulled a $50 out of her handbag and payed cash...
You really use cheques over there?
That's funny...
Thing that pisses me off number 2: Finance contracts for cell phones.
If you can't afford to pay $500US for a cell phone then perhaps you're not the kind of person that should own a $500US cell phone. I liken it to wearing an Amani suit to a job as a checkout operator. I've also found that most people trying to finance something for around that $ value and under will vey seldomly meet the criteria for approval. And then there's the same problem that you get with cheques, ID.

This one guy wanted to finance one of those phones, didn't have ID.
"What do people that don't have a photo ID do then?" This guy whined. They don't get finance obviously.
You have to pay the full price for a cell phone? Even if you just signed the contract? No subsidized cell phones for 1$ or the like from the cell phone company?
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Post by CmdrSweevo »

Nathan F wrote:The woman came storming back in about 5 minutes later, making a big deal that I had rang up her bananas for 19 cents per pound instead of 15 cents. The total price differenc after tax: 43 cents...
LOL Oh yes, my pet hate... I work in a bookshop that offers a 10% discount to employees of a local firm. And people use it for everything! I've stood there writing up a discount form - with the queue growing because you've already scanned the card through and so are tying up the till - on a £1.60 birthday card. All that for 16p.

It's like when I go down the newsagents for some milk and the manager says he'll give me petty cash for it. It's only 30p, I won't miss it...
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Post by Vertigo1 »

verilon wrote:Old story but a good one. While working at the movie theater, had some lady yell at us for someone saying the word "suck." Then, she goes 30ft away, and our manager is telling us to watch our language, cos apparently people get offended by the word "suck." She turns around and yells, "I heard that!" Blah blah blah...

~ver
Ohh shit, that reminded me. There was this time when I was at Wal-mart and I caught up with a friend of mine. We got to talking and I brought up how a certain game sucked. I swear, a couple of old ladies turned their heads at me like I had said "fuck" as loud as I could! They came over and started bitching at me because I "swore". At that point, I was pissed so told them as nicely as I could "Excuse me, but would you kindly take your uptight PC bullshit and shove it up your ass and rotate it?" and walked off. I swear, I thought their jaws were going to hit the floor. :D Then as we were on our way out, I was talking about how some stupid reality show sucked when some sockermom told me to watch my language. I looked at my friend and grined, turned back towards the sockermom and told her to fuck off and then walked out. :) I didn't even give a damn what expression she had on her face at the time because my friend and I were laughing at their uptight attitudes.
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Post by fgalkin »

Superman wrote:Is having an accent required in tech support? Every time I call Lynxs or Yahoo tech support, I get some guy that just stepped off the boat from India or Ireland. Does INS require you to work in tech support before you get your green card?
You know, I'm considering getting a job as a telemarketer, and torturing them with my heavy Russian accent. :twisted: :D

Have a very nice day.
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Post by Spyder »

Dahak wrote: You really use cheques over there?
That's funny...
People that can't let go of the old ways use cheques. Personally I've never used one in my life nor do I intend to, cards are infinately more efficient.
You have to pay the full price for a cell phone? Even if you just signed the contract? No subsidized cell phones for 1$ or the like from the cell phone company?
On a daytime contract you can get certain phones for free. This guy wanted it on pre-pay.
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Post by haas mark »

fgalkin wrote:
Superman wrote:Is having an accent required in tech support? Every time I call Lynxs or Yahoo tech support, I get some guy that just stepped off the boat from India or Ireland. Does INS require you to work in tech support before you get your green card?
You know, I'm considering getting a job as a telemarketer, and torturing them with my heavy Russian accent. :twisted: :D

Have a very nice day.
-fgalkin
Better than an Indian one.. [shudders]

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Post by EmperorMing »

Superman wrote:Is having an accent required in tech support? Every time I call Lynxs or Yahoo tech support, I get some guy that just stepped off the boat from India or Ireland. Does INS require you to work in tech support before you get your green card?
The main reason at this time that I am considering leaving the IT field and going back to being a mechanic. Try sending a wrench job overseas... :P
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Re: The Customer is Uniquely Stupid

Post by His Divine Shadow »

weemadando wrote:A rant thread for all of us in retail, hospitalities or front-office work.

