If you had to die laughing at one thing ...

Durandal · Post by **Durandal** » 2003-09-23 12:52am

Okay, I need to lighten up a little. If you had to die laughing at one thing, what would it be? Here's one of my choice excerpts from Kynes' lavishly hilarious fanfic, El Boydo. I almost die laughing while reading it anyway.

El Boydo wrote:The sun was rising but Mad Man Mark was already awake. Making the bed was easy. Kicking the pile of dirty laundry (not his, nor was it anyone's who knew him) over in the corner for now, he was ready for action.

First order of duty: read secret messages in Faux News.

Upside down and covered in magazines in another corner of the basement was a black-and-white TV which, for some reason, was wired for cable. He turned it over and on, tuned it to channel 34 on his UHF dial, and watched the fuzzy, rolling picture, turning the volume to maximum.

"OUR TOP STORY: FORMER PRESIDENT BILL CLINTON TAKES A CRAP. OUR FAIR AND BALANCED EXPERTS DEBATE WHETHER THE HOUSE SHOULD CONVENE A COMMITTEE OR IS THIS THE SENATE'S JOB? AS ALWAYS, BOTH SIDES OF THE ISSUE, COMING UP, BUT FIRST, A WORD FROM OUR SPONSOR..."

He leaned way over then, pressing his face directly against the glass, although, weirdly, he did not bend his knees at all. Anyone entering the basement at that point would see a skinny, very pale, Mad Man Mark, wearing nothing but tighty-whities, bent almost completely over with his face against a television. More frightening is that if they had lived with him for any length of time, this would not even faze them.

The advertisements came on, and with them, the secret messages. Mad Man Mark had his pencil (pens were for communists who didn't believe in erasing everything they wrote; why not just mail it directly to the DUMB-oment? ok, he granted, that one sucked, but give him a minute and he'll find a way to work it in... governRAT? shit) and paper ready.

"DO YOU LIKE AMMO? DO YOU LIKE OLD PEOPLE? THEN HAVE I GOT THE MAGAZINE FOR YOU..."

Furiously, Mad Man Mark began writing. He wasn't writing anything meaningful, as he couldn't read or write with any proficiency... but the motion of the pencil allowed him to delay orgasm through this commercial.

Secret messages, yeah. On Faux News. Definitely secret messages.

Okay, now your turn.

Howedar · Post by **Howedar** » 2003-09-23 12:59am

Having an inordinate amount of fun with all of my friends.

Lord Poe · Post by **Lord Poe** » 2003-09-23 01:15am

Having George Lucas scream in Scooter's face that the EU is part of the overall SW continuity were canon is silent! I envision the scene in "Jay and Silent Bob Strikes Back" where Bob screams at Jay!

"THE EU IS CANON WHERE THE MOVIES ARE SILENT! YOU. STUPID. FUCK!"

Companion Cube · Post by **Companion Cube** » 2003-09-23 01:48am

I'd prefer to die laughing at Tubgirl. The reason for this is because if I could ever find...that amusing, life wouldn't be worth living.

Post by **Kuja** » 2003-09-23 01:50am

Reading the entire FUQ, then the humor section of the Archive before letting all my pent-up laughter out.

Sheez, I'd fucking EXPLODE...

Laird · Post by **Laird** » 2003-09-23 02:06am

I could die laughing as Eihander tried not to act all ADD all the time.

Watching him try and be normal would cause my ribs to crack.

Post by **Ghost Rider** » 2003-09-23 02:32am

Peter David beating Bill Jemas with a wiffle bat.

That or debating the moron in front of the San Diego show(ah the memories of PAD doing it to Todd)

Slartibartfast · Post by **Slartibartfast** » 2003-09-23 12:07pm

I almost die laughing at this:

http://www.pointlesswasteoftime.com/mat ... ailer.html

But I do that with a lot of articles in that site

The Cleric · Post by **The Cleric** » 2003-09-23 05:11pm

NOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!! I must not see what happens before I see the movie!!!

Utsanomiko · Post by **Utsanomiko** » 2003-09-23 07:00pm

Right now, the only thing I could think of would be if I were over at a friend's/relative's house, and this dog were to walk in. I'd at least run out of breath and get a cramp from laughing.

Col. Crackpot · Post by **Col. Crackpot** » 2003-09-23 07:07pm

the SD.net crew on the simpsons. Darth Wong and Darkstar get hired at the nuclear plant. Some pointless loony redneck nonsense with Shep and Cletus the Slack Jawed Yokel. Dalton and Homer ....... tumbleweeds blowing across the parking lot at Lard Lad Donuts in the noon day sun.... a faint whistling.....spurs on the sidewalk....... children run away in fear... a duel betrween masters!

Rye · Post by **Rye** » 2003-09-23 07:08pm

A massive run of TMWRNJ, Fist Of Fun, Father Ted, Monty Python, Red Dwarf and other such funnies. That would be a decent way to go.

salm · Post by **salm** » 2003-09-23 07:23pm

i´d want to die laughing while fucking lucy liu up the ass.

Col. Crackpot · Post by **Col. Crackpot** » 2003-09-23 07:27pm

salm wrote:i´d want to die laughing while fucking lucy liu up the ass.

while she eats out Shakira in a room filled with masturbaiting college women vollyball players.

CmdrWilkens · Post by **CmdrWilkens** » 2003-09-23 09:52pm

Col. Crackpot wrote:
salm wrote:i´d want to die laughing while fucking lucy liu up the ass.
while she eats out Shakira in a room filled with masturbaiting college women vollyball players.

Any paticular reason for chosing volleyball chicks?

Wicked Pilot · Post by **Wicked Pilot** » 2003-09-23 10:02pm

Just give me one more season of Family Guy and I will die laughing happily.

Chardok · Post by **Chardok** » 2003-09-23 10:27pm

I would like to die laughing at Jim Carey's scene in Liar, Liar when he's telling that witch of a lawyer what his "Case" is.
"My case is simply this:"
NYEYEYEYYEEEEEEEEE
BLAAAAUGHFHASDFH
SHOBADOBAHBOBAHBOBAHDOAAYAYBUY!!!!

ROFLMMFAO!!!

Durandal · Post by **Durandal** » 2003-09-23 11:49pm

CmdrWilkens wrote:
Col. Crackpot wrote:
salm wrote:i´d want to die laughing while fucking lucy liu up the ass.
while she eats out Shakira in a room filled with masturbaiting college women vollyball players.
Any paticular reason for chosing volleyball chicks?

Did your high school have a girls' volleyball team? Mine did. Athletic girls in short, black spandex and tight tops would definitely be the way to go.

CmdrWilkens · Post by **CmdrWilkens** » 2003-09-24 01:04am

Durandal wrote:
CmdrWilkens wrote:Any paticular reason for chosing volleyball chicks?
Did your high school have a girls' volleyball team? Mine did. Athletic girls in short, black spandex and tight tops would definitely be the way to go.

We did have a volleyball team but half the girls were the ones with enough muscles to be on the football team. The hot chicks in my school were the swimmers, plus their outfit is skin tight and high cut.

Sriad · Post by **Sriad** » 2003-09-24 02:05am

Slartibartfast wrote:I almost die laughing at this:

http://www.pointlesswasteoftime.com/mat ... ailer.html

But I do that with a lot of articles in that site

Fierce...Biting...Teeth...

(Can't breathe)