Masturbation techniques

OT: anything goes!

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Xenophobe3691
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Post by Xenophobe3691 »

LadyTevar wrote:
Raxmei wrote:Do shoggoths count as toys or partners?



.................... What is with all the Tenacle/Cthulu porn this past week?!?! :wtf: :shock: :banghead:
At least it isn't midget porn...
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Post by Peregrin Toker »

LadyTevar wrote:
Raxmei wrote:Do shoggoths count as toys or partners?



.................... What is with all the Tenacle/Cthulu porn this past week?!?! :wtf: :shock: :banghead:
I, at least, didn't go beyond mental imagery of Asenath Waite (from HPL's The Thing On The Doorstep) and Willow Rosenberg (from Buffy The Vampire Slayer) having "intimate relations"...

BUT SHOGGOTH PORN??? Even Derleth wouldn't approve of that.
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Post by Xenophobe3691 »

Who's Shoggoth?
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Post by The Cleric »

Or what, as the case may be (assuming some sort of relation to the comparisons).
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Post by neoolong »

Vorlon1701 wrote:Who's Shoggoth?
Considering that it is related to Cthulhu and sex, do you really want to know?
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Post by Xenophobe3691 »

neoolong wrote:
Vorlon1701 wrote:Who's Shoggoth?
Considering that it is related to Cthulhu and sex, do you really want to know?
Considering my curiosity and it's famous tendency to burn the crap out of me...

Yes please.
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Post by Peregrin Toker »

Vorlon1701 wrote:Who's Shoggoth?
Here's a description of a Shoggoth, from At The Mountains Of Madness
H.P. Lovecraft wrote: It was a terrible, indescribable thing vaster than any subway train ? a shapeless congeries of protoplasmic bubbles, faintly self-luminous, and with myriads of temporary eyes forming and unforming as pustules of greenish light all over the tunnel-filling front that bore down upon us, crushing the frantic penguins and slithering over the glistening floor that it and its kind had swept so evilly free of all litter.
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Post by aerius »

LadyTevar wrote:.................... What is with all the Tenacle/Cthulu porn this past week?!?! :wtf: :shock: :banghead:
It's because you touch yourself at night. :P
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aerius: I'll vote for you if you sleep with me. :)
Lusankya: Deal!
Say, do you want it to be a threesome with your wife? Or a foursome with your wife and sister-in-law? I'm up for either. :P
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Post by Peregrin Toker »

aerius wrote:
LadyTevar wrote:.................... What is with all the Tenacle/Cthulu porn this past week?!?! :wtf: :shock: :banghead:
It's because you touch yourself at night. :P
I thought it was because....

(dramatic music starts playing in the background)

Who controls the british crown, who keeps the metric system down?
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Post by Shaka[Zulu] »

well... I can actually do it with the use of mental imagery (ie no physical assistance whatsoever -- not even pics or video) alone, although the image Im using has to be pretty damn good -- often involving girls I know, but cant approach for whatever reason. typically tho, that only serves to get me started, and physical actuation becomes necessary.
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Post by The Cleric »

:shock: Why do I even bother :shock:
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Post by Vertigo1 »

aerius wrote:Damn you big-dicked bastards! Either that or you have small hands. :P
Mwah! :D Actually, my hand is about 8 1/2 inches from wrist to fingertips and 4" from one side of my palm to the other. :) I'm also 7" long. What does that tell you? ;)
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Post by Gandalf »

Vertigo1 wrote:
aerius wrote:Damn you big-dicked bastards! Either that or you have small hands. :P
Mwah! :D Actually, my hand is about 8 1/2 inches from wrist to fingertips and 4" from one side of my palm to the other. :) I'm also 7" long. What does that tell you? ;)
That I'm bigger. :P
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Post by Einhander Sn0m4n »

Vertigo1 wrote:Two-fisted technique for me. :)


As for multiple orgasms....I've only been able to do that one time when I was 14. I've tried my damnest to do it again, to no avail. :( All I can say is, it felt so damn good that I nearly passed out! (yes, it actually is possible. I even ejaculated twice as much as normal! This was immediately after the first too.)