Just had a great one...

2 girls just came in and asked:

"Does it cost anything to use the computers?"

*cue blank confused expression* "...Yeessss..."

"Oh."

2 girls leave.
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Post by His Divine Shadow »

Solid Snake wrote:I personally hated when people used their fucking credit card to buy something that was like, 5 dollars.
*shrug*
If I'm out of money I always use my credit card, I don't really see a big problem, they pull the card through the machine, give it back, then I just enter my security code on the machine facing me, doesn't take any longer than giving the clerk money and getting change back.

Ofcourse then there are the more old-style machines where you do the same thing but instead of entering your security code you write your name on a receit.

But there are even older machines, like the ones where the clerk puts the card and this bank paper thing in it and just drag another thing over it(creates a form of imprint on the paper from the card) and then write the amount of money you wish to withdraw and then the signature.
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Post by His Divine Shadow »

Dahak wrote:You have to pay the full price for a cell phone? Even if you just signed the contract? No subsidized cell phones for 1$ or the like from the cell phone company?
I'm more shocked that there are cell-phones for 500$

And whats with the contracts anyway? Don't you just buy the phone you want and then put the chip you get from your cell-phone company of choice into it?
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Post by Faram »

His Divine Shadow wrote:I'm more shocked that there are cell-phones for 500$

And whats with the contracts anyway? Don't you just buy the phone you want and then put the chip you get from your cell-phone company of choice into it?
The only phone in the $500+range I can think of is the SonyEricsson P800

Anyways I did hear about you poor sods have to PAY to recive calls on a cell phone :lol:

Anyone trying that scam here would be laughed out of buissnes...
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Post by His Divine Shadow »

Faram wrote:Anyways I did hear about you poor sods have to PAY to recive calls on a cell phone :lol:
WTF are you talking about? :wtf:
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Post by Faram »

His Divine Shadow wrote:*shrug*
If I'm out of money I always use my credit card, I don't really see a big problem, they pull the card through the machine, give it back, then I just enter my security code on the machine facing me, doesn't take any longer than giving the clerk money and getting change back.

Ofcourse then there are the more old-style machines where you do the same thing but instead of entering your security code you write your name on a receit.

But there are even older machines, like the ones where the clerk puts the card and this bank paper thing in it and just drag another thing over it(creates a form of imprint on the paper from the card) and then write the amount of money you wish to withdraw and then the signature.
Same here, I usually only casrry 300skr ~$25 or so on me anything more expensive than that and I use my Debit card.

Btw in most stores you get to pull the card yourself and then enter the pin.

There is a moment from the stores here to get us to use the cards more, saves a bundle on the mony handeling process and lessens the risk of robbery when there is less cash in the teller mashines.
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Post by Faram »

His Divine Shadow wrote:
Faram wrote:Anyways I did hear about you poor sods have to PAY to recive calls on a cell phone :lol:
WTF are you talking about? :wtf:
Saw that in an other newsgroop. The yanks have to pay to recive calls on the cell phone! :lol:


Edit sorry HDS now when I reread the msg it could appear as if I directed that comment to you. That was not my intension.
Last edited by Faram on 2003-08-25 03:18am, edited 2 times in total.
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"Either God wants to abolish evil, and cannot; or he can, but does not want to. ... If he wants to, but cannot, he is impotent. If he can, but does not want to, he is wicked. ... If, as they say, God can abolish evil, and God really wants to do it, why is there evil in the world?" -Epicurus


Fear is the mother of all gods.

Nature does all things spontaneously, by herself, without the meddling of the gods. -Lucretius
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Post by His Divine Shadow »

Faram wrote:Saw that in an other newsgroop. The yanks have to pay to recive calls on the cell phone! :lol:
But I'm not a yank.
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Post by Faram »

His Divine Shadow wrote:
Faram wrote:Saw that in an other newsgroop. The yanks have to pay to recive calls on the cell phone! :lol:
But I'm not a yank.
Reread my last msg edited it..