Probably gonna regret posting that last bit later cuz koji and Einy are prolly gonna nag the hell out of me over it. :P
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Raxmei wrote:Do shoggoths count as toys or partners?
Why oh WHY THE FUCK do you want to know that!!?!? On second thought, I DON'T WANT TO KNOW!!!!
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Post by Einhander Sn0m4n »

Gandalf wrote:
Vertigo1 wrote:
aerius wrote:Damn you big-dicked bastards! Either that or you have small hands. :P
Mwah! :D Actually, my hand is about 8 1/2 inches from wrist to fingertips and 4" from one side of my palm to the other. :) I'm also 7" long. What does that tell you? ;)
That I'm bigger. :P
And I am too. :D

BTW my hands are about the size of Vert's hands. People say I have extremely long skinny fingers too. Perfect H4x0r's hands!
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Post by Gandalf »

Einhander Sn0m4n wrote:
Gandalf wrote:
Vertigo1 wrote: Mwah! :D Actually, my hand is about 8 1/2 inches from wrist to fingertips and 4" from one side of my palm to the other. :) I'm also 7" long. What does that tell you? ;)
That I'm bigger. :P
And I am too. :D

BTW my hands are about the size of Vert's hands. People say I have extremely long skinny fingers too. Perfect H4x0r's hands!
My hands are about that big, and I'm not fully grown yet. :D
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Post by His Divine Shadow »

Simon H.Johansen wrote:(dramatic music starts playing in the background)

Who controls the british crown, who keeps the metric system down?
No one!
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Post by Vertigo1 »

Einhander Sn0m4n wrote:BTW my hands are about the size of Vert's hands. People say I have extremely long skinny fingers too. Perfect H4x0r's hands!
I do too. :) They're perfect for reaching for small parts in tight places.....as well as being the ladies' best friends. :D
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Post by Einhander Sn0m4n »

Vertigo1 wrote:
Einhander Sn0m4n wrote:BTW my hands are about the size of Vert's hands. People say I have extremely long skinny fingers too. Perfect H4x0r's hands!
I do too. :) They're perfect for reaching for small parts in tight places.....as well as being the ladies' best friends. :D
Or the guys' best friends. Prostate Massage, anyone? I'll be having all y'alls dicks drooling precum like Niagara Falls in no time!!!

EDIT: ;) :twisted: :twisted: :twisted: :twisted: :twisted: :twisted: :twisted:
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Post by Xenophobe3691 »

Einhander Sn0m4n wrote: Or the guys' best friends. Prostate Massage, anyone? I'll be having all y'alls dicks drooling precum like Niagara Falls in no time!!!

EDIT: ;) :twisted: :twisted: :twisted: :twisted: :twisted: :twisted: :twisted:
:shock: :shock: :shock: Holy shit that's one bad image... :shock: :shock: :shock:
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Post by Einhander Sn0m4n »

Vorlon1701 wrote:
Einhander Sn0m4n wrote: Or the guys' best friends. Prostate Massage, anyone? I'll be having all y'alls dicks drooling precum like Niagara Falls in no time!!!

EDIT: ;) :twisted: :twisted: :twisted: :twisted: :twisted: :twisted: :twisted:
:shock: :shock: :shock: Holy shit that's one bad image... :shock: :shock: :shock:
Good. 8) 8) FUQ, anyone?
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Post by Vertigo1 »

Einhander Sn0m4n wrote:Good. 8) 8) FUQ, anyone?
Not recently. ;) (I had to say it!)
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Post by Einhander Sn0m4n »

Vertigo1 wrote:
Einhander Sn0m4n wrote:Good. 8) 8) FUQ, anyone?
Not recently. ;) (I had to say it!)
ROFLMAO!!!

That's

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FUNNY!!!
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Post by aerius »

Vertigo1 wrote:Mwah! :D Actually, my hand is about 8 1/2 inches from wrist to fingertips and 4" from one side of my palm to the other. :) I'm also 7" long. What does that tell you? ;)
It tells me you have a bigger dick than I do. On the other hand I have a sexy GF to stick my dick into every day, so I guess that makes up for my little pecker. :D
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aerius: I'll vote for you if you sleep with me. :)
Lusankya: Deal!
Say, do you want it to be a threesome with your wife? Or a foursome with your wife and sister-in-law? I'm up for either. :P
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Post by DPDarkPrimus »

Must... kill... aerius...
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