And I know you are not an yank just a bit fast at the typing this morning ;)
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"Either God wants to abolish evil, and cannot; or he can, but does not want to. ... If he wants to, but cannot, he is impotent. If he can, but does not want to, he is wicked. ... If, as they say, God can abolish evil, and God really wants to do it, why is there evil in the world?" -Epicurus


Fear is the mother of all gods.

Nature does all things spontaneously, by herself, without the meddling of the gods. -Lucretius
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Post by CaptainChewbacca »

I try to be nice to salespeople who are nice to me. One time I got too much change back, an extra $10. I went back in and gave it to the girl, and she was shocked that anyone would.


Oh, and I do recommend a Russian accident for phone sales. I can immitate my mother when I want to, and ruin their day. I sometimes use it AGAINST the telemarketers :twisted:.
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Post by haas mark »

Faram wrote:
His Divine Shadow wrote:
Faram wrote:Anyways I did hear about you poor sods have to PAY to recive calls on a cell phone :lol:
WTF are you talking about? :wtf:
Saw that in an other newsgroop. The yanks have to pay to recive calls on the cell phone! :lol:
It's called limited minutes.. and then I don't care cos I have a cell service that has unlimited service. So yeah.

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Post by Col. Crackpot »

at a restaraunt i worked at years ago a few guys come in to eat and tie one on a the bar. they eat their meal and drink several beers each and then suddenly realize they don't have enough money to pay. One guy thinks he is a smart guy and pulls out his credit card. the bird brain assistant-manager helping the bartender asks to see his ID becuase in lieu of a signature on his credit card he had written "see ID". Well turns out he was only 19. Long story short he gets arrested and the bartender gets fired (and arrested) and the restaraunt nearly loses it's liqour liscence.
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Post by Zac Naloen »

Someone asked me the other day why it is we didn't have his size shoe in stock at our store.

My reply "because we sold them all"

He wasn't impressed and stormed out the shop. :lol:
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Post by DPDarkPrimus »

CaptainChewbacca wrote: Oh, and I do recommend a Russian accident for phone sales.
What, like "I can't talk now, I spilled my vodka"?
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Post by Shadow WarChief »

Well I can't really bring up anything work related because job-pickings are slim for a high school student. But I've got some dad+technology stories



•My dad's laying down on his bed frantically pushing buttons on the remote. He says it's not working. I walk over, and turn the remote around so that it's actually pointing at the TV instead of him and just walk away....

•My dad is in front of the computer pushing random buttons to wake up the computer from its sleep. He asks me to come figure out what's wrong. So I walk over.....and press the power button....and then slowly walk away.....

• Once when I was ~7 years old, we're at an intersection in the car. He tells me to look out the right window to see if there's anything coming from that directon. I see there's a big street car coming down the hill and I tell him not to go....and he goes.... My face was literally less than a meter away from the front of the 10+ ton street car about to slam into us at 20mph. It missed us by inches

•And of course the literally hundreds of times I've had to explain to him how to work the power locks and windows on the car....

:?
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Post by Lonestar »

fgalkin wrote: You know, I'm considering getting a job as a telemarketer, and torturing them with my heavy Russian accent. :twisted: :D

Have a very nice day.
-fgalkin
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Seriously, you want some fucked up customer stories? Let The Gord teach you.
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Post by Spyder »

Faram wrote:
His Divine Shadow wrote:I'm more shocked that there are cell-phones for 500$

And whats with the contracts anyway? Don't you just buy the phone you want and then put the chip you get from your cell-phone company of choice into it?
The only phone in the $500+range I can think of is the SonyEricsson P800

Anyways I did hear about you poor sods have to PAY to recive calls on a cell phone :lol:

Anyone trying that scam here would be laughed out of buissnes...
It was a Sharp GX10i. It's actually a bit less then $500USD now that NZD is worth more vs USD then it used to be.
Last edited by Spyder on 2003-08-25 08:14pm, edited 1 time in total.
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